brunette kim... save me. brunette kim. save me brunette kim
42 notes
·
View notes
Quick question, who here knows what a Chicago sunroof is? Anybody? You, sir? No? Okay. True story. Back home there was this guy named Chet. Now Chet was a real asshole. He might have owed me some money. He might have slept with my wife before she became my ex-wife. The details don't matter. Suffice to say I was wronged. All right, so one summer evening I was out having a few drinks, one or two, maybe three, heh, yu get the picture. And who do I see? Chet. He drove up and he double-parked outside a Dairy Queen and went in to get some soft-serve. Now Chet drove—and just to give you an idea of exactly what kind of a douchebag this guy was—he drove a white, pearlescent BMW Series 7 with a white leather interior. So I saw that thing, and I'd had a few, like I said. And, uh... I climbed up top, and I may have...defecated, uhhh, through the sunroof. Not my finest hour, I'll grant you that. But that's what a Chicago sunroof is. Now you know! It's a real thing, I didn't make it up. I'm not the first person to do it, there's a name for it. Guy wanted some soft-serve, I gave him some soft serve. I did not know that his children were in the back seat. There was a level of tint on the windows that I'll maintain to this day was not legal on an Illinois-licensed vehicle. But somehow that's on me, I guess! Who leaves two Cub Scouts in a double-parked car with the engine running? Come on. Now Chet was connected, you see, like Cicero-connected. So usually I'd be looking at malicious mischief, public intoxication, disorderly conduct, maybe. But he's got the DA saying indecent exposure, calling me a sex offender. What?! One little Chicago sunroof, and suddenly I'm Charles Manson? And that's where it went off the rails! I've been paying for it ever since, that's why I'm here.
80 notes
·
View notes
the people who like better call saul are party people
10 notes
·
View notes
me when it’s 9:13 am: END OF SNACK BREAK
404 notes
·
View notes
“Kim, doing this… it’s not you. You would not be okay with it. Not in the cold light of day.” — s5ep10
BETTER CALL SAUL, 2015–2022
395 notes
·
View notes
most insane set of responses i've ever seen. chuck would just sit in his space blanket and do the crossword. lalo would stand like this 🧍♂️ in the doorway for 6 hours and then shoot you in the head
94 notes
·
View notes
Let’s be real, Gus has probably secretly saved Hector from at least a dozen other assassination attempts that we haven’t seen. Here’s a sampling:
A young Juan Bolsa, probably
His mistress
3 separate waiters that Hector made cry on three separate occasions
Marco and Leonel’s nanny
Lyle, who was just trying to make Mr. Fring proud
83 notes
·
View notes