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shortcrust · 5 hours
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shortcrust · 7 hours
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Ivan Kramskoi - Girl With Cat (Sophia Ivanovna Kramskoi), 1882
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shortcrust · 2 days
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how i look bagging the baddest bitch in the ton after doing everything wrong
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shortcrust · 2 days
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shortcrust · 3 days
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Something that I first applied to working with children, and have applied in a limited form to working with adults: you don't need to tell someone when they read your instructions wrong. Sometimes it's enough to point out what they did right and then whatever they didn't do? You ask them to do it in more precise words, and you make it sound like it's a new request. Remarkable how fast things get done this way.
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shortcrust · 3 days
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shortcrust · 5 days
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Just got done talking to god and he says next time you’re being reincarnated into one of those bouncy balls with a thing trapped in it and you’re the thing that’s trapped :/
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shortcrust · 5 days
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I'm wheezing
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shortcrust · 6 days
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my dealer : got you some straight gas here ⛽🔥😜 this new strain is called "into the wild". you'll be zonked out of your gourd
me : yeah whatever. i don't feel shit.
5 minutes later : dude i swear i just saw a kittypet near the border
my buddy : [pacing around the camp] tigerclaw is lying to us
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shortcrust · 6 days
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The nature of being me is that every so often, when trying to do some sort of fic, I just reinvent my Cobra Kai widowed!Amanda LaRusso/Johnny Lawrence thing again. This has happened several times.
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shortcrust · 6 days
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finally an article from a gaming establishment that understands how to play this game
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shortcrust · 8 days
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Eric Bittle is thirty four years old and in the middle of a divorce when Kent Parson suffers a career ending injury. He buys a plane ticket.
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shortcrust · 9 days
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A horseshoe crab being a home to other sea creatures!
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shortcrust · 9 days
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Every time I hear that new Beyoncé song I think, gosh, I bet Eric Bittle is having a great time right about now.
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shortcrust · 9 days
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It’s okay honey, Kate Middleton’s gone to live on a farm. She’ll be happier there. No, we can’t go visit, but she’s with all the corgis we sent up there to be in a better place.
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shortcrust · 9 days
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for every post on tumblr that is like "the victorians just LET LEAD BE IN EVERYTHING!!!" there is a post on some future social network like "in the new millennium they just LET MICROPLASTICS BE IN EVERYTHING!!!"
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shortcrust · 9 days
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Sorry to anyone this happened to (I would be fuming) but I am howling at EA incompetently creating cursed jewellery by mistake.
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