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royalwildswriting · 5 months

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↳ bucky barnes x reader → ❝sweet dreams❞

summary: nightmares haunt you but when you find out that bucky struggles with the same you want to help him. word count: 1.6k+ tags/warnings: fluff, light angst, a/n: n/a

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prequel first glance

It felt like everything had changed and also nothing at the same time. A lot had happened, you were kidnapped and you learned that your boyfriend was actually one hundred and six years old and had been brainwashed into being an assassin. For most people that would be a deal-breaker but finding out had only deepened your relationship.

Of course, he had explained it all when you were on pain meds so you had asked for more details later. A part of you still felt prying when you asked about anything, you made it clear that he didn’t have to answer anything he didn’t want to and he promised he would let you know if he didn’t want to tell something but you still were hesitant.

Your relationship with Bucky was nice, things were still the same; he texted you during your shift, read books with you at your apartment, took you on nice dates when you wanted to get out. The biggest difference was he would spend the night sometimes, during your recovery he had spent a lot of time at your place waiting on hand and foot for you. It was clear his guilt over your kidnapping was not going away anytime soon no matter what you said to him.

It was nice having Bucky with you at night, you weren’t sure if you could handle being alone after what had happened and you found yourself asking him to stay past your recovery time. Bucky was more than happy to oblige.

A part of you thought you were handling things well all things considered but then the nightmares started. It was the first night you had spent alone, you woke up in a cold sweat in the dark. You turned the lights on and didn’t sleep for the rest of the night. The time’s Bucky spent the night you didn’t have them, it made sense. His presence was a comfort and you felt safe, you were safe, you had seen how dangerous Bucky was and you doubted there were many people who could get past him. It had been a few nights since he had been over, you had barely slept.

Now, yes you could have just asked him openly to spend the night but you were too shy to ask so you found yourself inviting him over for dinner. You had made him his favorite pasta and the two of you were curled up together on your couch reading together. Your head rested against his metal arm, your arm wrapped around it pulling it close. You had noticed how shy he was about his arm at times, even since you had seen it he still usually kept you at his right side. Sure a part of this was probably because he was right-handed but you wanted to make sure he knew that you loved all of him.

“I should probably get going, it’s pretty late.” He said.

“Babe,” You whined. “You should stay longer.”

“You need sleep, you look tired.” He said, brushing your cheek with his hand. It shouldn’t surprise you that Bucky had caught on to how tired you were, he was observant.

“Can you spend the night?” You asked. It was a lot easier to ask when you were on pain meds, it had slipped out of your mouth without thinking the first time you had asked.

“Of course, if you want me to.” He said.

“Only if you want to, you don’t have to.” You said sheepishly.

“I always want to be with you.” He said a small warm smile on his face.

The two of you got ready for bed and you found yourself in a familiar place, curled up in Bucky’s arms. The sense of comfort and safety washed over you, your head resting against his chest, his hand running through your hair.

Bucky leaned down giving you a kiss goodnight and you drifted off into sleep. Your theory of not having nightmares while Bucky was around was quickly squashed.

You woke in a familiar cold sweat, heavy breaths leaving you as your heart pounded. This time you weren’t alone. Bucky’s hands gently brushed against your skin, his voice low and gentle.

“It’s okay, I’m right here.” He said. You looked at him, his face illuminated by the light streaming through the window. His brown eyes always a comfort. You hugged him tightly, pressing your head into his shoulder. His arms wrapped tightly around you. The panic from the all too real dream faded away a lot quicker with Bucky around. Usually, you found your heart pounding until the sun rose and you got out of bed but with Bucky, the fear melted away so quickly.

“Thank you.” You said.

“This is why you’ve been so tired.” It was more of a statement than a question.

“Yeah, the past couple of nights I keep having the same nightmare.” You admitted. Bucky’s hand ran through your hair softly.

“I’m sorry.” He said.

“Don’t apologize.” You said leaning back. You noticed that Bucky didn’t look groggy at all. “Were you awake?”

“Um, yeah.” He admitted hesitantly. “I have a hard time sleeping in a bed.”

“Oh.” You said. You had heard of veterans not being able to sleep in a soft bed after getting used to uncomfortable places. You hadn’t considered Bucky felt that way. “Is that all?”

“I-” He said, taking a pause. “I’m worried that I might hurt you in my sleep.” He admitted.

“Oh, Bucky.” You said cradling the side of his face with your hand. “I trust you.”

Turning on the lamp beside your bed you got up, going into your closet you grabbed a big fluffy comforter. Spreading it out on the ground you returned to your bed grabbing some pillows and tossing them on the ground.

“C’mon.” You said, pulling the comforter off of your bed. You turned off all the lights except for one leaving a dim glow. You nodded towards the floor.

“You don’t have to do this.” He said.

“Wouldn’t you do the same for me?” You asked. Bucky had nothing to say. Sighing, he stood up following your lead as you sat down on the blanket. Bucky laid down and you laid with him, resting your head on his shoulder.

“I have a hard time sleeping.” He said you looked up at him.

“Tell me about your childhood.” You said, hand running through his short hair. “What was it like growing up back then?”

“I had three sisters, I was the oldest. My parents died when we were young. I grew up in Brooklyn, Steve Rogers was my best friend. We helped each other through everything. The war broke out and I was drafted. Steve was obsessed with enlisting but he couldn’t, he had a bunch of health problems. He wouldn’t have lasted a second. I told him I enlisted, I guess I thought it sounded better. I didn’t want to go to war.” He said. “I was captured but Steve saved me and hundreds of others. He had been given the super-soldier serum and was strong. After that they let him start doing missions and I was part of his squad.”

“I’m starting to realize if I had paid any attention in history I probably would have realized who you were a long time ago.” You joked. “Although I think I prefer hearing it from you than a history book. What was it like though, the good parts?” You knew the rest of the story he was telling and you knew it didn’t end well. Falling to his death, being taken in by Hydra.

“My sisters always would give me the hardest time when it came to girls, I remember going on my first date and they were just all giving me different advice. Open the doors for her, bring her flowers, get her chair for her, it was overwhelming. I’d come home and they’d all want a play-by-play of how it went.” He explained as you softly ran your hands through his hair.

“Ahh, well they trained you well I can attest to that.” You smirked at him, he looked down at you with a soft look in his eyes.

“Steve liked to draw, we would go to the park and he would sketch the landscape of the animals there. I didn’t like it at first but it grew on me. It was so peaceful and quiet.” He said. “Sometimes, when a park is empty it’s easy to feel like I’m back there. No war, no problems, just a simple life.”

“I can’t imagine adjusting to another century.” You said.

“It’s odd but I don’t hate it.” He said. “It has a lot to offer. Like you.”

“Is that what your sister’s taught you to say.” You teased. Bucky laughed.

“What was your childhood like?” He asked.

You wracked your memory for the cute anecdotes of your childhood. Once you had thought of a few you told him about them. It didn’t take long for his breathing to steady and his eyes to slowly close. You continued for a while to make sure he was asleep.

Cautiously you stopped so you were sure he was actually asleep. Even though he was asleep you still played with his hair softly. You nuzzled into his chest, closing your eyes. It didn’t take long for sleep to find you.

Sunlight streamed through your windows, you lazily opened your eyes to find Bucky still asleep. The both of you had slept through the night with no interruption. It felt like a win.

Bucky looked so peaceful you didn’t want to wake him so instead, you opted to watch his peaceful expression from your place resting on his chest. You were glad you could help him get a good night’s sleep and you hoped it would be the first of many for the both of you.

taglist: message if you want to be included :)

#marvel x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #marvel #my writing #fluff #comfort

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royalwildswriting · 5 months

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↳ bucky barnes x reader → ❝first glance❞

summary: bucky is a regular at the coffee shop you work at and you find yourself enamored with the mysterious man. as you get to know him you realize he has secrets he’s not ready to reveal but that doesn’t mean others won’t. word count: 5.3k+ tags/warnings: fluff, angst, strangers to lovers a/n: this is a fic from my ao3, i decided to repost it here to start out this blog. if i'm being honest i don't remember what happens in this story lol

masterlist

sequel sweet dreams

At first glance, James Buchanan Barnes was a normal man. An extremely handsome man but a normal man. That’s what you thought the first time he came into the coffee shop you worked at. You saw a lot of people come through every day but he always stood out to you. He was tall and handsome but he had a look in his brown eyes that pulled you in. It was almost sad, something about him said to stay away but that only pulled you in more.

It was understandably frowned upon to flirt with customers, not that you were the type to flirt with someone in the first place. Even if you did show interest in him you doubted he would return it. So you continued through life normally but you found it was hard to shake the thought of him.

Daydreams of the handsome man that stopped by every morning at the same time and ordered the same black coffee every day were a common occurrence. It was nice to imagine him asking for your number or him offering to walk you home because it was dark out after your shift. If you were feeling really dramatic you could imagine him pulling you out of the street just in time to avoid a car. You sighed as you finished making a customer's coffee. This wasn’t a movie, he wasn’t some Avenger that was going to save you from a perilous scene.

Glancing at the clock you saw it was about time for him to show up. Ten minutes passed and there was no sign of him. An hour later you found yourself worried. You internally sighed at yourself, you knew it wasn��t healthy to worry about a stranger so much. Maybe he was on vacation. Maybe he just didn’t want coffee today. Maybe he was hurt. You shook your head. Just focus on getting done with this shift.

“Welcome.” You at the chime of the bell on the door without looking to see who had walked in. Looking up from cleaning the counter you were surprised to see just the man you had been worried about. Even with the counter between you and him, the height difference felt big. “Oh, you’re late.” You said without thinking. He raised an eyebrow.

“Accidentally slept in.” He explained. “You keep track of all your customers.”

“I’m sorry.” You stuttered out your face warming up. “Just the regulars I guess.” You said sheepishly rubbing the back of your neck. It wasn’t exactly a lie, you did notice when other regulars missed a day but not usually when they were an hour late.

“You don’t have to apologize.” He said. “Perks of small coffee shops.”

You smiled at him nervously. This was the most you had ever talked to him. It was hard to miss how tied he looked, the bags under his eyes. Maybe he should have slept in more.

“Black coffee?” You asked.

“Yeah.” He replied handing the cash over.

A few moments later you had his coffee in hand but a thought popped into your head. You grabbed one of the fresh blueberry muffins. Moving back to the counter you handed him his drink before handing him the blueberry muffin. You watched as he raised his eyes at the sight of the pastry.

“You look like you could use it.” You said. “Unless you don’t like blueberries, I can grab something else-”

“I like blueberries.” He said cutting off your nervous rambling. “Thank you, I appreciate it.” He said with a smile that made your heart flutter. For just a moment you saw a warmth in his eyes that hadn’t been there before. “My name’s Bucky, by the way.”

“Bucky. Nice to meet you.” You said before giving him your name.

You would be lying if you said you didn’t think about that encounter for longer than necessary. I mean how could you get someone like that out of your head. Especially his smile, it was the first time you had ever seen him smile.

The next day you had off of work. You were more than excited to spend the day doing whatever you wanted. Your day was planned out, you had some errands to run but you also were going to stop by your favorite book store and a few other fun things. Your day was going nicely but the last thing you expected was to run into Bucky.

He was easy to spot even in the crowded street. For a moment you panicked, should you say hello or keep walking? Your nervous inner dialogue was interrupted by the look on his face. He looked lost, almost out of it.

Before you could overthink it you walked up to him and touched his arm.

“Bucky?” You questioned. “Are you okay?”

Bucky looked down at you, eyes wide. For a moment it looked like he was taking in his surroundings, almost in a frantic manner.

“I’m sorry.” He said, he sounded stressed out. “I got lost in thought.”

“Don’t apologize. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.” You said.

“I’m fine, thank you.” He said. “Not used to seeing you without an apron.” He joked.

“With how much I work I’m not used to seeing myself without an apron.” You laughed. This was your shot, you weren’t working, you were having a nice conversation with him so far. “I was just about to get lunch around the corner, if you wanted to join me?” You offered. Mentally you high-fived yourself for saying that like a normal person and not some kind of stalker.

“Yeah, I was actually about to ask you if you were free for lunch.” He said. Wow, not only did he agree but he had been thinking the same thing. Maybe you weren’t the most hopeless person when it came to the dating scene. At least not today.

If you thought asking was nerve-wracking sitting across the table from him was even worse. Somehow every topic evaded you as you pretended to read the menu intently.

“Do you come here often?” He asked.

“Not a lot but I do like to come here after running some errands, it’s like a reward for being responsible on my day off instead of laying in bed and playing video games or reading.” You explained, Bucky smiled.

“What do you usually get?” He asked.

“The sandwiches are really good.” You said. “I like the turkey pesto sandwich and you can get a salad or soup with it. I’ve never had anything I didn’t like here.”

You were thankful for the food-related conversation until you could come up with a normal question to ask him. The waitress came over to take your orders, you didn’t miss the way she eyed Bucky. You couldn’t blame her. You did the same thing at work. After she took both of your orders you moved to take a drink of your water but in your nerve-fueled clumsiness, you knocked your sunglasses that had been sitting on the table onto the ground.

“Oops, I’m sorry.” You said reaching for them but Bucky was quicker grabbing them and handing them back to you. His gloved hand brushes yours as he places them in the palm of your hand. “Thank you.”

It’s hard not to wonder why he always wears gloves, you can’t recall ever seeing him without them even on warm days. You aren’t the type to ask pressing questions, especially after barely knowing him. What if he had some skin problem? It would be rude to call him out or make him feel like he had to explain.

“Are you from New York originally?” He asked.

“No, I'm actually from California.” You explained. “I came here for school but then the blip happened. The school shut down, most of the professors were gone. My family was all gone, there was no point in going back home so I stayed here. I guess I lost my motivation to go to school after everything. Then since everyone’s been back I haven’t been able to face my family, five years I had no one. No one had hope,” You paused, it was hard reflecting on that time. “How am I supposed to be the same person my parents remembered me as?”

Bucky stared at you intently as you realized how deep things had gotten. His look wasn’t one of judgment or even awkwardness at the heavy subject, he looked at you like he understood.

“I’m sorry, I guess I haven’t really talked about it to anyone. That was a lot.” You said sheepishly.

“It’s okay, I understand.” He didn’t elaborate but you could feel he meant it. You wondered if he had disappeared with the blip or not but you didn’t want to pry.

Lunch went well, after the heavy subject things lightened up and you found yourself really enjoying his company. You were glad you had been brave enough to ask him.

“Could I get your number?” He asked as the two of you exited the cafe. You were surprised at how sheepish he had asked. He didn’t seem like the type who would be shy. No doubt he had a lot of women after him.

“Yeah, of course.” You said handing him your phone with the contact open. He typed his number in and handed it back. You send him a quick text to give him your number. “This was really nice.”

“I’d like to do this again sometime.” He said.

“I’d like that.” You smiled.

With a bit of bravery and chance, you had finally gotten to spend time with your coffee shop crush. The reality of it was now hitting you. He liked you enough to at least spend lunch with you and offer to do it again. Now your crush felt less like a daydream and more real.

Work was interesting, seeing Bucky had been the highlight of your shift before but now it was pretty much the consistent highlight of your day. Instead of just ordering your encounter with him usually entailed some talk about your day or what book you had read recently. It turned out Bucky was more than happy to take book recommendations which led to the two of you having a good conversation about whatever books he had read. It was nice to not only talk about something you enjoyed but to have something to bond over with your new friend.

Getting a text from Bucky was a common occurrence. Your conversations would linger through the day. You often teased him about how he texted like an old man. You promised to teach him how to text like a normal person one day. It wasn’t rare for you or him to talk about hanging out more but you had been taking a lot of shifts at work and Bucky had his own things going on even if he didn’t exactly give many details.

It was late, somehow your morning shift had turned into working an entire day at the coffee shop which you doubted was legal but you wouldn’t complain about getting some overtime. Closing was always a pain but you finally had finished. You had been complaining to Bucky over text all day about work.

Locking up the store you nearly screamed as you realized someone was standing behind you in the dark.

“I’m sorry,” The familiar voice of Bucky said. Realizing it was him you let out a breath.

“You almost scared me to death.” You said clutching your chest. “I wasn’t expecting to see you.”

“I didn’t mean to scare you.” He apologized.

“It’s okay, I’m not used to closing.” You said. It surprised you just how dark it was around your workplace, evidently, the city couldn’t keep up on their streetlights. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just thought it’s dark out and I know it’s not always safe around here, I thought I could walk you home if you don’t mind.” He said.

It was hard to keep your heart from fluttering at his words. You didn’t think that men thought that way anymore, it seemed most guys these days thought more of what they could get out of a relationship than what they could do for someone else. Not that he was your boyfriend or anything.

“That’s really sweet, Bucky.” You said. “I’d love that.”

Bucky wasn’t wrong, it wasn’t the best place to be at night, and walking home in the dark always made you nervous. One of the reasons you preferred the morning shift. Tonight you didn’t have to worry about that thankfully.

The two of you walked along the sidewalk talking about different things. Bucky was an interesting person to talk to. He had a lot of personality but at the same time, it felt like he was holding back sometimes. Maybe not holding back but like there was a wall. You could understand. After the blip, it was hard to be yourself, more often than not you felt like a ghost of who you used to be. With Bucky, you could feel that person returning.

It was hard to resist the curiosity that burned in you sometimes. What was he holding back? Why did he wear gloves all the time? Why did he act so old-fashioned sometimes? You supposed there were most likely normal answers to all of those questions. He probably went through some trauma like most of the world if not all had recently. You were either blipped and came back to a different world or you had to survive losing the people you cared for the most. Like you thought before about the gloves he probably had a skin condition and him being old-fashioned could be he was raised by his grandparents.

In the back of your head, your head that was filled with too many mystery novels and fantasy stories, you wondered if it all added up to something else. A girl could dream. Growing up with your head in a book really left a lot to be desired when real-life showed you how plain it could be.

Granted you did live in a world where there were superheroes and villains who made half the population disappear. You doubted you would ever dip your toe into any of that excitement. It was probably for the better, you certainly didn’t have any powers and you didn’t think you were tough enough for any of that.

“Thank you for walking me home, Bucky.” You said stopping in front of your apartment building. “Seriously, that’s really thoughtful of you. It made my exhausting day a lot better.”

“Of course.” He said. “Before you go I wanted to ask if you wanted to get dinner tomorrow.”

“That sounds great, we can talk about that new book you got. You have to get to chapter five by tomorrow!” You told him.

“I’ll try and do that.” He smiled.

You headed into your apartment feeling a lot lighter than you had getting off of work.

Oblivious felt like a strong word to use for yourself, especially considering you thought you were quite observant but Bucky was a blindspot if you ever had one. In hindsight, you could see the signs, the slight sound of nervousness in his voice or maybe the way he leaned towards you ever so slightly. The clearest sign was the face he made when you agreed so casually. You had a long day in your defense.

When you opened your apartment door to Bucky standing there in a nice shirt and slacks with a bouquet of flowers it hit you like a train.

He asked you out on a date.

You stared at him blankly for a second. Could you play it off like you totally knew the whole time? Maybe but you were wearing jeans and a shirt and it felt hardly appropriate.

“I’m realizing that I may have misinterpreted things and I am underdressed.” You said. Bucky raised an eyebrow.

“You mean,” He paused for a moment. “Oh.”

“Yeah.” You said shamefully.

“If you don’t want to go we don’t have to, you can pretend this never happened.” He offered. Bless his heart.

“No, no!” You said shaking your hands. “I want to but can I change real quick?”

“Of course.” He said.

“Here, come inside.” You said pulling him into your apartment. “I’m so sorry, just a second.”

Maybe it was good you didn’t know or else you probably would have spent three hours trying to get ready. The pressure of trying to keep him from waiting too long was a good incentive to pick an outfit fast. You grabbed your go-to ‘nice occasion’ dress and threw it on. It wasn’t too dressy but it wasn’t overly casual. The rest of your look would just have to do.

“I’m sorry, I tried to hurry.” You said. Bucky stood from his place on the couch he had been sitting at.

“You look beautiful.” He said. His intense brown eyes bore into yours.

“You look really nice, a lot more prepared than me.” You laughed sheepishly.

“I’m sorry, I should have made it more clear. It’s been a long time since I’ve been on a date.” He admitted.

“I can be a bit oblivious when it comes to these things, it’s not your fault.” You told him. “It’s been a long time for me too.”

For being absolutely mentally unprepared for a date it went well. Better than well. You loved being around Bucky, talking to him, laughing with him. There was something about his presence that made you feel safe. He was kind and caring, almost too good to be true.

That night was the beginning of something beautiful, you spent most of your free time with Bucky. Most nights he would hang out with you at your apartment and read together, talking about the books and eating dinner. It was peaceful. A part of you was shocked at how easily you fell into a comfortable routine with him. It was domestic but you liked it.

The two of you sat together on your couch as rain poured against the window. You leaned against Bucky as you flipped the page of your book. It had been a few weeks of dating now and you hadn’t yet kissed Bucky. You weren’t exactly sure what the timeline was with these things and he hadn’t made a move and you were nervous. The scene in your book had brought the subject up in your mind. The female lead had finally kissed her love interest, it was dramatic and passionate after a near-death experience. You weren’t expecting that for you and Bucky but you wondered when the right time was.

Tilting your head up you looked at Bucky as he looked at his book with focused eyes. You took in his strong handsome features.

“Can I help you, doll?” He said glancing at you.

“Just looking.” You said.

“Not much of a sight.” He joked.

“I’d disagree.” You smiled. This moment felt perfect, your head resting against his chest was comforting. A light blush dusted his cheeks.

Just like that, the moment was calm and warm and you felt it was the perfect time. You leaned up ever so slightly and he quickly caught on. His gloved hand moved to your cheek, guiding you softly to him as your lips brushed.

After a moment you pulled back taking a deep breath. His brown eyes were soft and warm. You turned, sitting up more so you could go in for another kiss. You grasped his left bicep for stability, as you did you felt him freeze. Instead of the soft give, you expected it was hard as a wall. You tried your best not to react and went in for the kiss.

Your mind raced to try to understand what you had felt. Did he have a prosthetic arm? Was that why he wore the gloves to cover it up? You were glad that you didn’t bring it up. If he was self-conscious about it you weren’t going to make him feel like he had to talk about it. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to know but you respected his privacy too much to be nosey.

Bucky went with your ignorance and you never questioned him. He would tell you when he was ready and you wouldn’t force it.

More time passed and while the questions you had were in the background of your mind you never pushed. You loved what you had with Bucky and you wouldn’t ruin it.

It was nice falling into the rhythm of life with Bucky. It was comfortable. The last thing you expected was for things to be shattered.

See you later ;)

You shook your head with a laugh at Bucky’s text. He was using emoticons which was a step up from nothing but he still texted like an old man and you wouldn’t stop teasing him until he did.

The two of you had a date planned later, you were looking forward to getting dressed up and going out with him. Your shift was almost over and then you were free.

This time you had planned out a whole look, you had even gotten a dress for the date. It was modern with a vintage inspiration. Taking your time to do your hair and makeup you were going to look good tonight.

Bucky had sent you the address but told you that it was a surprise. You could look up what the place was but you didn’t want to ruin it. It wasn’t far from your apartment so you decided to walk. The night was nice and you found yourself with a pep in your step on the way there.

It happened so fast. A car pulled up and two men hopped out. Before you could do anything they grabbed you and dragged you in. You struggled against them but a cloth was put over your face and everything faded to black.

Waking up you found yourself in a dark room. You felt sore, hands bound behind your back, and stuck to a chair.

“You’re probably confused.” A voice said. “Why would a nice girl like you end up in a situation like this. Maybe it’s just the wrong time, the wrong place. It’s not.”

“Who are you?” You asked, voice raw.

“That doesn’t matter. You should be asking who your boyfriend is.” He said. How did Bucky have anything to do with this.

A light flickered and a projection lit up the wall. Surveillance footage shown on the screen.

“You’re probably thinking you found a nice guy. No secrets, no skeletons in his closet but you haven’t.” He said.

The video continued to play, it was hard to make out what was happening. A man ran on the sidewalk, it looked like he was being chased. It was almost a blur the way the figure entered the scene. In all black, this man grabbed the other man by the throat and pinned him against the wall. The man struggled before going limp.

The screen cut to another scene, a hotel lobby, a man running, the same figure in black again with a gun. The man fleeing dropped dead as a shot rang out.

It kept going, people being killed by this man in black with long hair and a mask. You were confused, why was this being shown to you. Who was this man?

The next video was close, it looked more recent than the other ones. The camera was in a point of view perspective. The man in black approached, his left arm was made of shining metal. The man struggled with the assassin before he took a hit, the black mask falling off.

“No.” You breathed out. The assassin’s face was familiar to you, it was your boyfriend. It was Bucky.

“This man has killed countless people, killed my family.” He said. “I’m going to make him pay.”

“He wouldn’t, he’s not like that.” You said, tears burning in your eyes. Bucky wouldn’t, he was so kind. Your Bucky couldn’t do that. “He couldn’t.”

“He did.” The man said. “Should I play more, how much will it take to make you realize.”

“Please don’t.” You cried, your head hanging down. You couldn’t stand to see anymore. You couldn’t believe this.

“It doesn’t matter.” He said. “He’ll be here soon no doubt. I wouldn’t want you looking unscathed.”

The man approached you before hitting you across the face. The pain burning in your cheek tried to distract you from what you just found out. How could that be your Bucky? Another strike across the face.

“I can’t kill him but I can take away the one thing he cares about.” The man said.

“Please don’t kill me.”

“I’m not going to kill you, that would be too easy. No, the pain of the woman he cares about hating him for the monster he is is the best revenge I could ever have.”

It felt like forever, the man had hurt you no doubt leaving bruises and cuts all over you. You didn’t know if you could feel any worse both inside and out.

A loud crash brought you out of your miserable state. Your head felt dizzy from pain as you tried to look around. Noises continued until the door slammed open revealing Bucky. He caught sight of you and rushed to your side.

“Doll, are you okay?” He asked, his voice sounded so small and scared. Your blurry eyes tried to focus on him.

“Bucky.” You said. A part of you was relieved to see him, to have his strong hands on your arms. The comfort that washed over you was quickly replaced with the ice of remembering what you had learned. You were so tired mentally and physically all you could do was cry.

Bucky untied you, as he did the man who had planned this all entered.

“You must be thinking you did it, you saved the girl in time before something terrible happened.” He said. “But you’re too late. She knows who you really are now and nothing you can do will ever change that.”

Bucky’s eyes widened, quickly understanding what he was saying. He didn’t hesitate in taking the man down, handcuffing him, and leaving him on the ground. He returned to you, kneeling in front of you.

“Doll, I have a lot to explain if you’ll let me but I need to get you to a hospital first.” He said. You nodded weakly, too tired to do anything else. Bucky carefully gathered you in his arms, arms that had killed so many people. He walked the both of you out.

While your injuries were painful, they weren’t severe. You didn’t have a concussion or any permanent damage. You were bandaged up, prescribed some pain pills, and sent home.

Bucky took you home and you wondered what could possibly be explained about what you had learned. Had he been killing people all this time? Was that what he was doing when you weren’t with him. How could you be so blind?

Bucky helped you into your apartment and settled you on the chaise lounge part of your couch, fluffing the pillows around you before going to the kitchen. He returned with some toast, a glass of water, and your pain pills.

“I can explain everything now or you can get some sleep first. Or I can walk out that door and never come back if that’s what you want.” He said.

“I want to know. He showed me videos. It was you but I can’t believe it was you.” Tears started to well up in your eyes again.

“It is but it also isn’t.” He said sitting down carefully by you but not close as he usually would. “It’s a really long story and it’s going to sound unreal but I promise you it’s the truth.”

“Okay.” You said.

“I was born in 1917, I was best friends with Steve Rogers. When he became Captain America I worked side by side with him. When we were on a mission I fell from a train in the mountains to what people thought was my death. Hell, I thought it was my death until I woke up in a lab. I was turned into a super-soldier by Hydra and they brainwashed me into being an assassin. They froze me and every time they needed something done they brought me out to take care of it. I’ve killed a lot of people, good and bad. It wasn’t my choice but it was me.” He explained.

You stared at him blankly. Your boyfriend was one hundred and six years old and a former brainwashed assassin. That wasn’t what you were expecting. And he was friends with Captain America.

“So is Steve Roger’s really on the moon?” You asked. Bucky’s serious expression broke as he let out a loud laugh.

“I give you all that and that’s what you have to ask?” He laughed.

“Felt like the safest question.” You said.

“I was expecting something like, are you still brainwashed or why didn’t you tell me.” He said.

“That felt a bit rude.”

“I lied to you about my past and you’re worried about being rude.”

“You didn’t really lie, just didn’t tell me everything. I can understand why it’s a bit heavy for a first date.” You said. Bucky gave you a soft smile. “The way you avoided the Steve question makes me think he’s on the moon, to be honest.” Bucky laughed.

“He’s not on the moon,” Bucky answered. “How can you be so casual about this.”

“Well first of all I’m on pain meds, second I didn’t want to believe what he told me. What he showed me.” You said. “I couldn’t believe that was you but it wasn’t you. If you were brainwashed that wasn’t you.”

Bucky stared at you in disbelief.

“Just like that.” He said.

“I’m not saying that I don’t have any questions or I’m not still a bit shaken but Bucky, I love you. You’re an amazing man and it’s going to take more than that to scare me away.” You said.

“If that doesn’t do it then I think you might be unscarable.” He said. “I love you too, more than I thought was even possible.”

Bucky leaned in for a soft kiss, his gloved hand brushing against your cheek. You melted into the kiss. Once he leaned back you touched his left arm, hand sliding down to his hand.

“Can I?” You asked, touching the top of the glove. He nodded softly. You pulled the glove off to reveal the black metal arm. You reached to the top of his jacket for the zipper looking into his brown eyes for another ‘okay’. You zipped it down sliding it off. The arm was amazing, the gold detail was intricate. “It’s beautiful.” You said looking up at him. You slide your hand into his, intertwining your fingers with his.

Bucky couldn’t resist leaning in for another kiss overwhelmed with emotion for you.

“I love you so much.” He said against your lips.

“I love you too. All of you.” You said.

After the intimate moment, you found yourself overcome with drowsiness. Bucky noticed this and helped you to your bed, getting you comfortable.

“Please stay with me.” You asked.

“Okay.” He said sitting down on your bed. You leaned over pulling tugging at his arm.

“Can you hold me?” You asked.

“Oh.” He said. Getting into bed with you, you didn’t hesitate to curl up on his chest. He wrapped his arm around you pulling you close, resting his head against you.

“Thank you, for everything.” You said.

“I should be apologizing.” He said.

“It wasn’t the best of circumstances but I’m here with you and I feel even closer to you now. I see that as a win.” You explained.

“I love you.” He said again. “Sleep now, I’ll be right here. You’ll be safe with me.”

“My hero.” You said as you nuzzled into his chest.

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#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier #winter soldier x reader #my writing #marvel #fluff #marvel x reader #light angst

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