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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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these tears, they carry,
the heaviness of your name.
and so choking on them,
and letting them out,
hurts just the same.
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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“Why shouldn’t we, so generally addicted to the gigantic, at last have some small works of art, some short poems, short pieces of music […], some intimate, low-voiced, and delicate things in our mostly huge and roaring, glaring world?”
— Elizabeth Bishop (via femme-underground)
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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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“During the Age of Silence, people communicated more, not less. Basic survival demanded that the hands were almost never still, and so it was only during sleep (and sometimes not even then) that people were not saying something or other. No distinction was made between the gestures of language and the gestures of life. The labor of building a house, say, or preparing a meal was no less an expression than making the sign for “I love you” or “I feel serious”. When a hand was used to shield one’s face when frightened by a loud noise something was being said, and when fingers were used to pick up what someone else had dropped something was being said; and even when the hands were at rest, that, too, was saying something.”
— Nicole Krauss, The History of Love (via soracities)
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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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It isn't completely an insane concept to outgrow people as you, yourself, grow. You are allowed to want change. You are allowed to want different things, even if they're drastically different, than the ones you have right now. You are allowed to dislike a human you once loved and you're allowed to fall in love with someone you never saw yourself with. The bottom line is, your life and everyone in it, is allowed to change. How you handle this change, how you communicate this change is largely on you. But you don't have to stay away from change because it's morally wrong. You have just this one life, make choices that enrich it, not those that limit it.
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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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The universe let you exist in same time as me — could anything be more rewarding?
"Oh but could anything be more punishing?"
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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I want to feel this desperation in my bones, I want to crumble at the very sight of your eyes, I want to tear apart the sun, I want to drown in tears that I cry — I have been saved far too many times, I want to know what hurting feels like.
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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This anxiety hangs like a constant noose around my neck — not tight enough to kill me, yet tight enough to not let breathe.
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 3 years
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I know about loss. I know how it sits in the corner of the doorway and tries to trip me while I try avoiding it. I know how it still manages to trip me over anyway, because it has the element of surprise. I have made my peace with the fact that I'll never know when it might show up next. I know about loss. And suffering. And irreplaceable pain. I know about holding happiness one moment and watching it turn to dust. But I don't have wise lessons to teach you. I don't have quick fixes to reduce your suffering. I can't offer you anything more than mere words of comfort and a shoulder to lean on. Because there is one simple thing I have learnt about loss — other's knowlege of it, doesn't erase yours.
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 4 years
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People don't owe you their better side. They choose to be the best possible versions of themselves around you. Kindness is a choice.
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prajakta-writes · 4 years
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There is a guilty satisfaction in not remembering the color of your eyes or the sound of your name. It gives me hope that things, no matter how well learnt by us, still stand a chance of being forgotten.
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 4 years
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for some we tear ourselves apart / for some we merely play our designated part / some linger in our memories / amidst things they taught / while some stay as reminders of things to be avoided / deep within our hearts //
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 4 years
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She is more than the words you describe her with. More than your metaphors. She is someone who enhances the beauty of words, not someone who can be encapsulated in them.
—prajakta
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prajakta-writes · 4 years
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disheveledd clothes / eyes drained of all hope / trembling hands / I stand in front of you / do you remember a desolate night / the night I embraced all broken parts of you / you don't seem to remember me / is it disgust or repulse in your eyes I see / is it for me / perhaps I am a wrong judge of people / perhaps I carry too many expectations / my mother had long ago told me the truth / everyone will uphold the moral of saving / as long as they don't have to step up to save you //
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prajakta-writes · 4 years
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We have nothing left to lose, nothing left to forgive, nothing to repent for, nothing that needs our saving. And yet, we carry this heaviness in our hearts. Oh and how in a world full of nothings, we manage to keep it beating.
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prajakta-writes · 4 years
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I don't care for the hurt nor for the tremble of my breath each time I attempt to call out your name; for nothing shall ever compare to the shattering of my heart, over and over again, knowing it has lost you forever, knowing that it shall never dream to be even remotely close to happiness again.
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