notwhatiam

[notwhatiam]

i want vox to post the cringe compilation

[notwhatiam]

I don’t have an explanation, but here.

#Vox frequently wrecks his systems by crying and the other Vs have to put him in rice

[notwhatiam]

yeah

[notwhatiam]

found out today that Weird Al was almost Lucifer's VA and promptly lost my mind. Hell's Greatest Dad was almost a polka and im so upset about the fact that i can genuinely still HEAR the polka inspiration in it

#excuse me #EXCUSE #ME #HE WAS ALMOST W H A T #honestly if that had happened I would have never been able to get over it #but it might have ruined the whole show for me #because I’d never be able to focus on ANYTHING else #no thoughts just Weird Al Lucifer

[notwhatiam]

this Conversation pit is ruining my life

[notwhatiam]

First time chatting with the crew is very overwhelming, Luci would prefer lighter conversations.

*first art post with my new name!

#just another introvert at a party hanging out with the cat

[notwhatiam]

new radiostatic couple's matching outfit idea: vox is the delivery boy and alastor's the fucked up cat thing who loves cardboard boxes.

[notwhatiam]

no one will believe what u saw, Luci

#okay I now need the first time he drops his smile to be when the two of them are alone together #and he just stares Lucifer in the eyes and goes completely stone faced for like 5 seconds and walks away #I fully believe that he’d be willing to do it purely in the interest of tormenting him #‘why are you telling me this?’ ‘because no one will ever believe you’ energy

[notwhatiam]

More stories from hell (retail) today I was ringing up this lady and she goes oh I want to do part of this on a gift card and the rest on normal card and I go ok and then she hands me a folded piece of paper. I think oh OK it must be folded around the gift card, right? Wrong. It is a folded sheet of 8×11 printer paper with "$40" written on the inside in ballpoint pen. I go what is this. She says a gift card. I say this is not a gift card. She says yes it is. I say this is a piece of paper with "$40" written on it. She says "well it's a gift card." I say it absolutely is not. I am grinding my teeth. She says well I want to use it. I say you physically cannot do that bc it is a piece of paper. I cannot scan or swipe it. I apologize, as if this is my fault, and not because she is completely insane. I hate it here

#I work at a bookstore #and once this notoriously bonkers customer came in #demanding that she be able to return a wrapped book #(which is already weird because… if it’s still wrapped why are you returning it?) #and when we peeled the paper off #we discovered that it was not in fact a book #but a box of chocolate from See’s Candies

[notwhatiam]

cursed cat alastor sleeping with charlie? love your arts so much!! <3

girl_sleeps_with_her_cute_cat. jpg

(yes, he's sleeping. It doesn't look like that, but he's sleeping)

#this is exactly #EXACTLY #how I sleep with Jack #his extremely loud and disruptive purrs even sound a tad like radio static

[notwhatiam]

Alastor doodle page ♥‿♥

#kinda love that top middle outfit tbh

[notwhatiam]

Can TVs bleed?

#according to my friend who used to work in a rage room: yeah they ooze battery acid sometimes #headcanoning that when Vox gets hurt he oozes battery acid

[notwhatiam]

What a lovely little shop. Shame about the horrors.

#Walmart

[notwhatiam]

[notwhatiam]

I want the most agonizing, frustrating, fury inducing enemy to lovers radioapple.

I want them at each others throats, i want them bickering, I want them being petty and doing shit to annoy each other, I want them to be forced into some type of danger that makes them HAVE to work together.

I want begrudging respect and very cunty gratitude. I want the most angry realizations and bitch fits when they realize they’re into the other one.

I want the 5 stages of grief when they realize they’ve fallen so fucking hard and there’s no coming back.

I want avoidance, I want angry ignored other who eventually snaps and corners the avoidant and conflict, misunderstandings, slow burnnnn to lovers.

Please I beg for fic recommendations for radio apple like this lol

#!!!!!!!!

[notwhatiam]

OKAY, LISTEN. I usually have kind of a hard time getting into ship fics, but this one is effectively boiling my romance-repulsed brain like a frog. I don’t know how to deal with that, so I’m just gonna throw this as hard as I can at my followers and run away. OP, thanks for writing this hzckcyoxiswyxicivo

Of Saints and Sinners [Ch. 14]

After destroying the hotel for the umpteenth time, Alastor makes a promise with Lucifer: in exchange for swapping compliments, learning to coexist, and becoming kind of friends, Lucifer will owe him a favour. (Falling in love was not supposed to be a part of that deal.) — in which they fight heaven, each other, and the urge to be together.

AO3 Chapter Links

One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven | Twelve | Thirteen | Fourteen

#hazbin hotel #hazbin fanfic #radioapple #of saints and sinners

[notwhatiam]

“can you people just let friends be friends!!” i shout into the mic. the crowd boos and throws tomatoes at me. “why, are you homophobic?” they accuse. i shoot everyone dead with my aromantic beam.

#good post everyone