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Including the cat.

My latest Guardian Books cartoon.

#tom gauld #writing #oh noooo #ouchie

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can someone please send me that post abt washing your sheets "climb in my brothers"

#socks

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"Melville meant himself. You want to be careful what you wish for. Inspiration means breathing. Fish breathe by drowning."

#herman melville #moby dick #drowning in the air

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I'm just going to leave this here, because this woman said what I've been trying to articulate for ages much more effectively and succinctly than I've been able to

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This is one of my best friends, and the GM for my primary D&D game. Please help if you can, and boost if you can't.

#signal boost!

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My latest cartoon for Guardian books.

#writing #tom gauld #books #what a character #editor approved

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My latest cartoon for New Scientist.

#science #cartoon #tom gauld #cat #space #cat life

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Important rules/tips I've learned as an adult that helped with anxiety

If people are mad at you, it's their responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

If they're mad at you in secret anyways, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

If people don't like what you're doing, it's their responsibility to tell you

If they say it's fine when it's really not, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

People are allowed to be wrong about you

If they are wrong about you, wait for them to bring it up, because if you try to, you will inevitably overcorrect

Some people are committed to misunderstanding you. You will not win arguments against them. Yes, even if you explain your point of view. They do not care. Drop it

The worst thing that will happen from a first-time offense is being told not to do it again. Maybe with a replacement if you broke something

You can improve relationships and gauge willingness to talk to you by giving compliments. It's like a daily log-in bonus and nobody thinks twice about it

Most things are better after you sleep on them

Most things are better after you have a meal

Most things are better after you shower

Your brain makes up consequences that are irrational. If the worst DOES come to pass and someone acts like they do in your head, they are overreacting, and you are entitled to say "what the fuck"

If your chest hurts after you feel like you've made a social error, that's called rejection-sensitive dysphoria. It means your anxiety is so bad that it's causing you physical pain, which is a good indicator that you're overreacting. Tense yourself, hold it for 20 seconds, let it go, then find a distraction

If you're suddenly angry at someone after you feel like you made a social error, that's also rejection-sensitive dysphoria. You are going to feel annoyed about it for awhile, but being genuinely pissed off is your anxiety trying to find something to blame to take the responsibility off your shoulders, and getting scared because it can't justify itself. Deep breaths, ask yourself how much you ACTUALLY want to be angry at that person, then find a distraction

"Sour grapes" is more healthy for you than stewing. Deciding you don't like someone who's perpetually annoyed with you, won't talk to you, etc. makes letting go of anxiety over them easier

If people don't like you, they will find reasons to be annoyed with you when they otherwise wouldn't. If people do like you, they will find reasons NOT to be annoyed with you when they otherwise would. People do not ping-pong between the two

You DO have to make a conscious choice not to think about something. If you're having trouble circling back to it, say out loud that you're done thinking about it and why. Then find a distraction

When you're upset, part of you is going to want to make false bids for attention (suddenly texting differently, heavy sighs, etc. but when someone asks you about it, you tell them it's nothing). Do not listen to it. You gain nothing from it except more misery

People like to help people they care about. It makes them feel good about themselves

If you think you're insufferable for needing help, see above. Yes, really. They get a serotonin kick from it

If you think you're insufferable for mannerisms you have, you either have to consciously choose not to do them, or accept that they're part of the package that comes with you. Being apologetic about existing does nothing except make you more miserable

If you do things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it makes it easier to do them when you hate it

If you avoid things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it reinforces and magnifies how bad it feels when you hate it

Seriously. Read those last two points again. If you can make yourself make a phone call when you've got nothing to lose, you will slowly lose that panic you get when you have to make a phone call you haven't prepared for. You do have to CONSCIOUSLY take that step

Hobbies that make you care for something get rid of that nagging feeling that you're not doing enough. Go grow some rosemary

If you don't engage with your hobbies regularly, you will feel miserable, and anxiety will spike

Hobbies are things that give you a bit of happiness. They do not have to be organized or named to do that. Go be creative in something. Play with coins. Make up lists. Start a new WIP

No one cares what you look like

If people point out things they don't like about how you look unprompted, they are being rude. You are entitled to say "what the fuck"

People who like you will find you pretty to some degree. Minor things about your appearance go completely unnoticed. Literally, scars and dots and blemishes do not register to someone who likes your company

You looking at yourself in the mirror is 10x more closely than anyone is going to look at you

If you're anxious about your body type, and you're creatively inclined, make/write an oc with that same shape. Give them nice things and make other characters love them. Put them on adventures. You'll start to see yourself in the mirror more kindly

You care about wording and perfect lines/colors way more than anyone who views your work ever will

Sometimes when you're upset, you're going to feel like not eating. Do not do that. Not eating makes you more miserable

Same with things you normally enjoy. Denying yourself helps no one. You are punishing yourself for being sad. Stop it

Both of these will take conscious decision to break the habit of. Make yourself do it anyways, and it will slowly get easier

And again, to reiterate: If someone is mad at you, it is THEIR responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

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Mr. Gaiman, I know you mostly get asks about Good Omens these days, but I am a long-time fan. Of your work Coraline. I am a survivor of severe parental neglect and abuse, and I must have read the book hundreds of times in my childhood and I found great comfort in the movie, despite my now complicated feelings about Time Burton as a person. I guess I just wanted to thank you for creating a piece of art that made me feel less alone in my very isolated adolescence.

Do you have any advice for healing after such a traumatic start to life?

I'm glad Coraline has helped. (Tim Burton didn't have anything at all to do with the Coraline movie though.)

When I was young I believed that the way you healed was just to move on. Now I'm 63 and you realize that stuff never heals on its own. It's still there, waiting to jump out at you. But there are things that help: other people help, especially other people it's safe to talk to. Building a life can help. And making art out of trauma. That's good too.

I wished Coraline had been around when I was a child, and that was why I wrote it as an adult.

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Ominous howled rendition of "Silent Night" recorded in the woods at 1AM this morning.

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Why indeed?

My cartoon for this week’s Guardian Books.

Lots more here: www.theguardian.com/profile/tom-gauld

#cartoon #writing #books #tom gauld #but whhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyy

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My first Guardian Books cartoon for 2024

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how does one go about the horrendously long tassk of writing an entire book? asking for a friend

One word at a time.

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My cartoon for this week’s Guardian Books.

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And "Hello there!"

one of my favorite obi-wan things is in the first clone wars series when anakin asks him about why he’s so good with languages and things like that and obi-wan’s response was just “when you travel the galaxy with qui-gon jinn, you learn many things” so honestly knowing both him and qui-gon i’m assuming what that actually meant is “qui-gon dragged us into so much trouble that i had to loosely grasp at least 27973 different languages to convince people not to immediately kill us”

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Mine, too.

My latest cartoon for New Scientist.

Many more here: www.newscientist.com/author/tom-gauld/

#science #tom gauld #writing