mypaperlesstowns

[mypaperlesstowns]

The San Francisco therapist kept telling me I shouldn't be terrified of creative experimentation. "I don't know what's going to come out of me," I told her. "It has to be perfect. It has to be irreproachable in every way." "Why?" she said "To make up for it," I said, "To make up for the fact that it's me."

[mypaperlesstowns]

This probably sounds stupid. I know I'm still young and there's a lot of time for things to happen. But sometimes I think there is something about me that's wrong. that I'm not the kind of person anyone can fall in love with, and that I'll just always be alone. "But I think if I knew someone was going to fall in love with me when I'm fifty-three or something, I think I could wait. maybe. If I knew It would at least happen.

[mypaperlesstowns]

Strange, I don't think of you as mother at all. you are some sort of punishment cage locked around my life.

[mypaperlesstowns]

This is the graveyard where everything I am talking about is, now.

[mypaperlesstowns]

I'm lying down and all I can see is the stars. The hole in my chest breathes like a stupid mistake.

[mypaperlesstowns]

no, because trauma doesn't just go away when someone pretends to understand you. And you say you're fine and I'm okay but can't stand the silence ringing in your head. how many movies and series and books and stupid fucking reels do you need to feel something again? I'm sorry for the 6 missed calls, I read your texts and in my head, I told you everything.

#ritika jyala

[mypaperlesstowns]

when I was ten I asked my mom why I needed to brush my hair when she said appearances didn't matter. stumped her with that one, until she brought up hygiene. remember when I had self-esteem? That was a weird time in my life. At 15, I decided there was no one more cruel than me. Does everyone hate themselves at 15? When I was ten my favorite shirt were my cousin's hand-me-down polos, two sizes too big. I parted my hair down the middle and wrote stories I thought would become famous one day. Had lucky glasses and broom brush bangs, a gap in my teeth and jaw I didn't yet know would be broken. when I was ten I plagiarized everything I wrote. called myself genius, and humble, too. you could see all my teeth when I smiled. I left everything on my sleeve. Didn't know yet why anyone wouldn't.

[mypaperlesstowns]

Perhaps, that's what all human relationships boiled down to: would you save my life? or would you take it?

[mypaperlesstowns]

So many times, love ends in violence. the story ends, but the love of the 'beaten' still continues. We all grew up in brown houses, whispering is our national anthem. When you live barely, you learn to accept the little of what's left, -

[mypaperlesstowns]

The female doesn't want a rich man or a handsome man or even a poet, she wants a man who understands her eyes if she gets sad, and points to his chest and say, "Here is your home country."

[mypaperlesstowns]

What happened to the dream in which you reassured you'd never let go of my hands?

[mypaperlesstowns]

The war will end. The leaders will shake hands. The old woman will keep waiting for her martyred son. That girl will wait for her beloved husband. And those children will wait for their heroic father. I don't know who sold our homeland. But I saw who paid the price.

#war #palenstine #ceasefire #from river to sea palestine will be free #prose #poetry #quoteoftheday

[mypaperlesstowns]

I want to wrap the wind in my arms, tell the earth: Darling, don't worry. It will get better. I want to braid the leaves of the trees, make a nest for me there. I tell the weather, I love every piece of you, even the storms.

#allison leigh

[mypaperlesstowns]

Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything.

#C.w lewis

[mypaperlesstowns]

"Grief is the loss of what we love"

[mypaperlesstowns]

I still forget we're not even friends. I still wake up with things to tell you. This is what the poems are for: telling other people the things I can no longer tell you.

#trista mateer

[mypaperlesstowns]

Can I tell you a secret? sometimes I think I'll never be able to cry in front of you or be able to sing you my favorite song or tell you how the stars make me feel. I'm afraid of you taking parts of me and never returning.