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I'm home 😮‍💨

Let's try not to dream about 80s cult leaders, serial killers or the Antichrist tonight

#my dream #my dreams #quirky dream #quirky dreams

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No but I have a few names for you if you wouldn't mind 😢

Jake why are you bloody giving me a gun out of nowhere-do you want me to kill someone???-

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I'm getting nightmares that I know are super dumb but they're genuinely distressing me

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Your superiors (parents, guardians, teachers) when you're a kid:

Will you stop mithering me 😤

Your superiors (managers) when you're an adult:

You know, you're not very proactive and it doesn't look good

#trauma #abuse

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Happy St George's Day

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Lemon shark 🍋🦈

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Boomers do this wild thing where you give them a verifiable, well known fact and they call it your opinion.

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Course you can, I'd love that! Let's show the boys that Egyptian mythology is cool 😎

Do Marc or Jake have any habits that annoy you? :)

Ohh.. Well...actually 3 things only to be honest, i don't wanna like.. Hurt their feelings because from what I'm about to say, uhh..

Number 1: just them making fun of the egyptian mythology, well i know they were joking but... I always hit them on the head with the pan well not that hard

Number 2: marc being an obsolete moron literally calling me "kiddo" infront of my boss.. donna.. And jake usually pinching my cheecks

Number 3:....two of them arguing

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I feel that :( ah well, there's a video game I like called Smite where you play in an arena to the death against other gods, I feel like playing as some Egyptian gods tonight :) they have Eset, Anubis, Ra, Osiris OH and Neith, it's good fun

Do Marc or Jake have any habits that annoy you? :)

Ohh.. Well...actually 3 things only to be honest, i don't wanna like.. Hurt their feelings because from what I'm about to say, uhh..

Number 1: just them making fun of the egyptian mythology, well i know they were joking but... I always hit them on the head with the pan well not that hard

Number 2: marc being an obsolete moron literally calling me "kiddo" infront of my boss.. donna.. And jake usually pinching my cheecks

Number 3:....two of them arguing

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I was thinking about "would have had had to have had" the other day

i hate that "that that" is grammatically correct. why is english the joke language

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Sometimes I like taking words and going through the alphabet in alphabetical order to find their rhymes

Queer is a fun one to do

If you like the word “queer” reblog.

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baby, please masterlist

Your dating life had been a range of fleeting moments and one night stands. You thought Santiago Garcia would be no different.

F!Reader, no use of Y/N. All warnings are at the top of every chapter. Set after the events of the film. An incredible slow burn. This does turn into a pregnant!Reader fic, just giving you a fair warning in case you're not interested in that. Basing the pregnancy on my own knowledge, and my own pregnancy, so only accurate to the individual! This is an 18+ series. Minors, DNI.

Part 1 - You're successful, you're independent, and you pride yourself in both. But your friends think you could do with a man. (2k words)

Part 2 - You've had an awful lot of wine this week, and your date with Santiago is going well. Very, very well. (3.7k words)

Part 3 - Santiago will probably be just another one night stand. (2.6k words)

Part 4 - You were just coming down with something, that was all. The flu, food poisoning...or something... (4.4k words)

Part 5 - You meet up with Santi about your news, and it goes as well as you thought. (2.3k words)

Part 6 - You meet up with Santi, again, about your news, and it goes much better than last time. Also, your friends are the best people you know. (2.8k words)

Part 7 - You go to your first OBGYN appointment, and you're thrown a curveball. A huge, unexpected curveball. (4.9k words)

Part 8 - It's time to tell your parents. (4.6k words)

Part 9 - After your disastrous call with your parents, you decide to take yourself baby shopping. You invite Santi. (4.9k words)

Part 10 - It's time for your 12 week scan, and Santi has some things to say about Craig. (3.9k words)

Part 11 - As you approach the middle of your pregnancy, you take Beth house hunting. She has an awful lot of wisdom. (3.4k words)

Part 12 - It's time for your anomaly scan, and you get your first glimpse of the infamous Frankie. (2k words)

Part 13 - Your hormones are all over the place and you're reminiscing about your date with Santiago. (2.7k words)

Part 14 - You and Santiago go furniture shopping for his apartment. You don't expect to be invited to a Halloween party. (3.6k words)

Part 15 - You join Santi at Frankie's Halloween party, and you think his friends are a hoot. (4.3k words)

Part 16 - You wake up in the middle of the night and something doesn't feel right... (5.3k words)

Part 17 - It's your first Christmas without your family, but Santiago makes it up to you. (4.7k words)

Part 18 - It's time for your 'surprise' baby shower (that Santi did not give away at all). (3.8k words)

Part 19 - You're moving out into your new home, and becoming a mom is getting all too real. (2.5k words)

Part 20 - You thought it would be just another dinner with Santiago, but it doesn’t end like you expected it to. (3.3k words)

Part 21 - It's time. (5.4k words)

Part 22 - Holy shit...what now? (4.2k words)

One Shots

Best Buds - Santi tells his friends about the babies. (1.5k words)

Little Soccer Players - Santi receives a frantic phone call from you. (946 words)

#rb for later

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2nd row right pic, POV Steven showing you his bedroom in the long-distance relationship idea I had

Oscar Isaac in Life Itself (2018)

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I dreamt about a new TV show set in McDonald's where celebrities were playing parts. It was a comedy like Superstore, wasn't meant to be a reality show, and lore-wise, none of the characters remotely resembled the celebrities playing them eg. Nicki Minaj was playing a character with long nails and big hair, she'd always be chewing gum and had the attitude of a sassy hairdresser, and she was talking about how she was applying for a role to be a Nicki Minaj lookalike and others were like, girl who are you kidding. Paul Rudd also had a role and he had this big curly afro and glasses, he had a very nerdy look about him.

#my dream #my dreams #quirky dream #quirky dreams

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Jake Lockley + Khonshu

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The colours compliment you really well, Steven, looking dapper ✨️

"i bought a spiderman 2099 long sleeves! It looked so bloody cool! Also layla was the one who pictured me, thanks laylaa!"

-Steven Grant

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I don't know why I bother going to sleep sometimes ._.