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lyn-thoughts · 3 years
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I wrote a thing, and wanted to hear people's thoughts and opinions on it. Give it a read if you're interested. But pleas read at your own risk - it includes spoilers!!!
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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I am an idiot
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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May 2019 Illustrations  ヽ(• ‿•)ノ
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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I thought I was over it........today was reminded of it again.
I think I am going through the anger phrase. LOL.
With what things turned out, it's not even his fault!!! Well not entirely... I don't know what I am angry about...for keeping my hopes up? For hoping too much?
I am an idiot.
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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Call me fickle but I met a cutie yesterday.
Then it hit me so hard.
Why the fuck am I wasting energy pinning for a guy who has no interest in me? Instead, I should love and take care of myself now, so I can be ready to meet someone who will genuinely love me back. Even if I have to take awhile to get there, it will be worth it.
Who knows, he will be around the corner.
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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So I finally got around to read War Horse
7 pages into the book and I am already crying.... I am going to be a mess from start to the end.
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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The saga of getting over someone
So it continues...
I really don't understand why and how someone can move on from their "loved one" in a span of days? Wtf, I never dated the guy and we hung out twice in the span of a month (we texted for like a month prior to that), and I am still nursing my broken heart a month later.
So, as I thought I was getting better, he started texting me again, with very confusing mixed signals. I don't know what to think. I know that deep down inside, I am still hoping that there is some fucking miracle that he might like me back, that there is still a small glimpse of chance that he might want to pursue more than friendship. But then I started to see all the signs that are there.
It's not my fault. It's not his fault.
It's just.... He's not ready for a commitment. In any form. And that's just the way it is. I don't think it's to do with who I am, how I am, what I am. It's never been about that. He doesn't want to have anything more than just a casual friendship. And the shitty thing is he has already told me from the start. But naive as I am, I still hoped. Maybe he might change his mind. Maybe one day he will open his eyes and say, "hey, maybe that is who I wanna date". But truth be told, he won't. Not at least for now, or the immediate future. And maybe when he changes his mind, I might not even be the most suitable choice as a partner for him. And do I really want to be so pathetic as to just sit around and wait for him to come around? Heck no!!!!
I know that he knows that I have issues. Heck, reading back my messages, I think I'm kinda pathetic in some ways. Too...needy...too much trying to please him. And it's so ridiculous because he has an innate way of drawing out all my insecurities and uncertainties and I hate that about myself. Maybe it's a warning sign all on its own. That he's isn't right. Or that I am an idiot for acting in this way.
Why must I feel inferior? Fuck that. I have no need to feel inferior. I am not drop dead gorgeous but I am considered cute and pretty. I am well educated. Funny. Loyal. Sensitive. Sweet. Kind. A good friend. Interesting. Full of talent that I should be honing instead of pining over a guy that won't like me back??
But then healing takes time. It will get better, I am slowly moving along. I took over four and a half fucking years to get over a crush on an unattainable man. I am damn sure I can get over a crush I had on an attainable but emotionally unavailable man. Lol what is it with me and being attached to people who are unreachable?
I think I have issues. But that is a whole different story all together.
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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🌹 Instagram 🌹
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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Getting over someone is way harder than I expected. Silly, considering I harboured a crush for an unattainable man for 4 fucking years. But I only knew him for a month? It's so weird but we had a connection, he and I. I don't understand what that is, whether I overthink the connection but it is there.
Maybe things are for the better now. And I don't want to apologise for feeling the way I did. Fuck, he should be flattered if anything. There's nothing wrong with being genuinely interested in someone and wanting to get to know him. Maybe I came off too strong?
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lyn-thoughts · 4 years
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The irony when...
You dress up for a night out with your friends and your colleagues think you dating.....when the real truth is that you just got your heart broken and you are still trying to get over him.
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