lotrolulz
lotrolulz
A Blog for LOTRO Laughs
A snarky, love-hate appreciation blog for the MMORPG LOTRO (Lord of the Rings Online) - also the home of amusing glitches, situations, dialogue, and other LOTRO related shenanigans. Delivered to you (relatively) fresh from the Landroval and Arkenstone servers. Originally from Elendilmir. RIP, Star of Elendil. May you shine forever in the digital wasteland to which you have been banished.
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lotrolulz · 28 days ago
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Is it bad that this is kind of how I live my life everyday? Grab a utensil of some sort, half-assedly inspect it, then,  “WHATEVER it looks clean enough.” 
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lotrolulz · 29 days ago
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CHECK OUT MY POSSE EVERYONE. My herd of dwarf friends!!  Lmfaoooooo the way they all come shuffling up in a solid mass of twitchy, spazzy, wtf-ing dwarves. ILOVEIT.
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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........Well fuck me. It’s okay, I didn’t need to feel happy today. ;-;
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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FINALLY A FELLOW CAPTAIN THAT FEELS THE SAME WAY. THIS GUY, HE GETS IT. Even after the changes and buffs to Red Line Captains, heralds are still useless, man. WorthlessMofo indeed... though I am also fond of “MeatShield” or “SacrificialPeon”. 
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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Wow!!! Does this mean I defeated myself!? Ok but seriously this was way too hilarious to NOT screenshot.
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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ITS-A HIM, MARIO!!!
There is just so much that’s A+ about this. Magically levitating on a fence, honking away on a bassoon, literally dressed in fucking overalls like Mario, referencing mushrooms in the player title, and of course being a dwarf. I don’t care what anyone says.. if Mario were in Middle Earth, you bet your ass he’d be a dwarf.  Fight me. 
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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The Couple Hours when Champs Ruled Them All
Soooo was anyone else around in early June of last year (2020)? Did you happen to remember the almost legendarily ridiculous Champion bug that had INSANE exploit potential?  Honestly I do not remember the context around how I heard of it, but I did spot a forum thread demanding, “Take the game down immediately” and clicked on it for shits and giggles.  It was not what I was expecting.
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In case Tumblr decides to be stupid and squish the crap out of that screenshot, the jist is the following. On June 3rd, an update which included a tweak to Champions caused the skill “Champion’s Challenge” to incorrectly interact with an LI Legacy, specifically “Fight On Critical Rating”. Champion’s Challenge is meant to reduce the target’s outgoing damage along with briefly force-taunting. Instead, it was increasing the target’s outgoing damage, based on the legacy’s rating x 100, then - 30.. which maxed out at +859970% increased damage. G O D D A M N.   But since it buffed the target, you might ask, how could it be exploited? Well.. one, damage reflecting skills. Two, sparring another player, who could then take that insane buff and go ape-shit with it. Normally the effect only lasts for 5 seconds, but there were reports that the “debuff” was also bugged enough to be permanent until death/defeat, and that someone could very easily take this into an instance and one-shot everything, “including T5 Remmorchant” which was the latest raid at that point.  I have a champion, but he is parked at level 50 with an XP disabler for SoA instance funtimes, which means no LIs for him, which means I could not replicate this. Buuut thankfully someone provided a screenshot. 
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*snort* ohmygod. Meanwhile here’s my Burn Hot with its measly +74.8% damage. 
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I am really not sure how this got past beta testing (if there even was any...) but to their credit, this was temporarily disabled / hotfixed within a few hours of the forum post. I am not sure if anyone actually managed to use this to any nefarious intent, but personally I found this to be hilarious.  FEAR THE ALMIGHTY CHAMPIONS. Here’s a link to the thread my screenshots are from if you are curious: https://www.lotro.com/forums/showthread.php?680590-Take-the-game-down-immediately
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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Okay Ontamo, when did you become my mother? Goddamn.  That description text though. lmfaoooooo Also, just to spite him, I wore his fucking disappointment with pride, for as long as I could. 
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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HOLY SHIT IT’S THE FUCKING BOY WONDER. HI ROBIN!  Er... Girl Wonder? Elf Wonder? WHAT U DOIN IN THE MORGUL VALE? Also I love you please be my bff forever ;____;
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I MEAN LOOK ITS PERFECT. UHNF MY HEART.
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lotrolulz · a month ago
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HOLY LONG SILENCE BATMAN
SORRY EVERYONE. I sort of forgot that this blog existed.. and took a hiatus from LOTRO, as I tend to do at times. Sometimes I just need a break here and there, lose interest for a while, or get too lonely since all of my original friend/kinship group seemingly quit for good. I have no idea what happened to the other people I hung out with either, as they all seem to have vanished. I always end up coming back eventually, but sometimes it sucks returning to a metaphorical acquaintance graveyard.  That being said, I am interested in being decidedly less lonely. Any folks still following this disaster blog still around who play on Landroval? Maybe we could hang out in Middle Earth together once in a while? >:    Ooor... Perhaps you would not mind / for some reason have a bizarre interest in joining a tiny, disaster kin? I bought a huge kinship island Hall / House some time ago for my fail kinship that is basically just me now. I will not give that shit up until I die, if only out of pure spite at this point. I HAVE DONE SO MUCH BULLSHIT OVER THE YEARS TO KEEP THE SOUND OF SHANKING ALIVE FOR THIRTEEN FREAKIN YEARS. Is it a sunken cost fallacy? Perhaps, but I honestly love the smaller kinship feel. Just not.. THIS small, if you follow me.  TL;DR Sound of Shanking is pretty much just me now, but I have a huge-ass kin hall island and 13 years of fucked up tiny kin pride that I refuse to let go of, BUT am willing to share with similar-minded / niche’d people. Y’know. If you wanted.  ANYWAYGONNASHUTUPNOW and maybe actually post something relevant. 
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lotrolulz · 10 months ago
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There’s something vaguely kinky about this photo, isn’t there? Bondage isn’t really Beregost’s thing, but even he cannot deny that being strung up with spider web while the spawn of fuckin’ Ungoliant comes to eat your ass is a rush like no other. 
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lotrolulz · 10 months ago
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My Ranger Feelings - Amdir (1/?)
And on the subject of fucking Ranger Feelings... you have wounded me to the heart, LOTRO. It was honestly unexpected but thrice as potent and painful to see this apparition during The Trial of Sorrow, which was named most adeptly. Fuck me. Just fuck me.
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Amdir was the first ranger I ever met. Back before LOTRO went free to play, the man/hobbit introduction was different, with Strider being entirely absent and Amdir being the only ranger / main character you interacted with in the introduction besides Celandine Brandybuck and that idiot Sackville-Baggins. He sprung and saved you and the hobbits from jail by himself, faced the Nazgûl alone, fled with you to Archet and managed to organize / coordinate a defense against the Blackwolds and reunite the estranged Brackenbrooks with a fucking morgul blade stuck in his shoulder/chest for at least a day, all the while hiding how sick he was and how horrible he felt because, like all the goddamn fucking perfect idiot goddamn beautiful rangers, they never put themselves before others. All the while Celandine tends to him, and at one point even confides in you that she is very worried about him, but is almost smitten by his selfless courage. “He is so brave!!” she tells you, and redoubles her efforts to mother hen over him. He asks you to gather Athelas, suspecting his wound was poisoned, but in all likelihood he knew what a morgul blade was, and what happened to those injured by weaponry of the Nazgûl. He knew that they feared fire, surely he knew other things.
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Even worse, when Celandine has you gather ingredients to make a tea that always helped her when she felt sick for Amdir, he confesses to you that he cannot stomach to drink anything, sick as he is, but begs you not to tell her that, and resolves to pretend to drink the tea so she wouldn’t know “her kindness (was) wasted” on him. Did he already know he was doomed? Jesus tap dancing Christ, Amdir. asdklfhlasfkhdfkh
Then, when Archet burns, pale as a ghost and nearing 2 full days (at least) with the morgul blade poisoning him, that badass motherfucker GETS UP and charges those Angmarim motherfuckers with you, killing a few of them before the bastards bring in their boss and overwhelm him with the foul magic in that morgul poison. He challenges the head Angmarim, declaring, “You shall pay for your crimes, Villain!” The vile creep replies, “Then come, Dúnadan. End this.” And he tries, but halfway through his charge he screams and collapses, the knife wound sapping his strength. You defeat the Angmarim bastard, but the Cargûl come, overpower you, and abduct Amdir.
If you played the man prologue, you teamed up with some other Rangers to attempt to find and save Amdir. If you played the hobbit prologue, you only find him when it is far too late. In one scenario you get to see the brave ranger who saved you reduced to a monster and are forced to put him out of his misery, and in the other, far more cruelly, you must watch him slowly descend into madness and despair and he loses himself to the morgul poison, and neither you nor your new ranger friends can help him in time.
It still fucking hurts. I loved Amdir. I still love Amdir. I will always love him, and he will always be my favorite ranger. He was the first I ever met, and he so strongly embodied everything that a Dúnadan is and should be. Selfless, brave, courageous, heroic, kind, and a defender of the helpless and innocent. I will honestly never forgive Turbine / SSG for changing the Hobbit/Man introduction and downplaying his significance just to shove in a big-name character. They did him a disservice and it is an insult to his memory.
I will make a post fully exploring my feelings on Amdir and going into more detail about how the ORIGINAL introduction showed what an amazing character he was, but.. f u c k. "Trial of Sorrow" indeed. Well played, SSG. 12 years later and you've managed to pinpoint strike one of my earliest and most tender memories.
I may never emotionally recover from this.
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lotrolulz · 10 months ago
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On the subject of the servers being down / fucked up for over a week at this point... Found this gem on the forums last Friday (7/17). It is kind of perfect.  Pay special attention to that bit that says, “Rumor has it that a lot of other characters are also staging a massive protest.” Mycaptaintotallymightbeoneofthem. More info coming.  Check out the thread, there’s even more now! https://www.lotro.com/forums/showthread.php?681584-A-confession-It-s-my-fault-but-not-really-my-fault
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lotrolulz · 10 months ago
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RANGER FEELINGS
Note to self. Reminder to self. Nagging post to self. I need to flippin’ finish my ranger feels posts, because holy shit I’ve got a lot of them. No better time than now, since the servers are down AGAIN. -_- sklfdhdshfl
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lotrolulz · 11 months ago
whoops kinda just. ran thru all your lotro rangers tag lol. they do inspire a Whole Lot Of Feelings though. hope you're doing well friend!
I will never stop having feelings for my LOTRO Rangers, man. I hope your romp through the tag was an enjoyable experience! You remind me, I really have been meaning to make more posts on these dudes, especially my favorite ranger (Amdir). I NEED TO JUST DO IT. I’m doing pretty well though, thanks! Hopefully you are as well! :)
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lotrolulz · a year ago
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I’ve definitely seen this dude before!! Or at least.. someone very much like him.
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Ok, well.. I saw a dude named Americaa die super tragically in front of me once. But I swear to god I saw this dude.
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FOUND IT. Okay, it wasn’t the same Captain America.. but it was a clone. Or perhaps a distant cousin?
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Very impressed by this guy’s outfit, not gonna lie
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lotrolulz · a year ago
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The LOTRO community on the Landroval server held a memorial celebration for Christopher Tolkien tonight, with an open floor for speeches and song. Fireworks abounded, mugs of ale were raised, and together we remembered a man whose lifelong work in bringing Middle Earth to life was just as important as his father’s. Masterful renditions of classics like ‘Into the West,’ ‘The Last Goodbye,’ and ‘In Dreams’ were performed, as well as ‘Nightfall’ from the renowned Silmarillion power metal story album ‘Nightfall in Middle-Earth’ by Blind Guardian. We all flew our kites in solidarity, and tried to think of this not as a time of mourning, but a time of remembrance and celebration for someone who brought so many of us together. I myself would never have made the friends I did without the Silmarillion, so I am eternally grateful for all the many volumes of hard work Christopher produced during his long life. The celebration was even attended by two LOTRO GMs, a real treat! 
Shoutout to my pals in the Dwarrowdam kinship for enjoying this spectacle alongside me tonight - I don’t know where I’d be without you all!
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lotrolulz · a year ago
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Uhh? What is going on with my shadow? I think it is having a seizure and my shadow-bow and weapons are just trying to get the hell away from all of this, as fast as they can, by stretching in the opposite direction. 
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lotrolulz · a year ago
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MORE PAAM
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I’M SORRY OKAY
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I JUST CAN’T TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY WITH THIS IDIOT HOBBIT. I CAN’T. 
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BUT SERIOUSLY WTF WAS HAPPENING HERE??!?! Don’tmindmejustcompletelyruiningthedramaticmoment LOLOLOLOlolololl
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lotrolulz · a year ago
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The Adventures of Paam!
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I don’t know, somehow Middle Earth is just way more exciting when it is experienced through Paam’s hobbit eyes. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I just cannot take the plight of Arda seriously while playing as an obese tiny person who attacks things by screaming and playing songs at them on his lute. 
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