When you live for what others do and not for what you want and makes you happy, you make your life miserable. Do what you need to do, be who you want to be.
I try not to assume things. I want to listen to what needs to be said and what needs to be done. Words can be lifters or can completely destroy you and keep your head wondering when it’s going to ever be enough? I wish I could just sit and let go of this self negative talk, unfortunately that comes from a validation that we want others to do, in order to hear kind words in our head. That’s what has been told that’s what has been done: go & get it from the outside.
Things that I have never told came out last night. And I feel like I’ve betrayed myself from saying them out loud. It’s been a secret that I have with my old self. Felt like I wasn’t able to be heard or loved; that everything is my fault and that my dreams and feelings weren’t valid. that’s how I spent the majority of my whole life; thinking that I was never enough, that I was left aside, that I had to be the strongest of all, when I only needed a hug.
I am here wondering how does someone who cleans their house looks like? Im literally meaning the appearance.
This girl and I were talking about basic stuff and I said “my left shoulder is sore cuz I had to clean full house on Sunday” and the girls comment was “do you clean?” WHAT THE FUCK SHOULD I SAY?!
Yes I do fucking clean, and do laundry and cook and feed/clean my dog… like what the fuck you want me to say.
I’m at this point of my life where I’m not being antisocial, I just need a break from everything and everyone, so when I know I can have that, I won’t trade it.
Lets be careful with the things we say to others, they might not be having their best day. It’s not like sugarcoating things, but at least let’s be kind, or just don’t say a word at all.