lgbtqcumber

[lgbtqcumber]

[lgbtqcumber]

and for the love of Gd please reblog, I did not tag this with queer tags because it would be selectively biased

[lgbtqcumber]

This is exactly how I figured out I was ace.

realizing you’re on the ace spectrum like

“I’d hit that.” “You… you don’t even know them though??”

“Oh come on, everyone has a list of celebrities they’d totally have sex with if they had a chance.” “Haha yeah ok” *internally* what

“Ya so like for the past few years I’ve felt zero attraction to people I wasn’t friends with first?? Lol what’s up with that”

Why did you have to have sex with them?? Couldn’t you just hold it?? Like pee??

“You’ll meet someone who makes you feel like that someday, don’t worry” “……sounds fake but ok”

“Sex is an important part of a relationship! Everyone has sexual needs!” “….sounds fake but ok”

“Dude that girl is so hot” “I know right?? Look at her fucking eyeliner. Goals. The fuck.” “No I meant like… look at that ass” “Are we looking at the same person are you really focussing on her ass look at how visually appealing her outfit is and dont you dare fuckin tell me that eyeliner isnt fierce as hell”

“Aesthetic attraction and sexual attraction are two different things” *puzzle pieces vERY RAPIDLY FALLING INTO PLACE*

*staring at the ceiling at two-thirty in the morning* i could die a virgin and i would regret absolutely nothing

“What’s your ideal girl like?” “Uh… my best friend?” “Oh cute, you want your girlfriend to be the one who knows you best!” “No I meant I am literally only attracted to my best friend she is my ideal girl please help I am dying”

“We’ve been dating for six months and we still haven’t had sex!!” “Have you marathoned Star Wars together yet?” “Yeah we did that like two weeks ago” “Well what more do you want”

*thinking about an attractive woman* *dissecting my entire personality and sexuality to figure out why I’m attracted to her this time* is it the muscles. Oh my god is this a sex thing. Oh my god what the hell is this. Oh my god what the fuck is the wtf the fuck the fUCK

*Next day* Zarya could punch me in the face while eating me out and I’d let her but only because she’s a fictional character and therefore could literally never do that

*writing fanfic* ONLY CLOSE FRIENDS HAVE SEX BC ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ELSE MAKES SENSE TO ME

(why is that tho. maybe i should look into that *doesnt look into it*)

“What do you find most attractive in a girl?” “Gotta love those strong emotional bonds” “No I meant like what’s a turn-on for you?” “DID I McFUCKING STUTTER”

*staring at the ceiling at two-thirty in the morning again* sexual attraction should be added to the cryptid wikia

“Yeah sex sounds like a great stress reliever and a nice way to strengthen the bonds between you and your partner(s)” “Well there’s more to it than that…” *The Arctic Monkey’s Do I Wanna Know starts playing in my head* “Haha ok buddy”

“There’s more to being ace than just not being interested in having sex or not feeling sexual attraction. In fact there’s a whole spectrum. You may even feel sexual attraction sometimes but still be ace. You can also be gay and ace at the same time.” “…bro.” “Also it’s totally normal.” *sobbing* “…bro. Bro there are words for it there’s an entire list oh my god-”

“-finally.”

[lgbtqcumber]

Play a Tortle cleric who worships the earth, believing that they are a small turtle living atop an enormous turtle, which is standing on another turtle, and so on. Your party members might laugh at Little A’Tuin’s odd philosophy, until they reveal, living on their shell, an insect-sized turtle who also appears to be a cleric and is worshipping them.

[lgbtqcumber]

Concept: Dungeons & Dragons adventure about a reverse evil magic shop. Rather than a curio shop that sells people seemingly innocuous items which sometimes turn out to be horribly cursed, it’s a pawn shop where when you try to sell them something valuable, the shop’s owner might “discover” that it’s horribly cursed while appraising it.

What happens next depends on the curse; either the owner will try to talk you into letting the item go for a pittance on account of the curse, or they’ll refuse to take it outright, and now you’re stuck with this horribly cursed item.

(Of course, in the latter case, the owner does know a guy who can remove that curse for you, and they’d be happy to provide a referral – though you should be warned that his services don’t come cheap!)

[lgbtqcumber]

I can't wait until Twitter implodes and they all come running back to the og hellsite

[lgbtqcumber]

Help us by spreading the news

[lgbtqcumber]

Was watching Cleo's new video... This came to me in a vision

Original meme under the cut

[lgbtqcumber]

Kind of a lilypad. Refrog.

[lgbtqcumber]

Reposting here bc op was a radfem

[lgbtqcumber]

do you see this shit my liege

[lgbtqcumber]

sometimes when i’m feeling a little too happy, i think about how the economy is basically just a made up concept and then i get irrationally angry. like, why do i need money? why can’t i just give my landlord 1000 apples every month for rent? why can’t i buy coffee with a loaf of homemade bread?why won’t Steam accept a bag of rice as payment for Slime Rancher 2? WE COULD HAVE HAD IT ALL, but NOOO WE HAD TO GO AND CREATE CAPITALISM

#lgbtq community #lgbtqcumber #fuck capitalism #fuck the government #fuck you

[lgbtqcumber]

Every night you dream that you talk to a genie, when you wake up you can't remember what you wished for. One morning you wake up with a giant crab pincer replacing your right arm. What do you do?

i eat my arm

#satt-prompt #show and tell time #satt-genie #satt-writing-prompt #show and tell #satt #yummylicious

[lgbtqcumber]

we could have nice things if corporate greed didn’t exist

This is so sad

[lgbtqcumber]

The answer to your question: almonds.

[lgbtqcumber]

every day is either normal, or a traumatic experience. there is no in between anymore

[lgbtqcumber]

i can’t believe that i have to say this, but if you’re a pro shipper don’t interact with my blog. im not gonna bother to explain. you know who you are

#antishipper #anti proshitter #proshitters dni #lgbtq community #lgbtqcumber