l-a-clift

[l-a-clift]

“Oh, but it’s so simple, really! What makes the world a brighter place,” she said. “There’s no guesswork at the heart of it.”

Her friend glanced over. “If you say so,” she replied.

“But it is! When it comes down to it, all we really need from each other is this—

A friend, a lover, even a coworker, whoever…

we just want them to look for us in a crowd— and when they finally find us,

they can’t help but smile.”

[l-a-clift]

“Yes— yes, I know,” she sighed. “It’s all over. And long past.”

“But look, there… can’t you see?

How the memories still linger in the doorway.”

[l-a-clift]

“I think time is a feeling, really,” she said.

Her friend almost laughed. “Wait. You’re serious?”

“Sure. It’s the longing for the future plans we have, aching for the way holidays used to feel— hoping for a better day today than yesterday.

It’s finding old photos of our parents and wondering if we would have been friends at that age. Seeing an old movie, and finding out it was your favorite actor’s last film.

It’s the little shocks along the way that break us down. The compliments from strangers that keep us going.

Time is how we move through the world— always changing, always the same.”

[l-a-clift]

“I don’t know,” she said. “If I met my past self, even from only five years ago— I don’t know what I would say.”

“Why not?” asked her friend.

“It’s bizarre . I look at old photos, and we look almost the exact same. But I barely recognize her at all… who I was.

I’ve just never been very good at talking to strangers.”

[l-a-clift]

“Don’t say it’s just a book,” she said. “Good books are like mountains.”

Her friend almost laughed. “What do you mean?”

“Well. Stories are so much more than a way to pass the time. They take you on a whole journey, and once you get to the end— you’ll suddenly break through the trees

and find a new perspective.”

[l-a-clift]

“It hurts to admit it,” she said. “That I wasn’t enough.”

Her friend sat up. “Don’t say that—“

“It’s true! It is. I know that, at least. And I want them to be happy— truly. I can see now that they are.

Sometimes, wanting the best for someone you once loved…

means being the person who is left behind.”

[l-a-clift]

“It will take the time it takes,” she said. “You must be patient.”

Her friend glanced over. “But what if everything I want passes me by and I’m left waiting?”

“Listen. Take a moment and look around you. We live in a world of glaciers and redwoods and drifting continents.

The sun will take its hours, the moon will take its course, and the seasons will change.

People have decided time moves quickly and so should we. But our world is on a steady path— my dear, let yourself slow down.”

[l-a-clift]

“Isn’t it strange, how even when we are very young, we learn to be exactly what we are not?” she said.

“How do you mean?” asked her friend.

“If we’re hurt, or in love, or terribly sad— our first instinct is to hide it. To act like we are always doing fine, that we do not bruise or scar so easily in life.

But it only takes the smallest slight, as insignificant as a paper cut, even— to wound, and to bleed.”

[l-a-clift]

“Why else would they say love is like being hit with an arrow?” she said.

“That’s just it,” replied her friend. “It’s an old myth.”

“You can’t believe that! Myth is the memory and wisdom from our collective past.

Haven’t you ever turned to find someone you love- and when you’ve lost them for a moment in the crowd- your heart pinches and bursts?

The arrow in the heart isn’t something we feel when love begins. It’s the fear of losing it.”

[l-a-clift]

“Well, then- I’ll be the one to tell you that letting go isn’t always the answer,” she said.

“But isn’t that the only way to move forward?” asked her friend.

“Of course not! There is no ‘only way’ for anything. So hold on! Hold those memories tight, forge them within your heart, and let their fire keep you going.

No matter what. Keep going.”

[l-a-clift]

“There’s nothing wrong with reaching for your wildest dreams,” she said.

“But shouldn’t I be content?” said her friend. “Isn’t that the secret?”

“It’s not your fault, really. We are born into a world surrounded by stars— to look up and dream is our very nature.

And yes— we also have our feet firmly rooted among the trees and rivers and oceans— something we must all accept.

The secret is, I think, to find a balance between the two.”

[l-a-clift]

“We’re told to follow our hearts,” she said. “But whenever I really try to look for answers within— all I hear is I don’t know.”

“Well, that’s just it,” said her friend. “That voice isn’t your heart. It’s your mind… and our thoughts are very hard to listen to, sometimes.

Hearts hold a deeper knowing. It may look like aimless wandering through the woods to others, but with every new step, you’re choosing the path— almost without thought at all.

It’s hard to guess the end of the road— but you’ll always know, at least, how to take the next step.”

[l-a-clift]

“I just feel like everything in my life is leading to a goodbye,” she said. “I’ve parted ways with so many dear friends, so many seasons of my life— I don’t know how a heart can take it.”

“That’s just it,” her friend said. “Our hearts are so much stronger than a glass vial that can break. We’re born into this world where nothing— nothing is forever.

Maybe, it seems cruel. But even the temporary can live so long within our hearts.

And doesn’t that make everything, everyone— significant?”

[l-a-clift]

“I think we get to know people like we experience the seasons,” she said.

“How so?” he replied.

“At first, there’s the brilliance of spring— everyone trying to show the best versions of themselves. Gradually, we grow together into a verdant summer of shared stories and memories.

Then— the facades fade into the autumn brilliance of our true personalities. After all, I believe the longer you know someone— the more beautiful they become.

And eventually all of the artifices and walls we shield ourselves with fall away. We’re left with the winter branches of bared souls— and in the comforting stillness of being truly known, there’s nothing more fascinating.”

[l-a-clift]

“Well, isn’t that why we’re so good at hiding from ourselves?” she said.

“What do you mean?” asked her friend.

“It’s easier to close off. If we let ourselves feel something, everything we’ve worked so hard to hold off comes crashing down like waves.

I think it’s one of the bravest things a person can do, to face the storm. Because big emotions like grief and love— they demand to be felt.

Learning to experience…

is learning to be human.”

[l-a-clift]

“And that’s the bitter truth of growing older!” She said with a short laugh.

“It’s just part of it,” said her friend.

“To forget? I mean— I don’t know, think back to how you were as a kid. Before we were told exactly how to be. I think that’s when everyone is their truest self.

It’s crazy! Sure. But we had all the answers when we weren’t even looking for them.

Then the years pass, and we spend all of our time trying to reach this vibrant soul buried so deep— just to remember who we were.

To rediscover who we are.”

[l-a-clift]

“I don’t think discontent is a sign of failure,” she said. “It’s more than that. It’s a calling.”

“But I worked so hard for this. How could I not be happy?” her friend asked.

“Sometimes, even the things we want most, look different once we catch up with them. That nagging feeling that something isn’t right— we can’t just ignore it.

We have to dig it up and break it open. Only then, can we hope to find the truth hidden inside.”