kittyandco

[kittyandco]

5 years

btw i literally had a thought where i watched the sw prequels and started shipping with anakin. the worst part is that i wouldn’t be surprised or put it past myself. i have always been curious about him but like. why. why

#the prophecy of it all #self rb

[kittyandco]

still technically on hiatus for a while, but i'm back to announce that today/tonight is my 5th anniversary with anakin and i'm so happy 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺!!!!!!!!!

i love him dearly and i'm so glad i met him. just when i needed him most. i love him SO much and i don't have any poetry to write in this post, but i just hope he knows how much he means to me and how much i love him. i will never stop saying it. i love him and i can only say it a million and one times

#💕 i don't like sand but i like you

[kittyandco]

on his way to me

#literally though #self rb

[kittyandco]

Revenge of the Sith (2005) dir. George Lucas

#pure cinema this movie is the best 😭 #self rb

[kittyandco]

anakin skywalker + The Spin

#self rb #the spinny

[kittyandco]

Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith dir. George Lucas | 2005

#heehehehe #one of my favorites #self rb

[kittyandco]

#god

[kittyandco]

speen

#transformers #my silly that i made kajjahhjs #i am buying this plush btw he's coming soon and i can cuddle him SOOOOOOOOO TIGHT 😇😇😇

[kittyandco]

liking a character with barely any screen time will have you going through their three (3) scenes frame by frame just to feel something

#SHUT UPPP #IT'S TRUE #me with frozen me with frozen me with frozen me with frozen #txt

[kittyandco]

💐🌷spread the love to the people you’re glad you’ve found in this corner of the internet 💐🌷 (it's nym! I remade)

🥺🥺🥺🥺 thank you! back at you 🥺💖

#asks #❤️

[kittyandco]

finally moving into a place you can call home with your f/o(s) whether it be a house or an apartment… finally getting the keys to said home and both of you feeling that indescribable warmth as you step into your your soon to be filled home. going to furniture stores, unable to resist trying to sit on every soft looking couch (and maybe even playfully shoving f/o(s) to sit on one, or vice versa) trying to picture whatever table chair or bed you can find in the emptiness of your home. going through all the palletes of paint in another store, trying to see what would fit the walls of a room best. shopping for kitchenware and silly mugs and oh, realizing that you get to do groceries with them, even though it may seem like a mundane task to some.

when you guys unpack and get ready for your first night moving in, even with nothing but the possible discomfort of an air mattress or sleeping bags with no bed yet, the thoughts of ‘oh, this is our home,’ enter your mind. the fact that you get to come home to each other, the fact that there are so much memories to be made under this roof is comforting, especially to your f/o(s).

#this actually made me cry #I've been wanting to move out for years but it's gotten worse this past year #and I've gotten further away from that goal rather than toward it #and so sometimes i think about this and i just remember what it's all for. I won't feel trapped anymore #where i can feel like this not only in my dreams but in real life too. i get to take them with me wherever i end up going #i need this freedom so bad #and i'm just glad they're here with me through it all. even when i feel trapped and hopeless #thank you op #imagine your f/o #imagine your self ship

[kittyandco]

posting an image from the Vexen/Even album on my phone everyday-day 47

From the Kingdom Hearts three manga

#umm wow hi 😳

[kittyandco]

shout out to the self-shippers whose f/o is the most unpopular character in their source.

shout out to the self-shippers whose f/o is a tumblr sexyman/tumblr sexyman archetype.

shout out to the self-shippers whose f/o is seen as only a “meme” or “cringe.”

shout out to the self-shippers who give their f/o a textbook’s worth of lore because canon failed them.

shout out to the self-shippers who wish the fandom took their f/o more seriously.

shout out to the self-shippers with f/os so obscure, they don’t even have a fandom.

y’all are the self-shipping community’s strongest soldiers. keep loving! 💗

#self ship

[kittyandco]

between our anniversary a week ago and the new jojo musical i am missing dio BIG. TIME.evshshwjdhbhgcfhhfgd

#i need to finish our anniversary fic #I'M SO PROUD OF PHANTOM BLOOD FOR MAKING IT TO GET A MUSICAL SCREW THE HATERS

[kittyandco]

thank you!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

#asks #❤️

[kittyandco]

not to keep venting about this (i restarted therapy but my blog will do for now), but it's amazing how much one important person in your life can gaslight you about who you are. you think of them or being seen by them and you crawl back into a little hole that you didn't want to create, but you had to. you go around in other relationships thinking you're the worst person they know, and that they're just humoring you out of some obligation. and nothing you do that is kind, that is important, that is fulfilling, that stokes growth, will ever matter.

and this is yet again one of the many reasons imagining myself with hans, but any of my f/os really, is so important to me. it's helped me rediscover the qualities about myself that i am proud of, and even create new ones. i want to be loving and patient and compassionate and helpful and observant, and self shipping has helped so much with being able to embrace those things when i never really got a roadmap from those who were supposed to teach me. when they were already within me.

nd it also reminds me that if the guys i like (derogatory) can be loved... then i surely can, too. we can change together.

i've made UNFATHOMABLE strides in who i am, what i do, and what i think because i have been through hours and hours of self-reflection and learning and curation of the person i actually want to be.

i'm tired of trying to prove myself to those who refuse to listen or see in the first place. i'll always be broken. i'll always be inadequate. i'll always be too different.

it's an uphill battle, but i have tried everything i can think of. i'm loved for who i actually am right NOW. not who i was in the past. not the image of me that was made up by someone else in an effort to get me to conform and censor myself. not for anything egregious, just... being me. being "difficult."

idk where else this is going... i'm just so grateful i'm able to get back up and remember that i'm better than that.

re: my last post about hans

here's another thing that just GETS me about him:

everyone wants to shut him out and they see him as lesser, see him as inherently broken somehow... and he chooses to not only surpass their expectations, but also embrace them, too. somehow. like, after a while, you don't want to prove anything to anyone because you can't change their mind. you do everything they say and try to be exactly what they want you to be. you start to change of your own volition, too... for the better.

but they hold some sort of leverage over you and all you want is to be better for THAT person specifically so they'll see you in a more respectful light.

but they never change how they see you. never stop criticizing. you can never ease their disappointment.

so you start to think they're right... maybe you are defective. maybe there IS something wrong with you. there always will be. no matter what you do, you'll never be good enough. you'll always have their version of you in the back of your mind, and you wonder if anyone will ever love you for who you are... or, heck, even the version of you that you "put on" to protect yourself from this person. because you've been taught that no version of yourself is truly acceptable.

and so you can either carve out your own path... or believe them. sometimes both.

maybe he thinks that there is something different about himself that turns people off... but by continuing to reinforce that, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. but at least it's something they can fear. at least he's going to gain something.

idk if this makes the most sense. i'm just upset and this is weighing on me because i just know exactly how he feels. it's so isolating.

#meows

[kittyandco]

The face Hans makes gives me so much life.

#ME TOO it's so cute #i can't even explain it just the indignance. you know what you did. goober #💕 love is an open door