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kalya-studies · 9 months
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Cellular structures
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kalya-studies · 9 months
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sunday, june 25th, 2023 | 20/100 days of productivity
today's productivity:
finished section 4.5 & now I'm done with module 4! 2/3 of the way done woo
finished the last lab in section 4
did laundry
today's self-care:
slept in and enjoyed my sunday morning!
drank water... it is so hot outside y'all
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kalya-studies · 9 months
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drinking fine grape juice i got as a gift, a Czech film night with myself and writing letters
Monday, the 26th of June 2023
What a wonderful Monday spent reading, listening to lectures about literature, and hiking with the dog. Slowly a new normal is arriving. She is unpacking her bags to stay for a while - at least until the summer break starts and I travel around Europe.
Things on my mind
Lecture on postcolonial writing
Finish reading and annotating How the Dead Dream
Answer work emails
Laundry
Language learning
Continue reading Anil's Ghost
Yoga and workout
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kalya-studies · 9 months
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i think failure is not much talked about , getting full marks , A+ and everything is so glamourised that we forget what it took for us to reach there. We got those 100/100 on our maths exams because we got 60/100 , 58/100 , 70/100 on our practice tests.
If you studied a lot for something but didn't get results , it's completely fine . Do not pressurize yourself and learn from those mistakes 🫶🏼 Life is a series of ups and downs and you're a human , not a lifeless robot 🌷
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kalya-studies · 9 months
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10.06.2023
Two more weeks and I finish my 3rd year in medical school. Can't believe how time flies. I recently bought my first Yankee candle (I always make my own candles but my curiousity to see Yankee's performance was high + I wanted something pride related). Hope you have a fantastic weekend and keep up the good work!
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kalya-studies · 9 months
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day to night
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kalya-studies · 9 months
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i don't know for sure, but i believe the reason this works is because you're being more mindful about the things you do and the steps you take!
mindfulness goes a long way in a lot of mental disorders, because it teaches us to be in the present and be consciously aware of what we are doing and why. eating food without doing anything else (like watching a show or reading the news) and focusing on the colors, textures, tastes of food is one of the best ways to get started with doing this!
I haven't met or seen a lot of people with adhd (despite the nature of my chosen field of study, psychology) but i suspect i might have some traits. so yes, slowing down and slowing down mindfully helps with the blur of thoughts rushing through my head which sometimes makes me dizzy, though i'm reluctant to always follow through with those.
my dear babies who grew up with undiagnosed adhd who are now medicated adults and still struggling, this ones for you.
let me give you a cute tip ok? ready?
you don't have to do things as fast as possible
ok i know that this is jarring to read, but stay with me. you may be having the realization at this very moment that every single task that you have ever undertaken in your life, your goal was to complete it as quickly as you possibly could. and maybe you're medicated now or maybe you aren't. but this has always been your philosophy.
this is not actually necessary and not how neurotypical people view things like tasks or responsibilities
a real life example of how this information has changed the way that i behave and has had a positive effect on my mental health:
i noticed that when getting ready to take my dog for a walk, my primary goal has always been to get the harness and leash on her and get out the door as quickly as i can. for no reason other than i was lead to believe as a kid that faster = efficient = better. however, there are other factors, such as: i sweat very easily and moving around at a fast pace trying to collect all of the things i need to rush out the door exacerbates this. these combination of factors results in me getting highly irritable and overstimulated.
i later realized that this is the way that i get ready to leave the house no matter what i am doing
now, when i am getting ready to take my dog for a walk, i purposefully do everything at half speed. i gather stuff slower. i move through the house slower. i put the harness on slower. i clip the leash slower. i open the door slower. i make a conscious effort to do everything almost in a way that feels like slow motion to me.
and you know what? applying this behavior to almost every single task or activity that i have to do results in me having a significant magnitude less anxiety than if i am in my usual "do this task as if you are racing against an invisible clock" state of mind.
the old saying "slow down to speed up" is quite poignant when it comes to dealing with neurodivergency, especially adhd. even if you're medicated, you may still be consistently making mistakes because you're probably still moving with a level of urgency that is unwarranted. you're not in a race. it's ok to do things using inefficient methods, especially if it is a benefit to your mental well-being.
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kalya-studies · 9 months
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Some time when I was a teen, somewhere a bit before my parents' second divorce, I came to a quiet realization:
Sometimes, when people love each other, they become different people. The togetherness changes them. Sometimes for the better, and sometimes not. And it's not the love that's at fault, or the people, or the change- it's just the nature of things, to become different over time, and if you cling too hard to the image of the thing you love as you first encounter it, you will be blind to the shapes it becomes until one day the new thing tied to your heart is suddenly clear to you, frightening and strange.
I don't know if this was a rational thought, or a true one, but it is the one that I had.
I was seventeen. Close to graduating. And I'd heard enough of people leaving for college, moving away, telling their friends that they would be friends forever, and then becoming strangers instead.
So I went to my friends, so close we were family, and told them, "Whatever happens next, whoever we become, I want you to know that what we are right now is good. Whatever comes next for us, if we grow apart, I want you to remember that now is good. Now is important to me, and I'm glad it's happened. It won't mean less because it's over."
Time has passed since then.
A few, I'm still close to.
Many more have grown apart.
Sometimes I pass the face of a friend on the street, who glances back with the eyes of a stranger.
Their fingers tangled in a stranger's fingers.
Their fingers clasped in a child's fingers.
Their fingers clenched around a broken pipe- dirty fingers.
And we don't talk. Niether of us.
Nerves? Uncertainty? Shame?
I don't know.
We nod. An understanding- an acknowledgement- and the moment passes.
I don't know who I've become to them. I dont know who they are to me.
But I hope they remember.
What we were was important, and it was good, and it doesnt mean less because it's over.
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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When I start a book I’m looking for words that reach out and touch me. Most of the time when I’m looking to read a book it’s usually not about the plot, but rather about the words themselves. Words that leave me breathless.
I wanted to share a few books that make me feel like reading them once just isn't enough to absorb the art presented to you.
1. ’Too Much and Not the Mood’ by Durga Chew-Bose - This book is a collection of essays, and every other page leaves you lingering. The words hold you and are so ethereal at times. As an Indian woman, it was so lovely reading work in a genre that I don't see many Indian authors in.
2. ’Constellations: Reflections from Life’ by Sinéad Gleeson. My relationship with my body is complicated to say the least. I've spent most of my life being ungrateful for what my body has given me, which is the health and strength to simply live. Why is it that we take our bodies for granted until something awful happens? Gleason recounts in this collection of essays and reflections about everything she and her body have endured in her life; pain, sickness, and motherhood. This is such a life-affirming read. The stories are honest and piercing. Gleeson’s prose is exceptional and lyrical. Each essay is a masterpiece.
3. ‘Everything Under’ is  a murky magical novel that offers a fascinating mélange of ideas on subcultures, gender fluidity, fate and free will, and so much more. Johnson’s writing is stunning; her fixation on words is unrelenting and the imagery she employs is mesmerizing. I have never felt so lost reading a book where I didn’t want to put the book down. It took me about a quarter way through before the pieces of the puzzle started to fit and I couldn’t believe what I was reading.
IG:coffeeandbookss
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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6-6-23
Today I worked on my GitHub profile. I don’t have a personal site currently, so I decided to make that my portfolio for now. I really need to start working on projects for that portfolio too..
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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idk when we decided that explaining yourself shouldn't be part of an apology but like. if someone was a dick to me and apologizes but I still don't understand why they did it I'm not gonna feel any better
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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06. 06. 2023
Afternoon grind before dinner. Re-doing my notes in a 1-subject notebook because I learned I don't need a 3-subject notebook and am saving that one for next semester.
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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“Not ignorance, but ignorance OF ignorance, is the death of knowledge.”
— Alfred North Whitehead  (1861-1947) British philosopher and Mathematician.   (via philosophicalconservatism)
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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6 June 23 - easy and quiet work from library set-up
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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@academia-lucifer
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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Cats crowd the harbor on Aoshima Island, Japan, on Feb. 25. | (REUTERS/Thomas Pete)
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kalya-studies · 10 months
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Walks at sunset to compensate academic failure
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