holyplasmaball

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Had a debate with a friend and now I gotta know

please reblog for larger sample size, my friend bet me no one would say Gimli and I wanna prove her wrong

#samwise gamgee #i was in the market for a malewife from a young age

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I saw a post about tumblr user ages...

Reblogs are welcomed for that sweet, sweet increased data pool (aka getting more than 20 responses 😅)

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No one makes Galadriel spooky enough. Like yea I get she’s the most beautiful elven maiden the world has ever seen but she’s also downright unsettling.

I bet she fuckin stares at people without blinking for like a solid five minutes and then when you finally ask her what fuck is up she tells you how you’re gonna die.

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you know i think the funniest thing about sauron/mairon is that he has been described as “fair” 7 times in the book, higher than any other characters including luthien, and she is supposedly the most beautiful woman in that fictional universe,, like somebody actually did a count on it

#science facts

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Thuringwethil :)

#thuringwethil

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me writing the worst paragraph of my life knowing that a sexier, more hydrated version of me will fix it later

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"Was The First Age Worth It" - the greatest thread in the history of the Halls of Mandos, locked by Vairë after 7,050 years of heated debate,

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"for the most part"

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You know what really fucking Annoys Me about internet censorship is stuff like swear words being heavily censored because that's entirely an American cultural hangup being forced on the rest of us. I don't know a single country where swearing is as taboo as it is in America. In fact most languages have swear words that would have the same effect on an American as giving a Victorian chimney sweep a pepsi max cherry.

#perkele my beloved

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halls of mandos tumblr dash simulator

🌟 starstrewn Follow gotta be real i did not have "felagund shows up all werewolf mangled and then immediately leaves" on my 465 bingo card

#lol #king shit ( 321 notes )

💜 growingthings Follow I have to be honest I'm a little exhausted seeing so many blogs here with "kinslayer DNI" in their bio.... isn't that against the fundamentally redemptive nature of death and rebirth and all

👻 bluebirdiestelf Follow op where were you at alqualondë . just asking

( 5 notes )

🌈 sinda_sapphic Following anyone else starting to wonder if there ever will be an "after?"

#or at least anything like what there was before #by elbereth i hope my heart finds its way back to doriath #and yet it grows further and further from me #slips from my fingers as a dream upon waking #reembodiment soon death daddy 🥺🥺🥺??

( 14 notes )

🔮 smokererelfguy Mutuals

#i for one am giving myself impossible bazonkas #they wont let me out because they fear my power

( 1208 notes )

🔥Fëanáro_Official Follow Day 167,901 of admitting no fault.

❄️Finwëñolofinwë Following Ah, this has served you excellently in the past. Carry on. Dig deeper. Why should you do otherwise? Plainly you have been nothing short of perfection.

🔥Fëanáro_Official Follow Day 167,902 of admitting no fault.

⛅ birdsmith Follow TIL i learned you can be dead and still have a maglor feanorion bop stuck in your head :/

🌬️feeeeacalimë Mutuals

#to be clear he's problematic as fuck #but damn if he doesn't have some earworms to offer

( 120 notes )

💎 dwarffucker4000 Following girl are you the doom of mandos because i can't rid myself of you no matter how many times i try to wash myself clean & despite everything i can't bring myself to regret you #eldariel talks!

( 14 notes )

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Such a good prompt I couldn't resist:

People were fraught with contradictions. As soon as one deemed they had discerned the dictates of a soul, one was proven wrong, as the subject of one’s study came out clashing against their own principle in fierce opposition.

Thus did Mairon, too, comport himself, albeit to a lesser degree than most. For Mairon, in his quest for utmost clarity, had ever held fast to his convictions, adoring and abhorring with outspoken certainty. And yet, every rule had it’s exception, and Mairon was not the exception to this rule.

For Mairon had ever harboured an ambivalence toward Melkor’s creations, equally eager to laud and criticize. And nowhere were his warring sentiments as manifest as with Melkor’s serpents of wing and flame, his cherished progeny whom he had come to call his dragons.

Until now, the majestic beings had ever been firmly tethered to Melkor’s renown, with Mairon emphasizing their kinship with such unfortunate titles as Kingspawn, Valarin Slag, and the Bastard Scions of His Majesty the Fool. Yet on this day, as the victory Melkor had long envisioned delivered itself unto them through the actions of his children, Mairon did shift his stance, suddenly employing language far too possessive for Melkor’s taste.

“Our children?” Melkor repeated, his voice edged with a sharpness he hoped would prompt Mairon to stay his quill, yet to no avail. “One might find such a change of heart confusing. To first have my children suffer your disdain for years unnumbered, only to now suddenly have them claimed as your own triumphs on this day of conquest. A confusion, mind you, not confined to my dragons alone, but which has come all too familiar as of late, surfacing as often as fortune favours us. As if you would insinuate that, whenever prosperity graces this fortress, somehow its credit does always attribute to you.”

With subtle insolence upon him, did Mairon nod his head. “Indeed.”

At such brazen irreverence, aspersions cruel and numerous sprang to teeter upon Melkor’s tongue, each slight more slanderous than the last, his mind well honed in the art of verbal degradation. Yet, as was oft the case with Mairon, he found his desire for retribution lacking, as his own rule of inviolability did yet again find its exception.

Quiet they then gazed upon one another, the silence, made soft by the absence of Melkor’s rebuttal, soon growing as unbearable as outright endearments.

This Mairon could not stomach. The sweetness of Melkor’s restraint was to him a gesture too tender to withstand. Flustered, he averted his eyes, and swiftly gathered his sundries so he might flee the moment altogether.

“You are losing your edge, old man,” did he hiss one final taunt as he went.

Melkor cared not.

“And yet, I have won the day.”

Whenever the dragons slay and do well, Mairon calls them as "our children"

Whenever the dragons mess up, eat his stuff or a thrall he still needed, Mairon calls them as "Melkor's children"

#angbang #melkor #mairon #morgoth #sauron #my writing

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"Radagast is, of course, a worthy Wizard, a master of shapes and changes of hue..."

I'm mildly obsessed with this throwaway remark from Gandalf. Like his fellow Istari, Radagast is a Maia in origin, and the only other Maia who is singled out for their shapeshifting ability is Sauron. Radagast is potentially a shapeshifter on a par with bloody Sauron, and this is just never. mentioned. again. Amazing.

(tbh I'm not entirely sure what makes their ability stand out, since all the Ainur seem capable of changing their forms, unless, like Melkor, their power is depleted in a big way. Even Olórin/Gandalf is mentioned as changing his shape in the Silmarillion. But that's another musing for another time...)

But to return to Radagast and Sauron: I wonder if there's any difference in their approach to shapeshifting. On a headcanon level, I tend to associate Sauron's ability with his smithing - he's crafting himself a new form. Maybe for Radagast, as a Maia of Yavanna, his ability is closer to examples from the natural world, like animal camouflage and call mimicry.

And is there maybe a link to the Beornings, too? Beorn seems to know him - "Not a bad fellow, as wizards go". What if it was Radagast who first showed his people how to change their shape - whether that was teaching Men how to turn into bears, or teaching bears how to turn into Men?

Just frankly obsessed with the idea that Radagast has these powers that could potentially make him a match for the Dark Lord himself, but he'd rather just be chilling in the woods, chatting to the birds.

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It's the April Fooling time of the year again and again.

Past April Fools comics

2023 (no comic) 2022 "My arm came off" 2021 "I'm going to die soon" 2020 "I've betrayed you" 2019 "I hate you" 2018 "I'm pregnant"

The one page versions are below the cut as per usual.

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#this is why im a filthy commie

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Today our beloved Mount Doom erupted with before unseen ferocity. Eruptions are a natural process that show the health of our most iconic landmark. However, on this occasion, the force of the erruption has resulted in structural damage to our equally iconic Lugbúrz as well as the formation of a sinkhole outside our gates.

For your own safety you are asked to remain inside Mordor. Anyone leaving will be killed. By the sinkhole. It's very deep.

It's unfortunate that so many of our people just happened to be outside the gate at the time the sinkhole formed. Our untouchable King and God Tar-Mairon has expressed his sorrow at the incident. He would like to assure you all that there is nothing to worry about.

There are no problems in Mordor.

We will rebuild.

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the ainur discussing Melkor before they indubitably let him back into arda

#melkor

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For the manwe week prompt "Free of evil | Opposition":

“The blame rests not upon you”, Nienna spoke with a heart unbarred. In a torrent endless poured forth her compassion, until Manwë found his cup filled and overflowed, her kindness not a balm but a spillage, a flood which overwhelmed instead.

In him there lay no such hollow to be filled, no chamber vast enough to contain all that she proffered, and he could not fathom why she would pour forth from herself in such direful abundance with naught to necessitate it. He had ventured here not for solace, but for counsel, to gain insight into her ruminations so as to comprehend why she acted thus. Why she, who shed tears for all the world's woes, who felt the sting of his brother’s transgressions most keenly, would then prostrate herself and implore mercy on Melkor’s behalf. Why she would weep when he who had wrought ruin and devastation was at last ensnared within unyielding confines, his evil chained in impotence.

Nienna placed her hand upon Manwë’s arm. “You know not what you do."

In these words was made apparent what the surfeit of her compassion had implied. She deemed him culpable. Blameless, yet culpable, a party who had erred unintentionally.

The verdict given had indeed not found favor with her.

“I but act our Father’s will,” Manwë did remind her then, partly to reassure her that no harm had been done. He did his Father’s will, and thus, could not err. This was the simple truth of him, the cornerstone of all his principles, the speck of light set within his spirit by which he might illumine his way through the shadows of this world. As long as he stayed faithful to this, and did trod the righteous path, he would remain untainted, and all that could be redeemed from his brother’s deeds would eventually be uplifted.

Yet Nienna remained as she had been.

“I know,” said she.

And Manwë could not comprehend her. The words hinted at dissent, as if she conceded that he had indeed acted in accordance with their Father's will, yet still somehow faltered. As if it were their Father who had erred, and caused them all to stumble. Yet this could not be so, and rather he must have misconstrued her intent, for she was not corrupt, and even contemplating casting doubt upon her purity pained his heart.

To purge these suspicions from his mind, he voiced them aloud for her to dispel: “You speak as one who has lost their faith.”

“Faith?” Nienna’s lips curved in a manner that, on another spirit, might have lead to laughter. Her amusement was sincere, and devoid of mockery, resembling the fondness of a mother confronted with the sweet innocence of her child.

“Love,” she spoke instead. "A power which does the stars in heavens raise, which births mountains and valleys and the oceans to fill them, and all life still and moving to traverse them. A boundless might, more potent even than our Father’s decree, for His will too is moved by it. For our Father loves us, and it is for love that He has made us, just as we have made the world.” She paused. “Yet love is foolish.”

Upon this perilous turn she stalled, perhaps to grant him grace. For it much seemed like a free passage, a chance for Manwë to divert the course with words of his own so he might steer clear of her true musings and escape unscathed. Yet he had come here to understand her, and to this end he did stay and hearken.

“Our Father loves us,” Nienna continued. “And He is good, and what He has made He loves, and it is then made good. This is a truth which none of you can see: that in essence, we all are virtuous, none tainted by evil's hue. That it is the deeds themselves which embody the darkness. And that, in our folly, blinded by ignorance’s veil, all, in unwitting error, succumb to sin.

And here, at last, afore these truths does emerge, the folly of our Father’s love, spoken now, yet forever unheard; for you, Manwë Súlimo, have been made free. Evil you can not comprehend, and so, what evil you beget, you can never perceive.”

@manweweek i'm a little late, hope it's okay!

#manweweek #manweweek day 5: free of evil #manwe #nienna #my writing