today i had my first pa school interview. i was nervous and giddy before my interviews however after the first one i felt more relaxed and comfortable talking with the admissions staff.
i did make some blemishes and yes the over thinker in me is constantly recalling the one mistake i did but you know what? it’s ok. i gave it my all and if that one mistake of assuming during an acting role the admissions officer was a premed student wanting to be a doctor instead of prepa student then the school just was not meant for me. i need an environment where it is ok to be nervous and make mistakes so that i can learn from them.
now its just playing the waiting game to see what their decision about me is. i am just glad i got to experience my first ever PA school interview!!!
let me tell you when i did this, i could not stop the tears from rolling down, not out of sorrow but from relief.
eventhough i am grateful for the opportunity to intern and gain pce with this clinic, my experience there has been taxing on my mental health. i would leave the job exhausted and emotionally drained from all the bullshit i had to deal with the staff.
i, a black female, had to listen to my coworkers be mocking towards certain patients, spew lies about covid/covid vaccines (yes this clinic did not believe in covid and thought the vaccine would kill you and your future babies), hear blm be called a terrorist movement while the insurrection was praised, watch a patients fear of sexual harassment be overlooked, listen to racist remarks about african-americans be spewed left and right despite it being the clinics main patient population, etc. by the end of the month of may, my mental health had hit rock bottom dealing with the people at the clinic and i just crashed. i suffered from a severe panic attack on May 25th.
thats when i knew it was time to call it a quits. For 11 months i have sat through possibly the worst workplace environment ever created by man and earned less than minimum wage for the things i did. It just wasn’t worth it. my last official day i have to walk through that door is monday and even though i am currently unemployed, i am certain i will try my hardest to not step in that clinic ever again in my life.
i am so thankful this is the last time i have to make a rant post about this wretched clinic but for anyone that is feeling stuck in a toxic place: always prioritize your mental health.
You have a choice to see rejection as redirection. Not being accepted into a job or school you applied for, or breaking up with someone is not rejection, it’s a redirection. Take these moments as a sign that the Universe is guiding you to something way better. Stop holding on to people, things or moments that aren’t meant for you anymore. So next time you catch yourself thinking “Everything is going wrong, I hate my life.” Remind yourself that it’s only a temporary situation, and that you’ll make it through it stronger, and you’ll end up where you need to be. But also honour your emotions, and how you’re feeling during the difficult moment, just don’t make it a permanent mentality/feeling.
Fun, someone said the words “prior authorizations” around me and now I’m pissed off at 730am on my day off. I go off on this rant all the time. ALL THE TIME.
submitted 4 out of 11 caspa applications ! and i feel nothing lol is that weird??
i just ripped the bandaid off after looking over my whole application like 2 or 3 times. went through 7 revisions of my personal statement. looked over transcript entry 2 times. went over experience, achievement, certification, and membership descriptions 3 times. looked over covid essay 2 times and in the end i just said fuck it 🤡
she continued to say she thinks african americans are complainers and that they don’t work as hard as true born nigerians like i’m not first gen nigerian-american? someone break me from this simulation!!!
just had the NP at my clinical practice say she hated how everything is related to race and how its not real and she want to tell me blacks can be racist to blacks and she rather have a white man be racist to her and i was like wtf is wrong with you
COVID is slowly becoming a "third world" disease. While first world countries are hoarding vaccines, having doses for populations many times their size, third world countries can't get any because pharma companies want to sell to the first world countries first. Even then, first world countries will receive them first. While rich countries recover from COVID, they will forget about the pandemic while many other countries live the absolute worst moment of the pandemic without being able to vaccinate their population.