h0llyalexander

[h0llyalexander]

Open to female muses | Plot: Holly's parents found out she has lesbian tendencies, so they sent her to a convent. | Connection: your muse could be another nun at the convent, or they could be one of the women in charge, or they could even be a friend Holly knows from the outside who tries to help her escape. This could go any direction really, I just wanted to do a nun plot <3 @indiestarter

A nightmare. Of all the places, she never thought she'd end up in a nunnery. She didn't know what was worse - the boring bible lessons or the fact that everyone had to dress exactly the same. Holly loved fashion. It was one of the main ways she liked to express herself. She didn't realize that when she got here, her suitcases full of stylish items would be confiscated and she would be given a habit, complete with a veil and a rosary to hang around her neck. She felt absolutely ridiculous. It wasn't that she didn't believe in God - she was still on the fence about this one - but why should believing in Him dictate wearing such boring clothes? And everyone was so serious here. As she left her room and strolled across the courtyard, she was dragging her feet to bible class. Holly was already dreading the day.

#indie lesbian rp #indie starter #indie rp #open starter

[h0llyalexander]

"I don't know if we're the same size. You're like, so tall." She teased, although there was a part of her that was a little bit jealous of them. It was much easier to become a model when you were tall. At least for runway stuff. It was the main reason she never made the cut, even though she'd tried plenty of times. "Besides, you know I love shopping. Oh, we could go to Valentino!"

Monte sighs, throwing their trademark black long sleeve back on, "Okay, Okay." They hated shopping, but for her, they might be willing to look past the needed adventure "Do I get to raid your closet first or is it straight to the stores?"

#reblog #proverbialsaints #prepare for her to awkwardly flop back and forth between flirting and insulting monte lmaooo

[h0llyalexander]

@proverbialsaints

"No offense, but that's like the lamest outfit I've ever seen. In fact, we need to redo your whole closet."

#I figured I would write you a bunch of random starters and you can just pick which muses to use #let's just throw muses back and forth and see what sticks lmao #no pressure though :) #proverbialsaints

[h0llyalexander]

MUSE PREFERENCES!!

Rules: Bold which your muse prefers, out of the following pairs

peace or war

sun or stars

flowers or trees

crescent moon or full moon

streets or skyscrapers

rooftops or balconies

ink or glitter

life or death

order or chaos

candle or bonfire

ocean or sky

leather or silk

sweet or sour

overstimulation or under stimulation

book or letter

soft or coarse (either or for holly)

fight or flight

spoken or written

silver or gold (because it's more expensive)

playing cards or tarot cards

circles or angles

cramped or vast

checkers or chess

feel free to copy!!

#headcanons #meme

[h0llyalexander]

Holly was not at all unfamiliar with this sense of panic. This utter dread, the feeling that every word she said was making the situation worse and yet not being able to stop herself from talking. She could hear herself screaming and yelling, and how quiet Dani was sounding in response but it was almost like watching a play. Like she was watching someone else act, not in control of herself, until it was too late. She could hear Dani apologizing behind her and for a moment, it calmed her down some. Sometimes when she least expected it, Dani would say the right thing and Holly would be reminded of why she felt so close to her. She just wished it was like that more often. And she wished she knew what to say too. She was already starting to feel some regret creeping in about the things she'd said about Dani not having any friends before her. It was so mean. She didn't know why she said that. Holly let out a small, wet sounding sob, using one of her sleeves to wipe away the tears that were now pouring down her cheeks. Unlike Dani, she had absolutely no ability to hold it in. She was trying, though. She hated being seen like this. It felt so weak, crying like a pathetic little child. She didn't even realize Dani was crying too, until she heard the tone in her voice starting to shift a little bit and turning more trembly. When she heard that, Holly was tempted to turn around and check - was it true? Was Dani the ice queen of stoicism really crying just like her? But she was still scared of Dani seeing her own face. She started wiping harder at it, trying to get off all the tears and praying her eyes were not as red and puffy as they felt when she turned around. As it turned out, Dani wasn't even looking at her, but she was apologizing now and that made it rather hard to stay mad at her. For a moment, Holly was silent, wanting to be sure Dani was done speaking before she said anything. "Thank you for apologizing", she sighed a little bit, her shoulders slumping in visible relief, though there was undoubtedly still tension there. "I'm sorry too. And...I guess you have emotions, I mean obviously..." She felt a little stupid somehow, now that the emotions on Dani's face were undeniable. "I just thought...I don't know, I thought you like didn't care or whatever. Because you went out with him and like..." Her breath hitched for a moment as she felt herself getting slightly choked up again. "Like, I thought maybe you were into him. Like you didn't want to do this thing anymore, with you and me and you'd rather go out with him and-" Her words were pouring out now, her hands gesturing back and forth between herself and Dani in a somewhat panicked way. "And I'm just really not ready for it to be over."

"Holly, I-" Perhaps the silver lining Holly throwing the book at the wall was that it was enough to stop Dani from deny that she was gaslighting her, which would likely lead to yet another spiraling loop between them that Dani was gaslighting her in saying she wasn't. Was she? Had Dani gotten so used to gaslighting herself until she felt like a hollow shell of a person that she couldn't realize she was doing the same thing to everyone else around her too? Staying silent as ever, stiff as a statue contrasted with Holly's staggering, she just waited for the storm to pass. Except, that was all she ever did, and it only ever seemed to make anything worse. Her threat barely even registered in Dani's mind. Like she could hear the individual words, but they were scattered and scrambled, and she didn't have the energy to string them together to understand them. "I'm sorry," she said after a pause. There were more thoughts, more words she wanted to say, but all she could hear was a ringing and a pressure in her head drowning it all out.

She rubbed her eye and pinched the bridge of her nose, prepared to blame allergies if Holly decided to turn around. Her eyes were leaking, and she felt so detached that she couldn't even feel why. It would have been the same if she was standing in outside and raindrops were falling and trickling down her face. But maybe this was one of the few things the two of them had in common - they would rather be hating each other as much as either of them claimed than show genuine and authentic emotion like tears. She turned her head, her hair shielding Holly's view from her tear stained eyes. "I'm sorry for calling you that, and I'm sorry for going on a date with Jake... Just please stop staying I don't have emotions? I have a lot, and it's really fucking hard not to show them sometimes." Especially around Holly, but she managed to bite her tongue before saying that.

#celestialxdancers #oof this got long for some reason #but yes i LOVE their opposites attract energy #reblog #toxic relationship tw

[h0llyalexander]

More and more, Holly felt the urge to slap her for always acting like nothing ever bothered her. But...she had a feeling she might not be able to come back from that. A part of her was scared of that too, losing Dani forever. Dani pissed her off regularly, but she was also the one person Holly could feel completely calm around sometimes. "Stop gaslighting me! I'm not fucking delusional, you just don't understand me! At all!" Rather than slap her, Holly decided to grab a nearby book and chuck it at the wall, letting out an angry screech as she tried not to boil over entirely. She didn't even notice the fact that Dani was showing a lot more emotion than usual, or that some of her stoic mask was slipping away. "God..." She turned around, staggering a little bit out of sheer anger and bringing both of her hands to her head. It was a confused attempt to calm down. Delusional. She had been called that before, not just by Dani. The more often that word popped up in people's vocabulary, the more it stung. And the more she was starting to wonder if they were right. "Just- just go away, or I'm seriously gonna throw something at you", Holly warned her, tears starting to brim behind her eyes. She didn't want Dani to see, so she stayed right where she was, with her back facing towards her.

"I have emotions, I just also have the ability separate them from reality so I don't become delusional." Dani replied, taking a moment to realize how much her own volume had risen and her hands clenched into tight fists. Why was she even upset at the accusation of having no emotions? That was what she wanted. If people saw her as a cold soulless robot void of any heart or emotions, all the better. Certainly was preferable to throwing temper tantrums any time things didn't go her way. She shook her head subtly to herself before shifting her gaze away. "Sure, whatever you say." It was all the response Dani was able to offer without completely cracking her stoic facade any more than she already had. "Why do you care? I don't know you, you don't know me, why don't we just keep it that way?"

#i legit feel bad for dani asafhlhasf #holly not stable at all #you KNOW if dani leaves she's gonna call her or show up at her door later and try to be friends again #smdh #reblog #toxic relationship tw #celestialxdancers

[h0llyalexander]

"Excuse me? At least I have emotions! You're like a robot half the time!", Holly snapped back, and for a moment she regretted the fact that she had nothing in her hands to throw. On some level, she wished she shared Dani's stoicism. She truly resented the fact that she was so emotional sometimes, but it simply wasn't possible for her to hide how she felt for more than a couple days. Sometimes, a couple minutes. In order to compensate, she had made friends with people who did not pay her enough attention to even notice her emotions. It was a good strategy, she thought. It was safe. But then Dani had to come along and notice her in a way no one else would. "Who says I don't call them? Maybe I lied about that, you don't know. 'Cause you don't know me! We talk about things other than you, we're not that shallow." It was half true - yes, they discussed other things besides shittalking Dani but they didn't exactly have deep conversations. "You didn't even have any other friends before me. Don't tell me Jake is your friend now? He's like the most boring guy ever."

"Right, I'm a snake because I don't have the emotional maturity of an eight year old boy picking fights with his crush on the playground because he can't admit he likes them." Though Dani would be lying if she didn't know, at least in the back of her mind, how much it would sting when word would inevitably get around to Holly. And maybe on some level there was an element of petty payback that went into her openness to go out with Jake. Dani spent her entire life perfecting the art of stuffing down her emotions and calling it intelligence, yet Holly came around and effortlessly stirred everything buried up inside of her and reopened wounds that never fully healed. She couldn't ignore the racing heart or her breath catching in her throat around Holly, but she could ignore it around Jake. "Then why not call your actual friends? Or is there nothing to talk about with them if you're not shit talking me behind my back?"

#reblog #celestialxdancers

[h0llyalexander]

After finding out that Dani had gone on a date with one of the guys at school, Holly had decided she was a traitor. It didn't matter that this was during one of the times that they were fighting, and Holly was basically ignoring her. She should have known that it was only temporary. Because...because she told Dani already, that she liked her. In a real way. Not like the guys she dated before to impress her parents. "Don't worry I'm not going to call anymore because you are a total snake! I found out about you going out with Jake, yeah, I bet you thought I wouldn't hear about that? But I'm not fucking stupid. And...you know what else, I only called you because I was bored anyway! You're the stupid one for thinking otherwise!"

"Is that your final answer?" Dani asked after a moment of disbelief. "Just for future reference - y'know, for the next time you call me because you can't sleep and your friends aren't around, I'll know I can just ignore it." Truth was, Dani was tired. One minute, Holly saw her as nothing more than some loser who was entirely inept in all forms of socialization. The next, she'd act as though there was no one else in the world except the two of them, wherever secret place she found that day. "Because honestly, I'm beginning to think maybe I hate you too because this is getting ridiculous."

#omg SAME #i missed having holly act like an idiot around dani lmaooo #reblog #celestialxdancers

[h0llyalexander]

Open to anyone

"You know what I just realized? I actually really fucking hate you."

#starter #indie rp starter #indie rp #crazy starter i know #idek where its going but lets find outtttt

[h0llyalexander]

y'all I am 🤏🤏🤏🤏THIS🤏🤏🤏🤏 close to making a Joe Goldberg RP account i stg

#ooc

[h0llyalexander]

Though Holly was only joking about Jake possibly asking Dani out, the more she thought about it, she could kind of see it. They were both kind of dorky and while Jake was a lot more popular, he didn't seem to mind hanging out with the weirder students in school. Of course, Dani would have to be interested in him too but why wouldn't she be? Jake had a lot of good qualities. He was tall, handsome, charismatic, athletic, fun at parties. Perhaps that was why she had trouble coming up with a reason when Dani asked her why it was that she broke up with him. "Hm? Oh, no, that's...I mean, yes, sort of. We just didn't really click", she answered vaguely, because what else could she say? She wasn't even ready to admit to herself that what she was really lacking in the relationship had nothing to do with Jake. "He was always like, wanting to do nerdy stuff and for me to join him, and I just wasn't really interested in that. We just like different things. You know how it is", she shrugged, although she wasn't sure if Dani had even been in a relationship before. If she had to guess, she'd say...probably not. "I mean, obviously we're still friends but like, it's not a romantic thing anymore", she insisted without prompting, and she couldn't explain why. She just wanted Dani to know that she was no longer interested in him. "I think I need somebody more mature, you know? Someone who's more on my level." She made a vaguely haughty hand gesture towards herself, suggesting that while Jake was an okay guy, he wasn't quite as mature and evolved as she was. "I'm so tired of how immature the guys are at our school. Like seriously, grow up." She rolled her eyes, visibly annoyed for a moment, and then her smile was back as she urged Dani to sit down with her by the campfire. Finally and with a tiny bit of reluctance, her hand let go of Dani's and she busied herself with a few more sips of her drink. There were a few other people also sitting around the campfire, including Tara from earlier in the kitchen. Things seemed kind of quiet, it appeared that they caught everyone in the lull of the conversation, so Holly spoke up: "Guys, let's play a game! How about truth or dare?"

"Fair enough," Dani said, shrugging. Honestly, she was already thinking that she had to try that. A brow raised slightly as she saw Holly reach for another shot, and for some reason it sparked a competitive side to Dani that people rarely saw so plainly. Without saying a word, Dani did the same, reaching for a shot and throwing it back. If she was smart, she'd be extra intent to pace herself. Hardy knowing any of the people around her, an environment she'd never been to before... there were a lot of factors against her in that moment. But drinking was one of the few things Dani never gave a second thought to. Especially with them just laying around for everyone, who was she not to indulge just a little bit? "Y'know, you didn't look like you literally drank poison that time," Dani praised, a slight smirk tugging at her lips. "How'd you do when you had to take cough syrup or any of those kinda medicines as a kid?" It probably was a risk to bring up anyone's childhood considering Dani couldn't recall a single person who knew hers - but watching Holly try to hide the utter disgust as she felt the vodka burned her throat unlocked memories of her doing the same thing with medicine as a kid. Since god forbid a child thought medicine tasted yucky. Dani took another sip of her other drink, right before Holly pulled her to the next thing.

To her surprise, she made no attempt to pull her hand away or anything. Normally, it was like she'd jump ten feet in the air if someone so much as grazed her shoulder as they passed by, but when Holly grabbed her hand, it just felt right. Like why wouldn't she? "I mean, I don't," Dani confirmed. It wasn't exactly her point, but honestly, she was already starting to get just a bit too tipsy to really care. Nevertheless, she took another sip of her drink, and even peered back towards the kitchen just for a moment as she silently debated with herself if she'd want another drink once she finished the one she was working on. She supposed she'd cross that bridge when she got there, plus there wasn't much time to consider anyway before someone else was talking to them. Shifting her focus back to the living room, she offered Jack a half attempted smile and a quick nod. "Thanks. You too..." Dani hardly considered Jake to be a friend, but he seemed nice enough... Every now and then the two of them would be paired up in classes, even just in class assignments. It was awkward, but certainly better than a lot of the other people she was stuck with for projects. Dani listened as Holly filled Dani in, and she nearly laughed as she revealed Jake's dark secret. "Oh really, I wouldn't guess?" she asked, still trying to hold back a chuckle. Sure people probably had various definitions of what a dork meant, but Jake was the epitome of one as far as Dani was concerned. She didn't even mean that insultingly either - he just didn't take himself seriously... it honestly was refreshing at times. "Is that why you broke up with him?" She asked, taking another sip, as Holly lead them outside. She wasn't sure why, but she had the growing curiosity of what Holly actually looked for in people.

#reblog #celestialxdancers #alcohol tw

[h0llyalexander]

i hope i’m not the only fool

a dani and holly ( @h0llyalexander ) spotify playlist // linked here

got weird - dodie // lonely hearts club - marina // emotional - ashe // bad idea! - girl in red // better in the dark - léon // a temporary high ( acoustic ) - aurora // late nights - mxmtoon // more like you - orla gartland // talking to yourself - carly rae jepsen // kitchen light - xana // anyway - gabrielle aplin // basic - sigrid // the party - maisie peters // float - olivia dean

#ASDJGASFKAGF WHY DO THESE FIT SO WELL #like omg #i was looking for songs too and I've found two so far #TWO #how did you find so many fitting songs so quickly lmao #i love this <333 #reblog #playlist #holly x dani

[h0llyalexander]

For a moment there was silence, and Holly was certain that Dani was going to hang up the phone. But then she didn't and for some reason that made her happy. Usually when she had late night conversations with friends, it would just be to gossip about drama. Wait...did she just call Dani a friend? That wasn't right...right? They weren't quite friends. But she did want to hang out with her. God, maybe she was confused after all. She took a moment before answering Dani's question: "Oh, no, I need my beauty sleep", she chuckled, although there was a tiny hint of insecurity in her voice. She knew she was beautiful. It wasn't that she felt ugly. It was the fear of losing her beauty one day that scared her. Terrified her, actually. She knew that day would come, and she knew it would come sooner rather than later. No one could hold on to their beauty forever. But the women in her family sure had made a habit of trying. Dani was beautiful too, in a more natural type of way. Like she didn't have to try. She didn't have to enhance anything. "Are you? Up late, normally, I mean", she returned the question rather awkwardly, but didn't wait for an answer. "Actually, I think the last time I was up this late was when I snuck out of the house. I was dating this guy who my father didn't like." She left out the part where she didn't really like him either, she was just feeling rebellious at the time. "God, we got so wasted...it was fun. But then he wanted me to help him steal something, and I was like no. I found out he had like, this really serious drinking habit so I broke up with him because he was always asking for money or trying to lift stuff." Again she found herself divulging details of her life to Dani, unprompted, and she would probably ask herself why later. Sometimes it was like she couldn't stop talking. Especially when the other person was rather quiet. "Anyway...have you ever done something bad?"

A simple nod was all the confirmation Dani offered until she remembered Holly wasn't in the room with her. Perhaps it was just due to Dani being so oblivious at times despite being so perceptive - one of the many instances she was just a walking contradiction, or maybe Holly just had such a presence that could be felt even when they were just conversing on the phone. "Yeah. Sounds good," she answered audibly. Once again nodding when Holly seemed to say her goodbye, but not quite closing the door. Brows furrowed slightly, wondering if there was another social cue Dani had missed. Despite the confusion, there was something strangely comforting - to just sit in silence and knowing that Holly was on the other line doing the same thing. As if to see who was going to break it first. It almost felt like the world itself had paused, except for her and Holly. "So are you normally up this late?" Dani asked, her voice sounding louder to her than usual, but she knew it was the same volume if not softer, and just felt otherwise because it had contrasted against the extended silence. Small talk wasn't Dani's thing - something that likely wouldn't come to Holly's surprise. Yet she couldn't bring herself to hang up for some reason, even with the understanding she'd see Holly the next day.

#reblog #celestialxdancers

[h0llyalexander]

Holly felt oddly excited when Dani agreed to eat lunch with her tomorrow. She seemed reluctant at first, but that was probably just because they weren't friends. She wasn't expecting Dani to get all hyped up, obviously. But if she was being perfectly honest, she was a little hyped herself. Of course she tried her best not to let it show. "It's decided then! We'll meet behind the church at 1PM." Maybe she'd bring her nail polish. She had a habit of painting her nails and gossiping with friends during lunch breaks. Stereotypical, maybe, but she enjoyed her girly habits. She wondered if Dani had any of those. She had seen her with a tiny bit of make up at the party, but it was so little that she actually didn't notice for the first two hours. It wasn't until their faces were close together during that game of spin the bottle that she realized Dani was wearing a tiny bit of mascara. Not even any foundation, she realized. And then she got kind of jealous, because her skin looked amazing. In order to stop herself from breaking out, Holly had a nine-step skincare routine that took half an hour out of her day. "Well...see you tomorrow", she mumbled, although she didn't hang up the phone yet. She was suddenly feeling uncharacteristically shy. Maybe it was because she didn't know what else to say. Or maybe she was just starting to realize that she'd called Dani up in the middle of the night, just to ask her to hang out and they hadn't even really talked about the kiss. But she said she enjoyed the party, and the kiss happened during the party, so did she enjoy the kiss too? And why was she even worrying about this in the first place? It was driving her crazy.

Holly paused for a second when Dani asked her that dreaded question. Why? Dreaded, because she had no good answer for it. They weren't friends, not really, not officially. And they didn't hang out usually. The only reason Dani came to the party was to prove a point. But Holly had sort of hoped in the back of her mind that Dani would have enjoyed the party so much she would want to hang out more often. "Because...", she started, searching her brain for an excuse. "Because we need to gossip about the party, obviously." It was the best she could come up with on such short notice and she didn't think it was that bad. A lot happened at the party. Aside from their kiss, people also got super drunk and one guy tried to jump off the roof as a dare. She was pretty sure that there were even some people who took drugs. And one girl danced on the table topless. It was a wild night and she had a habit of gossiping about it with her friends afterwards. She just kind of assumed Dani did the same because who wouldn't? She had never met anyone in her life who didn't like to gossip. "So are you in or what? You usually eat your lunch alone, right? Isn't it more fun to eat with someone?" She said it less as an insult this time, and more as just a way to make the idea sound more appealing to Dani. "I'm in a group chat, one of my friends took some really funny pictures that night. I can show them to you over lunch. There's even a picture of you where you look less nerdy than usual."

#celestialxdancers #reblog #holly x dani

[h0llyalexander]

@celestialxdancers continued from here (new post because my old reply was with legacy editor too lol)

"It just tastes better", Holly answered defensively, and because she didn't want to seem like a lightweight, she quickly grabbed another shot off the counter and poured it down her throat. "But whatever", she shrugged and smiled triumphantly, trying her best to hide the disgust from her face as she felt the alcohol burning a little bit as it slid down her throat. Ugh...yeah, she really did not like straight up vodka. She took her other drink with her - the cocktail one - while she grabbed Dani's hand to pull her along to the living room. While she did so, she had the faintest thought about how soft Dani's hands were but she quickly pushed it to the side. "Oh please, like you have a disco outfit at home", she chuckled. She doubted it would have mattered all that much if she told Dani, this girl always seemed to ignore all the latest fashion trends. It was almost impressive. Holly secretly had the slightest bit of envy over it. She always worked hard to look her best. Color-coordinating her outfits, accessorizing, making sure her make up was on point. Looking good was one of the most important things, especially as a woman. That was what her mother and sister both agreed on. She wanted to impress them, and also her potential future husband, who was going to be just as good looking and rich as her and who was going to sweep her off her feet like a prince. She hadn't quite met that guy yet - actually, she had yet to meet any guy who made her feel the butterflies the romance movies she liked to watch always talked about - but she would, any day now. She just knew it.

As soon as they arrived in the living room, Holly still sipping from her drink and not quite letting go of Dani's hand, Jake came rushing over to greet them. "Holly, you made it! Sweet! You too Dani, good to see you. You guys wanna dance?" He seemed chipper, dressed in his 70's disco outfit complete with fake afro and indoor sunglasses. He looked kind of silly. He's probably been drinking, Holly thought. There was a time when she thought that maybe Jake would be her 'prince charming'. They went out for a while, but it didn't take her long to find an excuse to dump him. Her reasoning was that he wasn't 'serious' enough. However, unlike most of her friends, Jake didn't really have a problem with Dani. He was too busy playing sports to care about some girl from his class being a little weird. "Maybe later", Holly turned him down and Jake shrugged, offering them both a smile before he was off to go greet some other guests. Holly quickly leaned in closer to Dani, speaking under her breath: "You know I dated him for a while? But then I broke up with him. You wouldn't guess it but he's kind of a dork. Oh, hey, maybe he'll hook up with you", she teased, and this time it really was just a joke because even though she usually liked to play matchmaker, for some reason she didn't really like the idea of setting Dani up with someone. "Come on, let's go outside. Jake's backyard has a campfire", she suggested and the hand, which she hadn't let go of this whole time, was starting to feel more comfortable in her palm as she started pulling Dani along with her once again.

#celestialxdancers #reblog

[h0llyalexander]

Holly paused for a second when Dani asked her that dreaded question. Why? Dreaded, because she had no good answer for it. They weren't friends, not really, not officially. And they didn't hang out usually. The only reason Dani came to the party was to prove a point. But Holly had sort of hoped in the back of her mind that Dani would have enjoyed the party so much she would want to hang out more often. "Because...", she started, searching her brain for an excuse. "Because we need to gossip about the party, obviously." It was the best she could come up with on such short notice and she didn't think it was that bad. A lot happened at the party. Aside from their kiss, people also got super drunk and one guy tried to jump off the roof as a dare. She was pretty sure that there were even some people who took drugs. And one girl danced on the table topless. It was a wild night and she had a habit of gossiping about it with her friends afterwards. She just kind of assumed Dani did the same because who wouldn't? She had never met anyone in her life who didn't like to gossip. "So are you in or what? You usually eat your lunch alone, right? Isn't it more fun to eat with someone?" She said it less as an insult this time, and more as just a way to make the idea sound more appealing to Dani. "I'm in a group chat, one of my friends took some really funny pictures that night. I can show them to you over lunch. There's even a picture of you where you look less nerdy than usual."

@h0llyalexander cont from here

"You might be if you mistook confused with confusing," Dani corrected. As Holly double downed on not pretending, it only convinced Dani she was. Something about the conversation felt off, and she couldn't quite understand how she knew that - she just did. And the feeling that Holly was holding something back only made Dani's head spin more. "Right, because we were all so busy twiddling our thumbs waiting for the professor to show up ten minutes after class started..." What was the point of calling? She could feel herself getting more and more confused, and he more uncertain she felt, the more frustrated she became. Normally, she unnervingly skilled in the art of stuffing that down, but something about Holly - more specifically since after the party, it was harder to hide behind her stoic exterior. When Holly went on to ask her question, Dani blinked a couple of times before leaning back in her chair to look up at the ceiling. So many questions swirling her mind, but having no desire to voice any of them because in Dani's mind, they all should have been answered by then. Just us? When? Why? She didn't know how long she spent staring at her ceiling instead of answering since each second felt more drawn out than the last. "Why?" She settled on, at least to start. It felt like the most important question as well, and one that all the other thoughts seemed to lead back to. A part of Dani wanted to just agree just so she could spend more time with Holly - but the more sensible part was terrified that that part even existed. Dani insisted that fear had nothing to do with her not connecting with anyone, but the tight feeling in her throat and the knots tying in her stomach begged to differ.

#celestialxdancers #reblog

[h0llyalexander]

"I'm not confused", Holly quickly fired back, not realizing that that wasn't quite what Dani had said. It was just that she'd heard that term before. Her sister called her that once, when she borrowed her laptop one time and found the not-so-straight browser history Holly forgot to delete. It didn't mean anything, obviously, she was just morbidly curious one evening and decided to look up some things, but it didn't mean she was confused. When Dani pointed out that she'd hardly even looked at her since the party, Holly let out a small, slightly tense chuckle. "I'm not pretending, God, do you think I'm some kind of monster or something? I was going to talk to you, I just hadn't had the chance yet." And by chance, she meant a moment where she was not with her friends, because they were still convinced that she was just pranking Dani. Well, most of them were. She could tell one of her friends was starting to get a little suspicious. Maybe she talked about Dani too much. She couldn't stop herself from coming up with new ideas to prank or interact with her, even if those ideas didn't make a whole lot of sense and her friends had already mostly lost interest in picking on Dani. Holly had kind of been hoping to find some moment alone with her, where they could talk without anybody seeing, but it was hard to find an isolated place at a school with over 2000 students. "So, anyway...I was thinking...you know that place like two streets behind campus, behind the church? There's like a field, we could have lunch there maybe."

“I don’t know, it didn’t mean anything anyway, I mean–” She was already halfway into crafting a defense for herself when Dani’s words finally sunk in with her and caused her to pause for a moment. “Fun? Wait, really?” She felt a weird, tingly feeling in her chest as soon as she heard that. What did that mean though? Did she mean the kiss? Or the party? Or was she messing with her? Or being sarcastic? God, she wished she could see Dani’s face right now. But at the same time she didn’t, because then Dani would be able to see her face as well and she probably looked like an idiot right now. “Well…I thought it was fun too”, she admitted. Maybe it was because it was late at night and she was alone in her room, but for some reason she was feeling honest right now. The kiss wasn’t a prank. Even though that is what she told her friends as an excuse, it hadn’t been a prank or something to make Dani look silly. She just…kissed her. She still didn’t even understand it herself, she was kind of ashamed actually. She had pranked girls before, obviously, but not with something like that. Hearing that Dani had a good time was kind of a relief. “I guess I was wrong, you do know how to party.”

#celestialxdancers #reblog #ngl i love how awkward their interactions are #and holly trying to flirt in the worst way possible #'ew i like you loser' #lmaooo