Tumgik
Text
“If you want I can sniff your knee for a second opinion”
- 🖕
48 notes · View notes
Text
I didn't realize how many people dont know what cat. 1 means lmao -🤠
For context: I live in Florida and we have a cat. 1 hurricane coming like today
Me: I hope [work place] closes today because of the hurricane I don't want to go to work
Mom: they won't it's only a cat. 1
I feel like "it's only a cat. 1" is something only floridians would say tbh 🤠
156 notes · View notes
Text
For context: I live in Florida and we have a cat. 1 hurricane coming like today
Me: I hope [work place] closes today because of the hurricane I don't want to go to work
Mom: they won't it's only a cat. 1
I feel like "it's only a cat. 1" is something only floridians would say tbh 🤠
156 notes · View notes
Note
Me: "If I ever need to defend myself, I'm kicking a bitch in the dick."
My friend: "On one hand, fair. On the other, that's a fate only the worst of the worst deserves."
Me: "Peen pain."
My friend: "Kicking them pedos in the balls, Erectile Dysfunction Man."
Me: "My favorite superhero."
Not the weirdest conversation in my gc, but it makes me chuckle.
- I've seen a lot of weird group chat conversations and this is definitely up there 🤠
263 notes · View notes
Note
(Not from school)
Mom: "I don't think I spent the cash"
Me and my friend: "The first stage of grief, denial."
- we've all been there tbh 🤠
153 notes · View notes
Note
"And the obligatory female that my little brothers Mii likes"
(now guess context
- I--- what context could this even be? 🤠
55 notes · View notes
Note
(Context: Teacher brought in donuts when we weren't allowed to have them. This is a compilation of tryna hide them.)
*My teacher tried rushing the principal out the room.*
*Me, with 11 paper towels from the bathroom:* "Don't be suspicious, don't be suspicious..."
"Lets just say that we all brought a donut and put them in one box!"
"Or I could try hiding them behind my body"
*Insert speed donut eating*
- one of my teachers almost got fired for like having a party with us because someone's parent thought it would be a good idea to take the food for it to the office 🤠
189 notes · View notes
Note
(Context, lights broke)
Me: "Hey [irl friend's name], do you know what happened?"
"No, [irl name] no one knows what fucking happened."
-everyone is constantly confused all the time and that's a vibe 🤠
144 notes · View notes
Note
One kid: "I think that Frederick Douglas would be happy with how far we've come, but would fight to push us forward even more"
*this sparked a like 40 comment long debate*
Me (Pretty much but edited to be more school friendly) "Hey guys, what the fuck happened here?"
- conversations like that get out of hand way too fast 🤠
55 notes · View notes
Text
Hey guys! Just wanted to drop in and say sorry if we are not as active lately most of our quotes at the moment are coming from asks and suggestions and admin adam and I are currently working so we don't have as much time. I will try to be as active as possible when I can. Thank you all so much for the support guys!
- admin James 🤠
25 notes · View notes
Note
From Student Council:
Me: "Wait... what happened"
Teacher 1: "You fell asleep"
Teacher 2: "Mhm"
Me: "Sorry, I gotta go-"
*I dash outside*
-confuse teachers as much as possible 🤠
65 notes · View notes
Note
[in the groupchat for my school’s color guard group, also this is a few months old] “hey what do you guys want for dinner tomorrow night”
“Cor n d of”
”corn’d of what?”
”corn’d of dog”
- a large portion of my humor consists of words or phrases that are only slightly wrong 🤠
94 notes · View notes
Text
A friend sent a pic of him in his new class
A -reply to that photo-: is maneskin problematic?
Me: idk but should we learn sign language?
47 notes · View notes
Text
So I put on make up for the first time and since I didn't have eyeshadow, I put lipstick on my eyes. I also had a dot on my nose
Me: Ayyo I put on make up- MY MOM IS HERE LEMME SPEEDRUN TAKING THIS OFF
Them: cool, what up with the dot?
Me: It is there to represent how much of a clown I am.
Them: mood
91 notes · View notes
Note
"Why are you coming to the cafeteria, you eat in the gym"
"Because I require food."
"Oops."
-People freak out when someone breaks a schedule man 🤠
86 notes · View notes
Note
(Me and two friends were walking to lunch and talking [pre-Covid] Iwas talkingand movingmy hands back and forthin a chopping motion. Then I hit something)
Friend 1: "Hey [real name]..."
Me: "Yea?"
(He jesters to friend 2. who is in a bit of pain)
Thats the time I hit my friend in the nuts.
- fucking rip that dude man (also I meant to post this earlier but I got distracted sorry) 🤠
67 notes · View notes
Text
"What else can I do now that I'm 17?"
Person 1: "illegal substances?"
Person 2: "laugh at 16 year olds?"
Person 3: "cry"
- every three person friend group I've ever met has this dynamic no one can convince me otherwise 🤠
456 notes · View notes