futurewriter2000

[futurewriter2000]

Things I realised dealing with an alcoholic parent:

You will never be their priority. They won’t love you the most, even if you are a lover, a child or twin.

They are a pathological liar. Whatever they say to make you feel better is a lie, so there will always be empty promises. You will always end up disappointed.

They don’t register whatever you are saying when they are under the influence, so there is no point in arguing with them. They will hate your words as much as your silence.

There is always abuse, toil and trauma present. You can end up with a lot of issues because of it but you can always work on these issues once you accept them.

They will always be the victim. You cannot fix them. Nobody can fix them. They will seek blame in everybody else but themselves. It’s how they wired themselves to be.

Whenever they say they will kill themselves because of that and that, they won’t. It’s their way of manipulating you and getting a reaction out of you.

They hate you because they hate themselves. You are a burden to them all the time. Whether they show it or not, you are their burden. It’s not your fault but it’s how they feel.

You are the caretaker. You clean, you cook, you take care of everything financially, emotionally and mentally. Everything is on you because they are incapable of doing any of those things.

No amount of words or actions will fix them. There is a saying that only an alcoholic can cure an alcoholic. So if you’re not one, you can’t heal them and you shouldn’t try. Some things are worth fighting for.

Whatever you do, it will never be enough. They won’t be there to support you, they won’t care, you are simply not worth their energy and time but when you do achieve something, they will boast about it to everybody because of their relation to you.

It’s better to have no parent than an alcoholic one.

#based on personal experience #its different for everyone

[futurewriter2000]

[futurewriter2000]

Sometimes I love the way you hurt me… mostly because it makes me realise that I’m still attached to you.

[futurewriter2000]

“Maybe when I decide that enough is enough… then I finally let it go to the hands of the universe… and wait for something else to come back to me.”

[futurewriter2000]

I dont know why so many people love hip thrusts. I hate them. Fcking hate them killing me.

#gym

[futurewriter2000]

[futurewriter2000]

My childhood trauma didn't make me stronger. it made me a people pleaser. it made me forgive way too much. it made me not speak when i'm supposed to. it made me an extreme empath.

[futurewriter2000]

“Gledali smo se kada nas nisu gledali, i to je to.”

- Đorđe Balašević

[futurewriter2000]

[futurewriter2000]

You wanna volunteer?

[futurewriter2000]

Me: Yeah, I only have 1 body count.

Every single guy I ever met: NO?! REally!!!! Respect. *proceeds to give me a fist bump*

#i swear #guys are so weird

[futurewriter2000]

[futurewriter2000]

Things that happened in the past week:

My ex and I hooked up again

I finished two of my uni subjects

I got sexually harassed by an old man on a bus station

My ex started acting like a bitch and I cried like one bc of it.

There is a cute co-worker, who brought me a chocolate bar and that never turns out because he’s like the fourth co-worker who did that and with the last three I ended up falling in love, dating and breaking ones heart. All bc of a chocolate bar.

I got my period but this one was very nice to me and it was gone in three days.

The week is not over yet but pls let it be.

[futurewriter2000]

My older sister: We tell each other everything.

Me: *having a secret life nobody knows about except my delulu friends*

[futurewriter2000]

[futurewriter2000]

When one man ignores you, there is another man that will share his second half of chocolate with you and search the whole workplace to find you and give it to you 🥹❤️

[futurewriter2000]

I don’t know if I’m being delusional or reasonable by thinking if I should text him first…

#probably delusional