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Tuesday night debates in my flat

#the last kingdom #uhtred #uhtred of bebbanburg #alexander dreymon #osferth #ewan mitchell #finan #sihtric

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Do I know that the Darkling is a villian who, while his goals may be good on some level, has no sympathy towards the human cost of them?? Yes.

Does that stop my very soft headcannon where he adopts the grishenka with the most potential like Ivan and Zoya who are meant to be proteges but actually become his children and will call him Papa in moments of weakness???? Nope.

#Im not sure where I saw this originally but mind did just run with it #and I get that Zoya and the darkling had a thing but im ignoring that #instead her bitchiness towards Alina is because she doesn't want a new mum #shadow and bone #and like in private they are far too comfortable and just lay around his private rooms #leigh bardugo #the darkling #ivan kaminsky #fedyor kaminsky #zoya nazyanelsky #six of crows #I don't make the rules #genya safin #david kostyk

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Just imagine what the Sansa vs Daenerys conflict could have been in Season 8

Disclaimer: I am a Sansa fan. I understand the appeal of Daenerys I just believe she was in the wrong. So maybe take some of this with a pinch of salt.

So Season 8, Episode 1, Dany and Jon arrive back at Winterfell with two dragons and an army. It is immediately clear that the two characters have been pinned against each other, which I agree with but of course, D&D had to fuck it up.

The two characters are, or at least up to season 5, some of the most nuanced female characters in the show. They have arc's shaped by the people they meet and their experiences, and that is clear to the viewer. By this point, in my opinion, the seeds of madness are definitely within Dany and resistance from those within the Seven Kingdoms isn't helping. In comparison, Sansa now has the potential to be the major political force in the show.

Littlefinger is dead. Tyrion, Varys and Cersei have been relegated to 2D versions of their original characters and it now feels like everyone is just blindly preparing for battles. Sansa has been abused for the most part of the show in different ways by different people, but it all adds up. This would be the time for that to be shown.

Her deep distrust for the South and her independent (not on the back of Robb being previously crowned) belief that the North needs independence could be properly established. The lessons she learned from the likes of Cersei and Littlefinger could be put into practise. Instead we get an odd catfight which always seems to revolve around Jon and forgets their independent stories.

(And I get that at this point Jon is the closest thing there is to a main character but it doesn't change the storylines of the first seven seasons.)

On the other hand, there's Dany, who has been told all her life that she had a right to Westoros and has arrived and been promptly told to fuck off. She presents an opposing view to Sansa. She is a military force she gives orders, but leaves it too Tyrion and Varys to handle the politics of running a country. Cunning and planning are not what she does best and that does actually lead her to butt heads with Sansa. One of the few things I think they did right, although the entire interaction was laced with an odd cattiness and placing Jon in the middle didn't help that.

It all boils down to right vs duty.

Dany feels she has the right to the throne through her bloodline, which should have lead to some form of tension with Jon that just didn't happen. Sansa feels the North should be independent because her duty is to the North and that is what she feels is best for it. The Starks have been its protectors for generations and she will do what she needs to do to carry it on.

And maybe this is just a general extension of the motifs of duty and honour which have always circulated the Stark family but it feels different with Sansa. She was so ready to give it up to go South and marry Joffrey, but found that she would always be a Northerner at heart.

Whereas, while Dany may have been born on Westorosi soil, she is not Westorosi. She does not know its people or its customs, especially in the North.

Which then leads to, which I imagine may have been the original point of the show: a nuanced discussion on what a monarch should be in relation to their people. A ruler or a protector. Even in Season 1, it was clear that Robert was the ruler and Eddard was the protector and I really wish that contrast had been carried through in different characters.

OK, rant over.

Actually rant not over. This entire storyline is why the Sansa vs Daenerys dialogue is clogged with Jonsa vs Jonerys instead of the actual conflicts between the two characters.

#game of thrones #sansa stark #daenerys targaryen #jon snow #season 8 #08x01 #a song of ice and fire

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Ranking the 5 sons of Ragnar

1. Ubbe: Just a nice guy. Is actually a good husband and a better father to Bjorn's kids than Bjorn himself. Tried so hard in the settlements on Iceland and Greenland. Loves his misses as much as I do.

2. Ivar: Not necessarily a good guy, but has a lot of character growth and probably the most interesting of the five. I just really loved his arc.

3. Hvitserk: Always felt the most human out of all his brothers. Struggled with the constant violence and their position in that society.

4. Sigurd: Literally no opinion. Bit of an idiot for pissing off Ivar but that's it really.

5. Bjorn: I can't truly explain my hatred for Bjorn. His wives were always more badass than him. His daughter dies and he just doesn't care. Makes shitty decision after shitty decision. I just don't like the man and began to enjoy the show more once he died. He's just a whiny fuck. Similar to how much I hated Jon Snow by the time season 8 had finished.

#vikings #hvitserk #ivar the boneless #ubbe lothbrok #sigurd #bjorn ironside #ragnar

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My Problem with the Hobbit Trilogy

The Hobbit trilogy are hardly bad films. And for younger or slightly less Tolkien obsessed viewers they are enjoyable. But for fans beyond Peter Jackson's universe they are far from the Lord of the Rings trilogy.

The multiple problems with the films can be simplified into one major issue: There is too much of a focus on conflict both in interpretation of the source material and added story lines.

The largest addition is Azog, which is an expansion of a touched upon idea in the book, but it's more of a faceless threat. It infers that the conflicts between elves, men and dwarves aren't as important as the characters involved believe. It gives perspective and links the quest to the wider world but isn't a story line in itself.

Making it a whole story line with named characters, relationships and motivations isn't necessarily a bad idea, but it changes the tone of the story. The Lord of the Rings were written to be darker and the original trilogy did a pretty good job of getting that. But the Hobbit is a children's book and there are ways of making dark moments in a story to appeal to older audiences, without making it dark overall.

One of the slightly more infamous additions to the story, is the dreaded love triangle. The addition of Legolas to these movies makes sense. It's his home, of course he'd be around. Secondly, more female representation was needed and a contrast to Bard's daughters and Galadriel was a good shout. But the romance wasn't. She didn't need to be in love with Kili to care whether the dwarves lived or died.

For me personally, when this dynamic was introduced we had only just met Tauriel and I didn't yet care about her, and we had only known Kili for a movie and a bit. The character I knew best and had the most invested in was Legolas. So to me this wasn't a tragic love story. This was a girl that fell so madly in love after like a day, that she knowingly endangered the life of the only heir to the last Elvenking east of the sea. She ran knowing he loved her and knowing he would follow her and still didn't see the issue. Then later when she stood surrounded by dead elves, and the Thranduil refused to risk anymore she attacked him. She had such potential as a character who pushed the boundaries of authority to do what was right and instead she came out as immature and selfish.

Ok rant over

And Thranduil's character. Of course he wasn't ok with them going to release a maybe alive maybe dead fire-breathing dragon. He's king of a forest. A very flammable forest. Why was he presented as evil for that? Why was he presented as bad at all?

OK now the rants over.

#lotr #lord of the rings #legolas #thranduil #the hobbit #bilbo baggins #thorin #jrr tolkien #tauriel #azog #kili

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Movie Legolas: I feel a tingle in my finger. I think its effecting me.

Book Legolas: Fuck salted pork! Where’s the fucking wine?

#lotr #lord of the rings #legolas #the two towers #wine #meriadoc brandybuck #peregrine took #gimli #thranduil oropherion

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The Grishaverse and Derry Girls crossover we all need

Just this entire episode but instead of Catholics vs Protestants its Grisha vs Drüskelle

This is when Nina seduces Matthias.

#shadow and bone #derry girls #netflix #channel 4 #grishaverse #grisha #druskelle #the darkling #general kirigan #alexander morozova #ivan x fedyor #nina zenik #matthias helvar #fedyor kaminsky #genya safin #david kostyk #ivan shadow and bone #zoya nazyanelsky #the grisha trilogy #leigh bardugo #sab

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Is there an Admiral Croft appreciation society???

#persuasion #Jane austen #jane austen #anne elliot #captain wentworth #mr elliot #admiral croft #Sophia croft #pride and prejudice #sense and sensibility #emma #northanger abbey #Mansfield park #literature #reading

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The real Culture War isn't progressive vs conservative. It's Vanyar vs Avari

Change my fucking mind.

#lotr #lord of the rings #tolkien #jrr tolkien #elves #legolas #thranduil #the silmarillion #feanor #finwe #galadriel #mirkwood #valinor #aman #valar #middle earth #fingolfin #finarfin #maglor #maedhros #progressive #conservative #culture war #vanyar #avari #moriquendi

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Women in The Silmarillion

It's not that women are under-represented, it's just that most women in their right minds wouldn't go anywhere near that shit show.

#galadriel doesn't count #she was always fucking mental #lotr #lord of the rings #the silmarillion #tolkien #feanor #finwe #fingolfin #finarfin #maglor #finrod #jrr tolkien

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So I read the Silmarillion and this is all I could think about when reading the Ruin of Doriath, so I wrote it down.

Link: The Tale of the Ruin of Doriath

#lotr imagine #lotr #lord of the rings #legolas #gimli #aragorn #gandalf #boromir #the silmarillion #fandom #fanfiction #tolkien elves #doriath #thranduil oropherion #thranduil #oropher #the fellowship of the ring #jrr tolkien

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LOTR Elf Headcanons

Disclaimer: I love the LOTR trilogy but this is how I prefer to imagine the elves from the books.

-They're inhumanly tall. Like, over 7ft.

-If you're not used to them, then they're fucking terrifying. Aragorn doesn't get it.

-Creepily quiet. They are not inclined to fill the silence with unnecessary talk. It makes humans uncomfortable.

-They have Angelina Jolie's Maleficent cheekbones.

-They're not telepathic, but you still get the distinct feeling that they're talking about you.

-By the Lord of the Rings, they are so rare that many believe they do not exist. The elves take advantage of this, and scare the shit out of humans regularly.

-They really like sex. I cannot explain this one, it's just in their vibe.

-Don't like being touched by people they don't know, but if you do know them well, then they have no sense of personal space.

There are more but I can't remember

#tolkien #lord of the rings #elrond #galadriel #celeborn #legolas #thranduil #elladan #elrohir #arwen #mirkwood #tolkien elves #lotr

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Something That Makes Me Sad

The idea that the Silvan elves in Lorien lost their culture and traditions while under Noldor/Sindar rule.

Imagine the Lorien elves visiting the Woodland Realm after the War of the Ring and Thranduil purposely inviting them when there is some sort of Silvan festival going on. He just assumes that similarly to his people, despite Sindar/Noldor rule, they would still observe it. But they don't and they have forgotten how to celebrate it. They see the Mirkwood elves celebrating as they had done millennia ago and how the House of Oropher have embraced it and not sanitised* it.

Thranduil drinking with highest ranking silvans and laughing loudly in a completely undignified way. Legolas dances with his people and smokes the sweet smelling herbs that make your brain go numb. Yes, they can play the part of the Sindar Lord very well, but their hearts' rest with their people, not with their lineage.

They meet Thranduil's Silvan Queen (she's alive and Silvan and I won't take any criticisms on this), who drapes her legs over her husbands and rests her head on his shoulder when she gets sleepy. The Lorien elves could not imagine their own Lord and Lady acting in such a way in public.

In conclusion, while the Sindar may have brought order to the Silvan elves, in Mirkwood they did so without compromising what made them Silvan to begin with. The Sindar are just there because the Silvan's don't know how to negotiate a trade deal, which is fair enough considering that isn't exactly an everyday skill.

*The word 'sanitised' is not a COVID joke. When colonial powers would go into areas, they would often force changes upon cultural traditions to bring them into line with their own culture.

#lord of the rings #Thranduil #tolkien #oropher #celeborn #lothlorien #mirkwood #eryn lasgelan #silvan elves #sindar #noldor #lotr #legolas

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I have a question

Did anyone ever acknowledge the fact that the Prince of the Woodland Realm threatened the life of the new heir to the thrown of Rohan?

Is this why nobody mentions Thranduil? Because Legolas is a diplomatic disaster?

#legolas #aragorn #thranduil #eomer of rohan #lotrdaily #lord of the rings #the two towers

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Silvan elves in Valinor anyone??

I need Silvan elves in Valinor fan fiction. Like, what do they do? Who do they piss off?

I can just imagine them rocking up later than everyone else, not really giving a fuck. They completely reject the Noldor and Sindar traditions and customs and just go and find a forest somewhere.

Sometimes they come out for special occasions but purposely try and piss off as many high and mighty pricks as possible. (They make a drinking game out of it.) And those high and mighty pricks always turn to Oropher, Thranduil or Legolas to try and get them to stop, but they just join in.

They get drunk, smoke all sorts of fun herbs and just generally enjoy their lives now they aren't plagued by the darkness.

The Valar get really pissy about it too, except Yavanna because she joins in. So does Radagast.

#lotr #legolas #thranduil #oropher #yavanna #valar #silvan elves #tolkein #noldor #sindar #valinor

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He would have ordered the most complicated, obnoxious drink and he would have done it with no fucking shame.

Thranduil and Gimli would have bonded over their shared embarrassment to be seen with him as they sip plain black coffee.

rip Legolas he would’ve loved Starbucks

#legolas #thranduil #starbucks #lord of the rings #gimli

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I've been getting back into the Tolkien fandom recently, but this time I'm actually trying to learn the lore and stuff, not just reread and rewatch The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. All I've learnt so far is that Sindar elves make love and Silvan elves fuck. That is my one take from a days worth of research.

(Also a Silvan elf will fuck you under a tree.)

#lord of the rings #lotr shitpost #legolas #thranduil #elvenking #elves #tolkein #jrr tolkien #lotr