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fangurlingismyforte · a day ago
hi! may I request a cute fluffy one shot with Obi Wan where the reader (f) is overworking herself and doesn't slow down until Obi Wan comes back from work and forges her to take a break? maybe some cute cuddles 🥺
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Request #1
Pairing: Obi-Wan Kenobi x f!reader
Warnings: angst but happy ending, fluff
A/N: Hope you like it. Let me know what you think. Also you can request Marvel or Star Wars fan fiction in here.
Things were hard lately. Even harder than usual, when you consider being a Jedi was never meant to be easy. But being a Jedi in love was tiring, frustrating and heartbreaking when every night you’re falling asleep with the thought of what could be if it wasn’t for one stupid rule. Stupid it might be, but it was so crucial to the way of Jedi.
All you can do now is bury yourself in work, training to distract yourself from these feelings. It wasn’t possible, it never will be, and you needed to get over it before it can cause any more problems in your life.
It was almost impossible not to think about him when suddenly you seemed to see him everywhere. He was everywhere. In the training rooms, in the hallways, on your missions with you, in your head, in your heart. The blue eyes and charming smile of Master Obi-Wan Kenobi were haunting your dreams, and there was nothing you can do about it. Only learn how to live with it, and deal with it better.
You almost thought that he was seeking you out, never too far from you, always appearing out of nowhere. His lingering touches on your shoulder, arm or waist when he passes by were driving you crazy. And the more you tried to avoid him, the more you saw of him. You almost wanted to scream at his handsome face to leave you alone, but you knew that was the last thing you really wanted.
So, yet again, distraction was your best choice, the best medicine for what seemed to be an unsolvable situation. Your face was sweaty, just like your hands that were gripping the hilt of your lightsaber. Swinging the glowing blade furiously, your eyes were on the three training droid firing shots at you.
You were good, never losing focus, head always in the game. But it didn’t seem to be the case this late afternoon. Exhaustion was taking its toll on you, because you rather lose sleep than dream of him, of Obi-Wan. You didn’t want to feel his hands on you, his lips on you when you close your eyes, because waking up to reality is hard.
What didn’t help either, was the fact that Obi-Wan was now quietly standing in the corner of the room. His hands crossed on his chest, eyes never leaving your fighting form. It was nerve-racking and it didn’t take long after you realized he was there, for you to lose focus, while one shot hit you right in the shoulder. Quietly swearing, the droids automatically turned off, while you sunk down to one knee, beyond exhausted.
“That was good,” you heard him say, while he slowly came closer. “But I think you should also take a break once in a while.”
Looking over your shoulder, you gifted him with a glare, to which he just smiled. You weren’t in a mood for this. Not now, perhaps not ever. Without saying anything, you stood up, slightly swaying on your feet, when darkness overtook your vision for a split moment. Activating your lightsaber, you got ready again to train, but he was still standing close. “Do you mind?” you asked and waved your hand over to the droids.
“I do, actually,” he said as a matter of fact, and you turned your whole body to him, waiting for elaboration. “You are hurting yourself. I think this was enough training for at least a couple of days.”
Your eyebrows furrowed when you saw the familiar look on his face. “You seemed to think I’m your padawan.”
“No, I just don’t want you to get hurt. This is not going to help your problems.”
Breathing heavily, you clutched your weapon in a deadly grip. “I don’t have a problem.”
He laughed shortly. “I think we both have a problem. The same one."
“No,” you turned around, being completely done with this conversation, but your lightsaber suddenly flew out of your hands, right to Obi-Wan’s. Flabbergasted beyond belief, you turned around to him. “How dare you.”
“I dare, when there’s no reasoning with you,” his eyebrows slightly furrowed. “Care should about your own health a little bit.”
“Maybe you should stop caring about it,” you snapped, annoyed, irritated, sweaty and so, so tired.
“That would be impossible, and you know it,” he said it with such a gentle undertone in his voice, your knees almost buckled under your weight.
“Stop saying things like that,” you run your hands through your sweaty hair. “Stop being…everywhere.”
He smiled lightly, but there was something like sadness in his eyes. “I tried. I tried so hard, but I can’t. You are…you are like a magnet, pulling me in, and…”
“Stop, please, just stop,” you mumbled. You couldn’t listen to him.
“Alright, alright. I understand you don’t want to talk about it now, but soon we have to. We can’t go on like this,” he said, and you just sighed, knowing that he’s right. But it was such a dreaded conversation. Do you really need to hear that you can’t be together? That this relationship is just a fantasy, and nothing more. As if he could hear your thoughts, he reached out and took both of your hands in his. “We can make it work. I promise, we can…we have a choice. And as far as I’m concerned, I’m going to choose you,” gently he brought your hands to his lips and kissed your knuckles.
You had no words, no thought, just his intense, expressive eyes watching you. He was like a drug, intoxicating your senses. With hooded eyes, you nodded slightly and squeezed his hands.
“Come,” he whispered and let go of your hands. He went to leave the room, and without a thought, you followed him. Your eyes were on his back this whole time when you were walking through the hallways of the Jedi Temple. You weren’t able to pay attention to anyone you passed by, or anything that happened. Only when you were in front of Obi-Wan’s room, you seemed to snap out of any trance you found yourself to be in.
“No, I shouldn’t…” you started, but he stopped you when he grabbed your hand.
“Please, just for a little while,” his voice was once again so gentle, just above a whisper, and you can’t say no. How could you, when he was watching you with so much hope, and so much…love?
“Fine,” you nodded and entered the room. It looked just like yours. As a matter of fact, every Jedi had the same plain room with one dresser, a table, a chair and a bed. But something in the room just seemed different. Maybe it was just the fact that everything smelled like him, that it was his. And you loved everything about him, even his room that was almost vibrating with his force signature.
His hands were still holding yours, when he led you to his bed, making you sit on it. You almost couldn’t breathe, when he kneeled down in front of you and started to take off your boots. The air was almost cracking with the intensity of the whole situation, and the fact that he was watching you the whole time was not helping either.
“Lay down,” he said when both of your boots were off. Somehow, you couldn’t find a reason to object. After all, this is what you wanted. To fall asleep with him, to wake up with him, to be with him. When you laid down on his pillow, his scent was overwhelming to you, and when he took off his own shoes and laid down next to you, your heart was almost painfully beating against your ribcage.
He wanted to be as near as possible to you, that much was evident, when he pulled you to his chest. The fabric of his robes covering his chest was softly pressing against your cheek. Hearing his heartbeat was the most beautiful melody in the whole world. Just the fact that he existed, that he was.
“I was dreaming of this,” you found yourself saying, hugging his torso and entangling your legs with his. “And it hurt me so much because I knew it would never happen.”
“It can be like that every day, every night. It's up to us. Up to you, if you’ll have me,” he whispered, and run his hands through your hair.
You sighed and looked up at him. “I want nothing more.”
He smiled and kissed your forehead, pressing his lips to your skin gently, but with urgency. “Then we can make it work. Even if it means walking away from all of this,” he meant the Jedi Order. And for you, in this very moment, everything was possible, because you were in Obi-Wan’s arms. He wanted to be with you, and his body heat was slowly but surely lulling you to sleep.
A dreamless sleep, because the main character was laying there next to you.
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fangurlingismyforte · a day ago
Text
omg OKAY
𝙎𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝗈𝖿 𝗟𝗼𝘃𝗲 | seven
Parings: CEO!Chris Hemsworth x Stripper!OC // Words: 7.8K // Type: Series // Taglist: Yes/No (Inbox me to be tagged or removed) Warnings: Sexual harassment, racial themes, discussions pertaining to child death, miscarriage, alcohol/drug use, and suicide attempts. Angst.
A/N: I'm so sorry for the inexcusable delay in updates. This chapter is hella long and perhaps should have been split into two, but I promised ya'll some answers in the last chapter, so here they are!
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“What is that haircut?”
“Why are you zooming in?”
Kaya said nothing, continuing to pinch her fingers to gain a closer look, her smile widening by the second. “Holy shit, you weren’t kidding. “
Chris rolled his eyes. “All children go through phases.”
“This is beyond a phase, my friend. Don’t even get me started on the outfit.” As she erupted in yet another fit of giggles, he took advantage of the opportunity to snatch the iPad away from her.
“Go to sleep.”
Quieting herself down, she wiped at her eyes. “No. Come on. I’m enjoying this, and like you said, you were a dumb kid. How were you supposed to know these photos would haunt you till’ the end of time?”
“Only if they get out.”
“Don’t tempt me with a good time, sir.”
Chris closed the app and looked over at her. “What about you?”
Kaya’s brow lifted. “What about me?”
“What about your phases?”
She snorted. “Absolutely not.” He continued to stare her down, prompting her to cave, a surprising move even for her. Kaya’s tenacity was typically much stronger than that. “Fine.”
She grabbed her phone and unlocked it, opening Google Photos and scrolling mindlessly. She knew that any horrifically embarrassing snapshots would be from as far back as her library went. The older the photo, the higher the likelihood she would regret ever caving.
It took roughly two minutes for her to locate a set, her eyes shutting and a small moan leaving her partially closed mouth.
He smirked. “Found it?”
“Shut up.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
“You’re going to make me regret this, aren’t you?”
“Without a doubt.”
She couldn’t help it. She laughed. “At least you’re honest.” Blowing out a breath, she issued a formal forewarning. “In my defense, I was young and dumb.”
“How is that diff—fine, I will reserve my judgment.”
“Liar.” When he said nothing else, she took another deep breath and gradually pulled her phone away from her breast, twisting her wrist so that he could see the screen. “I give you, thebaddestputa69.”
She watched the corner of his lips lift upward as he fought off a smile in favor of a smirk. “Hotmail or aol?” Her surprise at his knowledge of the fallen email servers must have shown because he commented, “I’m old, not ancient.”
She matched his smirk and leaned over to whisper. “Hotmail. Definitely hotmail.”
“AIM username?”
“Come on, the same as my email. I wasn’t creative enough to have multiple aliases.”
He chuckled, grabbing her phone to examine the photo. “I certainly do not miss the peace sign era.”
“I’m pretty sure I used that same pose in all of my photos back then.”
He gestured to the plastered graphic that read ‘jealousy is a disease, get well soon’. “With the same masterful level of editing, I’m sure.”
“But of course, blingee and picnik were a staple.”
A comfortable silence befell them as he returned her phone, and she quickly swiped up to close the app. Kaya was grateful that he didn’t swipe right or left, something she was expecting him to do, if she was being completely honest with herself.
Kaya yawned and naturally laid her head on his shoulder as she reached over to grab the book she was reading when they somehow got on the topic of rebellious and wild phases of days of past.
“Are we th—”
“Finish that sentence, and I will personally throw you out of this damn plane myself.”
Kaya looked over at him, eyebrows furrowed, and mouth pronounced. “It’s a legitimate question.”
“No, it was a legitimate question. However, it stopped being one when you asked me the fifth time.”
“I’m just trying to keep the conversation going. Damn.”
“No, you’re just trying to pester me.”
“Look, it’s obvious you don’t want to hear me talk anymore, so I’m just going to shut my mouth for the remainder of the flight.” He snorted. “What?”
“We both know that’s not possible.” He finally broke his gaze from his phone as he looked over with that knowing smirk that she despised. “You always have to have the last word.”
“That is not true.”
“Kaya, you’re like a child.”
“Keep it up, and you’ll be the one who’s personally tossed from this jet.”
“See what I mean.”
Groaning, she threw her hands up and shook the book in her right hand. “This is the second book in this series.”
“And?”
“And I started the series when we were still on the taxi.”
He shrugged. “Read slower.”
“Chris!”
He laughed, reaching to place his hand on her thigh as she sighed while banging her head back against the headrest. “Relax.”
“Don’t you think if I could, I would?”
“You were doing great five minutes ago.”
“That was in the past.”
“Next time, we’re taking separate jets.”
She didn’t know why but hearing him refer to future happenings both excited and saddened her, for more reasons than one. She cleared her throat. “This is a work trip, right?” He looked down at her as she placed the book down on the ground and held onto his bicep. “You know, something for your company.”
He studied her for a moment and looked up, closing his eyes as he laid his head back against the headrest. “I have the cover of this month’s GQ Italia.”
“Fancy,” she remarked, still unsatisfied with his answer-non answer. “So, I was right. This is a work thing.”
Chris thought about what she said, what she asked, as well as his response before he replied. “They offered to contract a photographer in LA.”
Brows scrunched, she had to ask, now more confused than she was just a few minutes ago. “So why go to them?”
His silence only irked her, the seconds dragging into minutes, which felt like hours. Frustrated and impatient, she called his name again. “Chris-”
“Jesus,” was all she heard before his lips were on hers, palm of his hand pressed against her cheek. Everything else after that was a sensual blur. His other hand moved to her hip, pulling her onto his lap, never once breaking their kiss. She placed her hands on his shoulders, giving a light squeeze, inching her body closer to his, close enough to feel the heat that always emanated over him.
And then, it was over.
Eyes fluttering and breath staggering, she nearly whined when he ran his thumb over her swollen bottom lip.
“This isn’t work for me.”
----
“This is our room?”
Chris looked up and chuckled, watching Kaya spin around the middle, eyes soaking in their suite. He placed her bag near the closet while crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.
“It is.”
Kaya nodded and grabbed the bottom of her sweatshirt, tugging it over her head. She extended her arm out and turned around, lifting a brow. “And we have maid service, correct?”
He eyed her. “Of course.”
Kaya smirked and let the garment fall to the floor.
Chris chuckled. “You wanna explain that?”
“What?” She played innocent, fingers toying with the waistband of her joggers as she began to shimmy out of them. “Staying in a fancy hotel where I don’t have t0 clean up after myself?” She walked toward him, moving to grab her suitcase so that she could find her next outfit. “Granted, we have the maid service at home, but—” Both Christopher and Kaya paused at her statement, equally surprised by how easily it flowed, but more so with the statement itself.
Defense immediately kicked in and Kaya cleared her throat. “I mean, ya know, your place.” She refused to make eye contact that exceeded ten seconds, grabbing the handle of her suitcase and dragging it in the direction of what looked like the bathroom.
“Dibs.”
Her feet weren’t moving fast enough for her liking. In fact, they were slow enough that Chris was somehow able to cross the room and grab her by her arm. She looked up, managing to remain calm while inwardly panicking.
God, please don’t let him ask anything.
“Don’t take too long.”
She swallowed. “Why?”
Her grip on the handle tightened when he moved his hand to her face, the back of it brushing against her cheek. Had he been paying close enough attention, he would have noticed the way she shivered at his touch.
“You want dinner, don’t you?”
-----
“This isn’t exactly what I meant.”
Kaya looked up from her pizza, pausing mid chew. “What? Pizza in Italy? This is goals.”
He intended to take her to a fine restaurant, one where only the elite could afford to dine. Instead, she requested pizza delivered to their room. Kaya never ceased to surprise him. “And why are you eating pizza with a fork?”
She shrugged, adjusting the thin strap of her shirt. “Because pizza is messy, and my life's already messy enough. I avoid when I can.”
Chris didn’t say anything, simply watching her eat. She caught his gaze and looked away. If she could, she’d go back in time and stop herself from ever saying what she did. It’d ruined everything. He’d been acting different around her since, and she hated that. She also hated that she hated it.
Since when did she give a flying fuck about what people thought of her? Let alone him.
It was out of character for her, and she didn’t like it.
She didn’t like it at all.
Similarly, Chris also found it difficult to focus on anything other than the encounter from earlier, but not for the reasons Kaya thought.
Not even close.
“So, what’s the agenda for this trip?”
He chuckled and brought the champagne to his lips. “And ruin the surprise?”
Her eyes narrowed as she replaced the fork with her fingers so that she could eat the crust piece by piece. “What surprise?”
“What kind of question is that? Who gives away a surprise?”
“Are you capable of ever just answering my questions with a straight answer?”
He pretended to think. “I could.”
“But?”
“Where’s the fun in that?”
“You and fun? Never realized they were synonymous.”
“I’d like to think we have fun.”
“We have sex. Really, really, great sex.”
“You don’t consider that fun?”
“Fun isn’t a strong enough word to describe it.” He lifted a brow, and she scoffed, tossing a red pepper packet in his direction. “Stop it. I am trying to have a mature conversation here.”
“Not quite sure how possible that is when both parties are inebriated.”
“Bullshit. You know damn well neither one of us is drunk. You haven’t seen me drunk. Hell, I haven’t seen me drunk in a while.”
The way her tone changed toward the end of her sentence garnered his interest. “Why not?”
She looked at him, her smile faltering as she nervously cleared her throat. “I—uh—I get really bad migraines, and Excedrin is the only thing that works for me.” Telling him the truth, well, a fraction of the truth, felt strange yet relieving, probably because she’d spent so much of her life hiding and lying that the truth was unfamiliar territory. “Needless to say, meds and alcohol? Never really a good combo.”
“You’re drinking now.”
“I haven’t taken any medicine yet.”
“Maybe you won’t have to.”
She smiled sadly. “I will.” A beat. “It’s all I have.” Kaya snatched another piece of her crust and swallowed fully before explaining. “That’s why my sleep schedule, if you can even call it that, is so fucked up.”
He thought about it. “Excedrin has caffeine.”
“An insane amount.”
“It helps your migraines—”
“And keeps me up in return.” When he grew quiet, she offered. “Trust me. The insomnia is much better than the pain.”
“I’m sorry.”
She grimaced, eyes darting in either direction. “Why?”
He sighed and ran his hands all over his face. “That’s why you get so upset when I wake you up.”
“I wouldn’t say upset.”
“You threatened to slit my throat in my sleep.”
“Okay, maybe I was a little upset,” she confessed, and they shared a laugh before his tone grew serious again.
“I’ll be mindful of that.” Head tilted to the side, a sign she was still confused, he continued. “So that you can sleep.”
She smiled teasingly, abandoning the last bit of her food, and pushing her plate to the side. “Is that consideration I hear?”
“It is.”
The way he was looking at her, the lack of typical sarcasm in his tone, it was both welcoming and conflicting. Crawling across the floor, she moved his plate to the side and climbed into his lap.
Hands on his shoulders, she lowered her voice and whispered into his ear. “Well, I’m up right now.”
He made a sound and brought his hands to her hips. “You are.” Her eyes shut when his lips moved to her shoulder. “You should get some sleep.”
Immediately, she coiled back and glared. “Are you serious right now?” He laughed, which only upset her further as he stood up, her legs locking around his waist. “It’s been at least 8 hours.”
“You keeping a timer or something?”
“Look.” She waited for him to place her on the bed before she grabbed the bottom of his shirt and tugging so that he laid back on the mattress. She quickly climbed on top of him. “If there’s one thing I know about us, we are ideal intimate partners. Our sexual chemistry is astronomical.”
His eyes drank her in. “Is that it?”
“Is what it?”
His voice lowered. “Is that all you think we have?”
At that moment, Kaya realized a couple of things. This was wrong. She was suddenly very much uncomfortable. And this was a mistake. This was why she didn’t tell the truth. It meant putting yourself at risk for being vulnerable.
She was never good with that.
Clearing her throat, she climbed off him and flashed a crafty smile. “I’m gonna go shower.” She couldn’t handle seeing his face, so she turned around, purposely pretending she had to look around the room to search for her luggage.
“You should know I hate sleeping with blankets.” Kaya needed to redirect the conversation to another topic. This was becoming all too much for her.
He sat up and rolled his shoulders. “So, strip the bed? Got it.”
“Absolutely not. I could freeze.”
“You just said—”
Kaya stood by the door that led to the living room area and smiled sadly. “I’m a hot ass mess, Chris.” A beat. “The sooner you accept that, the better.”
-------
We need to talk when you get a chance. Please?
No matter how many times she looked at the phone, a new incoming gray message never appeared. She waited and waited, even scrolling up only for it to bounce back with no change.
She missed Nia. She missed their banter. She missed making tik toks with her. And she especially missed the advice giving, of which she could desperately use right about now.
Something was happening between them. With her and Chris. Of which she didn’t know, nor did she understand. It drove her mad because it was a new experience, one where she didn’t feel as though she always had to walk on eggshells.
Being with Chris….
“God.” She ran her hand over her face. What the hell was she doing? She wasn’t with Chris. Not like that, anyway. This was a business transaction. They were both using each other for selfish purposes.
Maybe it was the sex. Nia always warned her that behind every sexual encounter, there was at least some trace of feelings.
Kaya always thought that was bullshit.
Now….now she wasn’t so sure.
“You alright?”
She looked up from her chair and saw Chris walk in. She chewed the inside of her cheek as he sat down in the chair opposite of her. Kaya took in his wardrobe, so casual and laid back. She’d never seen him in denim before, but he looked good.
She didn’t even know the photographer, but she was a fan. A billionaire in Levi’s? Iconic.
“How does it feel to dress like us common folk?”
“Poor.” He winked as she glared. “We should be done soon.”
“Don’t rush on my part. The snacks here are delicious, and who knows, I could play dress up.” She wiggled her brows and straightened when there was a knock on the door.
“Sorry to interrupt,” the photographer spoke up and offered Kaya a friendly smile. “You’re Kaya, yes? I’m Elena.”
Kaya was surprised by the fact that this woman was both speaking to her and actually knew who she was, so her response was delayed. “Yes. It’s nice to meet you.” She offered her hand and noticed the woman was staring at her. Welp. It was nice while it lasted. “Is there something I can help you with?”
“I’m sorry,” she apologized but continued to stare. “It’s just...has anyone ever told you that you have amazing bone structure?”
Kaya sputtered. “Not unless they wanted something from me.”
Elena smiled. “Well, I suppose this is no different.”
“I don’t understand,” Kaya asked, looking over at Chris. He was surprisingly quiet.
“How about we get some shots of the both of you?”
She immediately protested. “Oh no. I—I’m just here for moral support.”
“You did say you wanted to play dress up,” he reminded. She glared. Of course he would choose to speak up now.
She turned her narrowed eyes on him and harshly whispered. “Not while being photographed.”
He placed his hand over hers. “Relax.”
Kaya remembered that they weren’t alone and therefore, had to keep up the act. Even if it was starting to feel less and less like acting.
“I’m used to people watching, not photographing.” He lifted a brow. Laughing, she slapped his chest and took a deep breath. She looked over at Elena. “Will I at least get to see them before you pick which ones to use? If any.”
“Of course.”
Kaya caved. “Fine.” He kissed the top of her head and mouthed a thank you. “You owe me.”
“Sure, I do,” he dismissed, slapping her on her ass as Elena grabbed her to drag her away.
“Time to make magic.”
-----
It was a bad idea, one of many that had occurred, Kaya realized.
When she joked about wanting to play dress—up, she didn’t think that it would actually happen. She didn’t think that she’d become involved in his shoot. Kaya especially didn’t expect to have as much….fun as she did.
And she hated that, too. The fact that she managed to smile and laugh more in one setting than she had in, hell, longer than she could remember. She didn’t like it. She didn’t like it at all.
She really, really didn’t like the way Chris looked at her every time she walked onto set in a new look, and there were a couple of them. The way he focused on her, eyes taking in every bit of her form, all the way down from her shoes up to her hair. Like he didn’t want to look away. Like he couldn’t look away. She despised the way he held her when they were photographed together, often being the reason for her smile or laughter with his comments that he whispered into her ear, sneaking in a kiss against her temple or holding her against him.
It was all so domestic and sweet, and it made no sense.
He was starting to make no sense.
And she especially didn’t understand why she was putting off leaving the bathroom, having sat on the toilet for at least 15 minutes.
As if on cue, two loud knocks on the door pulled her from her thoughts.
“I’m coming, damnit.”
“That’s what you said last time. Come on, Kaya.” She was both surprised and annoyed that it was Chris. She expected it to be members of the glam team that he’d hired to help her prepare for the GQ function he was invited to, and of course, she was forced to accompany him. Turns out he wasn’t just chosen for the cover. He was man of the year. “We’re going to be late.”
“Maybe you should just leave me behind,” she muttered.
“Maybe I can just kick this damn door down,” he countered.
“Then you’ll have to pay for the damages.”
“Then I’ll buy the damn hotel,” he shot back testily. “I’m not going to ask you again, Kaya.”
She scowled and rolled her neck. Kaya knew he was being serious. The bastard could buy his way out of anything.
If only….
Blowing out a deep breath, she swallowed and stood, holding up her dress. It was undoubtedly beautiful, gold, a slit in the middle of her chest and on her left leg exposing more skin than she would have thought appropriate. Her curls were styled in a fancy updo, and her makeup was equally as bold as her dress, finalized with a red lip. She knew that she looked good, and that’s what scared her.
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Chris had been looking at her like that all day, and she couldn’t keep handling it.
If she could even consider it handling. Managing was perhaps a better term. Poorly managing was the perfect term.
Kaya ripped open the door and plastered on a fake smile. “Happy?”
And there it was, his eyes widened and softened as he gave her a onceover. “And don’t tell me I look beautiful, cause’ I already know it.”
Kaya figured if she said it for him, she wouldn’t have to deal with the weird and uncomfortable knotting in her stomach that she experienced every time he complimented her.
And it worked, he said nothing, only helping to hold up her dress as they walked to the SUV that would escort them. In the car, she was also pleasantly surprised that he didn’t attempt to make small talk with her during the drive. She was certain, however, that it was because he took at least three different work calls during that time.
She made drafted Tik Toks in the meantime.
When they finally arrived, Kaya nearly ran out of the car right then and there.
“Is that a red carpet?” Her mouth dropped. “What the hell? You said nothing about having to walk a damn carpet that is red.”
He chuckled. Kaya realized his hand was on the exposed portion of her thigh. “Stay close to me, and I’ll take care of you. You’ll be fine.”
Kaya was used to having eyes on her, but that didn’t mean she liked it, especially when it didn’t involve money being thrown her way. “I don’t have to say anything, do I?”
He squeezed her thigh. “You’ll most likely receive compliments.”
“I can handle that,” she spoke more to herself than him. “Just long as no one asks if I prefer cats over dogs or whatever shit they ask.”
He laughed quietly and looked at her. “You ready?”
No. “Yes.”
Chris climbed out the car first so that he could help her out of the vehicle, and as soon as she stepped out, she cursed to herself. There were so many damn people. People taking photographs. People being photographed. People helping both the people the photographed and the photographers. And then there was her. She felt so out of place.
If he wasn’t already holding her hand, she would have grabbed for his.
Kaya used her left hand to hold up her dress, while making sure that she stayed close to Chris who led the way, smiling for the camera while sparing her glances every so often to assess her level of comfort.
Kaya played along, evoking a smile as she posed with him for a few photos. That’s when it started again. Like the photoshoot from a few hours ago, she found herself feeling less forced and more comfortable. Like, it was natural.
Like it was real.
Kaya was eventually allowed to stand to the side as he gave a few interviews, some in English, most in Italian. She’d meant to ask him earlier when the hell he learned to speak so many languages. This was the third she’d learned of. She had a feeling at least one or two journalists asked about her, because he would look in her direction and shoot a wink or something of the sort.
Her smile was a natural reaction.
The process was less daunting than she anticipated, not that she’d ever admit that to him. It was once they moved inside that Kaya realized they’d yet to reach the hard part. That hardest part was “socializing” with the guests, many of which were white, spicy white at best. She spotted some minorities but found that they were just as distant as the rest.
The vim of the event was welcoming, however, which confused Kaya to some extent. She simplified it down to the event was nice, the people were trash, and Chris was both an ass and a gentleman for forcing her to come.
He’d introduced her to a few people, most of which spoke poor English. That, she could acknowledge, was nice. Not the strained English, but his obvious concern for her wellbeing. He was going out of his way to make her feel as comfortable as he could.
It was also irritating because it resurfaced those damn knots.
They were seated at a table, and he was texting someone when she leaned over and tugged on his sleeve. Kaya also took a moment to appreciate how nice he looked. The man was something sinful in a suit. “I think I know him.”
He looked up, immediately locking his phone. “Who?”
She gestured with her chin. “The guy over there talking to the girl with the green dress. But don’t look at them.”
His eyes lifted to the ceiling. Right before he proceeded to look right in that direction.
She laughed despite her irritation. “What did I literally just fucking say?”
“I’ll never understand why people want to do something without actually doing it. I don’t have the time.” She shook her head. He was so impatient. “And how do you know him?”
She lifted a brow. He asked with a newfound sense of urgency. If she didn’t know any better, she would have guessed it came from a place of jealousy.
Kaya studied the stranger across the room again when her eyes widened. “I know. He’s that actor from that porn movie we watched.”
“We don’t watch porn, Kaya. We make it.”
“Stop it.” She leaned closer, hating that her smile contrasted the frustration she felt with how vulgar he was speaking in such a public setting. “And you know the movie where they…..ya know, basically the whole time, and he kept asking in that godawful delivery, are you lost, baby girl?”
Her equally terrible impression caused him to laugh quietly. “I think that is him.”
“I told you.” She spoke a little louder than she would have liked due to her excitement at being correct. “He looks better on screen.”
Chris glanced over at him once more and scoffed. “He’s scrawny.”
“Sir, not everyone is like you and built like a fucking tanker.”
“Not my problem.”
Kaya rolled her eyes and gathered her dress. “I’ll be back. I have to use the restroom.” She stood and leaned over, arms around him from behind as she whispered. “Try not to be too much of a dick while I’m gone, okay?”
He turned to look at her. “And where’s the fun in that?”
Turns out finding the bathroom was a harder task than she’d anticipated. She’d asked one of the servers while maneuvering through the crowd, but it also turned out that Kaya wasn’t the best with directions. She did find it, though.
Eventually.
Kaya was navigating her way back to Chris when she was stopped by a man in a suit along the way.
He was of average height, average build, and average attraction. She was immediately annoyed.
“Hi,” Kaya greeted with a tight smile.
“Hello,” he smiled. Add in average dental health. “You are very beautiful.”
Kaya realized he didn’t have an accent, either. American, most likely. “Uhh, thank you.” When she moved to walk past him, he blocked her. “Sir, I really should—”
“How much?”
Her eyes darted to either side. “I’m sorry?”
“Money is no issue, as I’m sure you can see, and I’d like you for a week.” He stepped closer, bringing his hand to trail it down her arm. “Longer even, perhaps.”
“Sir, I have no idea what you are talking about, and please do not touch me.” It wasn’t so much of a request as much as it was a demand. “Now, I really should—”
“You’re not American.” Kaya continued to be confused as hell when his eyes lit up with excitement. “That explains why you look so exotic.” Confusion easily morphed into rage as she finally caught on to what he was referring to. “I bet you feel di—”
“You’re disgusting,” she hissed, pulling away from him. “I am not a fucking prostitute—”
“Call it what you want, girl,” he dismissed. “I don’t judge. I can pay you well.”
“Go fuck yourself, you sick son of a bitch,” she cursed, turning away when he grabbed her arm. “Let me go.”
“You think that you’re special?” He’d taken on another tone, one that conveyed his anger at being rejected. “The fuckin’ stall I just pissed in is worth more than you, bitch.”
Kaya refused to allow him to see her cry, but she’d be lying if she tried to say that his words didn’t sting, especially his next verbal attack.
“You can slap on that expensive dress and let Hemsworth make you feel special, but I know, you know, and everyone else in this fucking place knows that you’re nothing but a cheap, illegal whore—” Panic arose when he moved his hand to the exposed skin of her thigh, squeezing tightly. His hand started to inch upward when Kaya acted on instinct. He cursed aloud while Kaya gasped as she realized that she’d silenced him with her fist dead square in the middle of his face. “You fucking bitch!”
Shock and fear took over as Kaya gathered the bottom of her dress and ran, as much as the gown and her heels would allow, that is. Certain he was going to chase her for retribution, she consistently looked back, unaware that she needed to be just as aware of what was in front as what was behind.
She shrieked and immediately went to pull herself away from the strong body she’d collided with.
“Kaya.” Refocusing her attention, she looked up and realized it was Chris. “Where the hell—” He stopped amid his statement when he took in her appearance and realized that she was crying. “What happened?”
“Nothing.” Kaya looked down, speaking more to herself than him. Not that it mattered. He was judging based on what he saw instead of what she said. He’d learned by now that her words rarely matched the truth. “Let’s just go—”
“Kaya,” he repeated, softer. Chris brought his hands to her face, forcing her to meet his gaze as he asked again, slowly. “What happened?” A strike of anger flashed in his blue eyes. “Did someone touch you?”
“No,” she answered, quickly. Too quickly.
The anger escalated exponentially. “Who? Tell me.”
Kaya could have slapped herself. She wasn’t helping the situation. She was making it worse. “It doesn’t matter, I hit him, and now he’s probably going to sue you—”
“Where is he?” Chris was looking behind her, eyes flaming. He was livid. “Show me. Now.”
“No.” Speaking was becoming an increasing challenge, especially against the backdrop of overwhelming emotions. Everything she’d been feeling, preventing herself from feeling, and afraid to acknowledge was gradually bubbling to the surface. “Just—just let me go back to the hotel. I’m messing everything up for you.”
He calmed for a second, realizing what was happening. Chris was unfamiliar with this side of her. Unfamiliar with seeing her so vulnerable. “What?”
Kaya suddenly realized that her eyes were burning again. She was fighting back tears. “I’ll give you back the money for the day, it’s—it’s fine, you’re better off without me here—”
Her offer to pay him incensed Chris. This wasn’t about the money. It stopped being about the money a long time ago, even if he hadn’t realized that until today. “I don’t want the fucking money, Kaya.”
She shook her head and closed her eyes. “Don’t—don’t say that.”
“Why? It’s the truth.”
“Please,” she plead. Control over her emotions was a battle she’d all but lost at that point. Her words, she was certain, would be next.
He raised his voice. Chris sensed, saw that she was uncomfortable, but he also realized that this was what she needed. A push. “Why?”
“Because this all about the fucking money, okay?” She matched his volume, accepting that her tears were going to fall no matter how much she willed them not to. She’d lost the war. “It has to be about the money, because if it isn’t then that means you care, and—you can’t, alright?”
He studied her, wondering if she realized this conversation was difficult for him too. He brought his hand to the side of her face. “Why is it so impossible for you to accept that I fucking care about you?”
She looked up, glistening eyes and wavering voice. “Because then I have to admit that I care about you too, and I can’t do that.” She spoke to herself, as if vocalizing it would cement a decision that was already out of her hands. “I won’t do it.”
“Why?” He pressed. Chris brought his other hand to the other side of her face, cupping it and moving closer. He gave zero fucks about where they were and who could have possibly overheard. “Why are you fighting this so hard?”
She pulled herself away from him, back colliding against the wall as she blurted, “because all I do is hurt the people I care about alright?” In that moment, Kaya realized she was so far gone that the point of return was no longer an option. Her mouth trembled as she struggled to form her next sentence, listing off names with her fingers as props. “Mami, Papi, Nia. Hell, my own brother is dead because of me.” A beat. “I’ll only hurt you, and I care about you too much to do that.”
“Kaya—"
A newfound heaviness started to weigh upon her chest, another blockade to her speech. “I’m standing here in a dress I can’t afford, a building I can’t even fucking pronounce, and with a man I don’t deserve.”
His voice lowered. “Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, I don’t deserve you?” Kaya looked at him, her eyes softening before she squinted, her face scrunching up in obvious pain.
He took note of this. As invested as Chris was in finally getting Kaya to open up about how she really felt, her wellbeing would always be his primary concern.
“Kaya.” He placed his hands on her waist, steadying her. “What’s wrong?”
“I—” She blinked several times, blinding lights obscuring her vision. “I—can’t—" Kaya felt the firmness of his chest, inhaled the scent of his cologne, and heard her name on his lips before everything faded to black.
-----
She awoke on her side, body clutched against a pillow, and a thin sheet covering half her body. Never one to take her time returning to her senses, she forced herself to sit up, eyes still scrunched from the sleep.
Looking down she realized she was dressed in only one of Chris’s dress shirts, her dress discarded.
Memory returned as Kaya replayed the events that transpired prior to her slumber. The photoshoot. The party. The asshole.
Chris.
“I don’t care. Tell them to send it in the mail or something.”
She recognized his voice traveling from the living room area, prompting her to swing her legs over the bed, her toes submerging into the soft carpet. She’d never been in such a fine hotel where the carpeting probably cost more than six months’ worth of rent on her one-bedroom apartment.
“Evans, I don’t give a flying fuck about any of that right now. You can handle it. I don’t care.”
Kaya contemplated remaining where she was, eavesdropping without being detected. She quickly decided against it. She’d done enough.
Her feet carried her out of the room, and she stood in the doorway where she saw he was standing against the massive window that provided a breathtaking overview of the city.
Again, she considered leaving him be, but he either had exceptional peripheral vision or caught her reflection in the window because he spun around. Kaya’s eyebrows furrowed when she realized he was still dressed in his suit, with the expectation of the jacket and dress shirt which were both discarded, leaving the white undershirt.
Uncomfortable with the way he was looking at her, more concern than that, she settled onto the sofa, pulling a decorative pillow to her chest as she crossed her legs.
“I have to go,” he spoke briefly before pulling the phone from his ear and hanging up.
Kaya swallowed. He’d yet to speak, so she took the opportunity to do so. “Still don’t believe me when I said I’m a hot mess?”
“What happened tonight, Kaya?”
“Which part?” She knew that playing coy wasn’t the best route, but she was forever stubborn and would fight until she had nothing left. “Where I ruined your evening, assaulted a millionaire, told you one of my deepest secrets, or fainted in your arms? There’s a lot.”
“All of it.”
She looked away and licked her lips. Kaya felt cornered, absolutely trapped. Emotionally. She’d always assumed being physically stuck would feel far more suffocating and frightening. She was wrong.
Kaya considered her options, though far and few in between. She could deflect. She was a master at that. She could redirect blame onto him. Call him out on even making her go on the trip, for not telling her ahead of time what to expect, maybe throw in a few insults. And lastly, the most frightening of them all, she could be honest.
That was the scariest of them all.
“I lied to you.” The words spilled out before she realized it, but Kaya accepted the fact that she was tired. There was only so much she could carry, and she’d reached her limits. “My—my parents aren’t dead. They still live in the same house in Parlier that I grew up in with Denes. He’s—he was my brother.” It felt strange talking about, verbalizing what she’d quietly struggled with for so many years. And yet, there was a peace that accompanied the release. “He was such a beautiful little boy, but….different. He didn’t talk much, life skills were….hard for him, and he had these fixations on certain things. He didn’t like change.”
“Kaya, you don’t—”
“When I was eleven, and he was eight, my parents found out they were pregnant. They’d been trying for so long….they were so happy.” She roughly wiped at her face to do away with the silent tears that fell. The crying, however, was inevitable. “One day, they had a checkup appointment, and the babysitter fell through, so they asked me to watch Denes.” She nodded slowly, reverting to the same rush of emotions she felt that day. “I was so….mad, because my friend had just gotten Guitar Hero, and I was supposed to walk down to her house so we could play it.” To that day, Kaya felt a strong surge of rage whenever she ran across a throwback picture or read an article referring to that game. It was a trigger.
“My parents promised that I could go when they returned, but I just couldn’t wait.” Her nose turned up with disgust, disgust directed 100% inward. “I just had to go play that stupid fucking game.”
“Denes loved birds. They were one of his fixations. They think—they think he saw one outside our living room window or something and walked outside to see if he could catch it because, of course, I forgot to lock the front door.” She stared off into space before closing her eyes. “I had just walked into my friend’s house when I heard someone scream like I’ve never heard a scream before.” Kaya tugged the pillow closer to her chest and lowered her head. “I ran back so fast because I thought—I thought I could help him. I thought I could save him.” Her voice cracked. “—But there was so much blood, and he was so hurt—he died in the middle of the street, bleeding, terrified, and it was all my fault.”
Chris closed his eyes and shook his head. “Kaya—”
“They never found the driver,” she added quietly, chewing on the inside of her cheek. “The shock of it all……it was too much for my mom, and she miscarried.” Kaya laughed, but there wasn’t a trace of humor. “I spiraled after Denes passed. Everything bad and terrible I could get myself into, I did. I—I skipped class, I partied, I drank, I tried drugs.” She scoffed. “I lost my virginity when I was thirteen to some guy whose name I still don’t know because I was so drunk.” She leaned back into the sofa, staring at the intricate pattern of the rug. “I just—at the time, I thought if I did enough, I could make my parents hate me, because it’s what I deserved. But for everything I tried, they kept giving me chance after chance.”
“So, then I attempted suicide, twice, and I couldn’t even do that right.” She groaned and wiped at her eyes again. The cuffs of the shirt were nearly soaked. “I realized that God or the universe or whomever clearly wanted me to suffer and to live with my guilt, but in the midst of trying to punish myself, I failed to realize that all I’d done was cause my parents more pain.”
“Day of my high school graduation, I woke up at the crack of dawn to pack up my bags, told my parents that I was going out with some friends, but I’d be home by 7—and I haven’t seen or spoken with them since.”
She clapped and lifted her hands. “And there you have it. You’ve now seen me naked; you’ve seen me cry, and now you know that I’m a murderer—”
“You’re not a murderer, Kaya,” he was finally able to complete his sentence, still very much in shock over what she’d disclosed. “And what happened to your brother wasn’t your fault.”
Chris watched her demeanor soften, shifting from her previous facetious tone to a more somber tone. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“I’m saying it because it’s the truth. You were a child.”
She shrugged sadly. “So was he.”
“That still doesn’t make it your fault.”
She turned away from where he sat across from her. She hadn’t even realized he’d moved from his initial position by the window. Untangling her legs, she moved the pillow to the side and stood in front of him. “Why are you so nice to me? You should be running for the hills.”
Chris brought his hands to her waist and pulled her in between his spread legs. “Why do you keep asking questions you already know the answers to?”
“Even after everything I’ve done?” She whispered, emotion betraying her for the umpteenth time that day. “You—you still—you still feel….like that about me?”
“You’re stubborn, impulsive, argumentative, flippant, and undoubtedly one of the most complicated women I’ve ever met.” He slowly stood up, never once breaking eye contact as he cupped her face, fingers brushing away the dampness of her flushed cheeks. “And yet, seeing you smile is the highlight of my day.”
She chuckled and nervously cleared her throat. “So, was today subpar? Like, medium light? Half-light? It all went downhill after 12pm.”
He shook his head and kissed her forehead. “You are, in fact, a hot mess.”
Her fingers grasped at his sleeves. “I really am sorry about ruining your evening.”
“You didn’t ruin my evening, Kaya.” He brought his hand to her hair, pushing back the tendrils that had fallen from her updo. “Thank you for opening to me. I know that wasn’t easy.”
“It’s a lot easier opening up my legs,” she muttered, watching as he closed his eyes. “I’m sorry—you’re right. It’s—it’s not easy, and I don’t like talking about….feelings.” Her eyes lifted as she chewed on her bottom lip. “But, I do have feelings for you.” She shut her eyes and licked her top lip. “And there’s something else I need to tell you.”
His gaze softened. “Anything.”
It was so simple, the opportunity was available, the setting was perfect. She’d already told him the hardest part, now all she had to do was tell him the rest. The problem though, was that what she’d shared hadn’t changed much. It only helped him to understand her better. It would potentially improve their relationship.
This would destroy it.
She cleared her throat again. “If you tell anyone I’m capable of crying, I will smother you in your sleep.”
He chuckled and kissed her temple. “It’s late. I’m going to shower.” He studied her. “Try not to get into any more trouble, yeah?”
She smiled softly. “I make no promises.”
He gave her side a gentle squeeze before yawning as he walked back into the bedroom. Finally alone, she fell back onto the sofa and hugged the pillow against her body. Kaya felt both disgust and frustration. If there was a perfect moment to tell him, that was it, and now it was gone.
She was running out of time
-------
TAGS: @islandvamp @toni9 @destinyg237 @tashawar @valkryienymph @letsshamelessqueen-m @missyperle @kpizzletrash @brittyevans @mani-lifes @amorestevens @periodtcevans @hello-therree @shegoesbyarose @lettytheletdown @yanniebunnie @iwrite4poc @nycoledon @fangurlingismyforte @babe-im-bi @amirra88 @cocoamoonmalfoy @goldenrosexx @liquorlaughslove @ljstraightnochaser @jurneesjourney @bestyums-ever84 @notacamelthatsmywife @champagnesugamama @cest-la69vie @yanniebunny5151 @goldenrosexx​
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fangurlingismyforte · 4 days ago
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Reblog if you're not homophobic
Every url that reblog’s will be written in a book and shown to my homophobic dad. 
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fangurlingismyforte · 4 days ago
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Reblog to make a white gay big mad
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fangurlingismyforte · 5 days ago
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A request to you
Hey guys, recently I've been receiving some messages from underage anons saying they read my +18 stories.
First of all I want to say that this is a very uncomfortable and also a very problematic situation.
The +18 warning is there for a reason. I know I can't forbid anyone from doing anything, but I ask you not to interact with these stories.
By interacting with 18+ content you end up interacting with older people, which for various reasons can get you into trouble. Also, by interacting with 18+ stories, you can get the authors in trouble as well.
So please, if you're underage and cherish the authors you like, don't interact with their 18+ stories!
I won't answer any of the asks people sent me about this, so as not to incite other people to do the same and also because I feel uncomfortable answering them. But let this post be my response to them.
Sorry if I made anyone uncomfortable with this subject, but considering what has been happening, I thought it was better to talk about it.
Stay safe, you guys
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fangurlingismyforte · 5 days ago
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I simultaneously hate and love your teasing idk how much more of it I can take before I explode🤧🤧
𝙎𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝗈𝖿 𝗟𝗼𝘃𝗲 | seven
Parings: CEO!Chris Hemsworth x Stripper!OC // Words: 7.8K // Type: Series // Taglist: Yes/No (Inbox me to be tagged or removed) Warnings: Sexual harassment, racial themes, discussions pertaining to child death, miscarriage, alcohol/drug use, and suicide attempts. Angst.
A/N: I'm so sorry for the inexcusable delay in updates. This chapter is hella long and perhaps should have been split into two, but I promised ya'll some answers in the last chapter, so here they are!
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“What is that haircut?”
“Why are you zooming in?”
Kaya said nothing, continuing to pinch her fingers to gain a closer look, her smile widening by the second. “Holy shit, you weren’t kidding. “
Chris rolled his eyes. “All children go through phases.”
“This is beyond a phase, my friend. Don’t even get me started on the outfit.” As she erupted in yet another fit of giggles, he took advantage of the opportunity to snatch the iPad away from her.
“Go to sleep.”
Quieting herself down, she wiped at her eyes. “No. Come on. I’m enjoying this, and like you said, you were a dumb kid. How were you supposed to know these photos would haunt you till’ the end of time?”
“Only if they get out.”
“Don’t tempt me with a good time, sir.”
Chris closed the app and looked over at her. “What about you?”
Kaya’s brow lifted. “What about me?”
“What about your phases?”
She snorted. “Absolutely not.” He continued to stare her down, prompting her to cave, a surprising move even for her. Kaya’s tenacity was typically much stronger than that. “Fine.”
She grabbed her phone and unlocked it, opening Google Photos and scrolling mindlessly. She knew that any horrifically embarrassing snapshots would be from as far back as her library went. The older the photo, the higher the likelihood she would regret ever caving.
It took roughly two minutes for her to locate a set, her eyes shutting and a small moan leaving her partially closed mouth.
He smirked. “Found it?”
“Shut up.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
“You’re going to make me regret this, aren’t you?”
“Without a doubt.”
She couldn’t help it. She laughed. “At least you’re honest.” Blowing out a breath, she issued a formal forewarning. “In my defense, I was young and dumb.”
“How is that diff—fine, I will reserve my judgment.”
“Liar.” When he said nothing else, she took another deep breath and gradually pulled her phone away from her breast, twisting her wrist so that he could see the screen. “I give you, thebaddestputa69.”
She watched the corner of his lips lift upward as he fought off a smile in favor of a smirk. “Hotmail or aol?” Her surprise at his knowledge of the fallen email servers must have shown because he commented, “I’m old, not ancient.”
She matched his smirk and leaned over to whisper. “Hotmail. Definitely hotmail.”
“AIM username?”
“Come on, the same as my email. I wasn’t creative enough to have multiple aliases.”
He chuckled, grabbing her phone to examine the photo. “I certainly do not miss the peace sign era.”
“I’m pretty sure I used that same pose in all of my photos back then.”
He gestured to the plastered graphic that read ‘jealousy is a disease, get well soon’. “With the same masterful level of editing, I’m sure.”
“But of course, blingee and picnik were a staple.”
A comfortable silence befell them as he returned her phone, and she quickly swiped up to close the app. Kaya was grateful that he didn’t swipe right or left, something she was expecting him to do, if she was being completely honest with herself.
Kaya yawned and naturally laid her head on his shoulder as she reached over to grab the book she was reading when they somehow got on the topic of rebellious and wild phases of days of past.
“Are we th—”
“Finish that sentence, and I will personally throw you out of this damn plane myself.”
Kaya looked over at him, eyebrows furrowed, and mouth pronounced. “It’s a legitimate question.”
“No, it was a legitimate question. However, it stopped being one when you asked me the fifth time.”
“I’m just trying to keep the conversation going. Damn.”
“No, you’re just trying to pester me.”
“Look, it’s obvious you don’t want to hear me talk anymore, so I’m just going to shut my mouth for the remainder of the flight.” He snorted. “What?”
“We both know that’s not possible.” He finally broke his gaze from his phone as he looked over with that knowing smirk that she despised. “You always have to have the last word.”
“That is not true.”
“Kaya, you’re like a child.”
“Keep it up, and you’ll be the one who’s personally tossed from this jet.”
“See what I mean.”
Groaning, she threw her hands up and shook the book in her right hand. “This is the second book in this series.”
“And?”
“And I started the series when we were still on the taxi.”
He shrugged. “Read slower.”
“Chris!”
He laughed, reaching to place his hand on her thigh as she sighed while banging her head back against the headrest. “Relax.”
“Don’t you think if I could, I would?”
“You were doing great five minutes ago.”
“That was in the past.”
“Next time, we’re taking separate jets.”
She didn’t know why but hearing him refer to future happenings both excited and saddened her, for more reasons than one. She cleared her throat. “This is a work trip, right?” He looked down at her as she placed the book down on the ground and held onto his bicep. “You know, something for your company.”
He studied her for a moment and looked up, closing his eyes as he laid his head back against the headrest. “I have the cover of this month’s GQ Italia.”
“Fancy,” she remarked, still unsatisfied with his answer-non answer. “So, I was right. This is a work thing.”
Chris thought about what she said, what she asked, as well as his response before he replied. “They offered to contract a photographer in LA.”
Brows scrunched, she had to ask, now more confused than she was just a few minutes ago. “So why go to them?”
His silence only irked her, the seconds dragging into minutes, which felt like hours. Frustrated and impatient, she called his name again. “Chris-”
“Jesus,” was all she heard before his lips were on hers, palm of his hand pressed against her cheek. Everything else after that was a sensual blur. His other hand moved to her hip, pulling her onto his lap, never once breaking their kiss. She placed her hands on his shoulders, giving a light squeeze, inching her body closer to his, close enough to feel the heat that always emanated over him.
And then, it was over.
Eyes fluttering and breath staggering, she nearly whined when he ran his thumb over her swollen bottom lip.
“This isn’t work for me.”
----
“This is our room?”
Chris looked up and chuckled, watching Kaya spin around the middle, eyes soaking in their suite. He placed her bag near the closet while crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.
“It is.”
Kaya nodded and grabbed the bottom of her sweatshirt, tugging it over her head. She extended her arm out and turned around, lifting a brow. “And we have maid service, correct?”
He eyed her. “Of course.”
Kaya smirked and let the garment fall to the floor.
Chris chuckled. “You wanna explain that?”
“What?” She played innocent, fingers toying with the waistband of her joggers as she began to shimmy out of them. “Staying in a fancy hotel where I don’t have t0 clean up after myself?” She walked toward him, moving to grab her suitcase so that she could find her next outfit. “Granted, we have the maid service at home, but—” Both Christopher and Kaya paused at her statement, equally surprised by how easily it flowed, but more so with the statement itself.
Defense immediately kicked in and Kaya cleared her throat. “I mean, ya know, your place.” She refused to make eye contact that exceeded ten seconds, grabbing the handle of her suitcase and dragging it in the direction of what looked like the bathroom.
“Dibs.”
Her feet weren’t moving fast enough for her liking. In fact, they were slow enough that Chris was somehow able to cross the room and grab her by her arm. She looked up, managing to remain calm while inwardly panicking.
God, please don’t let him ask anything.
“Don’t take too long.”
She swallowed. “Why?”
Her grip on the handle tightened when he moved his hand to her face, the back of it brushing against her cheek. Had he been paying close enough attention, he would have noticed the way she shivered at his touch.
“You want dinner, don’t you?”
-----
“This isn’t exactly what I meant.”
Kaya looked up from her pizza, pausing mid chew. “What? Pizza in Italy? This is goals.”
He intended to take her to a fine restaurant, one where only the elite could afford to dine. Instead, she requested pizza delivered to their room. Kaya never ceased to surprise him. “And why are you eating pizza with a fork?”
She shrugged, adjusting the thin strap of her shirt. “Because pizza is messy, and my life's already messy enough. I avoid when I can.”
Chris didn’t say anything, simply watching her eat. She caught his gaze and looked away. If she could, she’d go back in time and stop herself from ever saying what she did. It’d ruined everything. He’d been acting different around her since, and she hated that. She also hated that she hated it.
Since when did she give a flying fuck about what people thought of her? Let alone him.
It was out of character for her, and she didn’t like it.
She didn’t like it at all.
Similarly, Chris also found it difficult to focus on anything other than the encounter from earlier, but not for the reasons Kaya thought.
Not even close.
“So, what’s the agenda for this trip?”
He chuckled and brought the champagne to his lips. “And ruin the surprise?”
Her eyes narrowed as she replaced the fork with her fingers so that she could eat the crust piece by piece. “What surprise?”
“What kind of question is that? Who gives away a surprise?”
“Are you capable of ever just answering my questions with a straight answer?”
He pretended to think. “I could.”
“But?”
“Where’s the fun in that?”
“You and fun? Never realized they were synonymous.”
“I’d like to think we have fun.”
“We have sex. Really, really, great sex.”
“You don’t consider that fun?”
“Fun isn’t a strong enough word to describe it.” He lifted a brow, and she scoffed, tossing a red pepper packet in his direction. “Stop it. I am trying to have a mature conversation here.”
“Not quite sure how possible that is when both parties are inebriated.”
“Bullshit. You know damn well neither one of us is drunk. You haven’t seen me drunk. Hell, I haven’t seen me drunk in a while.”
The way her tone changed toward the end of her sentence garnered his interest. “Why not?”
She looked at him, her smile faltering as she nervously cleared her throat. “I—uh—I get really bad migraines, and Excedrin is the only thing that works for me.” Telling him the truth, well, a fraction of the truth, felt strange yet relieving, probably because she’d spent so much of her life hiding and lying that the truth was unfamiliar territory. “Needless to say, meds and alcohol? Never really a good combo.”
“You’re drinking now.”
“I haven’t taken any medicine yet.”
“Maybe you won’t have to.”
She smiled sadly. “I will.” A beat. “It’s all I have.” Kaya snatched another piece of her crust and swallowed fully before explaining. “That’s why my sleep schedule, if you can even call it that, is so fucked up.”
He thought about it. “Excedrin has caffeine.”
“An insane amount.”
“It helps your migraines—”
“And keeps me up in return.” When he grew quiet, she offered. “Trust me. The insomnia is much better than the pain.”
“I’m sorry.”
She grimaced, eyes darting in either direction. “Why?”
He sighed and ran his hands all over his face. “That’s why you get so upset when I wake you up.”
“I wouldn’t say upset.”
“You threatened to slit my throat in my sleep.”
“Okay, maybe I was a little upset,” she confessed, and they shared a laugh before his tone grew serious again.
“I’ll be mindful of that.” Head tilted to the side, a sign she was still confused, he continued. “So that you can sleep.”
She smiled teasingly, abandoning the last bit of her food, and pushing her plate to the side. “Is that consideration I hear?”
“It is.”
The way he was looking at her, the lack of typical sarcasm in his tone, it was both welcoming and conflicting. Crawling across the floor, she moved his plate to the side and climbed into his lap.
Hands on his shoulders, she lowered her voice and whispered into his ear. “Well, I’m up right now.”
He made a sound and brought his hands to her hips. “You are.” Her eyes shut when his lips moved to her shoulder. “You should get some sleep.”
Immediately, she coiled back and glared. “Are you serious right now?” He laughed, which only upset her further as he stood up, her legs locking around his waist. “It’s been at least 8 hours.”
“You keeping a timer or something?”
“Look.” She waited for him to place her on the bed before she grabbed the bottom of his shirt and tugging so that he laid back on the mattress. She quickly climbed on top of him. “If there’s one thing I know about us, we are ideal intimate partners. Our sexual chemistry is astronomical.”
His eyes drank her in. “Is that it?”
“Is what it?”
His voice lowered. “Is that all you think we have?”
At that moment, Kaya realized a couple of things. This was wrong. She was suddenly very much uncomfortable. And this was a mistake. This was why she didn’t tell the truth. It meant putting yourself at risk for being vulnerable.
She was never good with that.
Clearing her throat, she climbed off him and flashed a crafty smile. “I’m gonna go shower.” She couldn’t handle seeing his face, so she turned around, purposely pretending she had to look around the room to search for her luggage.
“You should know I hate sleeping with blankets.” Kaya needed to redirect the conversation to another topic. This was becoming all too much for her.
He sat up and rolled his shoulders. “So, strip the bed? Got it.”
“Absolutely not. I could freeze.”
“You just said—”
Kaya stood by the door that led to the living room area and smiled sadly. “I’m a hot ass mess, Chris.” A beat. “The sooner you accept that, the better.”
-------
We need to talk when you get a chance. Please?
No matter how many times she looked at the phone, a new incoming gray message never appeared. She waited and waited, even scrolling up only for it to bounce back with no change.
She missed Nia. She missed their banter. She missed making tik toks with her. And she especially missed the advice giving, of which she could desperately use right about now.
Something was happening between them. With her and Chris. Of which she didn’t know, nor did she understand. It drove her mad because it was a new experience, one where she didn’t feel as though she always had to walk on eggshells.
Being with Chris….
“God.” She ran her hand over her face. What the hell was she doing? She wasn’t with Chris. Not like that, anyway. This was a business transaction. They were both using each other for selfish purposes.
Maybe it was the sex. Nia always warned her that behind every sexual encounter, there was at least some trace of feelings.
Kaya always thought that was bullshit.
Now….now she wasn’t so sure.
“You alright?”
She looked up from her chair and saw Chris walk in. She chewed the inside of her cheek as he sat down in the chair opposite of her. Kaya took in his wardrobe, so casual and laid back. She’d never seen him in denim before, but he looked good.
She didn’t even know the photographer, but she was a fan. A billionaire in Levi’s? Iconic.
“How does it feel to dress like us common folk?”
“Poor.” He winked as she glared. “We should be done soon.”
“Don’t rush on my part. The snacks here are delicious, and who knows, I could play dress up.” She wiggled her brows and straightened when there was a knock on the door.
“Sorry to interrupt,” the photographer spoke up and offered Kaya a friendly smile. “You’re Kaya, yes? I’m Elena.”
Kaya was surprised by the fact that this woman was both speaking to her and actually knew who she was, so her response was delayed. “Yes. It’s nice to meet you.” She offered her hand and noticed the woman was staring at her. Welp. It was nice while it lasted. “Is there something I can help you with?”
“I’m sorry,” she apologized but continued to stare. “It’s just...has anyone ever told you that you have amazing bone structure?”
Kaya sputtered. “Not unless they wanted something from me.”
Elena smiled. “Well, I suppose this is no different.”
“I don’t understand,” Kaya asked, looking over at Chris. He was surprisingly quiet.
“How about we get some shots of the both of you?”
She immediately protested. “Oh no. I—I’m just here for moral support.”
“You did say you wanted to play dress up,” he reminded. She glared. Of course he would choose to speak up now.
She turned her narrowed eyes on him and harshly whispered. “Not while being photographed.”
He placed his hand over hers. “Relax.”
Kaya remembered that they weren’t alone and therefore, had to keep up the act. Even if it was starting to feel less and less like acting.
“I’m used to people watching, not photographing.” He lifted a brow. Laughing, she slapped his chest and took a deep breath. She looked over at Elena. “Will I at least get to see them before you pick which ones to use? If any.”
“Of course.”
Kaya caved. “Fine.” He kissed the top of her head and mouthed a thank you. “You owe me.”
“Sure, I do,” he dismissed, slapping her on her ass as Elena grabbed her to drag her away.
“Time to make magic.”
-----
It was a bad idea, one of many that had occurred, Kaya realized.
When she joked about wanting to play dress—up, she didn’t think that it would actually happen. She didn’t think that she’d become involved in his shoot. Kaya especially didn’t expect to have as much….fun as she did.
And she hated that, too. The fact that she managed to smile and laugh more in one setting than she had in, hell, longer than she could remember. She didn’t like it. She didn’t like it at all.
She really, really didn’t like the way Chris looked at her every time she walked onto set in a new look, and there were a couple of them. The way he focused on her, eyes taking in every bit of her form, all the way down from her shoes up to her hair. Like he didn’t want to look away. Like he couldn’t look away. She despised the way he held her when they were photographed together, often being the reason for her smile or laughter with his comments that he whispered into her ear, sneaking in a kiss against her temple or holding her against him.
It was all so domestic and sweet, and it made no sense.
He was starting to make no sense.
And she especially didn’t understand why she was putting off leaving the bathroom, having sat on the toilet for at least 15 minutes.
As if on cue, two loud knocks on the door pulled her from her thoughts.
“I’m coming, damnit.”
“That’s what you said last time. Come on, Kaya.” She was both surprised and annoyed that it was Chris. She expected it to be members of the glam team that he’d hired to help her prepare for the GQ function he was invited to, and of course, she was forced to accompany him. Turns out he wasn’t just chosen for the cover. He was man of the year. “We’re going to be late.”
“Maybe you should just leave me behind,” she muttered.
“Maybe I can just kick this damn door down,” he countered.
“Then you’ll have to pay for the damages.”
“Then I’ll buy the damn hotel,” he shot back testily. “I’m not going to ask you again, Kaya.”
She scowled and rolled her neck. Kaya knew he was being serious. The bastard could buy his way out of anything.
If only….
Blowing out a deep breath, she swallowed and stood, holding up her dress. It was undoubtedly beautiful, gold, a slit in the middle of her chest and on her left leg exposing more skin than she would have thought appropriate. Her curls were styled in a fancy updo, and her makeup was equally as bold as her dress, finalized with a red lip. She knew that she looked good, and that’s what scared her.
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Chris had been looking at her like that all day, and she couldn’t keep handling it.
If she could even consider it handling. Managing was perhaps a better term. Poorly managing was the perfect term.
Kaya ripped open the door and plastered on a fake smile. “Happy?”
And there it was, his eyes widened and softened as he gave her a onceover. “And don’t tell me I look beautiful, cause’ I already know it.”
Kaya figured if she said it for him, she wouldn’t have to deal with the weird and uncomfortable knotting in her stomach that she experienced every time he complimented her.
And it worked, he said nothing, only helping to hold up her dress as they walked to the SUV that would escort them. In the car, she was also pleasantly surprised that he didn’t attempt to make small talk with her during the drive. She was certain, however, that it was because he took at least three different work calls during that time.
She made drafted Tik Toks in the meantime.
When they finally arrived, Kaya nearly ran out of the car right then and there.
“Is that a red carpet?” Her mouth dropped. “What the hell? You said nothing about having to walk a damn carpet that is red.”
He chuckled. Kaya realized his hand was on the exposed portion of her thigh. “Stay close to me, and I’ll take care of you. You’ll be fine.”
Kaya was used to having eyes on her, but that didn’t mean she liked it, especially when it didn’t involve money being thrown her way. “I don’t have to say anything, do I?”
He squeezed her thigh. “You’ll most likely receive compliments.”
“I can handle that,” she spoke more to herself than him. “Just long as no one asks if I prefer cats over dogs or whatever shit they ask.”
He laughed quietly and looked at her. “You ready?”
No. “Yes.”
Chris climbed out the car first so that he could help her out of the vehicle, and as soon as she stepped out, she cursed to herself. There were so many damn people. People taking photographs. People being photographed. People helping both the people the photographed and the photographers. And then there was her. She felt so out of place.
If he wasn’t already holding her hand, she would have grabbed for his.
Kaya used her left hand to hold up her dress, while making sure that she stayed close to Chris who led the way, smiling for the camera while sparing her glances every so often to assess her level of comfort.
Kaya played along, evoking a smile as she posed with him for a few photos. That’s when it started again. Like the photoshoot from a few hours ago, she found herself feeling less forced and more comfortable. Like, it was natural.
Like it was real.
Kaya was eventually allowed to stand to the side as he gave a few interviews, some in English, most in Italian. She’d meant to ask him earlier when the hell he learned to speak so many languages. This was the third she’d learned of. She had a feeling at least one or two journalists asked about her, because he would look in her direction and shoot a wink or something of the sort.
Her smile was a natural reaction.
The process was less daunting than she anticipated, not that she’d ever admit that to him. It was once they moved inside that Kaya realized they’d yet to reach the hard part. That hardest part was “socializing” with the guests, many of which were white, spicy white at best. She spotted some minorities but found that they were just as distant as the rest.
The vim of the event was welcoming, however, which confused Kaya to some extent. She simplified it down to the event was nice, the people were trash, and Chris was both an ass and a gentleman for forcing her to come.
He’d introduced her to a few people, most of which spoke poor English. That, she could acknowledge, was nice. Not the strained English, but his obvious concern for her wellbeing. He was going out of his way to make her feel as comfortable as he could.
It was also irritating because it resurfaced those damn knots.
They were seated at a table, and he was texting someone when she leaned over and tugged on his sleeve. Kaya also took a moment to appreciate how nice he looked. The man was something sinful in a suit. “I think I know him.”
He looked up, immediately locking his phone. “Who?”
She gestured with her chin. “The guy over there talking to the girl with the green dress. But don’t look at them.”
His eyes lifted to the ceiling. Right before he proceeded to look right in that direction.
She laughed despite her irritation. “What did I literally just fucking say?”
“I’ll never understand why people want to do something without actually doing it. I don’t have the time.” She shook her head. He was so impatient. “And how do you know him?”
She lifted a brow. He asked with a newfound sense of urgency. If she didn’t know any better, she would have guessed it came from a place of jealousy.
Kaya studied the stranger across the room again when her eyes widened. “I know. He’s that actor from that porn movie we watched.”
“We don’t watch porn, Kaya. We make it.”
“Stop it.” She leaned closer, hating that her smile contrasted the frustration she felt with how vulgar he was speaking in such a public setting. “And you know the movie where they…..ya know, basically the whole time, and he kept asking in that godawful delivery, are you lost, baby girl?”
Her equally terrible impression caused him to laugh quietly. “I think that is him.”
“I told you.” She spoke a little louder than she would have liked due to her excitement at being correct. “He looks better on screen.”
Chris glanced over at him once more and scoffed. “He’s scrawny.”
“Sir, not everyone is like you and built like a fucking tanker.”
“Not my problem.”
Kaya rolled her eyes and gathered her dress. “I’ll be back. I have to use the restroom.” She stood and leaned over, arms around him from behind as she whispered. “Try not to be too much of a dick while I’m gone, okay?”
He turned to look at her. “And where’s the fun in that?”
Turns out finding the bathroom was a harder task than she’d anticipated. She’d asked one of the servers while maneuvering through the crowd, but it also turned out that Kaya wasn’t the best with directions. She did find it, though.
Eventually.
Kaya was navigating her way back to Chris when she was stopped by a man in a suit along the way.
He was of average height, average build, and average attraction. She was immediately annoyed.
“Hi,” Kaya greeted with a tight smile.
“Hello,” he smiled. Add in average dental health. “You are very beautiful.”
Kaya realized he didn’t have an accent, either. American, most likely. “Uhh, thank you.” When she moved to walk past him, he blocked her. “Sir, I really should—”
“How much?”
Her eyes darted to either side. “I’m sorry?”
“Money is no issue, as I’m sure you can see, and I’d like you for a week.” He stepped closer, bringing his hand to trail it down her arm. “Longer even, perhaps.”
“Sir, I have no idea what you are talking about, and please do not touch me.” It wasn’t so much of a request as much as it was a demand. “Now, I really should—”
“You’re not American.” Kaya continued to be confused as hell when his eyes lit up with excitement. “That explains why you look so exotic.” Confusion easily morphed into rage as she finally caught on to what he was referring to. “I bet you feel di—”
“You’re disgusting,” she hissed, pulling away from him. “I am not a fucking prostitute—”
“Call it what you want, girl,” he dismissed. “I don’t judge. I can pay you well.”
“Go fuck yourself, you sick son of a bitch,” she cursed, turning away when he grabbed her arm. “Let me go.”
“You think that you’re special?” He’d taken on another tone, one that conveyed his anger at being rejected. “The fuckin’ stall I just pissed in is worth more than you, bitch.”
Kaya refused to allow him to see her cry, but she’d be lying if she tried to say that his words didn’t sting, especially his next verbal attack.
“You can slap on that expensive dress and let Hemsworth make you feel special, but I know, you know, and everyone else in this fucking place knows that you’re nothing but a cheap, illegal whore—” Panic arose when he moved his hand to the exposed skin of her thigh, squeezing tightly. His hand started to inch upward when Kaya acted on instinct. He cursed aloud while Kaya gasped as she realized that she’d silenced him with her fist dead square in the middle of his face. “You fucking bitch!”
Shock and fear took over as Kaya gathered the bottom of her dress and ran, as much as the gown and her heels would allow, that is. Certain he was going to chase her for retribution, she consistently looked back, unaware that she needed to be just as aware of what was in front as what was behind.
She shrieked and immediately went to pull herself away from the strong body she’d collided with.
“Kaya.” Refocusing her attention, she looked up and realized it was Chris. “Where the hell—” He stopped amid his statement when he took in her appearance and realized that she was crying. “What happened?”
“Nothing.” Kaya looked down, speaking more to herself than him. Not that it mattered. He was judging based on what he saw instead of what she said. He’d learned by now that her words rarely matched the truth. “Let’s just go—”
“Kaya,” he repeated, softer. Chris brought his hands to her face, forcing her to meet his gaze as he asked again, slowly. “What happened?” A strike of anger flashed in his blue eyes. “Did someone touch you?”
“No,” she answered, quickly. Too quickly.
The anger escalated exponentially. “Who? Tell me.”
Kaya could have slapped herself. She wasn’t helping the situation. She was making it worse. “It doesn’t matter, I hit him, and now he’s probably going to sue you—”
“Where is he?” Chris was looking behind her, eyes flaming. He was livid. “Show me. Now.”
“No.” Speaking was becoming an increasing challenge, especially against the backdrop of overwhelming emotions. Everything she’d been feeling, preventing herself from feeling, and afraid to acknowledge was gradually bubbling to the surface. “Just—just let me go back to the hotel. I’m messing everything up for you.”
He calmed for a second, realizing what was happening. Chris was unfamiliar with this side of her. Unfamiliar with seeing her so vulnerable. “What?”
Kaya suddenly realized that her eyes were burning again. She was fighting back tears. “I’ll give you back the money for the day, it’s—it’s fine, you’re better off without me here—”
Her offer to pay him incensed Chris. This wasn’t about the money. It stopped being about the money a long time ago, even if he hadn’t realized that until today. “I don’t want the fucking money, Kaya.”
She shook her head and closed her eyes. “Don’t—don’t say that.”
“Why? It’s the truth.”
“Please,” she plead. Control over her emotions was a battle she’d all but lost at that point. Her words, she was certain, would be next.
He raised his voice. Chris sensed, saw that she was uncomfortable, but he also realized that this was what she needed. A push. “Why?”
“Because this all about the fucking money, okay?” She matched his volume, accepting that her tears were going to fall no matter how much she willed them not to. She’d lost the war. “It has to be about the money, because if it isn’t then that means you care, and—you can’t, alright?”
He studied her, wondering if she realized this conversation was difficult for him too. He brought his hand to the side of her face. “Why is it so impossible for you to accept that I fucking care about you?”
She looked up, glistening eyes and wavering voice. “Because then I have to admit that I care about you too, and I can’t do that.” She spoke to herself, as if vocalizing it would cement a decision that was already out of her hands. “I won’t do it.”
“Why?” He pressed. Chris brought his other hand to the other side of her face, cupping it and moving closer. He gave zero fucks about where they were and who could have possibly overheard. “Why are you fighting this so hard?”
She pulled herself away from him, back colliding against the wall as she blurted, “because all I do is hurt the people I care about alright?” In that moment, Kaya realized she was so far gone that the point of return was no longer an option. Her mouth trembled as she struggled to form her next sentence, listing off names with her fingers as props. “Mami, Papi, Nia. Hell, my own brother is dead because of me.” A beat. “I’ll only hurt you, and I care about you too much to do that.”
“Kaya—"
A newfound heaviness started to weigh upon her chest, another blockade to her speech. “I’m standing here in a dress I can’t afford, a building I can’t even fucking pronounce, and with a man I don’t deserve.”
His voice lowered. “Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, I don’t deserve you?” Kaya looked at him, her eyes softening before she squinted, her face scrunching up in obvious pain.
He took note of this. As invested as Chris was in finally getting Kaya to open up about how she really felt, her wellbeing would always be his primary concern.
“Kaya.” He placed his hands on her waist, steadying her. “What’s wrong?”
“I—” She blinked several times, blinding lights obscuring her vision. “I—can’t—" Kaya felt the firmness of his chest, inhaled the scent of his cologne, and heard her name on his lips before everything faded to black.
-----
She awoke on her side, body clutched against a pillow, and a thin sheet covering half her body. Never one to take her time returning to her senses, she forced herself to sit up, eyes still scrunched from the sleep.
Looking down she realized she was dressed in only one of Chris’s dress shirts, her dress discarded.
Memory returned as Kaya replayed the events that transpired prior to her slumber. The photoshoot. The party. The asshole.
Chris.
“I don’t care. Tell them to send it in the mail or something.”
She recognized his voice traveling from the living room area, prompting her to swing her legs over the bed, her toes submerging into the soft carpet. She’d never been in such a fine hotel where the carpeting probably cost more than six months’ worth of rent on her one-bedroom apartment.
“Evans, I don’t give a flying fuck about any of that right now. You can handle it. I don’t care.”
Kaya contemplated remaining where she was, eavesdropping without being detected. She quickly decided against it. She’d done enough.
Her feet carried her out of the room, and she stood in the doorway where she saw he was standing against the massive window that provided a breathtaking overview of the city.
Again, she considered leaving him be, but he either had exceptional peripheral vision or caught her reflection in the window because he spun around. Kaya’s eyebrows furrowed when she realized he was still dressed in his suit, with the expectation of the jacket and dress shirt which were both discarded, leaving the white undershirt.
Uncomfortable with the way he was looking at her, more concern than that, she settled onto the sofa, pulling a decorative pillow to her chest as she crossed her legs.
“I have to go,” he spoke briefly before pulling the phone from his ear and hanging up.
Kaya swallowed. He’d yet to speak, so she took the opportunity to do so. “Still don’t believe me when I said I’m a hot mess?”
“What happened tonight, Kaya?”
“Which part?” She knew that playing coy wasn’t the best route, but she was forever stubborn and would fight until she had nothing left. “Where I ruined your evening, assaulted a millionaire, told you one of my deepest secrets, or fainted in your arms? There’s a lot.”
“All of it.”
She looked away and licked her lips. Kaya felt cornered, absolutely trapped. Emotionally. She’d always assumed being physically stuck would feel far more suffocating and frightening. She was wrong.
Kaya considered her options, though far and few in between. She could deflect. She was a master at that. She could redirect blame onto him. Call him out on even making her go on the trip, for not telling her ahead of time what to expect, maybe throw in a few insults. And lastly, the most frightening of them all, she could be honest.
That was the scariest of them all.
“I lied to you.” The words spilled out before she realized it, but Kaya accepted the fact that she was tired. There was only so much she could carry, and she’d reached her limits. “My—my parents aren’t dead. They still live in the same house in Parlier that I grew up in with Denes. He’s—he was my brother.” It felt strange talking about, verbalizing what she’d quietly struggled with for so many years. And yet, there was a peace that accompanied the release. “He was such a beautiful little boy, but….different. He didn’t talk much, life skills were….hard for him, and he had these fixations on certain things. He didn’t like change.”
“Kaya, you don’t—”
“When I was eleven, and he was eight, my parents found out they were pregnant. They’d been trying for so long….they were so happy.” She roughly wiped at her face to do away with the silent tears that fell. The crying, however, was inevitable. “One day, they had a checkup appointment, and the babysitter fell through, so they asked me to watch Denes.” She nodded slowly, reverting to the same rush of emotions she felt that day. “I was so….mad, because my friend had just gotten Guitar Hero, and I was supposed to walk down to her house so we could play it.” To that day, Kaya felt a strong surge of rage whenever she ran across a throwback picture or read an article referring to that game. It was a trigger.
“My parents promised that I could go when they returned, but I just couldn’t wait.” Her nose turned up with disgust, disgust directed 100% inward. “I just had to go play that stupid fucking game.”
“Denes loved birds. They were one of his fixations. They think—they think he saw one outside our living room window or something and walked outside to see if he could catch it because, of course, I forgot to lock the front door.” She stared off into space before closing her eyes. “I had just walked into my friend’s house when I heard someone scream like I’ve never heard a scream before.” Kaya tugged the pillow closer to her chest and lowered her head. “I ran back so fast because I thought—I thought I could help him. I thought I could save him.” Her voice cracked. “—But there was so much blood, and he was so hurt—he died in the middle of the street, bleeding, terrified, and it was all my fault.”
Chris closed his eyes and shook his head. “Kaya—”
“They never found the driver,” she added quietly, chewing on the inside of her cheek. “The shock of it all……it was too much for my mom, and she miscarried.” Kaya laughed, but there wasn’t a trace of humor. “I spiraled after Denes passed. Everything bad and terrible I could get myself into, I did. I—I skipped class, I partied, I drank, I tried drugs.” She scoffed. “I lost my virginity when I was thirteen to some guy whose name I still don’t know because I was so drunk.” She leaned back into the sofa, staring at the intricate pattern of the rug. “I just—at the time, I thought if I did enough, I could make my parents hate me, because it’s what I deserved. But for everything I tried, they kept giving me chance after chance.”
“So, then I attempted suicide, twice, and I couldn’t even do that right.” She groaned and wiped at her eyes again. The cuffs of the shirt were nearly soaked. “I realized that God or the universe or whomever clearly wanted me to suffer and to live with my guilt, but in the midst of trying to punish myself, I failed to realize that all I’d done was cause my parents more pain.”
“Day of my high school graduation, I woke up at the crack of dawn to pack up my bags, told my parents that I was going out with some friends, but I’d be home by 7—and I haven’t seen or spoken with them since.”
She clapped and lifted her hands. “And there you have it. You’ve now seen me naked; you’ve seen me cry, and now you know that I’m a murderer—”
“You’re not a murderer, Kaya,” he was finally able to complete his sentence, still very much in shock over what she’d disclosed. “And what happened to your brother wasn’t your fault.”
Chris watched her demeanor soften, shifting from her previous facetious tone to a more somber tone. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“I’m saying it because it’s the truth. You were a child.”
She shrugged sadly. “So was he.”
“That still doesn’t make it your fault.”
She turned away from where he sat across from her. She hadn’t even realized he’d moved from his initial position by the window. Untangling her legs, she moved the pillow to the side and stood in front of him. “Why are you so nice to me? You should be running for the hills.”
Chris brought his hands to her waist and pulled her in between his spread legs. “Why do you keep asking questions you already know the answers to?”
“Even after everything I’ve done?” She whispered, emotion betraying her for the umpteenth time that day. “You—you still—you still feel….like that about me?”
“You’re stubborn, impulsive, argumentative, flippant, and undoubtedly one of the most complicated women I’ve ever met.” He slowly stood up, never once breaking eye contact as he cupped her face, fingers brushing away the dampness of her flushed cheeks. “And yet, seeing you smile is the highlight of my day.”
She chuckled and nervously cleared her throat. “So, was today subpar? Like, medium light? Half-light? It all went downhill after 12pm.”
He shook his head and kissed her forehead. “You are, in fact, a hot mess.”
Her fingers grasped at his sleeves. “I really am sorry about ruining your evening.”
“You didn’t ruin my evening, Kaya.” He brought his hand to her hair, pushing back the tendrils that had fallen from her updo. “Thank you for opening to me. I know that wasn’t easy.”
“It’s a lot easier opening up my legs,” she muttered, watching as he closed his eyes. “I’m sorry—you’re right. It’s—it’s not easy, and I don’t like talking about….feelings.” Her eyes lifted as she chewed on her bottom lip. “But, I do have feelings for you.” She shut her eyes and licked her top lip. “And there’s something else I need to tell you.”
His gaze softened. “Anything.”
It was so simple, the opportunity was available, the setting was perfect. She’d already told him the hardest part, now all she had to do was tell him the rest. The problem though, was that what she’d shared hadn’t changed much. It only helped him to understand her better. It would potentially improve their relationship.
This would destroy it.
She cleared her throat again. “If you tell anyone I’m capable of crying, I will smother you in your sleep.”
He chuckled and kissed her temple. “It’s late. I’m going to shower.” He studied her. “Try not to get into any more trouble, yeah?”
She smiled softly. “I make no promises.”
He gave her side a gentle squeeze before yawning as he walked back into the bedroom. Finally alone, she fell back onto the sofa and hugged the pillow against her body. Kaya felt both disgust and frustration. If there was a perfect moment to tell him, that was it, and now it was gone.
She was running out of time
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TAGS: @islandvamp @toni9 @destinyg237 @tashawar @valkryienymph @letsshamelessqueen-m @missyperle @kpizzletrash @brittyevans @mani-lifes @amorestevens @periodtcevans @hello-therree @shegoesbyarose @lettytheletdown @yanniebunnie @iwrite4poc @nycoledon @fangurlingismyforte @babe-im-bi @amirra88 @cocoamoonmalfoy @goldenrosexx @liquorlaughslove @ljstraightnochaser @jurneesjourney @bestyums-ever84 @notacamelthatsmywife @champagnesugamama @cest-la69vie @yanniebunny5151 @goldenrosexx​
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fangurlingismyforte · 5 days ago
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mutuals I am sneaking up behind you and gently placing this on your head
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fangurlingismyforte · 7 days ago
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fangurlingismyforte · 7 days ago
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the wait was so SO worth it oh my god THIS WAS SO PERFECT?? THEIR RELATIONSHIP? THE ANGST? THE SECRETS?
THEY. FINALLY. CONFESSED. BYEKSUEKWUEEKUSJSIE I'm sorry you've left me incoherent
to top it all of there's still a secret left and I hope it's not as serious as I'm thinking it to be YOU WON'T HURT US LIKE THAT RIGHT?
lastly, fuck that asshole
𝙎𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝗈𝖿 𝗟𝗼𝘃𝗲 | seven
Parings: CEO!Chris Hemsworth x Stripper!OC // Words: 7.8K // Type: Series // Taglist: Yes/No (Inbox me to be tagged or removed) Warnings: Sexual harassment, racial themes, discussions pertaining to child death, miscarriage, alcohol/drug use, and suicide attempts. Angst.
A/N: I'm so sorry for the inexcusable delay in updates. This chapter is hella long and perhaps should have been split into two, but I promised ya'll some answers in the last chapter, so here they are!
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“What is that haircut?”
“Why are you zooming in?”
Kaya said nothing, continuing to pinch her fingers to gain a closer look, her smile widening by the second. “Holy shit, you weren’t kidding. “
Chris rolled his eyes. “All children go through phases.”
“This is beyond a phase, my friend. Don’t even get me started on the outfit.” As she erupted in yet another fit of giggles, he took advantage of the opportunity to snatch the iPad away from her.
“Go to sleep.”
Quieting herself down, she wiped at her eyes. “No. Come on. I’m enjoying this, and like you said, you were a dumb kid. How were you supposed to know these photos would haunt you till’ the end of time?”
“Only if they get out.”
“Don’t tempt me with a good time, sir.”
Chris closed the app and looked over at her. “What about you?”
Kaya’s brow lifted. “What about me?”
“What about your phases?”
She snorted. “Absolutely not.” He continued to stare her down, prompting her to cave, a surprising move even for her. Kaya’s tenacity was typically much stronger than that. “Fine.”
She grabbed her phone and unlocked it, opening Google Photos and scrolling mindlessly. She knew that any horrifically embarrassing snapshots would be from as far back as her library went. The older the photo, the higher the likelihood she would regret ever caving.
It took roughly two minutes for her to locate a set, her eyes shutting and a small moan leaving her partially closed mouth.
He smirked. “Found it?”
“Shut up.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
“You’re going to make me regret this, aren’t you?”
“Without a doubt.”
She couldn’t help it. She laughed. “At least you’re honest.” Blowing out a breath, she issued a formal forewarning. “In my defense, I was young and dumb.”
“How is that diff—fine, I will reserve my judgment.”
“Liar.” When he said nothing else, she took another deep breath and gradually pulled her phone away from her breast, twisting her wrist so that he could see the screen. “I give you, thebaddestputa69.”
She watched the corner of his lips lift upward as he fought off a smile in favor of a smirk. “Hotmail or aol?” Her surprise at his knowledge of the fallen email servers must have shown because he commented, “I’m old, not ancient.”
She matched his smirk and leaned over to whisper. “Hotmail. Definitely hotmail.”
“AIM username?”
“Come on, the same as my email. I wasn’t creative enough to have multiple aliases.”
He chuckled, grabbing her phone to examine the photo. “I certainly do not miss the peace sign era.”
“I’m pretty sure I used that same pose in all of my photos back then.”
He gestured to the plastered graphic that read ‘jealousy is a disease, get well soon’. “With the same masterful level of editing, I’m sure.”
“But of course, blingee and picnik were a staple.”
A comfortable silence befell them as he returned her phone, and she quickly swiped up to close the app. Kaya was grateful that he didn’t swipe right or left, something she was expecting him to do, if she was being completely honest with herself.
Kaya yawned and naturally laid her head on his shoulder as she reached over to grab the book she was reading when they somehow got on the topic of rebellious and wild phases of days of past.
“Are we th—”
“Finish that sentence, and I will personally throw you out of this damn plane myself.”
Kaya looked over at him, eyebrows furrowed, and mouth pronounced. “It’s a legitimate question.”
“No, it was a legitimate question. However, it stopped being one when you asked me the fifth time.”
“I’m just trying to keep the conversation going. Damn.”
“No, you’re just trying to pester me.”
“Look, it’s obvious you don’t want to hear me talk anymore, so I’m just going to shut my mouth for the remainder of the flight.” He snorted. “What?”
“We both know that’s not possible.” He finally broke his gaze from his phone as he looked over with that knowing smirk that she despised. “You always have to have the last word.”
“That is not true.”
“Kaya, you’re like a child.”
“Keep it up, and you’ll be the one who’s personally tossed from this jet.”
“See what I mean.”
Groaning, she threw her hands up and shook the book in her right hand. “This is the second book in this series.”
“And?”
“And I started the series when we were still on the taxi.”
He shrugged. “Read slower.”
“Chris!”
He laughed, reaching to place his hand on her thigh as she sighed while banging her head back against the headrest. “Relax.”
“Don’t you think if I could, I would?”
“You were doing great five minutes ago.”
“That was in the past.”
“Next time, we’re taking separate jets.”
She didn’t know why but hearing him refer to future happenings both excited and saddened her, for more reasons than one. She cleared her throat. “This is a work trip, right?” He looked down at her as she placed the book down on the ground and held onto his bicep. “You know, something for your company.”
He studied her for a moment and looked up, closing his eyes as he laid his head back against the headrest. “I have the cover of this month’s GQ Italia.”
“Fancy,” she remarked, still unsatisfied with his answer-non answer. “So, I was right. This is a work thing.”
Chris thought about what she said, what she asked, as well as his response before he replied. “They offered to contract a photographer in LA.”
Brows scrunched, she had to ask, now more confused than she was just a few minutes ago. “So why go to them?”
His silence only irked her, the seconds dragging into minutes, which felt like hours. Frustrated and impatient, she called his name again. “Chris-”
“Jesus,” was all she heard before his lips were on hers, palm of his hand pressed against her cheek. Everything else after that was a sensual blur. His other hand moved to her hip, pulling her onto his lap, never once breaking their kiss. She placed her hands on his shoulders, giving a light squeeze, inching her body closer to his, close enough to feel the heat that always emanated over him.
And then, it was over.
Eyes fluttering and breath staggering, she nearly whined when he ran his thumb over her swollen bottom lip.
“This isn’t work for me.”
----
“This is our room?”
Chris looked up and chuckled, watching Kaya spin around the middle, eyes soaking in their suite. He placed her bag near the closet while crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.
“It is.”
Kaya nodded and grabbed the bottom of her sweatshirt, tugging it over her head. She extended her arm out and turned around, lifting a brow. “And we have maid service, correct?”
He eyed her. “Of course.”
Kaya smirked and let the garment fall to the floor.
Chris chuckled. “You wanna explain that?”
“What?” She played innocent, fingers toying with the waistband of her joggers as she began to shimmy out of them. “Staying in a fancy hotel where I don’t have t0 clean up after myself?” She walked toward him, moving to grab her suitcase so that she could find her next outfit. “Granted, we have the maid service at home, but—” Both Christopher and Kaya paused at her statement, equally surprised by how easily it flowed, but more so with the statement itself.
Defense immediately kicked in and Kaya cleared her throat. “I mean, ya know, your place.” She refused to make eye contact that exceeded ten seconds, grabbing the handle of her suitcase and dragging it in the direction of what looked like the bathroom.
“Dibs.”
Her feet weren’t moving fast enough for her liking. In fact, they were slow enough that Chris was somehow able to cross the room and grab her by her arm. She looked up, managing to remain calm while inwardly panicking.
God, please don’t let him ask anything.
“Don’t take too long.”
She swallowed. “Why?”
Her grip on the handle tightened when he moved his hand to her face, the back of it brushing against her cheek. Had he been paying close enough attention, he would have noticed the way she shivered at his touch.
“You want dinner, don’t you?”
-----
“This isn’t exactly what I meant.”
Kaya looked up from her pizza, pausing mid chew. “What? Pizza in Italy? This is goals.”
He intended to take her to a fine restaurant, one where only the elite could afford to dine. Instead, she requested pizza delivered to their room. Kaya never ceased to surprise him. “And why are you eating pizza with a fork?”
She shrugged, adjusting the thin strap of her shirt. “Because pizza is messy, and my life's already messy enough. I avoid when I can.”
Chris didn’t say anything, simply watching her eat. She caught his gaze and looked away. If she could, she’d go back in time and stop herself from ever saying what she did. It’d ruined everything. He’d been acting different around her since, and she hated that. She also hated that she hated it.
Since when did she give a flying fuck about what people thought of her? Let alone him.
It was out of character for her, and she didn’t like it.
She didn’t like it at all.
Similarly, Chris also found it difficult to focus on anything other than the encounter from earlier, but not for the reasons Kaya thought.
Not even close.
“So, what’s the agenda for this trip?”
He chuckled and brought the champagne to his lips. “And ruin the surprise?”
Her eyes narrowed as she replaced the fork with her fingers so that she could eat the crust piece by piece. “What surprise?”
“What kind of question is that? Who gives away a surprise?”
“Are you capable of ever just answering my questions with a straight answer?”
He pretended to think. “I could.”
“But?”
“Where’s the fun in that?”
“You and fun? Never realized they were synonymous.”
“I’d like to think we have fun.”
“We have sex. Really, really, great sex.”
“You don’t consider that fun?”
“Fun isn’t a strong enough word to describe it.” He lifted a brow, and she scoffed, tossing a red pepper packet in his direction. “Stop it. I am trying to have a mature conversation here.”
“Not quite sure how possible that is when both parties are inebriated.”
“Bullshit. You know damn well neither one of us is drunk. You haven’t seen me drunk. Hell, I haven’t seen me drunk in a while.”
The way her tone changed toward the end of her sentence garnered his interest. “Why not?”
She looked at him, her smile faltering as she nervously cleared her throat. “I—uh—I get really bad migraines, and Excedrin is the only thing that works for me.” Telling him the truth, well, a fraction of the truth, felt strange yet relieving, probably because she’d spent so much of her life hiding and lying that the truth was unfamiliar territory. “Needless to say, meds and alcohol? Never really a good combo.”
“You’re drinking now.”
“I haven’t taken any medicine yet.”
“Maybe you won’t have to.”
She smiled sadly. “I will.” A beat. “It’s all I have.” Kaya snatched another piece of her crust and swallowed fully before explaining. “That’s why my sleep schedule, if you can even call it that, is so fucked up.”
He thought about it. “Excedrin has caffeine.”
“An insane amount.”
“It helps your migraines—”
“And keeps me up in return.” When he grew quiet, she offered. “Trust me. The insomnia is much better than the pain.”
“I’m sorry.”
She grimaced, eyes darting in either direction. “Why?”
He sighed and ran his hands all over his face. “That’s why you get so upset when I wake you up.”
“I wouldn’t say upset.”
“You threatened to slit my throat in my sleep.”
“Okay, maybe I was a little upset,” she confessed, and they shared a laugh before his tone grew serious again.
“I’ll be mindful of that.” Head tilted to the side, a sign she was still confused, he continued. “So that you can sleep.”
She smiled teasingly, abandoning the last bit of her food, and pushing her plate to the side. “Is that consideration I hear?”
“It is.”
The way he was looking at her, the lack of typical sarcasm in his tone, it was both welcoming and conflicting. Crawling across the floor, she moved his plate to the side and climbed into his lap.
Hands on his shoulders, she lowered her voice and whispered into his ear. “Well, I’m up right now.”
He made a sound and brought his hands to her hips. “You are.” Her eyes shut when his lips moved to her shoulder. “You should get some sleep.”
Immediately, she coiled back and glared. “Are you serious right now?” He laughed, which only upset her further as he stood up, her legs locking around his waist. “It’s been at least 8 hours.”
“You keeping a timer or something?”
“Look.” She waited for him to place her on the bed before she grabbed the bottom of his shirt and tugging so that he laid back on the mattress. She quickly climbed on top of him. “If there’s one thing I know about us, we are ideal intimate partners. Our sexual chemistry is astronomical.”
His eyes drank her in. “Is that it?”
“Is what it?”
His voice lowered. “Is that all you think we have?”
At that moment, Kaya realized a couple of things. This was wrong. She was suddenly very much uncomfortable. And this was a mistake. This was why she didn’t tell the truth. It meant putting yourself at risk for being vulnerable.
She was never good with that.
Clearing her throat, she climbed off him and flashed a crafty smile. “I’m gonna go shower.” She couldn’t handle seeing his face, so she turned around, purposely pretending she had to look around the room to search for her luggage.
“You should know I hate sleeping with blankets.” Kaya needed to redirect the conversation to another topic. This was becoming all too much for her.
He sat up and rolled his shoulders. “So, strip the bed? Got it.”
“Absolutely not. I could freeze.”
“You just said—”
Kaya stood by the door that led to the living room area and smiled sadly. “I’m a hot ass mess, Chris.” A beat. “The sooner you accept that, the better.”
-------
We need to talk when you get a chance. Please?
No matter how many times she looked at the phone, a new incoming gray message never appeared. She waited and waited, even scrolling up only for it to bounce back with no change.
She missed Nia. She missed their banter. She missed making tik toks with her. And she especially missed the advice giving, of which she could desperately use right about now.
Something was happening between them. With her and Chris. Of which she didn’t know, nor did she understand. It drove her mad because it was a new experience, one where she didn’t feel as though she always had to walk on eggshells.
Being with Chris….
“God.” She ran her hand over her face. What the hell was she doing? She wasn’t with Chris. Not like that, anyway. This was a business transaction. They were both using each other for selfish purposes.
Maybe it was the sex. Nia always warned her that behind every sexual encounter, there was at least some trace of feelings.
Kaya always thought that was bullshit.
Now….now she wasn’t so sure.
“You alright?”
She looked up from her chair and saw Chris walk in. She chewed the inside of her cheek as he sat down in the chair opposite of her. Kaya took in his wardrobe, so casual and laid back. She’d never seen him in denim before, but he looked good.
She didn’t even know the photographer, but she was a fan. A billionaire in Levi’s? Iconic.
“How does it feel to dress like us common folk?”
“Poor.” He winked as she glared. “We should be done soon.”
“Don’t rush on my part. The snacks here are delicious, and who knows, I could play dress up.” She wiggled her brows and straightened when there was a knock on the door.
“Sorry to interrupt,” the photographer spoke up and offered Kaya a friendly smile. “You’re Kaya, yes? I’m Elena.”
Kaya was surprised by the fact that this woman was both speaking to her and actually knew who she was, so her response was delayed. “Yes. It’s nice to meet you.” She offered her hand and noticed the woman was staring at her. Welp. It was nice while it lasted. “Is there something I can help you with?”
“I’m sorry,” she apologized but continued to stare. “It’s just...has anyone ever told you that you have amazing bone structure?”
Kaya sputtered. “Not unless they wanted something from me.”
Elena smiled. “Well, I suppose this is no different.”
“I don’t understand,” Kaya asked, looking over at Chris. He was surprisingly quiet.
“How about we get some shots of the both of you?”
She immediately protested. “Oh no. I—I’m just here for moral support.”
“You did say you wanted to play dress up,” he reminded. She glared. Of course he would choose to speak up now.
She turned her narrowed eyes on him and harshly whispered. “Not while being photographed.”
He placed his hand over hers. “Relax.”
Kaya remembered that they weren’t alone and therefore, had to keep up the act. Even if it was starting to feel less and less like acting.
“I’m used to people watching, not photographing.” He lifted a brow. Laughing, she slapped his chest and took a deep breath. She looked over at Elena. “Will I at least get to see them before you pick which ones to use? If any.”
“Of course.”
Kaya caved. “Fine.” He kissed the top of her head and mouthed a thank you. “You owe me.”
“Sure, I do,” he dismissed, slapping her on her ass as Elena grabbed her to drag her away.
“Time to make magic.”
-----
It was a bad idea, one of many that had occurred, Kaya realized.
When she joked about wanting to play dress—up, she didn’t think that it would actually happen. She didn’t think that she’d become involved in his shoot. Kaya especially didn’t expect to have as much….fun as she did.
And she hated that, too. The fact that she managed to smile and laugh more in one setting than she had in, hell, longer than she could remember. She didn’t like it. She didn’t like it at all.
She really, really didn’t like the way Chris looked at her every time she walked onto set in a new look, and there were a couple of them. The way he focused on her, eyes taking in every bit of her form, all the way down from her shoes up to her hair. Like he didn’t want to look away. Like he couldn’t look away. She despised the way he held her when they were photographed together, often being the reason for her smile or laughter with his comments that he whispered into her ear, sneaking in a kiss against her temple or holding her against him.
It was all so domestic and sweet, and it made no sense.
He was starting to make no sense.
And she especially didn’t understand why she was putting off leaving the bathroom, having sat on the toilet for at least 15 minutes.
As if on cue, two loud knocks on the door pulled her from her thoughts.
“I’m coming, damnit.”
“That’s what you said last time. Come on, Kaya.” She was both surprised and annoyed that it was Chris. She expected it to be members of the glam team that he’d hired to help her prepare for the GQ function he was invited to, and of course, she was forced to accompany him. Turns out he wasn’t just chosen for the cover. He was man of the year. “We’re going to be late.”
“Maybe you should just leave me behind,” she muttered.
“Maybe I can just kick this damn door down,” he countered.
“Then you’ll have to pay for the damages.”
“Then I’ll buy the damn hotel,” he shot back testily. “I’m not going to ask you again, Kaya.”
She scowled and rolled her neck. Kaya knew he was being serious. The bastard could buy his way out of anything.
If only….
Blowing out a deep breath, she swallowed and stood, holding up her dress. It was undoubtedly beautiful, gold, a slit in the middle of her chest and on her left leg exposing more skin than she would have thought appropriate. Her curls were styled in a fancy updo, and her makeup was equally as bold as her dress, finalized with a red lip. She knew that she looked good, and that’s what scared her.
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Chris had been looking at her like that all day, and she couldn’t keep handling it.
If she could even consider it handling. Managing was perhaps a better term. Poorly managing was the perfect term.
Kaya ripped open the door and plastered on a fake smile. “Happy?”
And there it was, his eyes widened and softened as he gave her a onceover. “And don’t tell me I look beautiful, cause’ I already know it.”
Kaya figured if she said it for him, she wouldn’t have to deal with the weird and uncomfortable knotting in her stomach that she experienced every time he complimented her.
And it worked, he said nothing, only helping to hold up her dress as they walked to the SUV that would escort them. In the car, she was also pleasantly surprised that he didn’t attempt to make small talk with her during the drive. She was certain, however, that it was because he took at least three different work calls during that time.
She made drafted Tik Toks in the meantime.
When they finally arrived, Kaya nearly ran out of the car right then and there.
“Is that a red carpet?” Her mouth dropped. “What the hell? You said nothing about having to walk a damn carpet that is red.”
He chuckled. Kaya realized his hand was on the exposed portion of her thigh. “Stay close to me, and I’ll take care of you. You’ll be fine.”
Kaya was used to having eyes on her, but that didn’t mean she liked it, especially when it didn’t involve money being thrown her way. “I don’t have to say anything, do I?”
He squeezed her thigh. “You’ll most likely receive compliments.”
“I can handle that,” she spoke more to herself than him. “Just long as no one asks if I prefer cats over dogs or whatever shit they ask.”
He laughed quietly and looked at her. “You ready?”
No. “Yes.”
Chris climbed out the car first so that he could help her out of the vehicle, and as soon as she stepped out, she cursed to herself. There were so many damn people. People taking photographs. People being photographed. People helping both the people the photographed and the photographers. And then there was her. She felt so out of place.
If he wasn’t already holding her hand, she would have grabbed for his.
Kaya used her left hand to hold up her dress, while making sure that she stayed close to Chris who led the way, smiling for the camera while sparing her glances every so often to assess her level of comfort.
Kaya played along, evoking a smile as she posed with him for a few photos. That’s when it started again. Like the photoshoot from a few hours ago, she found herself feeling less forced and more comfortable. Like, it was natural.
Like it was real.
Kaya was eventually allowed to stand to the side as he gave a few interviews, some in English, most in Italian. She’d meant to ask him earlier when the hell he learned to speak so many languages. This was the third she’d learned of. She had a feeling at least one or two journalists asked about her, because he would look in her direction and shoot a wink or something of the sort.
Her smile was a natural reaction.
The process was less daunting than she anticipated, not that she’d ever admit that to him. It was once they moved inside that Kaya realized they’d yet to reach the hard part. That hardest part was “socializing” with the guests, many of which were white, spicy white at best. She spotted some minorities but found that they were just as distant as the rest.
The vim of the event was welcoming, however, which confused Kaya to some extent. She simplified it down to the event was nice, the people were trash, and Chris was both an ass and a gentleman for forcing her to come.
He’d introduced her to a few people, most of which spoke poor English. That, she could acknowledge, was nice. Not the strained English, but his obvious concern for her wellbeing. He was going out of his way to make her feel as comfortable as he could.
It was also irritating because it resurfaced those damn knots.
They were seated at a table, and he was texting someone when she leaned over and tugged on his sleeve. Kaya also took a moment to appreciate how nice he looked. The man was something sinful in a suit. “I think I know him.”
He looked up, immediately locking his phone. “Who?”
She gestured with her chin. “The guy over there talking to the girl with the green dress. But don’t look at them.”
His eyes lifted to the ceiling. Right before he proceeded to look right in that direction.
She laughed despite her irritation. “What did I literally just fucking say?”
“I’ll never understand why people want to do something without actually doing it. I don’t have the time.” She shook her head. He was so impatient. “And how do you know him?”
She lifted a brow. He asked with a newfound sense of urgency. If she didn’t know any better, she would have guessed it came from a place of jealousy.
Kaya studied the stranger across the room again when her eyes widened. “I know. He’s that actor from that porn movie we watched.”
“We don’t watch porn, Kaya. We make it.”
“Stop it.” She leaned closer, hating that her smile contrasted the frustration she felt with how vulgar he was speaking in such a public setting. “And you know the movie where they…..ya know, basically the whole time, and he kept asking in that godawful delivery, are you lost, baby girl?”
Her equally terrible impression caused him to laugh quietly. “I think that is him.”
“I told you.” She spoke a little louder than she would have liked due to her excitement at being correct. “He looks better on screen.”
Chris glanced over at him once more and scoffed. “He’s scrawny.”
“Sir, not everyone is like you and built like a fucking tanker.”
“Not my problem.”
Kaya rolled her eyes and gathered her dress. “I’ll be back. I have to use the restroom.” She stood and leaned over, arms around him from behind as she whispered. “Try not to be too much of a dick while I’m gone, okay?”
He turned to look at her. “And where’s the fun in that?”
Turns out finding the bathroom was a harder task than she’d anticipated. She’d asked one of the servers while maneuvering through the crowd, but it also turned out that Kaya wasn’t the best with directions. She did find it, though.
Eventually.
Kaya was navigating her way back to Chris when she was stopped by a man in a suit along the way.
He was of average height, average build, and average attraction. She was immediately annoyed.
“Hi,” Kaya greeted with a tight smile.
“Hello,” he smiled. Add in average dental health. “You are very beautiful.”
Kaya realized he didn’t have an accent, either. American, most likely. “Uhh, thank you.” When she moved to walk past him, he blocked her. “Sir, I really should—”
“How much?”
Her eyes darted to either side. “I’m sorry?”
“Money is no issue, as I’m sure you can see, and I’d like you for a week.” He stepped closer, bringing his hand to trail it down her arm. “Longer even, perhaps.”
“Sir, I have no idea what you are talking about, and please do not touch me.” It wasn’t so much of a request as much as it was a demand. “Now, I really should—”
“You’re not American.” Kaya continued to be confused as hell when his eyes lit up with excitement. “That explains why you look so exotic.” Confusion easily morphed into rage as she finally caught on to what he was referring to. “I bet you feel di—”
“You’re disgusting,” she hissed, pulling away from him. “I am not a fucking prostitute—”
“Call it what you want, girl,” he dismissed. “I don’t judge. I can pay you well.”
“Go fuck yourself, you sick son of a bitch,” she cursed, turning away when he grabbed her arm. “Let me go.”
“You think that you’re special?” He’d taken on another tone, one that conveyed his anger at being rejected. “The fuckin’ stall I just pissed in is worth more than you, bitch.”
Kaya refused to allow him to see her cry, but she’d be lying if she tried to say that his words didn’t sting, especially his next verbal attack.
“You can slap on that expensive dress and let Hemsworth make you feel special, but I know, you know, and everyone else in this fucking place knows that you’re nothing but a cheap, illegal whore—” Panic arose when he moved his hand to the exposed skin of her thigh, squeezing tightly. His hand started to inch upward when Kaya acted on instinct. He cursed aloud while Kaya gasped as she realized that she’d silenced him with her fist dead square in the middle of his face. “You fucking bitch!”
Shock and fear took over as Kaya gathered the bottom of her dress and ran, as much as the gown and her heels would allow, that is. Certain he was going to chase her for retribution, she consistently looked back, unaware that she needed to be just as aware of what was in front as what was behind.
She shrieked and immediately went to pull herself away from the strong body she’d collided with.
“Kaya.” Refocusing her attention, she looked up and realized it was Chris. “Where the hell—” He stopped amid his statement when he took in her appearance and realized that she was crying. “What happened?”
“Nothing.” Kaya looked down, speaking more to herself than him. Not that it mattered. He was judging based on what he saw instead of what she said. He’d learned by now that her words rarely matched the truth. “Let’s just go—”
“Kaya,” he repeated, softer. Chris brought his hands to her face, forcing her to meet his gaze as he asked again, slowly. “What happened?” A strike of anger flashed in his blue eyes. “Did someone touch you?”
“No,” she answered, quickly. Too quickly.
The anger escalated exponentially. “Who? Tell me.”
Kaya could have slapped herself. She wasn’t helping the situation. She was making it worse. “It doesn’t matter, I hit him, and now he’s probably going to sue you—”
“Where is he?” Chris was looking behind her, eyes flaming. He was livid. “Show me. Now.”
“No.” Speaking was becoming an increasing challenge, especially against the backdrop of overwhelming emotions. Everything she’d been feeling, preventing herself from feeling, and afraid to acknowledge was gradually bubbling to the surface. “Just—just let me go back to the hotel. I’m messing everything up for you.”
He calmed for a second, realizing what was happening. Chris was unfamiliar with this side of her. Unfamiliar with seeing her so vulnerable. “What?”
Kaya suddenly realized that her eyes were burning again. She was fighting back tears. “I’ll give you back the money for the day, it’s—it’s fine, you’re better off without me here—”
Her offer to pay him incensed Chris. This wasn’t about the money. It stopped being about the money a long time ago, even if he hadn’t realized that until today. “I don’t want the fucking money, Kaya.”
She shook her head and closed her eyes. “Don’t—don’t say that.”
“Why? It’s the truth.”
“Please,” she plead. Control over her emotions was a battle she’d all but lost at that point. Her words, she was certain, would be next.
He raised his voice. Chris sensed, saw that she was uncomfortable, but he also realized that this was what she needed. A push. “Why?”
“Because this all about the fucking money, okay?” She matched his volume, accepting that her tears were going to fall no matter how much she willed them not to. She’d lost the war. “It has to be about the money, because if it isn’t then that means you care, and—you can’t, alright?”
He studied her, wondering if she realized this conversation was difficult for him too. He brought his hand to the side of her face. “Why is it so impossible for you to accept that I fucking care about you?”
She looked up, glistening eyes and wavering voice. “Because then I have to admit that I care about you too, and I can’t do that.” She spoke to herself, as if vocalizing it would cement a decision that was already out of her hands. “I won’t do it.”
“Why?” He pressed. Chris brought his other hand to the other side of her face, cupping it and moving closer. He gave zero fucks about where they were and who could have possibly overheard. “Why are you fighting this so hard?”
She pulled herself away from him, back colliding against the wall as she blurted, “because all I do is hurt the people I care about alright?” In that moment, Kaya realized she was so far gone that the point of return was no longer an option. Her mouth trembled as she struggled to form her next sentence, listing off names with her fingers as props. “Mami, Papi, Nia. Hell, my own brother is dead because of me.” A beat. “I’ll only hurt you, and I care about you too much to do that.”
“Kaya—"
A newfound heaviness started to weigh upon her chest, another blockade to her speech. “I’m standing here in a dress I can’t afford, a building I can’t even fucking pronounce, and with a man I don’t deserve.”
His voice lowered. “Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, I don’t deserve you?” Kaya looked at him, her eyes softening before she squinted, her face scrunching up in obvious pain.
He took note of this. As invested as Chris was in finally getting Kaya to open up about how she really felt, her wellbeing would always be his primary concern.
“Kaya.” He placed his hands on her waist, steadying her. “What’s wrong?”
“I—” She blinked several times, blinding lights obscuring her vision. “I—can’t—" Kaya felt the firmness of his chest, inhaled the scent of his cologne, and heard her name on his lips before everything faded to black.
-----
She awoke on her side, body clutched against a pillow, and a thin sheet covering half her body. Never one to take her time returning to her senses, she forced herself to sit up, eyes still scrunched from the sleep.
Looking down she realized she was dressed in only one of Chris’s dress shirts, her dress discarded.
Memory returned as Kaya replayed the events that transpired prior to her slumber. The photoshoot. The party. The asshole.
Chris.
“I don’t care. Tell them to send it in the mail or something.”
She recognized his voice traveling from the living room area, prompting her to swing her legs over the bed, her toes submerging into the soft carpet. She’d never been in such a fine hotel where the carpeting probably cost more than six months’ worth of rent on her one-bedroom apartment.
“Evans, I don’t give a flying fuck about any of that right now. You can handle it. I don’t care.”
Kaya contemplated remaining where she was, eavesdropping without being detected. She quickly decided against it. She’d done enough.
Her feet carried her out of the room, and she stood in the doorway where she saw he was standing against the massive window that provided a breathtaking overview of the city.
Again, she considered leaving him be, but he either had exceptional peripheral vision or caught her reflection in the window because he spun around. Kaya’s eyebrows furrowed when she realized he was still dressed in his suit, with the expectation of the jacket and dress shirt which were both discarded, leaving the white undershirt.
Uncomfortable with the way he was looking at her, more concern than that, she settled onto the sofa, pulling a decorative pillow to her chest as she crossed her legs.
“I have to go,” he spoke briefly before pulling the phone from his ear and hanging up.
Kaya swallowed. He’d yet to speak, so she took the opportunity to do so. “Still don’t believe me when I said I’m a hot mess?”
“What happened tonight, Kaya?”
“Which part?” She knew that playing coy wasn’t the best route, but she was forever stubborn and would fight until she had nothing left. “Where I ruined your evening, assaulted a millionaire, told you one of my deepest secrets, or fainted in your arms? There’s a lot.”
“All of it.”
She looked away and licked her lips. Kaya felt cornered, absolutely trapped. Emotionally. She’d always assumed being physically stuck would feel far more suffocating and frightening. She was wrong.
Kaya considered her options, though far and few in between. She could deflect. She was a master at that. She could redirect blame onto him. Call him out on even making her go on the trip, for not telling her ahead of time what to expect, maybe throw in a few insults. And lastly, the most frightening of them all, she could be honest.
That was the scariest of them all.
“I lied to you.” The words spilled out before she realized it, but Kaya accepted the fact that she was tired. There was only so much she could carry, and she’d reached her limits. “My—my parents aren’t dead. They still live in the same house in Parlier that I grew up in with Denes. He’s—he was my brother.” It felt strange talking about, verbalizing what she’d quietly struggled with for so many years. And yet, there was a peace that accompanied the release. “He was such a beautiful little boy, but….different. He didn’t talk much, life skills were….hard for him, and he had these fixations on certain things. He didn’t like change.”
“Kaya, you don’t—”
“When I was eleven, and he was eight, my parents found out they were pregnant. They’d been trying for so long….they were so happy.” She roughly wiped at her face to do away with the silent tears that fell. The crying, however, was inevitable. “One day, they had a checkup appointment, and the babysitter fell through, so they asked me to watch Denes.” She nodded slowly, reverting to the same rush of emotions she felt that day. “I was so….mad, because my friend had just gotten Guitar Hero, and I was supposed to walk down to her house so we could play it.” To that day, Kaya felt a strong surge of rage whenever she ran across a throwback picture or read an article referring to that game. It was a trigger.
“My parents promised that I could go when they returned, but I just couldn’t wait.” Her nose turned up with disgust, disgust directed 100% inward. “I just had to go play that stupid fucking game.”
“Denes loved birds. They were one of his fixations. They think—they think he saw one outside our living room window or something and walked outside to see if he could catch it because, of course, I forgot to lock the front door.” She stared off into space before closing her eyes. “I had just walked into my friend’s house when I heard someone scream like I’ve never heard a scream before.” Kaya tugged the pillow closer to her chest and lowered her head. “I ran back so fast because I thought—I thought I could help him. I thought I could save him.” Her voice cracked. “—But there was so much blood, and he was so hurt—he died in the middle of the street, bleeding, terrified, and it was all my fault.”
Chris closed his eyes and shook his head. “Kaya—”
“They never found the driver,” she added quietly, chewing on the inside of her cheek. “The shock of it all……it was too much for my mom, and she miscarried.” Kaya laughed, but there wasn’t a trace of humor. “I spiraled after Denes passed. Everything bad and terrible I could get myself into, I did. I—I skipped class, I partied, I drank, I tried drugs.” She scoffed. “I lost my virginity when I was thirteen to some guy whose name I still don’t know because I was so drunk.” She leaned back into the sofa, staring at the intricate pattern of the rug. “I just—at the time, I thought if I did enough, I could make my parents hate me, because it’s what I deserved. But for everything I tried, they kept giving me chance after chance.”
“So, then I attempted suicide, twice, and I couldn’t even do that right.” She groaned and wiped at her eyes again. The cuffs of the shirt were nearly soaked. “I realized that God or the universe or whomever clearly wanted me to suffer and to live with my guilt, but in the midst of trying to punish myself, I failed to realize that all I’d done was cause my parents more pain.”
“Day of my high school graduation, I woke up at the crack of dawn to pack up my bags, told my parents that I was going out with some friends, but I’d be home by 7—and I haven’t seen or spoken with them since.”
She clapped and lifted her hands. “And there you have it. You’ve now seen me naked; you’ve seen me cry, and now you know that I’m a murderer—”
“You’re not a murderer, Kaya,” he was finally able to complete his sentence, still very much in shock over what she’d disclosed. “And what happened to your brother wasn’t your fault.”
Chris watched her demeanor soften, shifting from her previous facetious tone to a more somber tone. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“I’m saying it because it’s the truth. You were a child.”
She shrugged sadly. “So was he.”
“That still doesn’t make it your fault.”
She turned away from where he sat across from her. She hadn’t even realized he’d moved from his initial position by the window. Untangling her legs, she moved the pillow to the side and stood in front of him. “Why are you so nice to me? You should be running for the hills.”
Chris brought his hands to her waist and pulled her in between his spread legs. “Why do you keep asking questions you already know the answers to?”
“Even after everything I’ve done?” She whispered, emotion betraying her for the umpteenth time that day. “You—you still—you still feel….like that about me?”
“You’re stubborn, impulsive, argumentative, flippant, and undoubtedly one of the most complicated women I’ve ever met.” He slowly stood up, never once breaking eye contact as he cupped her face, fingers brushing away the dampness of her flushed cheeks. “And yet, seeing you smile is the highlight of my day.”
She chuckled and nervously cleared her throat. “So, was today subpar? Like, medium light? Half-light? It all went downhill after 12pm.”
He shook his head and kissed her forehead. “You are, in fact, a hot mess.”
Her fingers grasped at his sleeves. “I really am sorry about ruining your evening.”
“You didn’t ruin my evening, Kaya.” He brought his hand to her hair, pushing back the tendrils that had fallen from her updo. “Thank you for opening to me. I know that wasn’t easy.”
“It’s a lot easier opening up my legs,” she muttered, watching as he closed his eyes. “I’m sorry—you’re right. It’s—it’s not easy, and I don’t like talking about….feelings.” Her eyes lifted as she chewed on her bottom lip. “But, I do have feelings for you.” She shut her eyes and licked her top lip. “And there’s something else I need to tell you.”
His gaze softened. “Anything.”
It was so simple, the opportunity was available, the setting was perfect. She’d already told him the hardest part, now all she had to do was tell him the rest. The problem though, was that what she’d shared hadn’t changed much. It only helped him to understand her better. It would potentially improve their relationship.
This would destroy it.
She cleared her throat again. “If you tell anyone I’m capable of crying, I will smother you in your sleep.”
He chuckled and kissed her temple. “It’s late. I’m going to shower.” He studied her. “Try not to get into any more trouble, yeah?”
She smiled softly. “I make no promises.”
He gave her side a gentle squeeze before yawning as he walked back into the bedroom. Finally alone, she fell back onto the sofa and hugged the pillow against her body. Kaya felt both disgust and frustration. If there was a perfect moment to tell him, that was it, and now it was gone.
She was running out of time
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TAGS: @islandvamp @toni9 @destinyg237 @tashawar @valkryienymph @letsshamelessqueen-m @missyperle @kpizzletrash @brittyevans @mani-lifes @amorestevens @periodtcevans @hello-therree @shegoesbyarose @lettytheletdown @yanniebunnie @iwrite4poc @nycoledon @fangurlingismyforte @babe-im-bi @amirra88 @cocoamoonmalfoy @goldenrosexx @liquorlaughslove @ljstraightnochaser @jurneesjourney @bestyums-ever84 @notacamelthatsmywife @champagnesugamama @cest-la69vie @yanniebunny5151 @goldenrosexx​
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fangurlingismyforte · 8 days ago
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Pride history posts on here seem almost exclusively to revolve around Stonewall which can leave the impression that America is the only place where anything important ever happened and obviously is not true so I have compiled a few links where you can learn about LGBTQ history in other countries! Feel free to add
The Brunswick Four and the Toronto raids in Canada 🇨🇦
Queer icons like Virginia Wolf, Oscar Wilde, and Freddie Mercury in Britain 🇬🇧
Cultural revolution in Weimar Germany 🇩🇪
The drag scene in Nigeria 🇳🇬
Gay and lesbian Mardi Gras in Australia 🇦🇺
Frida Kahlo and Mexicos fraught history 🇲🇽
Gay samurai in Japan 🇯🇵
Queer narratives erased by colonialism in Pakistan 🇵🇰
The modern world’s first legal same-sex marriages in the Netherlands 🇳🇱
The honoured Mahu (transgender individuals) in traditional Hawaiian culture 🌺
Hidden queer communities in communist Poland 🇵🇱
Husbands in ancient Egypt 🇪🇬
The Athens pride festival in Greece 🇬🇷
The Homosexual Movement of Liberation in Chile 🇨🇱
Gay rights protests in India 🇮🇳
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fangurlingismyforte · 9 days ago
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so true 🥺🥺
I am so proud. (w.m. x reader)
pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader
summary: Wanda is starting to think that you not coming out means you are not serious enough with her...
warnings: mentions of homophobia and unaccepting parents but I tried to keep it vague, some angst but mostly comfort fluff
word count: about 900
A/N: HAPPY PRIDE MY LOVES.
this fic is my way of OFFICIALLY coming out to y'all as bisexual :) I hope you enjoy!
this is completely self indulgent and loosely based on a dream more like nightmare I had.
also... finally my first wlw fic!
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(not my gif, credits to the owner)
"How long will you hide from them?" Wanda asked.
You sighed and looked down. "I told you... it's a stressful time for them and coming out now would mean their reaction coloured by their stress and-"
"Excuses, (Y/N). That's what you're good at." She walked out of your room and started to put on her shoes, as if she was going somewhere.
"It's not like that! Wanda, you know it's- hey, where are you going?"
"I'll be back in some time. Till then, maybe you should think about how serious you are about us."
The door slammed behind her but you were still processing her statement.
How did Wanda think you're not serious enough? Is that why she was so worked up about this?
Oh god...
You started cleaning up your apartment, just to busy yourself and not let your mind wander to the hurt you have caused Wanda but it was hard not to. Causing her pain was the last thing you wanted to do and yet here you were.
Usually whenever you two got into a fight it would easily be resolved and even if it was something serious and long lasting, you wouldn't relax until you figured out how to fix the problem.
This time, however, you knew there was only one way how but you weren't sure you were brave enough to walk down that path.
You had to, though, for Wanda if not for yourself.
Taking in a deep breath, you started to call your mother.
"Hi, honey. It's so good to hear from you. You rarely ever call. How are you?"
"I am good, mom. I was wondering if you and dad were free tonight? It's been really long and I wanted to talk to you guys about something."
"Of course, love. Is everything okay?"
"Yes, mom. Everything is fine." You tried to sound cheerful and reassuring though your nerves were already setting in, your hands shaking and sweating.
"Alright, dear. See you tonight then."
"See you."
+
Wanda came home that night - very late - to the sound of sobbing.
She immediately started towards your shared bedroom, only to find herself in a room full of scattered items, most of them being your childhood stuff.
You were sat on the floor next to the bed, clutching a pink and purple bracelet in your iron tight grip.
"Baby?" She whispered, her anger completely forgotten at the sheer sadness in your cries.
You turned towards her, sobbing harder at the reminder of the hurt you had caused her. "I am so sorry." You said. And then repeated it over and over.
"What's wrong?" She carefully maneuvered her way to you, engulfing you in her arms as soon as you werein reach. "Hey!" She held your cheek, lifting it so you were looking at her. "It's okay. Whatever it is, it'll be okay." And with that, she pressed your head to her chest, letting you feel her steady heartbeat and her kisses to your hair.
Wanda could use her powers, find out what's bothering you so much and fix it but something told her this should come from you. So she waited, ready to wait for however long you needed.
"It's okay, baby. I'm here."
"I never meant to hurt you." You mumbled after a while. "I was just so scared of their reaction." Your lips trembled again, visions of the dinner passing through your brain. Their disapproving glance at each other was enough of an answer to you even before their rejection had left their mouth.
"It's okay, I am not going anywhere if that's what you're worried about."
You bundled her shirt in your hand, inhaling deeply and looking at her.
"I came out to them." You said in a small and broken voice. Wanda knew instantly what was wrong.
"Oh, (Y/N)." She hugged you closer, impossibly tight and unrelenting.
She didn't want to let go. Ever. Infact, she wanted to protect you from everything cruel. Like your parents, for starters.
"I am so sorry. This is my fault, I rushed you into this."
"No, Wanda. I think I... I always knew it was gonna be this way. I was waiting and hoping for a change but... They were like this long before you."
She nodded, closing her eyes and steadying her emotions so she could be there for you. "Did you eat? Should I make something?"
You shook your head, content on just passing out in her arms. The day had been really wrong and your emotions were draining you.
"Okay. What do you want?"
"Sleep." You mumbled, already drowsy.
She chuckled. Even now, you were still adorable, still beautiful, still perfect.
"Alright, baby. Let's get you to bed." She helped you change your clothes and perform your nightly routine. Putting you under the covers, she soon joined you.
She opened her arms and you fell into them, desperately trying to forget their hostile gazes.
"I love you." You told her.
She rubbed your back, kissing your forehead lightly, moving her lips to your nose and, finally, your lips. "I love you so much. I am so proud of you."
"You are?"
"Of course. You're my strong girl."
You giggled, warmth spreading in your chest at her words.
"It's late, though. You should sleep. I'll be here with you the whole time, okay?"
You nodded, closing your eyes and sighing in contentment.
Apparently, their rejection didn't mean much when you were in her arms.
And maybe, just maybe, she had a visit to make to them tomorrow too. Just for a small piece of her mind.
here it is... tell me what you think! can you find out the smol Destiel reference that I added? thank you so much for reading!!
taglist is open now!
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fangurlingismyforte · 10 days ago
omg I think I prefer this version more than the jocky/playboy version that everyone portrays him as in college aus and NOW I WANT IT
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I like nerdy college bucky as like, a literature major with a minor in archaeology :) I don’t know…it sounds so cute
awwwe he likes books and stuff :’) maybe he reads to you or you meet in the library
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fangurlingismyforte · 10 days ago
thank you ❤️
Hey, im obsessed with Henry Cavill as Sherlock so can i request one were the reader is pregnant and they want to Tell Enola? Pleaseee
My Student
warnings: a whole lotta fluff
omg this concept, my heart🥺🥺
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(gif not mine)
It has been a few days now and you have been feeling sick every morning and occasionally in the evenings too. Sherlock, being the doting husband he was, had surprised you at how much he freaked out.
For a man who saw crime and death so much, it surprised you he would be so scared of something so small.
But he kept reminded you it was only because he cared about you, not that he was, you know, generally scared. His words.
For a detective and a woman capable of running her own school for girls, it took you both longer than you'd ever admit to realise what was really happening.
When the news was confirmed, you both immediately knew who to inform first. Enola.
Enola looked up to you as an elder sister. She was always finding time to meet you and spend time with you, helping you in your endeavours however she can. She would never actually say it out loud but she wanted to be just like you one day.
So when you and Sherlock managed to find her in a new place this time, she was more than happy to see you.
"(Y/N)!" She immediately hugged you, you returning the affection. You always wanted a little sister to take care of, nurture as your own into someone strong and equally beautiful. Although Enola's mother had already done pretty much all of that job, you still wanted to be a small part of her journey.
"Brother." She nodded, giving him a smile. Your husband nodded back, putting his arm around your waist and on your side of the stomach once again. Enola noticed that action, but didn't say anything.
Of course, nothing escaped her eyes. Just like your husband.
She always noticed him putting his arm on your back, around your waist. Or on your stomach.
When you entered her room, you found she had found a decent place for herself at last.
"So...." She wagged her eyebrows at you. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
You smiled. "Can't we just check up on you once in a while?" You asked, not knowing how to breach the topic you actually came here to talk about.
"You can, but the protective arm of Sherlock," she glanced at your stomach, "the wringing of your hands," she nodded at your hands, "and the awkward smile you're giving me right now suggests otherwise." She concluded.
"Oh let's just get it over with!" Your husband spoke. "(Y/N)'s pregnant." He bluntly stated.
Two gasps were heard. One from you, this is not how I imagined it, spilling out of your mouth quickly and quietly. Second from Enola, who had a grin spreading across her face.
"Oh my god oh my god oh my god!" She was jumping on the spot. "Congratulations!" She hugged you and, a rare sight, her brother. "Oh my god I will teach that baby everything."
"Like what?" You asked, smirking.
"Everything mother taught me! Tennis! Fighting! Everything!" Her face was growing red from how much she was smiling.
"Is she more excited than I was?" Sherlock teased.
"Definitely." You nodded.
"That baby will be my first student." She said proudly.
"Then we have nothing to be worried about." Sherlock said and you nodded.
it's been a loooong time since I wrote anything so thank you for requesting and hope this was good!! thank you so much for reading this!! feedback is well appreciated xoxo
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fangurlingismyforte · 10 days ago
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Reblog if you wouldn't mind some curious anons
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fangurlingismyforte · 10 days ago
Text
so me after writing this😭
I am so proud. (w.m. x reader)
pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader
summary: Wanda is starting to think that you not coming out means you are not serious enough with her...
warnings: mentions of homophobia and unaccepting parents but I tried to keep it vague, some angst but mostly comfort fluff
word count: about 900
A/N: HAPPY PRIDE MY LOVES.
this fic is my way of OFFICIALLY coming out to y'all as bisexual :) I hope you enjoy!
this is completely self indulgent and loosely based on a dream more like nightmare I had.
also... finally my first wlw fic!
Tumblr media
(not my gif, credits to the owner)
"How long will you hide from them?" Wanda asked.
You sighed and looked down. "I told you... it's a stressful time for them and coming out now would mean their reaction coloured by their stress and-"
"Excuses, (Y/N). That's what you're good at." She walked out of your room and started to put on her shoes, as if she was going somewhere.
"It's not like that! Wanda, you know it's- hey, where are you going?"
"I'll be back in some time. Till then, maybe you should think about how serious you are about us."
The door slammed behind her but you were still processing her statement.
How did Wanda think you're not serious enough? Is that why she was so worked up about this?
Oh god...
You started cleaning up your apartment, just to busy yourself and not let your mind wander to the hurt you have caused Wanda but it was hard not to. Causing her pain was the last thing you wanted to do and yet here you were.
Usually whenever you two got into a fight it would easily be resolved and even if it was something serious and long lasting, you wouldn't relax until you figured out how to fix the problem.
This time, however, you knew there was only one way how but you weren't sure you were brave enough to walk down that path.
You had to, though, for Wanda if not for yourself.
Taking in a deep breath, you started to call your mother.
"Hi, honey. It's so good to hear from you. You rarely ever call. How are you?"
"I am good, mom. I was wondering if you and dad were free tonight? It's been really long and I wanted to talk to you guys about something."
"Of course, love. Is everything okay?"
"Yes, mom. Everything is fine." You tried to sound cheerful and reassuring though your nerves were already setting in, your hands shaking and sweating.
"Alright, dear. See you tonight then."
"See you."
+
Wanda came home that night - very late - to the sound of sobbing.
She immediately started towards your shared bedroom, only to find herself in a room full of scattered items, most of them being your childhood stuff.
You were sat on the floor next to the bed, clutching a pink and purple bracelet in your iron tight grip.
"Baby?" She whispered, her anger completely forgotten at the sheer sadness in your cries.
You turned towards her, sobbing harder at the reminder of the hurt you had caused her. "I am so sorry." You said. And then repeated it over and over.
"What's wrong?" She carefully maneuvered her way to you, engulfing you in her arms as soon as you werein reach. "Hey!" She held your cheek, lifting it so you were looking at her. "It's okay. Whatever it is, it'll be okay." And with that, she pressed your head to her chest, letting you feel her steady heartbeat and her kisses to your hair.
Wanda could use her powers, find out what's bothering you so much and fix it but something told her this should come from you. So she waited, ready to wait for however long you needed.
"It's okay, baby. I'm here."
"I never meant to hurt you." You mumbled after a while. "I was just so scared of their reaction." Your lips trembled again, visions of the dinner passing through your brain. Their disapproving glance at each other was enough of an answer to you even before their rejection had left their mouth.
"It's okay, I am not going anywhere if that's what you're worried about."
You bundled her shirt in your hand, inhaling deeply and looking at her.
"I came out to them." You said in a small and broken voice. Wanda knew instantly what was wrong.
"Oh, (Y/N)." She hugged you closer, impossibly tight and unrelenting.
She didn't want to let go. Ever. Infact, she wanted to protect you from everything cruel. Like your parents, for starters.
"I am so sorry. This is my fault, I rushed you into this."
"No, Wanda. I think I... I always knew it was gonna be this way. I was waiting and hoping for a change but... They were like this long before you."
She nodded, closing her eyes and steadying her emotions so she could be there for you. "Did you eat? Should I make something?"
You shook your head, content on just passing out in her arms. The day had been really wrong and your emotions were draining you.
"Okay. What do you want?"
"Sleep." You mumbled, already drowsy.
She chuckled. Even now, you were still adorable, still beautiful, still perfect.
"Alright, baby. Let's get you to bed." She helped you change your clothes and perform your nightly routine. Putting you under the covers, she soon joined you.
She opened her arms and you fell into them, desperately trying to forget their hostile gazes.
"I love you." You told her.
She rubbed your back, kissing your forehead lightly, moving her lips to your nose and, finally, your lips. "I love you so much. I am so proud of you."
"You are?"
"Of course. You're my strong girl."
You giggled, warmth spreading in your chest at her words.
"It's late, though. You should sleep. I'll be here with you the whole time, okay?"
You nodded, closing your eyes and sighing in contentment.
Apparently, their rejection didn't mean much when you were in her arms.
And maybe, just maybe, she had a visit to make to them tomorrow too. Just for a small piece of her mind.
here it is... tell me what you think! can you find out the smol Destiel reference that I added? thank you so much for reading!!
taglist is open now!
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fangurlingismyforte · 11 days ago
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I am so proud. (w.m. x reader)
pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader
summary: Wanda is starting to think that you not coming out means you are not serious enough with her...
warnings: mentions of homophobia and unaccepting parents but I tried to keep it vague, some angst but mostly comfort fluff
word count: about 900
A/N: HAPPY PRIDE MY LOVES.
this fic is my way of OFFICIALLY coming out to y'all as bisexual :) I hope you enjoy!
this is completely self indulgent and loosely based on a dream more like nightmare I had.
also... finally my first wlw fic!
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(not my gif, credits to the owner)
"How long will you hide from them?" Wanda asked.
You sighed and looked down. "I told you... it's a stressful time for them and coming out now would mean their reaction coloured by their stress and-"
"Excuses, (Y/N). That's what you're good at." She walked out of your room and started to put on her shoes, as if she was going somewhere.
"It's not like that! Wanda, you know it's- hey, where are you going?"
"I'll be back in some time. Till then, maybe you should think about how serious you are about us."
The door slammed behind her but you were still processing her statement.
How did Wanda think you're not serious enough? Is that why she was so worked up about this?
Oh god...
You started cleaning up your apartment, just to busy yourself and not let your mind wander to the hurt you have caused Wanda but it was hard not to. Causing her pain was the last thing you wanted to do and yet here you were.
Usually whenever you two got into a fight it would easily be resolved and even if it was something serious and long lasting, you wouldn't relax until you figured out how to fix the problem.
This time, however, you knew there was only one way how but you weren't sure you were brave enough to walk down that path.
You had to, though, for Wanda if not for yourself.
Taking in a deep breath, you started to call your mother.
"Hi, honey. It's so good to hear from you. You rarely ever call. How are you?"
"I am good, mom. I was wondering if you and dad were free tonight? It's been really long and I wanted to talk to you guys about something."
"Of course, love. Is everything okay?"
"Yes, mom. Everything is fine." You tried to sound cheerful and reassuring though your nerves were already setting in, your hands shaking and sweating.
"Alright, dear. See you tonight then."
"See you."
+
Wanda came home that night - very late - to the sound of sobbing.
She immediately started towards your shared bedroom, only to find herself in a room full of scattered items, most of them being your childhood stuff.
You were sat on the floor next to the bed, clutching a pink and purple bracelet in your iron tight grip.
"Baby?" She whispered, her anger completely forgotten at the sheer sadness in your cries.
You turned towards her, sobbing harder at the reminder of the hurt you had caused her. "I am so sorry." You said. And then repeated it over and over.
"What's wrong?" She carefully maneuvered her way to you, engulfing you in her arms as soon as you werein reach. "Hey!" She held your cheek, lifting it so you were looking at her. "It's okay. Whatever it is, it'll be okay." And with that, she pressed your head to her chest, letting you feel her steady heartbeat and her kisses to your hair.
Wanda could use her powers, find out what's bothering you so much and fix it but something told her this should come from you. So she waited, ready to wait for however long you needed.
"It's okay, baby. I'm here."
"I never meant to hurt you." You mumbled after a while. "I was just so scared of their reaction." Your lips trembled again, visions of the dinner passing through your brain. Their disapproving glance at each other was enough of an answer to you even before their rejection had left their mouth.
"It's okay, I am not going anywhere if that's what you're worried about."
You bundled her shirt in your hand, inhaling deeply and looking at her.
"I came out to them." You said in a small and broken voice. Wanda knew instantly what was wrong.
"Oh, (Y/N)." She hugged you closer, impossibly tight and unrelenting.
She didn't want to let go. Ever. Infact, she wanted to protect you from everything cruel. Like your parents, for starters.
"I am so sorry. This is my fault, I rushed you into this."
"No, Wanda. I think I... I always knew it was gonna be this way. I was waiting and hoping for a change but... They were like this long before you."
She nodded, closing her eyes and steadying her emotions so she could be there for you. "Did you eat? Should I make something?"
You shook your head, content on just passing out in her arms. The day had been really wrong and your emotions were draining you.
"Okay. What do you want?"
"Sleep." You mumbled, already drowsy.
She chuckled. Even now, you were still adorable, still beautiful, still perfect.
"Alright, baby. Let's get you to bed." She helped you change your clothes and perform your nightly routine. Putting you under the covers, she soon joined you.
She opened her arms and you fell into them, desperately trying to forget their hostile gazes.
"I love you." You told her.
She rubbed your back, kissing your forehead lightly, moving her lips to your nose and, finally, your lips. "I love you so much. I am so proud of you."
"You are?"
"Of course. You're my strong girl."
You giggled, warmth spreading in your chest at her words.
"It's late, though. You should sleep. I'll be here with you the whole time, okay?"
You nodded, closing your eyes and sighing in contentment.
Apparently, their rejection didn't mean much when you were in her arms.
And maybe, just maybe, she had a visit to make to them tomorrow too. Just for a small piece of her mind.
here it is... tell me what you think! can you find out the smol Destiel reference that I added? thank you so much for reading!!
taglist is open now!
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fangurlingismyforte · 11 days ago
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fangurlingismyforte · 13 days ago
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Fandom content sometimes doesn’t have to be for the fandom, it could be for yourself. Making for yourself is the best part of fandom life sometimes.
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fangurlingismyforte · 13 days ago
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Even a Jedi needs a break.
Summary: Obi Wan has been overworking himself, and the reader notices this and the tiredness he has and decides to do something about it.
Warnings: None, just fluff.
Pairing: Obi Wan Kenobi x Female!Reader
Words Count: 1.1k Words
A/N: I hope you enjoy it, loves!
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Gif by @simply-ellas-stuff
What time was it? Obi Wan had no idea. He has been at his desk in his and her wife’s apartment, filling report after report about his and the 212th last few missions, for hours. Exhaustion was causing his eyes to unfocus even with his glasses on, but he didn’t care, he had to push past exhaustion and finish these reports so he could have the rest of the week to spend with his wife.
As Obi Wan typed, he heard a knock on the office’s open door but he didn’t look up from the datapad he was typing on. His eyes narrowed slightly as his head began to throb and his eyes burned. 
Keep reading
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fangurlingismyforte · 17 days ago
CHOLE BHATURE ALWAYS
Chole bhature >>>> pav bhaji
*deep breath* ok let's get ready for chaos
I'm neutral. Desiblr, opinions?
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