Vampires when they sip on your blood and catch extra strength Tylenol, at least two psychiatric meds, two cups of coffee, weed, and microplastics
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'These are our cousins from alaska'
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what’s more unsettling - a wolf crying “a tear the size of a baseball” or edward calling jacob “son” ??
the answer is both. smeyer what the actual fuck
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I take pride in being a girl that Edward would hate. Nothing beats knowing he would be disgusted by my mind
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I headcanon Bella as fat and Edward as a short king.
Bella is fat, because fat women deserve to have a vampire obsessed with them and caring for them and protecting them. He can pick her up and run with her on his back no matter her size, because he’s a vampire and could juggle semi trucks if he wanted to. Fat women deserve to be carried around and held too. Plus it just feels so natural for her character. It’s the vibe.
Edward is short because I said so.
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Children of the Moon
Sources
The Twilight Guide
Breaking Dawn
Basically needed an online record of the Children of the Moon, aka the twilight werewolves that are closer tot he traditional sort of werewolf portrayed in media.
Inspired by @panlight ‘s answer to an ask HERE , here is a list of what the un-shown werewolves (non-Quileute) in Twilight are like:
they change by the full moon only and when they change they look half human, half wolf
they cannot control any of their urges when they are in their furry state—>they are “feral”
they are as strong and fast as vampires
they have more powerful forelegs than hind legs, making them more ape-like than canine
they are immune to vampire venom (both the pain-inducement and the transformative element)
they reproduce themselves through a bite, like vampires do–they can’t reproduce sexually, so they don’t pass down their state through sex
they travel either alone or with one other werewolf that is of a different sex than themselves
they have been hunted down to near extinction by the Volturi because of their strength
Actual Passage in the Guide
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AYO I JUST HAD A HORRIBLE IDEA
jack black as charlie
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Y'all realize the only character in all of Twilight and Midnight Sun implied to be Hispanic is the man who tries to rape Bella? She describes his skin specifically as darker, and his full name is Orlando Calderas Wallace.
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Why did SM make the Cullens so wasteful I mean, driving super fast sports cars, Alice throwing out entire wardrobes regularly, buying and making an entire restaurants worth of food for one human, getting new shit all the time, traveling via plane to other continents when they can run and swim faster than almost all living animals, wasting all that time playing the stock market when they’re already so rich they’ll be fine until the earth implodes, and devouring endless animals in very delicate ecosystems rather than like buying a cow every once in a while. Like they are the epitome of wasteful wealth hoarding BS and I hate it
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how to trick writers into giving you more fanfic to read
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Bella deserved to get drunk at least once before turning into a vampire
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Edward honestly doesn't know how to cope with how gorgeous his wife is
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Damn why did they not include bella’s cute lil job in the movies. They ROBBED US so hard. I need a tv series for them to get EVERY FUCKING DETAIL
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it’s so fucking insane when ppl r like “still a better love story than twilight.” Bc twilight is the most romantic and fucked up thing I’ve ever loved and the only thing I’ll ever be so obsessed with and that HAS to count for something so..
I
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When I was a kid my favorite authors were J.K. Rowling and Stephanie Meyer and now that I'm an adult I would physically fight both of them in the street.
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