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i am emotional today
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Every November
There’s a room in my heart
That I always visit
An empty and abandoned room
No memories can be found
No old songs to listen to
It’s only your shadow
That I can’t recognize anymore
Because of the years that passed
I mourned when I realized
You’re there but not here.
-C.E.
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00:00
Cold floor
Unused utensils
Folded blankets
Soaked pillows
Another year has gone,
In a strange country
Far away from you
How long till I feel at home?
CE
Homesick
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This Christmas I just wanna wear my pj’s sip hot chocolate and watch old movies with you.
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Life is stuck on pause
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15:31
Sometimes I wonder how can my heart cling closely to people, places and things I know for sure I can’t keep, go and have.
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46 days before Christmas
Cold breeze brush over my skin
Still staying at this foreign and strange place
Could I stay any longer?
How much longer till I see you, my home?
CE
feelinghomesick
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It hits me every night
darkness is my blanket
tears soaked in my pillows
loneliness sleeps beside me
-CE
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Do you get sad suddenly and your chest starts hurting and it takes all of your energy to move even slightly ?
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Now I’m empty. I have nothing to give to anyone. Except for talking about my pain. And since I realize that’s toxic, I’ve simply isolated.
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Dear diary...
Every day feels like a battle against myself.
A battle I always end up losing.
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I am afraid of myself and what I am capable of.
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Long walks
Interlocked hands
Small talks
Take me back
To where everything is real
Wake me up from this blurred dream
Take me back
To where everything is simple
Let me sleep next to the field of daisies
~CE
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We have nursed ourselves so much. Have cradled our insecurities. We have rejected criticisms. We have drunk milk of positivity and have spitted negativity. We have been intoxicated with praise insomuch our glass outpouring. We hushed ourselves to sleep with lullabies of lies. We become stagnant. We stopped growing. We have become a little child in an adult’s body.
C. E.
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