diazactually

[diazactually]

i know we've all seen it fifty times by now but buck's face journey throughout that entire scene with eddie is just so. SOOOOOOO.

this face as eddie says "hang out with the boys" (right after he's done talking about god! btw)

"when you and marisol ran into me and tommy...we were on a date."

"really?" "mhm."

you can physically watch the trepidation melt off his face. he hesitated for a bit, thought hard about it for a second, but you can pinpoint the exact moment he lets go. he said it, it's out there, eddie knows, for better or worse. the way he delivers that little "mhm" is so completely vulnerable, but also final - this is it, i'm learning that this is who i am, and i'm far from knowing all of me but i am certain that this is one part.

then (after eddie made sure to say "not that it would have mattered" if he'd known that tommy was gay), open, easy - "we were on a date. yes."

to which eddie, wide-eyed and a little hesitant, says "okay", and buck replies: "is that....weird?"

and he's clearly ready to talk about it, to talk through any weirdness that might be there, because tommy being queer and buck being queer are not the same thing to eddie when buck is sitting right there and has been his best friend for five years, but then eddie says "no, absolutely not":

"this doesn't change a thing between us. okay?"

and buck is so obviously touched and grateful it makes me want to cry a little bit but THEN he tells eddie that tommy already "dumped" him - so if this, in theory, was something eddie was uncomfortable with deep down, he wouldn't really have to deal with it anyway - and eddie goes out of his way to encourage buck to pick the thread back up again.

the half-smile of "i kinda can't stop thinking about him"...

into "you should call him." / "really?"

and i guess what i'm trying to say is that i'm simply so emotional about buck deciding that he was going to say something on a little bit of a whim, and being nervous but not afraid, because this is eddie, who has his back no matter what. eddie, who wasn't ever going to be anything other than supportive, or at least that's what buck tried to tell himself over and over in those few moments before he decided to say something, but it doesn't matter how sure you are of the other person's reaction - coming out to another human being is always some degree of completely nervewracking, especially if you're as new to knowing this part of you as buck is.

but he did it. and eddie did exactly what buck, in his heart of hearts, knew he was going to do: accepted him. reminded him that he's supported and, most importantly, loved. made sure that he felt it.

just look at this happy little face as eddie's on his way out, right after a huge exhale:

every single day oliver stark makes choices. and we just have to live with them

#reblogging on company hours #you don't understand how much that 'mhm' means to me #oliver stark the man you are #911

[diazactually]

yes this ask is shamelessly just to see the two icons near each other 😌

so valid, i was considering doing the same😌

look at us gooo💕 matchy matchy 💕

#sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

unfortunately that is the closest gif I could find to secret agents on a secret mission, the tumblr gif search is A MESS, but also now I am committed to this 😌😌😌

i love the fact that it's an abc show at that😂😂

but yes, indeed 🥷

#sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

I SEE YOU IN MY NOTES INSTEAD OF WASHING YOUR HAIR MA'AM xDDDDD

i'll have you know i already finished it, I WAS RUSHING BACK TO YOU

#sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

ARAH, YOU'RE ALIVE!

i'm incognito.

i'm lurking.

#jess💕💕💕

[diazactually]

loooooove youuuu <3

i love you to the core 🔥

#sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

for @diazactually, because I love youuu 💕 part i | part ii

‘I watch him in the kitchen. I think of how much it hurts to love somebody. How deep the hurt is, how almost unbearable. It’s not the love that hurts; it’s the possibility of anything happening to the object of your love.’       Augusten Burroughs || Magical Thinking

[image description in alt text]

#what do you mean for me😭❤️ #insert jennifer lawrence meme of what do you.. what do you MEAN #i love you too🥺❤️❤️ #my partner in angst🤺 #this is so lovely. as always you never ever disappoint. you always deliver #he loves him to the core. SCREAM IT LOUDER IN THE BACK #thank you❤️❤️ #i shall pin it to my profile in place of the part 1 #because even if i'm inactive in fandom now i will always come back if it's you wrecking emotional havoc with your genius❤️ #buddie #911 #sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

Gonna be petty for a second: there's a poll that 911 is losing right now because no one has seen it so here's the article (you gotta scroll down to find it). Vote 911!

[diazactually]

listen to you breathing (is where I wanna be)

Or the one where Buck is presumed dead after a building collapse and Eddie has to live through the reminder that tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone

read on ao3 (warnings for presumed major character death, grief/mourning and major character injury)

The thing is – and Eddie should have known this, has been taught this cruel lesson over and over and over again – the thing is most of the time the worst day of your life will start like just any other day.

A million small moments, so familiar and mundane you almost don’t even notice them slipping by - until you would give anything to go back and get just one more.

(You can’t.)

This one technically starts with a call to a small pile-up accident at 11.47 the day before, which drags on so they only fall into their bunks sometime around 2am. But since they catch over 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep afterwards, it kind of doesn’t count.

So instead the day starts with the bell blessedly only going off again at 6.14 and Eddie blearily opening his eyes to a cup of coffee on the pillow next to him, almost completely obscuring Buck’s wide smile right behind it. There is a pillow crease all the way down his cheek that is visible though and Eddie barely catches himself before reaching out to smooth his finger along the promise of warm skin right there.

Instead he wraps both hands around the coffee cup - just to be safe, he does actually know how to control himself most of the time - and takes a deep gulp in the hopes it will wake not just him but also his restraint. He is up and already halfway to the door, before he turns back to raise an eyebrow at Buck.

“Wait, how did you know there was gonna be a call before the bell even went and woke everyone?”

“I didn’t,” Buck snorts. “I’ve been awake for like 20 minutes and I figured that something like this was gonna happen before too long.” He shrugs, ducks his head and something in Eddie’s chest goes warm and weightless. “The coffee isn’t super fresh anymore, but better than no coffee, right?”

Keep reading

#just remembered this after our little crying friend talk #people this fic is like. have you never had your heart broken in to tiny little pieces WELL LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO- #it is happy ending tho🤲 #sarah is a softie so she would never dare #also i know where she lives so she would never dare 2x #buddie fic #the 'my emotional stability? did not need it anyway' fic #sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

making edits/writing fanfic for your friends that you know will make them cry a little bit actually is a love language 🤭

#it's me. i'm crying friend #SARAH💀💀💀 #sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

arah i miss you 🥺 and i love you 💖 here's an actual literal totally legit photo of me writing this love letter

katieee🥺❤️

miss you too! love you❤️

it's been a long while, here's me reading this ask

#darlingdiaz #❤️❤️

[diazactually]

for @diazactually​, welcome back love 💕💕💕

‘I watch him in the kitchen. I think of how much it hurts to love somebody. How deep the hurt is, how almost unbearable. It’s not the love that hurts; it’s the possibility of anything happening to the object of your love.’                 Augusten Burroughs || Magical Thinking

[image description in alt text]

#sarah i love you💖💘💝💕💗💞💓 #this will be pinned on my blog as the totem for this slow transition back haha #it's so beautiful i love it so much #you delivered the pain as always. definitely did not disappoint #but it's always mutual hahaha #you're welcome for those quotes #love is indeed stored in the kitchen #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie #911 #things i'm tagged in💛 #sarah🤭🤺

[diazactually]

cast • group photo from 5x18!

#they give me so much serotonin it's unreal #this show owns me and my entire mental healing journey istg #look at these beautiful incredible amazing breath-taking gorgeous remarkable people #911 #911 spoilers

[diazactually]

buck & karen — running to their spouses in the hospital <3

[Image Description: 4 rectangular gifs from 9-1-1. The first two gifs are from season 4, episode 14. The last two gifs are from season 5, episode 17. Gif 1: A shot of Buck running through the hospital, slowing down as he reaches Eddie’s room and coming to a stop as he pulls off his mask and gazes at Eddie, breathing heavily. Gif 2: The shot shifts to Eddie, lying in his hospital bed as the camera zooms in on his smiling face as he greets Buck. The shot goes back to Buck, who gazes back, and a huge, relieved smile appears on his face. Gif 3: A shot of Karen running into the emergency room, her hands waving out, as she looks distressed and worried. She reaches Hen, off screen, and immediately hugs her. Gif 4: Hen pulls Karen close and cups the back of her head, smiling happily, reassuring her that she’s okay, softly. /End ID]

#literally going insane #THEY ARE HUSBANDS #evan buckley #eddie diaz #hen wilson #karen wilson #911 #911 spoilers #things i'm tagged in💛

[diazactually]

🧑🏻‍🚒 vs 🦖

#reblogging this scene in every single form i encounter it on my dash #LOOK AT HIM #evan buckley #911 #911 spoilers

[diazactually]

Just my dad, okay?

#these dorks #also i cannot help but think about how yes ramon was obviously the core of eddie's repressed mindset but helena's role was not #insignificant either #i mean 'don't drag him down with you' ? #not exactly A+ parenting now is it? #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911 #911 spoilers

[diazactually]

Eddie Begins | Hero Complex

#his growth omggggg #i love this show freaking much #eddie diaz #911 #911 spoilers