deansb1tch

[deansb1tch]

*Remus and Sirius are cuddling in the dorm*

James: 🎶 Moony and Padfoot, are sitting on a tree 🎶

#they were gay #wolfstar #the marauders #marauders #remus x sirius #remus lupin #sirius black

[deansb1tch]

Lily: well and how is your better half doin'?

Remus: oh, he's actually fine

Sirius: *jumping from a chair* I am Batman

#wolfstar hc #wolfstar #remus loves sirius #remus lupin #sirius being sirius #gay sirius #sirius x lupin

[deansb1tch]

Merlin: I don't want a "Romeo and Juliet" lovestory, I want a fairytale lovestory where everyone lives their happily ever after

Arthur: so you want me to save you but under the condition that I have to die everytime I try it?

Merlin: I just want an easy and calm lovestory

#they were gay #merlin #merlin x arthur #merthur #arthur pendragon #bbc merlin #bbc merthur

[deansb1tch]

Arthur: *cutting in his finger* FUCK ME!

Merlin: *at the other end of the room* As you wish Sire

#they were gay #merlin #merlin x arthur #merthur #arthur pendragon #bbc merlin #bbc merthur

[deansb1tch]

Gwen: fuck Arthur

Merlin: Yes, fuck Arthur

*the next day*

Merlin: Hey, guess who I've hooked up last night?

Gwen: Who?

Merlin: Arthur Pendragon

Gwen: Arthur- REALLY MERLIN?????

#they were gay #merlin #merlin x arthur #merthur #arthur pendragon #bbc merlin

[deansb1tch]

merlin: we have a problem

arthur: no, YOU have a problem. i have an idiot who keeps making them

[deansb1tch]

Gwain: what's your type?

Merlin: Sexy, blond, funny, brave-

Gwain: Just say "Arthur"

#bbc merlin #bbc merthur #merlin x arthur #merthur #sir gwaine #merlin

[deansb1tch]

Arthur: is anyone else finished with-

Gwen: acting like I've forgiven Uther the whole sorcerer thing with my father?

Morgana: pretending that I like Uther and that I don't wanna kill him everytime I see his face and that I am a sorcerer?

Merlin: keeping secrets ,for example being a sorcerer and being in love with the prince, from everyone in this room and trying not to die because of them?

Arthur: -finished with the meal, god what is wrong with you people. Wait Merlin, you love me????

#arthur pendragon #merlin #merlin x arthur #merthur #morgana #morgana pendragon #gwenevere #bbc merlin #bbc merthur

[deansb1tch]

Achilles: do you love me?

Patroclus: honey, how often do I have to say it again? We are married, of course I love you

Achilles: I wasn't sure if you married me because you don't wanna hurt my feelings or something like that...

Patroclus: please mighty gods help me

#patrochilles #they were gay #patroclus x achilles #the song of achilles #tsoa achilles

[deansb1tch]

Merlin: I am not going to save Arthur anymore. He can die, it's getting ridiculous. Every single day he's about to die and do I get any credit for saving him? NO

Arthur: *gets poisoned*

Merlin: well anyways sooo

#they were gay #merlin #merlin x arthur #merthur #arthur pendragon #bbc merthur #bbc merlin

[deansb1tch]

Arthur: How do I tell my crush that I love them?

Merlin: *thinks he's talking about Gwen* Buy flowers, be kind and maybe make her breakfast. Maybe invite her to a romantic picking

*the next day*

Arthur: *knelling before Merlin with flowers in his hand* Do you wanna go picnicking with me?

Merlin: *eating his breakfast* this is exactly how you tell your crush that you like her

Arthur: Merlin, I love you

Merlin: right words my lord- Oh wait... Really?

Arthur: you are more an idiot than I've expected

Merlin: the king loves me

#merthur #merlin x arthur #merlin #arthur pendragon

[deansb1tch]

#husbands Brian Tyree Henry as Phastos and Haaz Sleiman as Ben Stoss in ETERNALS (2021)

[deansb1tch]

Achilles: I am not gay!

Odysseus: you are dating Patroclus since 10 years...

Achilles: I am not gay. I am gay gay

#patrochilles #patroclus x achilles #the song of achilles #they were gay #tsoa achilles

[deansb1tch]

WHEN THEY ARE GONE, he slumps next to me, his face against my belly. My skin grows slippery under the steady fall of his tears.

The next day he carries me to the pyre. Briseis and the Myrmidons watch as he places me on the wood and strikes the flint. The flames surround me, and I feel myself slipping further from life, thinning to only the faintest shiver in the air. I yearn for the darkness and silence of the underworld, where I can rest.

He collects my ashes himself, though this is a woman’s duty. He puts them in a golden urn, the finest in our camp, and turns to the watching Greeks.

“When I am dead, I charge you to mingle our ashes and bury us together.”

- The Song of Achilles

[deansb1tch]

Odysseus: Achilles, Agamemnon is very angry at you. He'll come at you now!

Achilles: he is not the first man I made come.

Patroclus: Honey, please. Stop.

#tsoa achilles #tsoa patroclus #patroclus x achilles #patrochilles

[deansb1tch]

Modern world: *making Achilles and Patroclus buddies*

Old Greece: *arguing about Achilles' and Patroclus' sexuality and their relationship*

Platon: listen you little shits. Achilles was a bottom and this isn't debateable! Welcome to my TedTalk

#patroclus x achilles #patrochilles #tsoa achilles #the song of achilles #they were gay

[deansb1tch]

Am I the only one who thinks that Merlin and Arthur are just like Achilles and Patroclus but just in different time periods?

#merthur #patrochilles #merlin x arthur #patroclus x achilles