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Dear Dawn Richards
I want to send you this so you can understand how I feel. I wanted you to know how serious I wanted to take things to the next level. To put all the childish antics to rest. I want to prove your friends wrong. Me and your grandmother talk sometimes. I told her that I failed her. And she encourages me that I didn’t fail I just fucked up. She still believes in me that has to mean something right? If it wasn’t for the bad, you can’t deny our chemistry and personalities match extremely well. That is why I was so drawn to you. I love you to the end of days. If you give me the chance I’ll let everyone know that. I am yours and you are mine
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I will always be proud of you and your accomplishments you deserve everything coming to you
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Never been in love like this before. I’m sorry, your heart is delicate flower that I want to cherish to the end of days
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Dear Dawn Richards pt 2
Idk if you will ever find these letters, But these help me figure out my emotions. Do you honestly hate me? I was a bad companion, not a bad person. Emotionally I cheated on you and lied about about it. When I first about to lose you I felt I lost a part of me. Over time I start started to see things differently and was important to me. It was like a whole pathway showed up. I saw things more differently an started change habits about myself instantly. I wanted to show you that you were my first priority. I wanted show than I can be the man you saw in me, the pain was too great and you me saw for who I used to be. If I moved back a couple months back would things have been different? You think we would have a solid shot? We had soo much potential together. I honestly saw us going over your grandparents house with our kids and having a cookout. You learning from my mom how to braid our kids hair lol. My mom was another deal breaker. At the end she was opened to meeting you and getting to know you. I cried to her over an hour when you told me we was no more. It doesn’t feel real. I wish I spoke this freely to you about my feelings. I wanted to change your thoughts about me. Maybe time and space will help. Idk. When I came to visit you I should have just stayed not went back. I’m not the man I once was I hope one day you see that
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If you read this whole thing I want to say thank you
Dear Dawn Richards,
Words can’t describe how I feel rn. I wanted everything to work out between us. I think it’s time to be completely honest with you and myself. Our relationship was built on a lie. A lie that I shouldn’t have kept from you. A lie that drew us apart. Something I should have taken care of before our relationship has even started. I truly believe if we met 5 years later things would be so much different, but hey who knows it might just be wishful thinking. Over time, I fell in love with Texas, the culture, and I fell deeply in love with you without even knowing. I didn’t come out there to have a relationship. Especially at the time I wasn’t ready for one, but I had fall in love you. It fucked my head up so much that I tried so hard not to fall in love but I did anyways. I was afraid of getting hear broken, but instead I ended up breaking yours. After spending two years with you, I moved back home because I thought I had no other choices. Knowing that now it was a huge mistake that I wish could change. I fell back into old habits and falling back into a deep depression. Our relationship was on its last leg, I wanted stop all the bullshit and focus on what’s important which was getting to you and starting my life depression free.shit got ruined. My ex flat out lied on me to you. At this point I was out of chances. I brought every proof in the world that she lied and it wasn’t enough for you. You couldn’t take it anymore and you let your emotions take over. This was one thing that also held me back was your emotions. When you let them take over the worst comes out of you. I took majority of the blame because I felt it was my fault you were like this. It was constant pattern I wanted to break it. The things you would say made me second guess myself not only as a lover but a human being. There was a brief moment of time where I thought about even killing myself. I felt like you never heard me out because true reality is you thought the world revolved around you and you couldn’t make no mistakes in your words or actions. Saying that, my insecure ass flirt would with other females. You wanted to love without giving anything just taking but after year I slowly started to change you. I’m not asking for an apology, I’m expressing the emotions I kept inside. I wanted to prove you that I was a changed man, you tried your best find every negative thing to not trust means stick to it which fucking hurt me deep. Again I couldn’t blame you. It was too late. If I had one chance to move out there and be with you. I would drop what I’m doing and do it. And it could be for Anything. I won’t be able to love anyone like this again. And losing you is one regret I’ll have to live with forever. I will cherish the memories and lessons I had with you. You were my everything from the start I hope you know that. I will pray one day we can make back each other even as friends I love you
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