Tumgik
Text
Nina: Kaz, we need to talk?
Kaz: Are you going to kill me?
Nina: What? No the opposite actually.
Kaz: … I’m going to kill you?
258 notes · View notes
Text
Jesper: It’s time for plan B.
Nina: We have a plan B?
Jesper: No, but it’s time for one.
93 notes · View notes
Text
Wylan, Jesper and Inej at a party:
Person: Oh what a pretty lady.
Inej: …thanks
Person: So which one of you gentlemen is third wheeling?
Inej: That’d be the the pretty lady.
99 notes · View notes
Text
Colhm: We call that a traumatic event.
Colhm, turning to Jesper: Not a “bro moment”
Colhm, turning to Nina: Not a “major L”
Colhm, turning to Kaz: And not an “oof lmao”
213 notes · View notes
Text
The crows on Halloween: Jesper, what’s your costume supposed to be?
Jesper: What costume?
Nina: It’s Halloween, who are you portraying covered in blood?
Tumblr media
Nina: Oh, Kaz is that your costume too?
Kaz: No. Somebody pissed me off outside the the crow club.
81 notes · View notes
Text
Matthias: Djel give me patience.
Jesper: Don’t you mean, Djel give me strength?
Matthias: If Djel gave me strength, you’d be dead.
94 notes · View notes
Text
Nina: Scenario. You find a guy running cons on Dregs turf, you go to confront him and you find out he’s your brother. How do you handle the situation?
Kaz: Well first of all I’d be like…
Kaz: …Jordie? You’re alive?
Kaz: What the hell?
107 notes · View notes
Text
Nina: Are you ever gonna stop with the “I want to die” crap?
Kaz: I’ll stop when I’m dead, that’s for sure.
97 notes · View notes
Text
Kaz: My New Years resolution is to commit at least 20 felonies this year.
Jesper: Don’t you mean next year?
Kaz: No.
Jesper: But it’s New Year’s Eve, we only have hours left of this year.
Kaz: *straightens his tie and grabs his cane* Challenge accepted.
133 notes · View notes
Text
Kaz: Inej made me feel things.
Jesper: What things?
Kaz: Feelings.
Jesper: She made you feel feelings?
Kaz: Yeah.
Jesper: Bout’ time.
127 notes · View notes
Text
Wylan: I’ve decided to put on a play of my life thus far, Jesper will be playing the role of my father.
Jesper: I don’t want to be your father.
Wylan: Perfect! You already know your—
Jesper: *whispers* I want to be your daddy.
Wylan: *chokes*
98 notes · View notes
Text
Nina: If you only had one day left to live, what would you do?
Matthias: Say goodbye to those I love.
Jesper: Something illegal.
Inej: Go quietly to meet my saints.
Kaz: I would message ten people, saying that if they didn’t forward the message to ten other people, I would die tomorrow.
Nina: Saints, Kaz… that’s—
Jesper: Brilliant! Can I change my answer?
144 notes · View notes
Text
Wylan and Jesper: Can we go get waffles?
Nina: What did Matthias say?
Wylan: He said no.
Nina: Then why would I do it?
Jesper: Because he’s not the boss of you.
Nina: You’re damn right he isn’t! Let’s go for waffles!
151 notes · View notes
Text
Wylan: Are you flirting with me?
Jesper: Are you sitting on my lap?
Wylan: Stop changing the subject.
107 notes · View notes
Text
I’m doing this for my brother, It’s what he would have wanted.
- Kaz as he does the exact opposite of what Jordie would have wanted.
68 notes · View notes
Text
Inej: Murder wasn’t on today’s agenda.
Matthias: Murder isn’t on anyone’s agenda.
Kaz: No it’s on mine, just not until next Thursday.
247 notes · View notes
Text
*Jesper and Wylan sitting in jail*
Jesper: “Who should we call?”
Wylan: “I’d call Kaz, but I feel safer in jail.”
121 notes · View notes