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ben-c-group-therapy · 42 minutes
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Crisis Hotline Text: HOME to 741741
*for those that feel more comfortable texting over talking*
dont ever hesitate. reblog this.
Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743
Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253
Trans LifeLine: 1-877-565-8860
Human Trafficking Hotline: 1-888-373-7888
Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233
BDSM Partner Abuse Hotline: 617-742-4911
Substance Abuse Helpline: (800) 784-6776
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ben-c-group-therapy · 4 hours
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reblog this if your blog is a safe space on april fools and won’t have any jumpers, screamers, or anything scary or anxiety inducing
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ben-c-group-therapy · 16 hours
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Scotty Valens tries tracking down an asshole who assaulted his mother, Rosa Valens, and Belen Hernandez, along with purse snatching at a local market.
Cold Case S7:E13 ‘Bombers’
Part 1 Part 2
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ben-c-group-therapy · 16 hours
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Scotty Valens tries tracking down an asshole who assaulted his mother, Rosa Valens, and Belen Hernandez, along with purse snatching at a local market.
Cold Case S7:E13 ‘Bombers’
Part 1 Part 2
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ben-c-group-therapy · 16 hours
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Mayans M.C S2:E10 ‘Hunahpu’
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ben-c-group-therapy · 16 hours
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AN: This fic is purely self-indulgent! I needed it at this time Sorry for my grammar and poorly written story. It was off the cuff.
TW’s: If any of the following are likely or even remotely possible to trigger you PLEASE DO NOT READ BELOW! Depression; Mania; Manic Depressive; Bipolar disorder; Self Harm Scars; Self Harm Thoughts; Suicidal Thoughts; Mental Illness.
WC: 1,808
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“Have you ever felt so alone even when you’re surrounded by people?” You looked up at Nick, thick tears gathering in your eyes at the admission of how you were handling life and all its highs and lows currently.
Nick felt his heart break as he looked down at you, curled up on your oversized comfy sofa. As he had come into the apartment an hour ago after not hearing from you all day and not seeing you at work, he noticed your place was eerily quiet save for a few sniffles coming from the living room. The place seemed almost untouched, with no dishes in the sink, no drinking glasses anywhere, or the water bottle you carried around faithfully. The only place that seemed lived in at all was the living room, where it appeared you had camped out the last couple of days at least. A blanket tossed haphazardly over the back of the couch, takeout boxes on the coffee table, and a couple of plastic water bottles on the floor. It was very apparent to Nick you weren’t feeling well mentally and in a dark place.
Nick exhaled a shaky breath before taking a tentative seat on the sofa beside you. He knew you well enough to know that when in a state like this you wanted your space but you needed him close by too.
“Yeah…yeah Hermosa I have.” He sighed. “I don’t know how you’re currently feeling or what you’re dealing with baby but I’ve felt that way. Tell me what’s going on in that beautiful mind of yours.” The handsome hazelnut-eyed detective let his hand reach out towards you, holding it over your thigh. “When did you first start feeling this way? Hmm?” He spoke softly, his voice full of concern.
“I don’t know. Everything just snowballed.” You sniffled and looked up to the ceiling as tears welled even further in your eyes while you tried not to cry openly, always wanting to remain strong on the outside for everyone else. Nick though…Nick saw right through it all. He always had and always would and as he did he pulled you to him, into his chest as he wrapped his arms around you; his large hand on your head soothing down your hair before pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.
Nick had been in your life for nearly five years now, at first only a partner at work but now your boyfriend for nearly a year after you both confessed your feelings after an argument after a frustrating week and a huge disagreement. You had yelled at him your feelings and he stared at you dumbfounded, never believing anything so good could happen to him, so good as to have you have the same feelings he felt for you, that is. That was Nick though, Nick Amaro who never thought he deserved the best in life which you always felt he did, knew he did. Then again you felt the same way toward yourself. Never believing you deserved anything good or anyone good in your life and that anything or anyone good had to have an alterer motive. Perhaps that’s why you were kindred spirits, you both knew how the other felt in some similar sort of way all the while knowing it was completely different sets of situations that led you to the place you were in life now.
Nick looked over to the table behind the couch seeing your medicine containers filled still from the last week. You hadn’t taken them then, a reckless decision in a moment of mania or brain fog, maybe both, he couldn’t be sure until asking further. While at work the detective was one of the best at interrogations he was careful when it came to you, he knew you hated feeling like you were being interrogated like one of his perps. It always ended up in you pulling even further away and shutting everyone, including him, out. “You didn't take your meds this week?” He questioned softly as he caressed your hair and back.
“I don’t know. I can’t remember when.” You muttered.
“Baby…you had an alarm set. What happened? I wanted to be here but I was undercover. I’m so sorry mi amor. I can’t always be here to remind you, you know that right? I worry. You have to take your meds so you feel better; so you feel okay.” Nick urged, feeling himself worry even more now at your words.
“Nick…Nick I don’t need you to babysit me. I know what I did was reckless. I know I skipped. One day I got up late, and I missed my alarm, and cut it off. The next day I said I didn’t have time, so I skipped it. The next, the same. The following I forgot, the same with the next and the next, and then I got to the point where I felt amazing I didn’t need it I thought. I was stupid and things spiraled. It felt great for a while! Boy did it feel fucking great. Now…now I just feel empty, and alone. Alone when I’m at work. Alone here. Alone with you. It doesn’t matter, I’m alone.” You started to feel yourself get carried away trying to explain what your mind felt like right now.
The detective listened, his heart clutching at your words and the pain and conflicting thoughts you had to be having right now.
“It’s not normal and it’s not okay. I just. I want to feel okay. I don’t want to have to live life on meds and still battle my thoughts, my mind saying awful things. I’m filled with rage and with hate and I’m not…I’m not hateful, I’m not vengeful, I’m not like this Nick. You know I’m not! I’m empathetic, I’m kind, I feel other people’s emotions and pain so deep inside myself that I carry it wherever I go and I try to make it better. I’m not this person my mind makes me believe I am.” You pushed off of Nick’s chest, or tried I should say but he held you tight to him knowing in a moment you’d break, the flood of tears would form and you’d not be able to stop it. Knowing you you probably hadn’t cried in a long time and needed it. Needed to feel healthy and not with the methods you used to use. Nick’s mind flashed with the memories of new scratches and new cuts and new bruises before you and he had gotten together and you had started an intensive therapy course and continued with therapy and treatment since. You had relapses of course but it hadn’t been as frequent and he had made it his life mission that no one, not even yourself, would harm you again. The squad and so many others, including yourself told him that it wasn’t his fault if you had faltered or slipped again, that it wasn’t his duty to make sure you were okay 24/7 but he still took it seriously and it made you feel even more guilty you had hurt him so bad by hurting yourself.
“Baby… Hermosa, you…you haven’t hurt yourself again have you?” He was afraid to ask…afraid of what the answer might be. He had been gone away without contact all week and had no idea if you were okay or not even if you assured him you were a big girl. Even the squad had said they’d check on you, which they did until you stopped letting anyone in yesterday morning.
“No…no, I haven’t. I’ve had thoughts but I haven’t.” You choked up and the man looked over your hands that had clutched his shirt desperately then down to your wrists and arms seeing no signs of new red angry skin. “It’s like a fucked up addiction. I did it to feel. I did it to make sure I was alive and all the while forget that I was and attempt not to have to deal with it at all anymore. I hate it. I hate I started it but I did now I have to live with it all because I started and my fucked up bipolar.” You cried.
“How…how can you even stand me?? Why do you want to be with me? Why? I’m so fucked up Nick! I’m screwed up! Why would YOU want ME? Me of all the women you could have, you chose the girl with a brain so messed up as mine.” You broke down as the handsome raven-haired detective held you tighter, tears gathering in his own eyes as you soaked his shirt with your own.
“Because I’ve never seen someone so compassionate. Someone so filled with life when you’re interested in something you can’t stop talking about it. Your eyes light up, your smile is huge and you can go on for ages until you realize I’m staring at you with my stupid big grin. Because of your smile, your spirit lights up even the darkest of moments, of days, the darkest corners of my mind. When I think of having you as my work partner and my girlfriend I ask how fucking lucky am I to have you by my side to confide in, to hold, and to love. How lucky am I that Zara and Gil have another amazing woman in their life who can teach them compassion for others and empathy and set a good example. Baby love you so much. I know we’re both fucked up but you are the light in the center of my heart that keeps it beating. That keeps me going. I don’t care that you have times when your life feels a mess, mine feels like a shit show most of the time too but when I hold you, or you hold me, I feel I’m sane. I’m okay. I’ll be okay because you’re here now. You’re going to be okay? Alright? I’m here. I’m going to love you through this and beyond. We’ll get you back on track and get you feeling better. I love you, please…try never to forget, even if you do, I’m going to remind you every day for the rest of eternity that you’re loved and cherished not just by me but by family and our squad and friends. Always.” Nick held your face in his large calloused hands gently as he spoke before kissing your tear-stained face and lips. “I love you. Please rest here, okay? When you get up I’ll be right here. We’ll start new. It’s going to be okay. I’ve got you.” He cooed and rocked slowly side to side hoping to soothe you as you cried yourself to sleep knowing Nick was right, he would be there for you and help you till you saw the daylight again.
Author’s Note: Please if you feel hopeless, empty, sad, or alone or are having any thoughts of SH, Suicide, or even just a feeling of helplessness and depression, call or text your local hotline (FOUND HERE). I have used the Crisis text line (text HOME to 741741 in the USA) several times and it helps to have someone to listen when you hate or are anxious about talking on the phone! If not these lines, please friends/family for support or someone who will listen to you. I’m here to speak to you and try to understand even in your darkest time you aren’t alone even if you feel you are. You are enough and you are loved. I love you. ❤️
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ben-c-group-therapy · 16 hours
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Can’t talk about it? …Tumblr
Not accepted? …Tumblr
Kinky shit? …Tumblr
Tumblr is such my safe space.
Bored in public? Tumblr.
High? Tumblr.
Going thru some shit? Tumblr.
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THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN
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Elevated 🤷🏼‍♀️
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Mayans MC ‘Muluc’ S2 E6
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Mark me down as horny and in love with Nick
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Nick Amaro- No Place Left For You To Be Shy 
This is a continuation of A Crowded Bar Question.
This is NSFW!!!  
I’m just going to be honest guys, I'm not sure about this one. I loved the vibe that I put into the previous part. I was so excited about this sex scene, and I had a whole plan for it. I just don’t know if I pulled it or Nick’s character off. And I can’t tell if it’s bad or just not what I wanted it to be... But I spent a few hours writing it so I'm posting it anyway.  
It had been almost two months since the incident in the bar. The mark on your neck had faded away but your memory of the night and Nick Amaro’s touch hadn’t. You had thought about going to him and begging him to make good on his promise. You wanted to experience more of the fire that he had ignited in you. A fire you hadn’t ever felt with your ex. But Nick was right about more than just you being too drunk to consent to sex that night. You were vulnerable after your breakup. You needed some time to process everything and start to heal before you could jump into another man’s bed.  
You have seen Nick several times since that night. You were surprised to find that he acted as if nothing had happened that night at the bar the first time you saw him again at a crime scene. Not that he ignored you either. He was his normal charming self. He had made small talk with you and checked in on how you were doing. It made you question if what you thought had happened that night really had. It was reaffirmed that it did indeed happen when just as you were packing up to leave. Your standard issue crime scene jumper had unzipped and pulled your shirt down leaving the mark on display. Nick’s warm hands had pulled the shirt back into place. He had made full eye contact before giving you a wink and a mischievous smile before leaving to return to his work. 
Things had only been a little different, just enough for you to notice. You didn’t see Nick at every crime scene, you covered any of the various departments in Manhattan. However, when you did, he was just a little flirtier, his charm turned up a notch or two higher than normal. He also always seemed to find a reason to touch you. Nothing that could be considered inappropriate, but a hand on your shoulder or him brushing by just a little too closely. Every time he did it sent fire through your entire body, a shiver up your spine. It was clear that he was being respectful and waiting for you to make up your mind while showing you that he was still willing to fulfill his promise. You also had no doubt that if you told him to stop or even gave him a hint of being uncomfortable, he would stop immediately and without question. 
The urge overtook you like most things did in your life, hitting you all at once and begging you to jump. Nick had offered sex that night at the bar and you wanted it. You didn’t know how it had happened but all at once his soft touches and flirty words sunk into your stomach and exploded into lust. You were doing your job when it happened. He had brushed by you just enough that you felt the heat of his body tease you along with the scent of his aftershave. Something snaps in you and before you can rethink your jump. 
You finish bagging a bloodstained shirt when you call him over, “Detective,” He turns away from the other crewmembers and saunters over to you. It’s nothing out of the ordinary and nobody pays any attention, busy in their late-night work. He stops just a little too close and you turn into him making the amount of space smaller. You hold up the bag in false pretenses and he takes it. You drop your voice when you ask, “You want to make good on your offer?” It’s bold and you think he might ask you to be more direct and tell him exactly what you mean by that.  
He doesn’t. 
It is like a switch being flipped back on. The heat between you two begins to smolder. When you look up from the bag you handed him and meet his eyes there is an intensity that washes over you. You are in the CSU standard blue jumpsuit, but you never felt more exposed. It was like he could see right through it. The passion in his dark brown eyes, there was no mistaking that he knew exactly what you were referring to. “Was just waiting on you, Carino.” His words are a husky purr. When he senses someone coming towards you guys, he hands the evidence bag back to you. The roughness of the callous on his hands scratches against your gloves as his touch lingers with promise. 
It hadn’t taken long for you to receive a text from an unknown number asking about the next night. You hadn’t questioned how he had gotten your number, just saved him to your contacts under the name Amaro. You guys agreed that your place would be the better choice because his five-year-old daughter Zara was living full-time with him. You could understand him not wanting to bring you into his child’s home even with her being away for the night with her grandmother. It was just better that way, simpler. 
You knew it would be awkward. You had never set up a one-night stand before. Not to mention you were younger than Nick. Not by a lot but enough to make you feel like he was the more experienced. Anxiety and lust fought inside your stomach as you waited for Nick to show up. You drank some wine to just take the edge off. It was a sharp fruity flavor that you could barely taste the alcohol. You only had glass but it helped ease the nerves. 
It was a little awkward when Nick first arrived. There was no immediate ripping of clothes off like hookups on TV. Nick was a detective, and his assessing eyes took over your small but mostly tidy apartment as soon as he walked in the door. You were still starting out in a small one-bedroom apartment. The look of the place was bohemian with pops of color and pattern. Your ex who wanted everything to look like it had just come out of a magazine had hated it. It was too girly and not tasteful enough. You had grown up in a lower-middle-class family in a small town. Your home wasn’t supposed to be about first impressions but self-expression and comfort. Nick didn’t seem to mind at all and after his obligatory checking of the room, his attention was returned to you. 
The heat of his body was becoming familiar to you as he stepped into your space. His thumb brushed across your cheek as he tilted your head and his lip caught yours. Just like that the switch had been turned back on. Lust bloomed through your body along with an intoxicating heat. You pushed onto your toes to get closer, your arm hesitantly coming up to his neck. You moaned as his tongue ran over your bottom lip. You allowed the kiss to deepen but Nick pulled back tasting the alcohol still lingering in your mouth. Your brows crinkled in confusion. “You’ve been drinking.”  
“It was only a glass of wine. I’m not drunk.” He pushes your hair out of your face, his perspective eyes studying yours. You stare back at him with no hesitation because you know he won’t find any deceit there. You're not drunk. He isn’t taking advantage of you. You want to have sex with him. It had been so long; your ex and you had stopped months before the breakup. 
“You know we don’t have to do this. That any time you can say no.” You smile at him. He works at SVU it made sense that he wanted confirmed consent. It was sweet, even if it was slightly unexpected. You easily oblige him. 
“I know but I want to.” You press your body fully into his feeling heat bloom through you as you rub up against him as you lean up for a kiss. “I want you to make good on your promise. Please.” It seems to be all the encouragement that he needs. His lips find yours again for a hot open mouth kiss. The kisses were sloppy and needy.  
Even with taking a few minutes to find a rhythm, it was clear that Nick was a great kisser. It seemed that charming women wasn’t the only thing that Nick’s tongue was good at. The awkwardness passed in a flash. The kisses continued as he backed you into your bedroom. He took his time undressing you, starting with your shirt and bra, kissing every inch of the newly exposed skin. He laid you on the bed as his lips traveled down your neck towards your now bare chest. His hands rub up your ribs causing you to shiver. One of his hands found your breast as his mouth latched on to your other nipple. You groaned and arched into him gripping his shoulders. His tongue circles your hardened nipple insistently and you hiss when he bites down just hard enough to leave an echo of pain that he soothes with his mouth. The pain mixes with your pleasure and you can feel the rush of arousal dampen your already wet panties. He switches to the other to give it the same attention. 
You tug at his crisp white dress shirt. While you were half naked Nick hadn’t lost any clothes yet aside from his suit jacket and shoes that he had taken off at the door. You had just managed to pull the shirt free of his pants and your fingers had finally found hot, tanned skin when he pulled back. His body heat was taken away as he stood leaving you cold and feeling exposed your arms crossed your chest unconsciously.  
Nick who was standing in front of you unbuttoning his shirt caught the movement and he tsked, “Oh hermosa, te sientes timida? (beautiful, are you feeling shy?) I promise you, by the end of the night you are going to feel like a Reina (queen).” There was surety in his tone as he undid the buttons on his cuffs before rolling them up his forearms and taking the shirt off. He leaned forward, putting his hands on either side of you caging you in. Your eyes were fixated on his newly exposed toned chest. He closed the distance and you arched into him when his naked chest brushed yours. You wrapped your arms around him caressing his back. He left an open-mouthed kiss on your neck before whispering in your ear. “I’m going to make you feel poderosa, caliente, y en control de tu sexualidad. (Powerful, hot, and in control of your sexuality) There will be no space left for you to feel shy.” 
His fingers brushed the waistband of your jeans. Your hips rocked up in response. He chuckled making quick work of your jeans leaving you in only a pair of soaked panties. He groaned as he cupped you rubbing you over the wet lace. “You’re already soaked. ¿Necesitabas desesperadamente esta atención? (Were you in desperate need of this attention?)” He presses one finger against your core and your fingertips curl into his skin as it easily slides in. He pumps it inside you a few times before adding a second. Your nails scratch at his back as you rock firmly against him. You curse as he pulls them out of you once again leaving you needy and squirming.  
“Nick,” It comes out breathless, and his face wears a cocky smirk. He brings the fingers that were just inside you to his greedy mouth and sucks them clean while he looks straight into your eyes. And fuck is it hot. Everything Nick does is somehow sensual. You’ve never been this wet this quickly before. Who knew Spanish words, only half of which you could understand could turn you on so much. Wasn’t French supposed to be the seductive language? Or would it not have the same effect if it didn’t come from Nick’s wicked mouth? 
You watch that hand leave his lips and go down to his belt. You can feel his heavy stare on you as you watch him shed his pants and then his underwear. Your lips part in an inaudible gasp. Nick Amaro in all his glory is a sight as hot as sin. He is also above average... and then some. His cock is thick and long and already fully hard. It was bigger than anyone that you had ever been with, and your ex by far. You watched with rapid attention as his hand wrapped around his dick pumping it a few times. “Carino,” Your eyes shoot up to Nick’s blush staining your cheeks. His fingers curl around the elastic of your panties and you lift your hips so he can pull them off. “Slide back on the bed and get on your knees for me.” 
You do as you're told, and he follows you onto the bed. He kisses you again, rougher more demanding. You moan into the kiss while his hands trail over your body, gripping and stroking your naked form. He broke the kiss by pulling at your hip forcing you to turn around, so your back was pressed tightly against his chest. He ground his cock against your ass and you both groaned.  
You were a little confused by the abrupt change in position when he was the one who had requested it. When you looked up though you realized why. Nick had positioned you directly in front of the mirror that you were now facing. His eyes were trained on yours in its reflection. You dropped your head letting your eyes fall closed. Nick’s mouth was hot and wet as he kissed up your neck to your ear. Two of his fingers found your soaking core again. You moaned when he started pumping them in and out of your wet heat, his fingers curling deliciously inside of you. The fire in your belly grew as you rutted into his fingers. His other hand slid up your body making its way to your throat. The pressure was gentle, barely there, raising your chin up. Your eyes open and you find his in the mirror again.    
His hot breath made you shudder as he whispered into your ear, “I’m going to show you how a man should make you feel. I’m going to give you everything you want, and more.” You groan his name in response. His tongue traces the shell of your ear, “The only thing I want you to do for me is watch. I want you to watch me take you there. Can you be a good girl and do that for me?”  
You aren’t sure if you can, but Nick’s fingers are still working you and his thumb has found your clit. The rubbing is madding and pushing you closer and closer to your orgasm you can feel it clenching your stomach. Your eyes go down the mirror and watch as his fingers fuck into your cunt. His other hand is sliding back around you as he plays with a nipple. Your orgasm hits you less than a minute later. You force your head back onto his shoulder your hips bucking into his fingers sloppily as he works you through your pleasure. 
When you come back to yourself you notice that Nick’s rocking against your ass more firmly now. His precum leaked onto your skin. His fingers have stopped, and he slowly removes them from your core. When nothing else follows you open your eyes and look back into the mirror to find Nick’s brown eyes. “That’s a good girl.” He continues to caress your body running his hands all over your exposed flesh as he nips and sucks at your neck, shoulders, and upper back. You find that after the release of an orgasm, you don’t feel as self-conscious. And watching the mirror, as you were asked, wasn’t hard when you were focused on Nick instead of yourself.  
You watch as he reaches for the condom that he had set on the nightstand and pulls just far enough away from you to slip it on. When the head of his cock finds your entrance, you know it’s going to be a stretch. Still, high on your pleasure, you can't find it in yourself to worry. Instead, you are rocking with him coating him with your arousal. When he pushes in there is a generous slide from your wetness but it’s still a stretch. You force yourself not to close your eyes at the sensation because seeing his face in the mirror when his slow movement finally has him bottomed out in you is magical.  
He gives you a moment to adjust to his size but soon you're wiggling against him because you need him to move. He starts off slow with a steady rhythm, both of you getting used to each other. Your eyes are glued to the mirror watching his arms wrap around you. His hands caress your skin, playing with your breast, and rolling your nipples. Watching him take pleasure in your body is erotic. He is playing with your clit, and you can feel another orgasm building quickly. His hand twists in your hair turning you to face him. He doesn’t kiss you, not really, your lips are barely brushing as you share air. Your orgasm washes over you and his lips crash onto yours stealing your cry of pleasure. Your walls squeeze him tightly and he picks up his pace.  
You’re spent and fall forward, Nick lets you down to your elbows slowly. You are on all fours now as you try to catch your breath and regain your senses. He presses down on your upper back making you arch your ass up higher. You swear because the change in angle lets him hit deeper sending a rush of wetness through your core. The extra slide allows Nick to thrust deeper inside of you. His tip finds a sensitive spot that leaves your thighs shaking and your walls flutter against him. He curses in Spanish as his thrusts get sloppy and his orgasm slams through him. He continues to rock against you as he empties himself into the condom.  
He falls forward, his upper half pressing you down. You can feel each of his harsh breaths as his chest heaves with his excursion. His forehead is pressed against your sweaty back. He stays like that for only a minute as his breathing evens out. He lifts his head and runs his hand down your spine. You hiss as he pulls out of you leaving you feeling empty. He gets up to take care of the condom.  
You roll over onto your back your arms resting over your head spread out like a starfish. Your body is tingling from your head to the tips of your fingers and toes with leftover sensation and your mind has been scrambled. You haven’t felt this warm, sated, and absolutely exhausted in years.
You don’t hear Nick come back but you feel the mattress dip when he sits down. When you open your eyes to look you see he has pulled his boxers back on and is holding a glass of wine from the bottle you had opened earlier and a beer from the fridge. “I hope you don’t mind.” 
You shake your head because at this moment he could rob you blind and you probably just lay there and let him with a satisfied smile on your face. “Thank you,” You sit up and take the glass from him.
You take a sip, and it tastes even better now. You would swear at this moment that good sex makes everything better. Nick leans back into the pillows as he rests his back against the headboard. He holds out his arm up in an offering. You only hesitate for a minute as you climb over to cuddle up with him on top of the covers. He runs his hand along your back, a smug satisfied smile on his face as he takes a long pull of his beer. He looks proud of himself. You don’t think much of it after all he had just got off. Later after he leaves and you are just falling asleep do you understand. 
You echo his words half asleep into the dark empty room. “No place left for you to be shy.”  
Alright, guys so what does the Jury think?  
I also want to say the amount of love I have been getting on my stories is amazing! I thought that the SUV fandom had died out and that's why I started writing my own but I’m so glad to see it’s not. I am running out of stories to read though so if you have any recs, please send them to me!!! 
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It really helped ❤️❤️🥰
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Nick Amaro- A Crowded Bar Question 
There is now a second NSFW Part 2
I’m almost done rewatching season 13 and Nick Amaro has come back to retake over my life. Not that I’m complaining.  
You sat at the police bar nursing a second long island trying to gather your thoughts. Your relationship with your long-term boyfriend, a homicide detective, had just ended painfully a week prior. He had put you through the wringer while you were together and shredded your self-esteem into ribbons so thin that you didn’t think you would ever be able to put them back together. 
You heard a cheer go out and your eyes darted to where Finn and Nick were playing pool. Nick was showing off twirling the pool stick in his hands, clearly proud of himself. You feel a small smile tug at your lips before it falls again. You shouldn’t have come out here tonight, you were not good company. You feel just a bit beyond tipsy, it would have to be your last drink. You were pretty sure it had been a pity ask anyway.   
You worked in the Crime Scene Unit and had developed a friendship with the SVU detectives. You had thought it was classic work friendships, but as your relationship worsened, you became closer to the people you worked with. This wasn’t the first time you had been out and about with them or at this bar. Your ex frequented here, while he ignored you to hang out with his buddies you had spent more time with the SVU clan. 
“Hey, you okay over here?” You look up and straight into the concerned brown eyes of Nick. He had taken his suit jacket off and his white button-up clung to him in all the right places, the sleeves had been rolled up his forearms. You couldn’t deny his attractiveness. You had been harboring a little meaningless one-sided crush on him for a while. He would never reciprocate it, but he had been kind to you when watching you struggle through your toxic relationship. He was a strong male and protectiveness and strength leaked from him almost as strong as his undeniable charm. 
Nick’s eyebrows pinched together in concern, and you realized that you had been staring at him without answering his question. “I’m okay, just gonna finish this and then head home.” You look at your drink, it is almost gone, and down the rest so that you don’t have to hold eye contact with a very perceptive detective. You throw a tip down on the table and when you stand the alcohol hits you and you feel how strong your buzz really is. A warm hand grips your forearm to steady your slight stumble and you feel heat rush up your arm. 
“Easy now, let me just grab my jacket and I’ll get a car to take you home.” You know by the tone of his voice that it isn’t negotiable and nodded. He leads you with a hand on your lower back over to the corner where the pool table is. He grabs his jacket and you're close enough to smell his cologne. It is musky with a sharp spice, and it makes you take another deep breath to savor the smell. By the time he turns back to face you, the alcohol has disintegrated what little brain-to-mouth filter you possess.  
“Nick, I want to ask you something,” You can feel the weight of his attention shifting fully to you, “But I don’t want to make it weird, and I want you to be honest.” He looks serious as he gives his agreement folding his jacket over his arm. “Do you find me attractive?” His stoic face doesn’t change, and you barrel on embarrassedly before he can answer or you can change your mind, “That is if you saw me in a crowded bar and I was just some random girl you didn’t know, would you look twice?” The silence is heavy but not as heavy as his gaze. The buzz still running through you is the only thing that allows you to stand your ground and not be completely mortified. Just as you're about to tell him to forget it, that you are just drunk, he responds. 
“You want me to be honest Carino? No, I wouldn’t take a second look,” Before the hurt can register, he takes a step forward into your personal space one of his hands still resting on your lower back. His chest brushed yours as he leaned in his mouth next to your ear. “Because I wouldn’t be able to tear my eyes away from you to get the chance. You, not some random girl in a crowded bar. Dios mio, you have no idea what you do to me, do you? How tempting your body is?” His hot breath sent shivers down your spine and his hand moved farther south just above your ass and he pulled you half a step closer, your bodies flush together. Hot dirty Spanish words fell from his lips against your ear. Your drunk brain couldn’t even begin to process enough to try to translate but his tone and his trailing fingertips over the naked skin that was on display between your shirt and jeans made it obvious enough.  
“And let me tell you if you ever came here to meet me in a little black dress, like you did for that pendejo, I wouldn’t be talking to my friends and watching the game. I would be doing everything I could to get you out of it. I’d like to say I would be a gentleman take you home, but more likely I would be convincing you to let me bend you over the sink in the bathroom.” As he is speaking, he is rubbing the stubble of his beard against your cheek and neck. He presses a kiss against your skin where your shoulder and neck meet. His hot mouth nibbles there causing you to throw your head back with a whine. 
He pulls back to look into your eyes and pushes a loose strand of hair behind your ear caressing your cheek. You lean into him feeling a pull towards kissing him. He turns his head kissing your cheek instead. “Unfortunately, you are way past the point of consent. But if you decide to act on this when you're less vulnerable, sober. Carino, I will show you exactly how attractive I find you.” He steps back and the air instantly cools. Nick's demeanor changes back to a concerned friend. In those few moments, it had felt like the two of you were alone not in a crowded bar. You glanced around to see if anyone had noticed but between the dim lighting of the corner where his jacket had been and everyone's attention on the game playing on the TVs, it seemed that nobody had noticed the heated exchange.  
It was almost as if it was a dream. You would wonder if you had made the whole thing up the next morning. Just wishful drunken thinking or a too-real dream. It wouldn’t be until you got out of the shower later that day and noticed the slight bloom of a bruise on your neck that you would realize it had been real.  
I’ve been having some problems with my self-esteem and body issues. So, if you are struggling right now too, I hope Nick helped you like he did me. xoxo 
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detective sweetheart - n.a x fem!reader
posted nov 3rd, 2023 12:22 am
this was what i did for my "based on my day" challenge (i spent it watching svu season 14 lmfao) its also my first time writing for nick amaro or any detectives in general so I'm sorry if he's a bit ooc, its also a crossover with criminal minds and i think i made up the whole technical analyst assistant thing but that's my job in my criminal minds DR lmfao. hope you enjoy :)
this includes alcohol (reader consumption), use of Y/n, and possibly wrong wording for FBI stuff?? the reader likes children (in a not creepy way). Jennifer Jareau
summary: the BAU's technical analyst assistant develops quite the crush on SVU's detective Nick Amaro
masterlist
word count: 0.8k
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You sat quietly in a bar, sitting amongst a group of FBI agents you knew well and a few detectives you’d just recently had the pleasure of meeting, chatting about the now-closed case and a few chatting about their children, you hadn’t spoken much, too busy trying not to stare at Detective Nick Amaro.
“Detective Amaro, this is Y/n L/n, she’s our technical analyst assistant, our official technical analyst is back at Quantico focusing on another case” Your boss, Aaron Hotchner, introduced you to one of the detectives you’d be working with for a necrophilia serial killer case, 
You two spent the last few days working very closely together on this case. 
Penelope had been working on another case and due to a small fire that you and Penelope accidentally started with a candle in your already small office, Hotch decided to bring you with the team to Manhattan.
And of course, with your luck, Penelope couldn’t be there to fangirl over the hot detective with you, so you had to deal with the consequences of your short attention span all on your own, (granted our beloved Spencer did try to relate and fangirl with you, he did his best, but he was quite busy getting into conspiracy arguments with Sergeant John Munch).
Now that the case was over, Hotch decided that the team was in no rush back to Quantico and could leave in the morning, so while he called in early and left back to his hotel, the rest of you went out with some of the SVU detectives,
Including Nick 
of course.
“What about you? Got any kids?” Nick asked, accidentally snapping you out of your trance, as he handed JJ back her phone after she showed him a photo of her boys.
“Oh, uh”
fuck, he smelt good, why did Derek have to sit you right next to him?? 
“No, no kids, I do adore them though” You smiled in a way you hoped wasn’t too awkward, before Emily spoke up “She’s great with them too! I mean they just love her” 
Nick smiled at that, nodding as Emily talked. 
You laughed awkwardly in response, “she’s exaggerating” you whispered just loud enough for Nick to hear, earning a laugh. 
oh my god, he LAUGHS?
“As much fun this has been, I’m gonna call it a night” JJ announced, standing up from her seat, her actions mirrored by Spencer as he agreed. 
They were shortly followed by Olivia, Fin, and Emily. Derek went home with a pretty girl (obviously) and finally, Rossi left with Rollins, after she offered him a ride back to the hotel.
That left, you and Nick, alone
of fucking course
“So, miss L/n, how was your first time in New York, huh?” He asked, taking a sip of his bourbon or was it whiskey? Maybe scotch? You couldn’t remember
“Oh, you mean besides the corpse-loving freak? Pretty great, thanks for asking, Detective.” you joked, feeling less intimidated thanks to the vodka cranberry sitting in front of you.
He laughed, “Yeah, dumb question” he shook his head almost embarrassed but you were eating it up.
“How was your first time working with the BAU, hm?” Nick smiled as you practically hummed the question, he thought it was cute, and you could tell, which only boosted your confidence.
“Gotta be honest, I was worried you guys would swarm in and take everything over but, it was a lot easier than I expected” You nod in response, 
“A lot of people think that, but typically it’s an ego thing. was it an ego thing for you, Nicky?” The nickname had slipped off your tongue with ease as you teased your schoolgirl crush, having called him that just a few days ago when you first started working together.
Nick scoffed, “What? No, absolutely not” but the small smirk on his lips was a dead giveaway. “Okay, maybe it was kind of an ego thing, just a little bit” he whispered his confession. You all but giggled in response
“It’s gettin’ late, what do you say I walk you back to your hotel huh?” he offered, standing up and putting his coat on before reaching for yours 
“I’d like that, thank you, Detective” You smiled, standing from your seat and sighing as he carefully put your coat on for you.
The hotel wasn’t far but god you wished it had been, it would’ve given you some more time to flirt with the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen in your life
(exaggerating? Pft nuh-uh) 
But yet, here you stood, in front of the tall building that ruined your excitement.
“Hey, uh how would you feel if the next time you were in New York, I took you out?” Nick asked, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jacket, his tie hanging loosely around his neck.
You smiled, hoping the lights surrounding you both hid the blush on your cheeks instead of accentuating it. “Or if you’re ever in Virginia?” 
He smiled, nodding. 
“I think I’d like that a lot” You responded, quietly, suddenly very sober.
“Great, have a safe flight back home, alright?”
it's already over
“Thank you for walking me back, Nick” 
“Anytime, goodnight, sweetheart” he smiled once more.
Sweetheart
“Goodnight, detective”
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Holding Babies
Stabler [9x09]
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Fin [6x02]
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Amaro [16x03]
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Carisi [17x10]
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.........Barba [16x16]
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