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[glitching radio noises] Good morning, Campers— and welcome to the Mistholme Museum of Mystery, Morbidity, and Mortality— gale storms in Svalbard can reach wind speeds of up to 130 kilometers per hour— the museum is not responsible for any death, injury or— camp activities— that occur during your visit— I am SAYER— and these are our disciples in order of their arrival— if you believe that the Audio Tour Guide may be deviating from the intended tour program— it means hello from the Hallowoods— welcome to Night Vale.
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things indie audio drama fans love:
AI
gays in space
cryptids
found family
yearning
thus, i propose an audio drama about the spaceship AI of a crew that records their hunt for space cryptids for a living. the AI may or may not be in love with one of the crew members and may or may not have a secret folder full of poetry in an attempt to express these feelings
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Magnus vs. Goddard Holiday parties
The annual Magnus Institute holiday party.
    ▪    in the cafeteria
    ▪    Rosie organizes it
    ▪    Store bought and homemade decorations
    ▪    the saddest plastic Christmas tree ever.
    ▪    Potluck, usually the cheapest things bought from a discount store and of course Martin’s famous Christmas cookies
    ▪    Most common gift from a secret Santa is tape recorders
    ▪    Strange cloud of mist in the corner (That’s Peter)
    ▪    Elias is staring at you the entire time.
    ▪    Bring your own booze
    ▪    If you get drunk and  embarrass yourself, the gossip will follow you for years.
    ▪    Ancient stereo providing the tunes
No one actually wants to be there.
Goddard Futuristics holiday party
    ▪    In the Atrium in on the main campus
    ▪    Professional Event Planner hired to organize it.
    ▪    Professionally  and tastefully decorated, expect the animatronic Santa
    ▪    20 foot live  Christmas tree and is it…. Snowing lightly?
    ▪    Catered by the top firm in town,  bacon wrapped shrimp are to die for, so is the eggnog
    ▪    Most common Secret Santa gift is a brand new gadget Goddard is testing called Kit-T a small robotic ‘pet’ looks like a cute metal cat, it’s like a pet, Alexa, and a smartphone! (Also records all your conversations)
    ▪    Cutter is MCing the whole thing, he’s in a Christmas tux and at a grand piano in the center of the atrium
    ▪    Dr. Pryce stares at you the entire time.
    ▪    Open bar!
    ▪    If you get drunk and embarrass yourself you will be forcefully ejected, which includes a beating, jail and termination if you survive the beating
    ▪    DJ provides some of the tunes
No one actually wants to be there.
~~~~~
WHICH ONE WOULD YOU RATHER ATTEND?
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Songs that I think can apply to almost every podcast I have listened to:
The Fine Print by the Stupendium
King and Lionheart by Of Monsters and Men
The list is still a work in progress
Interesting!!
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I am considering making a video inspired by "the lost cast podcast"
Will it happen? Who knows but I think it would be a funny concept
👀 please send it to me if you do
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I think all the sentient disembodied third-person narrators of audio drama should just have a day off to dish with each other, as a treat.
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[audio transcript:
ZACH VALENTI: make your statement, face your fear.
[background music trails]
/end transcript]
i don't think theres many of you who've heard this but the whiplash i got
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Here’s your regular reminder that the funeral industry is a scam and we should all just have one big slumber party buried au naturel in compostable shrouds next to an oak tree. I’ll bring the snacks.
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Podcast moodboards!
Since I finished TMA and my insomnia has been playing up recently, I've started listening to Hello From the Hallowoods and if you like Nightvale and TMA, then I think you'll like Hallowoods too!
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Hi, I'm here for the cult stuff, where do I sign up?
*checks notes* Uhm, sorry, I think you have the wrong door? St. Kilda is one blog over at @thekilda , and the Aposthles of Antithon, uh, I think they are still waiting for their leader to return to... earth? Not sure if they accept new people. Let me see... No, I can not really think of any other cults right now. So sorry, I really think you are wrong here. Can I interest you in faking your death and starting a new life instead?
- Intern
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surprise, surprise, I did actually pass maths.
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(Cecil Palmer voice) Jon Sims, you know, the archivist?
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Penumbra Pod Junoverse x Fall of the House of Sunshine. FOTHOS is Junoverse if it was a musical & a chaotic WTF hot mess. Imagine if Junoverse covered some of the songs- highlights include Holey Moley Medley, First Ladies Action Vehicles Go!, Kill Something, Mop Top Throw Down, and Fuzzsticks(this one might be the story of Juno's depression).
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Okay I've been re-listening to The Amelia Project and now all that lives in my head is TMA finale Jon and Martin fake their deaths
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The council will decide your fate
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*sigh* oh to have a best frenemy that is just oneself from a different dimension. Also while we're at it: what about this guy? (That is of course the fancily dressed Obituary Writer of Crestfall, Idaho)
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Wait, I know this guy! How do I know this guy? Have I seen him around? Have I met him? Heard him? In any case - and from a personal point of view, I'd call them siblings. But I'd be more curious about what the rest of you think on this one!
- P.A. Intern
PS. @deathbydyingpod what do you think?
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