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askmarie-blog 12 years
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"Beautiful Disaster" || Jon McLaughlin
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Again, thank you for everything :) Even though your replies are really late, it's nice that you still reply to the questions :) You help a lot of people :) And again, I need your advice... I liked this boy. He used to like me. I stopped liking him. I liked another boy. The other boy sorta likes me. The first boy is now asking me out. He is creeping me out. What should I do? I could give him a chance. Or not. I'm not even allowed yet. He is really creepy sometimes. He's like my big brother.
See my last answer for my response to the late replies... I apologize profusely and THANK YOU for continuing to ask! I am so very happy to be here to help.I'm not sure what you mean by you're not "allowed" -- you mean that you're not allowed to date yet, presumably by your parents mandate? If you're unsure about how you feel, there is no reason to pursue something with this boy. If he's "creeping you out" -- make that known! Even if that means you might change your mind later, let him know that you're not interested in dating seriously or being more than friends right now. If he's a good friend of yours (which I'm taking from your saying he's like a brother to you) you should know that those sorts of relationships can be the very best or the not-so-good depending on circumstances! If you think it's something you'd like to pursue in the future, that protective care for you could turn into a great thing like it did for me. (I'm dating a boy I met when I was two... the one that I was best friends with my whole life and never saw as a romantic interest until last year!)
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askmarie-blog 12 years
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Okay so honestly, I used to be one of your top followers, I checked on here everyday for an entire summer until you just disappeared. After that I just checked in whenever I remembered to. What happened to you? You just stopped answering the questions and I know there were questions since I sent in three. This wasn't my actual account when I started following you, this is an alias account. You haven't been on this thing since Oct. I miss you. We miss you. Please come back.
Hello there! This is going to be a universal answer to any question I've received that is similar to this one...聽I was (and am) so passionate about this blog, but had previously believed it to be a complete flop! There were months in a row that I received absolutely聽zero questions, and I have very few followers (possibly because most of the questions I receive are anonymous, which is perfectly okay!) So I decided to let it be, guessing that there are more popular advice blogs out there and this one didn't gain any traction.聽HOWEVER... because I haven't been checking it regularly, I've come back to about three or four very serious questions. I apologize to you ALL for not having seen them sooner (and of course, Tumblr doesn't date-mark them, so I don't have an idea of when they were submitted.) But this is my promise to check into this blog as regularly as possible for the next month or so, because I absolutely will not neglect any messages that I receive!In conclusion: THANK YOU ALL for continuing to follow, despite the giant pause in this blog's traffic. Starting today, it will be renewed!聽
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askmarie-blog 12 years
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I'm a 15 year old female and bisexual but for a while I've been questioning if I'm full gay or not. I prefer women a lot more, and don't really show any interest in guys except a few celebs. My mum & best friend think I should try a boyfriend first because I've never had one but I just really don't want a boyfriend. I just can't imagine myself with one and if a good looking guy asked me out I know I'd say no straight away. My mum thinks that its because most men in my life have been idiots. Help
Hi darling.The most important thing is to first point out (as I'm sure you know) that your mum and your friends have ZERO SAY in what you prefer, what you want, what you choose to value in your life. As long as they are supportive and love you unconditionally, that is the limit of their role in your dating life. I understand that they'd encourage you to "check" to see if you'd be interested in a boyfriend, but if you automatically know that does not appeal to you, there is no sense in wasting your time to find out!Sexuality is a continuum, not a scale with two ends and a middle! Even if you call yourself bisexual, you can still be a bisexual who usually prefers women, and men maybe 2% of the time under the right circumstances. It is very possible, as your mum said, that you haven't had the best examples of men in your life. If that is the case, you will know when a man with good character comes along, and maybe he will change your mind about being interested in a boyfriend.If you can, don't worry so much about the label of "bisexual" or "gay" -- that is something that will reveal itself to you with time.For now, you can only continue to explore your emotions and interests and let your mind, heart, and body decide what's right for you!
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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"Look at you. You're young. And you're scared. Why are you so scared? Stop being paralyzed. Stop swallowing your words. Stop caring what other people think. Wear what you want. Say what you want. Listen to the music you want to listen to. Play it loud as fuck and dance to it. Go out for a drive at midnight and forget that you have school the next day. Stop waiting for Friday. Live now. Do it now. Take risks. Tell secrets. This life is yours. When are you going to realize that you can do whatever you want?"
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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I received this message...
and for whatever reason, Tumblr published it as a straight-post without allowing me to 'answer' it first! I'm so sorry to have lost the identity of the sender...hopefully the answer reaches you anyway! The question is below, my response in bold. :) "HELP !Hello I need Advice聽! so i their this girl named SHALET which is my girl friend (I鈥檓 Bisexual) & then there鈥檚 this girl name GABBY which is my friend which use to go out with my girlfriend SHALET聽! me & Shalet started to go out on august 25 and at first we decide to keep the relationship Quite Then Just Recently The Beginning of this month we decide to make our relationship Public . So a few people im real close with I told them that me & shalet Goes Out .Then 1 week later i find out that she use to go out with my friend gabby I wouldn鈥檛 call her my best friend but my friend like she had my back a few times and when ever i see her in school she says hi and i give her a hug . Now Today On my way to school i took the Bus with her & out聽 of no where she ask me for a favor , to tell my girlfriend shalet that she loves her keep in mind she does not know that me & shalet are dating now) and she keep telling me about them two & how she鈥檚 madly in love with her , So i tryed to tell her that i go out wit shalet but she wouldnt believe me so i said nevamind cause i didnt want to hurt her feelings . Now i feel Bad & i dont know what to do聽! like Gabby is a nice friend to me & had my back a couple of times & Shalet i Like her alot she鈥檚 a good Girlfriend聽! WHAT SHOULD I DO聽? i dont want to hurt anybody聽!! and Plus i told my girlfriend shalet today about gabby loving her alot But she said she HATES HER & she doesnt want to get back wit her聽! HELP聽! HELP聽!" Wow! This is a complicated situation for sure... but you did everything in your power to prevent both parties from getting hurt! It was not your responsibility to carry out Gabby's wish for you to let Shalet know her feelings... as Shalet's girlfriend, that is DEFINITELY not a comfortable or necessary position for you to be in. So you went above and beyond your call of duty by let Shalet know. You tried to fill Gabby in, but if she would not hear you, that is not your fault. Nor is it your fault that Shalet has zero interest in Gabby! The answer is clear, then. You stay with Shalet as long as you can do so without feeling guilt about it/as long as you are interested in her. (There is no reason you SHOULD feel guilty!) If you feel that you owe it to Gabby to NOT be with Shalet because you value your friendship over your relationship, that is up to you. <3 Marie聽
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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Thanks for the last advice :) And now I've finally told him but it was only because I was afraid of seeing him on his birthday which was yesterday. And I made a great way of ruining it because I told him a few weeks before. And now he's completely ignoring it but I've learned to live with it. Though my friends gave me a hard time when they found out, even if they were the ones who told me to do it. I understand but I wish they would also understand my side. I wasn't happy with what I did.
I'm proud of you for opening yourself up like that! As you said...even if he is choosing to ignore it, YOU can live with it knowing that you did all that you could to make him aware of the situation. If the ball was in his court and he chose not to act, you cannot blame yourself for that. Just pick your head up and keep moving on... your friends need to learn to trust your instincts as well as you do.
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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Hello :) I love your blog and the fact that you always make time to help us in out own problems :) I was wondering if you could help me. There was this boy who liked me best friend who also used to like him back but then she started liking the boy's best friend who also liked her. It didn't work out for any of them. The two boys, we're friends but I always feel awkward around the second boy. Why is that? And I used to like the second boy but none of them knew that. Eventually my crush on him just disappeared. Now both boys are talking to me like we've always been friends who normally talk to each other. Back then we rarely talked. We only talked because of my best friend. During the time that I liked the other boy I was wondering if I also liked the first boy but found that I simply enjoyed his company. Since they both started talking to me I was wondering what was up. For the first boy I decided he was just bored since we used to hang out even without my best friend. For the second boy I wondered why he was so friendly. I'm afraid that if he keeps this up I might start to like him again and I already know he won't like me back. He doesn't like girls like me. Another problem is he's gonna be my classmate this year and the awkwardness might still be there. What do I do?
Hi, love. Thank you first and foremost for the compliment :) I am so happy to lend whatever help I can to my beautiful followers!First of all, awkwardness doesn't necessarily mean that you have a crush on someone...there may simply be tension that arises from a difference in personalities or a lack of things to talk about, etc. If you are afraid of an "unrequited" crush, then pay close attention to how he talks to you. Don't let yourself fall for him if you KNOW he won't like you back, but you also shouldn't rule out that possibility right away! There's really no such things as "types" -- he may realize that you are exactly the sort of girl he wants to be with, but you have to prove it first! Just keep your head held high at school and don't let the awkwardness phase you
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Hello :) So, how can you tell if a guy still likes you? You see, there was this guy from my class a year ago. We liked each other but we were never actually together. He had to transfer away from our school so I never saw him again. He couldn't visit the school either. We tried to make it work like long distance but... Well, we couldn't find much time for each other. Eventually we got into a few fights with each other and after one of these fights, I realized I only liked him as a friend now. He just got a phone and ever since we've been texting each other none stop. I want to tell him just in case he still likes me and I don't want him to get hurt. But I like talking to him and if I tell him about that it will get very awkward and we won't talk anymore... I know it's selfish.. So, how do I tell him? I really don't want him to be like my other classmate who transferred after a year at our school. During that year he apparently liked me though he knew I never liked me back. It's been almost 3 years and he says he still likes me...
Hi darling :) I am so sorry for the late response. Hopefully you are still checking in!--You made the point yourself, you don't want to lead this boy on and have him end up being hurt. You have to let this take first priority over your enjoyment of the conversation. Even if you don't want to say it that outwardly, just make sure you're only giving "friend" vibes... don't flirt over text messaging, and maybe don't text him as often as you do. That definitely gives the wrong impression.So long as he doesn't make advances or say he misses you, asks to hang out, etc... then you are okay without having to confront him directly. If it does get to that point though, find the courage to say what you said to me! You're only interested as a friend, and apologize for making him think otherwise.Best of luck! --Marie聽
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askmarie-blog 13 years
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queencrash:
I lied. I want universal love to be the theme today.
Universal love it is! :)
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Hi, darlings! I deeply apologize for my slightly-extended absence. I have been in the process of moving from London back to the States in the past weeks, but I am now ready and open for all of the questions that you can toss in my direction!聽
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