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I’m still here but I still wanna die. I need a way to do it where it won’t hurt, where I’ll just go to sleep and not wake up. Idk if my medication is strong enough for that, so if I try & I fail I’ll be put away in a hospital without being able to try again. So this has to be perfect & it has to work.

#mental health #depressing shit

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“Don’t be afraid of your fears. They’re not there to scare you. They’re there to let you know that something is worth it.”

— Unknown

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September is tomorrow. Which means it is more socially acceptable to start celebrating Halloween. So…

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some of my favorite spooky ladies + flowers and bouquets 🌹💐  

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“You’ve got to find yourself first. Everything else’ll follow.”

— Charles de Lint

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I really really wanna die.

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“The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.”

— Mark Twain

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I woke up this morning and I saw all over Facebook that a girl I used to know when I lived back in my hometown killed her self due to mental illness. She had a girlfriend of 10 years they seemed really happy and she was a very happy person very funny and very outgoing and then this. They say it’s true to check on your happy friends because they are the saddest and I agree we tend to put on the smile because there’s so much pain that we know that people will see it so we have to pretend extra hard to be extra happy. Her suicide hit me really hard because I was going to do it yesterday last night was my last night and I couldn’t do it I couldn’t get myself to take those pills because all I thought about was not my pain I thought about the pain I would bring to my mom into my girlfriend and other people that I would be leaving behind. That should’ve been me this morning on those Facebook posts that could’ve been me I know those rest in peace signs but this morning I woke up and I’m glad that it wasn’t but I also realize that I need help I need more help than what I thought I needed and I’m scared I’m scared because I don’t want to do it but I’m so afraid that I will.

#mental health #love #self improvement #motivation #depressing shit #i'm sad #sadnees #suicidal #this is a cry for help #someone help #pls help #mentalhealthawareness #mentally tired #mentally unstable

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Is it possible that you could feel so sad because you’re so happy because you just cannot possibly explain your happiness or accept the fact that you are somebody who is so normal and so healthy and it becomes a problem because you’re so mentally unstable and everything they do makes you worry and wonder and at the end of the day just becomes a problem and then you just feel like you have to be alone because no one will ever understand who or what you feel..

#mental health #motivation #self improvement #self love #depressing shit #i'm sad #sadnees #poem #self care #love

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