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annoinferno · 1 hour
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Good Bad Time (29.3.24)
Bad news: I've been glutened so this post will be short.
Good news: I got my hair cut and the new cut is great.
Bad news: the color is wrong and I want it fixed.
Good news: I got into Simmons, my top choice for grad school, so I'll be accepting my offer and enrolling!
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annoinferno · 2 days
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Hobbyist (27.3.24)
Today I watched a lot of anime with RCC, and made some maps for my Cyberpunk players to cause trouble in, and then when I intended to do more work for CPR, instead I did a project I've put off for a year or so.
Children of the Stones was a 1976 British TV miniseries, sci-fi in the Doctor Who sense of the time, but with an actual interest in being consistent. It takes place in an English village and concerns the odd qualities of some standing stones in the area. It aired in 7 episodes, but when I found it online it was as a single 2.5 hour behemoth.
Unfortunately I found the subtitles as seven pieces corresponding to the original format, which included "last time on" recap segments, titles, and credits.
It took me a little while to figure out a work flow but I got one eventually, and it was a pleasant task to tinker through. I learned every episode had a mid-point break I had to re-time around, but others the subtitles were very clean and correct.
Except for one little thing. At the end of a single episode the subtitles switched to Italian. It was only a dozen lines, and they seemed to be a genuine translation effort and not a machine translation based on how they handled certain phrases, such as "but why not?" which wasn't transferred exactly literally. I'm assuming they were as official as the English subtitles I'd been working with, but couldn't actually tell you. They were in a scene with some technical language I don't know, so I had to mark a few things as unclear.
How the Italian lines got mixed into the English subtitles is a mystery.
Anyway that's the kind of thing I do for fun sometimes. I'm not one of those monsters of effort who is responsible for thirty scientifically accurate Wikipedia articles about fish, but I do my small part. By which I mean I haven't even uploaded my version of the subtitles anywhere, maybe I'll do that tomorrow.
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annoinferno · 4 days
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Lessons in DMing (25.3.24)
So I've been running Cyberpunk Red for awhile now and I want to write down some lessons I've learned:
1. check in with your players!
This seems so obvious, but it's very helpful for me every time I do it. Hooray, players!
2. When the rules suck, fix them.
I've usually played games where either rules didn't exist because they were so light or they were like DnD where you only go poking around with a serious purpose. CPR is a game with weird vague holes all over and a lot of the rules you do get kinda suck. Armor is a big example. Armor only gets damaged if damage goes over it, by the rules, but that can cause certain armor levels to feel invincible unless you build exactly for them. We made it ablate much quicker which actually makes life dangerous for the PCs but also saves them from having to roll 10 attacks just to start wearing down the biggest bads.
3. Get players involved if they want to be.
Mine have started suggesting new items and rules, and I love it. Some new item creation is offered by the invention rules, but they're suggesting new ones for the market and it's rad. They also suggest NPCs and plots to me which is very helpful to see what they want to do. We're playing a very open ended game which is not my usual experience, so it's all very handy for me.
4. The game is what you make it.
Obvious! But sometimes as DM I'm too cautious, too conservative because I'm worried my players won't like it. Ridiculous. If they don't like it they can speak up or I'll ask them. I need to be more adventurous.
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annoinferno · 6 days
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Old Stuff Is Better (23.3.24)
I dropped 3 of the 4 anime I picked up this season because they weren't as good as Dennou Coil, a show from 2007 I started watching recently.
Most recent novels I read can't hold a can't to older ones.
Movies? Same thing.
Old shit is just better.
At least when you to get to use the sieve of curation and selection. There were at least 2 shows this season that were great. If that is the case every season then there were 8 great shows a year, or 80 a decade. I think the actual numbers are often higher, but it's easy to see why it feels like the 90s had so much great anime, it's because the 80 best shows are pretty well known now, that sort of thing.
I do prefer the look of older stuff to a lot of newer stuff, but that's not really what makes a show better. I love beautiful animation but Yu Yu Hakusho moves worse than a lot of more recent stuff. Greatness is deeper than just that.
I just wrote this for myself really, because every so often I think, damn I dropped three shows this season? Maybe anime sucks now. But it obviously doesn't.
This turned out to be not nearly as deep as it felt when I started writing it, I think I really have to go to sleep.
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annoinferno · 7 days
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Back of Potatoes (22.3.24)
I've been doing my physical therapy stretches and have another appointment on Monday but wow.
So the initial shoulder issue, the one so bad I couldn't think at times, is gone. I mean my shoulder still hurts sometimes but nowhere near the previous level and it's getting better.
As that pain dies down, pain elsewhere becomes easier to feel, and it turns out to be my entire back and neck.
My stretches are demanding, for me anyway. I don't do them on days I feel unable, but I think they are slowly helping. They leave me sore so it can be hard to tell!
As the stretches get rid of knots and such, my back starts to feel very different. I mean when I lie down in bed, it doesn't feel like the same thing. All the hard built up stress I've been laying on is softened and sore muscle which lies flatter.
Yes, it is so dramatic that the actual felt shape of my back has changed.
And I'm very tired, so goodnight!
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annoinferno · 9 days
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High Comedy (20.3.24)
I'm using speech to text here and I don't plan to edit it, so I'm sorry.
It's not usually like me to talk about specific real world politics on this blog, I don't mean political issues, but rather politicians and the function of government. But some really funny shit has been happening in my state thought I'd like to put all in one place.
First of all, no one likes my governor. Like everyone else in this story he's a republican, but his own party hates him, the Democrats hate him, he's just kind of there. I don't know how he got elected. He's a big fan of DeSantis, and wanted DeSantis to win the presidential primary here, but instead he came in third, with barely 3,000 votes. Embarrassing.
Next up is the state senate. Some of the extra conservative senators started filibustering every bill that hit the floor because the bills they had introduced weren't being read and voted on, so they were throwing a hissy fit. They straight up gave a list of bills to read to the Senate majority leader as a ransom list. Then the Senate majority leader said he wouldn't do it because he doesn't negotiate with terrorists, his exact words. Then he clarified he wasn't calling them terrorists, but rather that their actions were terroristic. He wants to have his senator and terroristic it too, something like that. So that's pretty fucking funny all around. Then the governor no one likes called the filibusters of victory for small government. I guess he wanted to feel involved. I think it's pretty inappropriate for the executive to comment on the legislature like that, which is the sort of line I wouldn't normally give a shit if anyone crossed, but I think every chance to criticize him is a good one.
Next up is the state superintendent of education. This man is a piece of shit. He's a piece of shit in the extreme. His comments about trans people have been so reprehensible that even the evangelicals have balked. But that's not what I want to talk about.
What I want to talk about is how under his guidance the state has been trying to form a charter school that's Catholic. I don't want to get into the details of what the fuck a charter school is, but it amounts to giving state funds to the church in this case, which is a direct violation of the Constitution in my opinion. I am a lawyer so it matters a great deal that I think. I'm also a doctor. Anyway, the state attorney general doesn't like this, so he's suing the charter school commission, which is a state agency. This is going to the state supreme court.
The state superintendent keeps trying to join the suit, and wants to give a comment to the court during the proceedings, the way that other two parties get to give opening arguments. The court has it rejected this petition three times, three fucking times, and for the funniest reasons. The first reason is boring actually, he just hasn't given the court enough of an argument for why he should even be allowed to do this, not really much of a specific rejection. The second reason is great though. The second reason is that both of the other parties in the lawsuit have asked that he not be able to do this. They're fighting each other and they don't even want him involved at all, it's so good.
I hate pretty much everyone involved in all of this, and if lightning struck them it would be a good day for everyone. But I love watching them fight, it gives me a sick thrill. They are absolute clowns, and the best part is they don't realize it. So while they are all scum, at least they are entertaining scum.
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annoinferno · 11 days
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Approach (a fiction) (17.3.24)
She began to lay down on the gravel path, but had to stop when the gravel bit into her hands and side, a level of discomfort she was unwilling to tolerate for her protest. Unable to think of anything else to do about it, she sat on the gravel, which was still quite bad but tolerable for now. "I don't want to go," she said.
He looked down at her, then up along the path. "It's only a quarter mile further."
She pouted. "No."
He picked her up and set her feet back on the ground, "Miriam, you have to walk the rest of the way back to the car. We can't live here on the trail."
She kicked a piece of gravel which rolled off the toe of his boot. "Don't wanna."
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annoinferno · 12 days
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Admitted (16.43.24)
I got an admissions offer from Kent State for grad school! They're my second choice and I'm still waiting to hear from my first choice school, but already this is great news. It saves me a lot of trouble as well, because I had two applications to work on, still, but now I can drop those.
Also I got new tattoos. The bandages have come off and they look great but feel like sunburns still.
Spent a lot of today trying to work on my body, by which I mean physical therapy and exercise. Fucking exhausted from it. Didn't even do that much, just really tired these days.
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annoinferno · 14 days
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Streisand (15.3.24)
Happy Ides of March.
There's another wave of discussion about censorship here in the center of the world. The proposed tiktok ban alongside KOSA, both of which would have global impacts on cyberspace, have real potential to pass. It's unclear if that's actually the likely outcome, but it's a possible one.
I can't see the tiktok ban going well. I don't like the platform and many of the effects it has, but a national ban on it is about the worst possible solution I can imagine besides state ownership of it. And of course the motivation behind the move has little to do with the actual problems it poses in society.
I don't! Like living in! Active history! Knowing that the time we're going through right now is going to be called some kind of period or era, not cool.
Obviously all times that get recorded are history, and as an aspiring archivist I can't be too opposed to the flow of time, that's the job after all, but I still wish it was a calmer time, one where our biggest public worry was the tax code or some shit.
Now it's hard to even pin down the biggest public worry, and whatever it is isn't even my biggest private worry because whether it's war or climate change, the attempt to eradicate trans people falls rather more acutely on me and mine.
I think of the anarchists in Disco Elysium, and how they aren't even around to struggle against the events of the game.
Sorry for being so dire. I actually had a nice day and am looking forward to the future.
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annoinferno · 16 days
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Ink Tomorrow (23.3.24)
Tattoo time! Note to self remember to bring cash for the tattoo man. I'm just getting the two that I didn't have time for last time I was there. These might be the last ones I get in Tulsa. Maybe not. Maybe I'll get something during the summer, but I don't really have plans for it. I figure I'll get most of the stuff I'm waiting on in Portland when I have an artist I know I'll be around for a while since it'll either be custom work or more involved in some way or other.
Anyway I need my sleep for that shit so goodnight!
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annoinferno · 19 days
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"More Traditional" (10.3.24)
Saw someone say something like "some people want to return to more traditional ways of living." What they were talking about was how they think anti-civilizationists aren't reactionaries and people should be allowed to want those "more traditional" ways of life.
Is something more traditional because more people do it, or because it is older, or because it is more codified? Is traditionality actually something we can talk about in comparative degrees of more or less?
Charitably what they mean is cultures who have been pushed through the violent sieve of colonialism should be able to return, and people should be able to go back to them. But I think it's just at modernist to present the old ways as better as it is to present the new way as better.
Then again, Spinozism is a modernism. The steady walk towards adequate intuitive knowledge of God suggests some pretty specific approaches to life. But then again we haven't even progressed to the development of many common notions yet, as "we do not know what the body can do." If we do not understand the body, we will not understand the affects, and without the affects under our feet we are going to get lost.
Regardless, you can commit any crime in the name of tradition, any crime but trying to make something new.
"More traditional." PFFFT. I wrote a version of this post I deleted because I realized that what set me off was their use of total nonsense phrasing, and the reactionary film clinging to it. More traditional is such a hollow buzzword you could play the drums on it. What they must mean is, of course, sustainable, well-proven, culturally significant, etc. ways of living. Tradition! Blow it out your ass.
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annoinferno · 20 days
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Ruffled (a fiction) (9.3.24)
Can't let that man through the gate, Captain will have my ass. Gotta stop him. Okay, bar the way with my sister. My spear. Why did I say sister. Stop thinking about Francine, gotta stop this guy. No way, sir, can't push your cart of shit through with my spear in your sister. Your way. Fucking hell it's humid out, I think I'm going to be sick. Tell him he can't pass. Nice. Why is he looking at me that way. "Why did you say I can't sister my way into the city?" he asked? I didn't sis that. Fuck. Tell him to stop being difficult. He's not getting it. Gesture menacingly. He didn't like that. He's not sister. He's not LEAVING. Oh good job, asshole, just shout the word leaving for no reason at him. This is a mess. Kick his cart of shit over. No wait, that would mean shit was right in front of me all day. Try to kick it down the path? Make it roll away? Can't step away from the gate to push it myself. We're at a standoff. Stab him? No, too soon. Ugh I wish it would cool down, it's hotter than sister today. Okay that was unacceptable of me. I need to get a grip. I need to kill this guy and his cart of literal shit in my way. Fertilize your own grave, jackass.
[this was going to be something different and then I made a typo that made me laugh so hard I had a new idea]
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annoinferno · 22 days
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Future Plans for this Blog (7.3.24)
Move to a real website. That's really it. When I do that I'll have to decide what gets brought over from here and what to do with the Tumblr side, but I'm increasingly wary of leaving this attached to a social media platform where I'm subject to controls I have no real way of interacting with.
I'd like to restart my old tarot series, as well, and maybe what I used to put on my side blogs that was basically media logging. Putting more pictures up would be nice, too.
A few difficulties: I'd want to password protect certain sections, so I'd need to figure that stuff out. I'd also need to think of a name, cuz I don't think I'll keep anno inferno in the future. I'm hoping to make something I can share a little more widely perhaps, and put what I can't share behind a password I'd give out to friends.
My arm hurts. It's better than it used to be but it hurts. Goodnight!
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annoinferno · 24 days
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Arm, Stress; Heli, Rage (5.3.24)
I saw my physical therapist for my shoulder pain, finally. She said it is fixable, and is mostly me storing stress as knots and such. She worked on it a fair bit and will give me exercises to do, and already it feels a lot better. I was certainly under a lot of stress between stuff with Mentos and grad school applications, though that was a rather extreme level of pain even for me. I'll be going back, and also getting a massage in a more relaxing environment later as well.
Speaking of Mentos, I was telling her about Isabel Fall and "I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter" and it turns out I still feel full level rage thinking about how that went down. Every time it starts coming up (and it's always me bringing it up because I love it) I wonder if I'll still be as angry as last time, and every time I am.
On the one hand this makes me really sad, because it means I cannot talk about or think about one of my favorite things without being angry at other people and depressed about its 'reception.' I wish I could enjoy the story like I did the first two times I read it.
On the other hand, at least I know my sense of good and bad isn't so easily eroded by time. With the way the world is now, the genocide of Palestinians rejected by every country in the world but my own and the one directly responsible, I worry that I will be worn down and stop caring enough sometimes. And true, I don't have enough energy to express my care a lot of days, but at least I know it is there. Every day I think about the guy at Thanksgiving who I overheard saying nasty, unshielded colonizer bullshit about Palestinians, and each time I regret that I did not denounce him on the spot.
I need more tattoos.
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annoinferno · 26 days
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A New Line to Cross (3.3.24)
I've been working on grad school applications some more. I need to change the courses, professors, and research referenced for each school, so today I looked up some profs at another school and tried to find their research.
First I had to discount all the adjunct faculty because they don't really represent the university as part timers. Then I had to discount all the emeritus faculty because it's hard to tell when they matter at all and when they're just hanging around. Find faculty who are full time, great, done.
Now look for ones with interesting focus areas. They don't all say where they focus, discount any with no hints in that direction, and any with areas of focus I don't care about.
Now look up the research for two I am interested by. Oh, one doesn't list her research work, okay, check libgen with her name. Read the most generic title as it is closest to the fundamentals, great, reference it.
Next one doesn't list her research either. Shit. Libgen doesn't have her work either, fuck. Okay, read her whole CV, find her publications down at the bottom, then look for a generic one in the massive pile. Now track down the book its in. Not on libgen. Not on private trackers. Amazon has it for 4$ but I'd have to wait. 40$ for the ebook version. Archive.org has the book, borrow it, strip the DRM, read her chapter, reference it, great.
At some point it felt like there was a thin line between research using publicly provided information and cyberstalking, even though I wasn't looking up anything about her. I don't think I came anywhere close to doing something wrong, but it felt very strange for a brief minute. I also felt proud that I was willing to go digging like that for a citation, that's good library work right there. In the future I'll probably have to go much, much deeper, but that was fun.
Also the reading I did was helpful! I enjoyed it.
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annoinferno · 27 days
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Crest (a fiction) (2.3.24)
Worn green carpet, like being on a giant billiard table. Air processed and tinny, stinging high up in the nose and making me want to sneeze but never letting me.
"Has there been a crime?" I asked.
"A murder," said... Marreu, according to records lookup on his face. He smiled in his ID photo, he wasn't supposed to do that.
"Then please undo the straps. I've taken the liberty to update your ID photo record as well, the last one was out of date." It had been recent.
He smiled and, hands shaky, undid the straps at my arms. Nervous, that's why he'd done it. A good lesson: never attribute to malice what can be explained by the human inability to comply with ship proto.
"Who died, when, where, how long has it been, who found it, did anyone touch it, and so on." People usually answered a one or two of these and rambled around the rest, I wouldn't get a full picture until interviews. "And please take me to the corpse."
Marreu said it was a young man named Lilac Candle. Lookup showed he had changed name once a year for a decade, gender twice. This would create difficulty in the interviews, some of the names were more common objects, such as Bulkhead, and one time it was Crest, my name. I let out a silent sigh, which is like farting from your mouth but not a belch, which is from your gut. Just an exhalation no one can hear.
[no clue]
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annoinferno · 28 days
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Test Tube Dumbass (a fiction) (1.3.24)
Jeremy sat in the exam room, where the last Jeremy had sat the day before, and the briefcase was open in front of him just as before and the grenade sat in the foam packing mold just as before. He picked it up, and turned it over, and held it up over his head. "I got it!" he said.
"Very good, Jeremy, now please try to disarm the grenade. If you pull the safety pin and twist the top, it will arm. If you instead push the pin all the way in, and turn the bottom, it will disarm. Please disarm it."
Jeremy got impatient halfway through and was fiddling with the pin in the grenade. Somehow he had rotated the pin itself, and when he tried to fix it, he dropped the grenade under the table and it went off. The explosion was not immediately fatal but an examiner shot him in the head upon realizing this while reviewing the scene.
"Why do they have to have ADHD. Can't we just use a regular low reasoning model?" she asked, flicking the safety back on her pistol.
"No," said her colleague, looking at the briefcase in the corner, somehow untouched. "We know children can't have grenades, and that there's no way to fool proof a high explosive if the user might hit it with a sharp rock for fun, but we need to fool proof it against, say, a cadet who is going to be drummed out soon enough, but preferably in one piece."
The first examiner stepped back outside the room and waited for her colleague to follow before pressing the button labeled PURGE, then the one labeled RESET. "I know, I know, but figuring this shit out is annoying. Did you see how he looked at me? He wasn't even mad, he was just surprised."
[what the military would do if they could clone Jerma]
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