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andreafmn · 9 days
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Kinktober ⛓ Day 31
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Word Count: 5.6K Paring:  Marauders!Sirius Black x Fem!Reader Prompt @kinktober2023: Costumes WARNINGS: SMUT 18+ (minors DNI), oral sex (female receiving), unprotected sex, p-in-v sex, semi-public sex
Summary: (Y/N) and Sirius have always had a playful relationship. Something the rest of the Marauders often tease them about. In all honesty, they do have feelings for each other, but can't seem to confess to one another. When Hogwarts announces a masquerade ball for Hallowe'en, each of them get different dates to make the other jealous. Will it work, or will it just drive them apart?
A/N: couldn't get the idea out of my head... so, yeahđŸ«ŁđŸ«Łand, yes I am still trying to finish Kinktober and Ficmas 😅😅
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“You really think Theresa is going to say yes?” (Y/N) teased. “She’s ignored you for the past six years. What makes you think she’ll say yes now?” 
“Well, she won’t be able to resist the charm of a masquerade ball during Hallowe’en,” Sirius countered. “No one will know who is who, and I think she’ll appreciate no one knowing she’s there with me. And I can use the night to woe her and win her over.”  
“You’ve always been delusional, Sirius,” she laughed. “But this definitely takes the cake.” 
“He hasn’t even asked her, and you’re already making fun of him, (Y/N)?” James chuckled as he sat between the two of them on the couch that lived in the Gryffindor common room. “Merlin, you two bicker more than an old married couple.”  
“I think they just need to snog and get it over with,” Remus joked. “This much animosity is normally just repressed sexual tension.” 
“Hilarious, Moony. But Padfoot here wishes he could snog me,” she said. “Unfortunately, I have something that’s called standards.” 
“Oh, you’d be lucky to even get near me, (Y/N),” Sirius countered. 
“I’m telling you,” Remus continued. “They just need to just get it out of the way and move on.” 
That had been the dynamic between Sirius and (Y/N) since they had met during their first year in the halls of the train. They teased and poked fun at each other, they pushed each other's buttons until one of them broke or the other Marauders stopped them. It was a game they had been playing for years on end, using it to camouflage what was lying beneath the surface. 
The only people who knew how the pair truly felt about each other were James and Remus, and they had kept it hidden all those years–even from each other. (Y/N) had confided in Remus, where Sirius had confessed to James after a drunken night visit to the Potter cottage. It was a secret they all carried between each other, but no one dared to admit. 
(Y/N) believed confessing her feelings would ruin a friendship she cherished, and Sirius was sure there was no way someone like her would ever want someone like him. So, rather than put each other out of their mutual misery, they danced around their feelings and simply fortified their friendship. And it was something they were planning to do until the end of time. 
Yet, that was something Remus and James weren’t going to allow. Even if they didn’t know it, they both had a similar plan to get them together that Halloween night. 
It had been a long time since the All Hallow’s Eve Feast had been a ball, and that year, it had been announced that the festivity was going to be a masquerade party. Whispers had traveled quickly regarding costumes and intricate masks, the entire student body excited about the upcoming event. 
A party at Hogwarts called for extracurricular activities late in the night. Lessons that weren’t included in their school curriculum. Even if professors were on high alert during those types of nights, it didn’t stop students from getting away with their schemes. They couldn’t be everywhere at all hours of the night, and the Marauders had just the right tool to help the students avoid any problems–it was easy to capitalize on desperation when they had created the map that would track every soul in the school. 
“So, what are your plans for the ball, (Y/N)?” Lily asked in the girl’s dorm later that week. “I heard Regulus was looking to ask you to be his date.” 
The name made the girl’s heart flutter. She had expected a certain Black brother to have asked her, and he had. It just wasn’t the right one. “I don’t know if I should,” (Y/N) sighed as she draped herself across Lily’s bed. “I mean, I guess he’d be a good date. Just not the one I wanted.” 
“Were you still waiting for Sirius to fess up?” the redhead teased. “I heard he asked Theresa.” 
“I know, and she said yes,” she whined. “Goes to show how much Lupin actually knows. Oh gods, why did I ever think he could like me back, Lils? I feel like an idiot.” 
“Oh, don’t be so hard on yourself. You can still go with a respectable Black brother,” Lily offered. “And you can use Regulus to make him jealous.”
“Like he will have his eyes on me,” she scoffed. “He’ll probably be too busy shoving his tongue down your best friend’s throat.” 
“Well, with that attitude, he won’t,” the Evans girl smirked. “He might be going to the ball with Theresa, but it doesn’t mean he has to leave with her. We’ll do your hair and your makeup, make sure you’re the most beautiful girl at the party. We’ll get you the most beautiful gown and the most striking mask. And I promise, by the end of the night, he’ll forget Theresa’s name.” 
“How can you be sure that he’ll even look at me long enough for that? He’s liked Theresa since first year.” 
“Believe me, (Y/N),” she grinned. “He’ll look.” 
And so, over the next couple of weeks, Lily set off to find (Y/N) the perfect dress. It had to be striking, command a room, and, most of all, make Sirius regret ever muttering Theresa’s name. 
As days passed, (Y/N)’s nerves only grew. Lily wouldn’t tell her a thing and Sirius had seemed to grow cold after she had agreed to be Regulus’ date. It certainly didn’t help when she had Remus telling her he was just jealous of his brother, and all she had to do was give time to time. Her friends seemed to have more faith in Sirius than she did. 
He had begun avoiding her everywhere they went, going out of his way to stay as far from her as he could, even changing seats with Remus in their shared classes so he didn’t have to sit next to her. It was infuriating and petrifying to know that all it took was one single party to destroy a years-long friendship. It made her thankful that she had never confessed her true feelings. That was a catastrophe she did not want to know. 
On October 31st, everyone was buzzing with excitement. The Great Hall had been decorated since breakfast, and professors had elected to hold only half-day classes to allow everyone enough time to prepare for the night’s festivities. Everyone was overjoyed—everyone but (Y/N). 
The girl couldn’t help but feel that her mood had dampened. It had been the longest time she’d passed without even writing to Sirius. She had even considered canceling with Regulus and staying in her dorm room, moping as everyone celebrated. But if there was one thing she knew, it was that Lily would not have allowed it—not when she had a plan.
“I already have everything for you, (Y/N),” Lily had whined. “All you have to do is get to our room.” 
“I just don’t see the point in all of this. Sirius clearly hates me so it won’t matter what I look like.”
“The money has already been spent,” the girl said, knowing it was the only reason that would get her friend to change her mind. “Are you really telling me that I spent all of that for nothing?” 
“I’ll get my parents to transfer the money. Just don’t make me embarrass myself with him.” 
“My darling (Y/N), you are going,” Lily commanded. “Even if it’s just to have fun with your other friends. I need you there.” 
“You’ll be there with James. He’ll be perfect company.” 
“You’re going,” she smiled. “That’s final.”
“I don’t like it when you’re bossy,” (Y/N) pouted. “You’re a bit scary.”
“Good,” Lily grinned. “Now, let’s get you into this beautiful gown.” 
And beautiful it was. It was a garment unlike anything she had ever seen, much less worn. The sparkling red dress hugged her in all the right places, fitting around her like it had been sewn onto her body. The fabric gave the illusion that she was revealing herself while covering her, and the sleeves made her feel delicate and regal. She was the vision of royalty. Had Lily gotten her a tiara, she was sure she would have been mistaken for a princess. 
“This is too much,” (Y/N) muttered as she stared at herself in the mirror. “This must have cost a fortune, Lils.”
“That is not what matters,” her friend reprimanded. “How do you feel? Do you like it?” 
“Like it? I bloody love it,” she exclaimed. “It’s the most gorgeous thing I’ve ever laid eyes upon. And I think it might be threading the line of the modest garment rule.” 
“Well, the rules don’t say anything about illusion fabric. You are technically fully covered,” Lily stated. “And what’s a little detention when you look like that?”
“You’ve really outdone yourself, Lils,” she smiled. “It’s perfect.” 
“It really is,” the redhead said as she hugged her friend from behind. “Now, let’s finish your hair and makeup to turn you into the true Gryffindor princess.” 
The room quickly becomes a mess of clothes and makeup as the girls all readied themselves for the night, all oohing and awing about (Y/N)’s dress. It was set to be the hit of the party. But all she cared about was what one specific boy thought. She would use the mask and the dress as her armor, and she’d suit herself with courage. After that night, she’d either grow closer to Sirius or finally drive them apart. 
Once Lily was done with (Y/N), she couldn’t recognize herself. Her gold lace mask highlighted the shimmer on her eyes, complimenting the bold red lip her friend had finished the makeup with. The red and gold accessories were the last touch to Lily’s masterpiece, completing the theme for her work of art. Everyone would know that the Gryffindor princess walked amongst them. 
“You’ve truly outdone yourself, Lily,” (Y/N) beamed. “I don’t think I’ve ever looked this good.” 
“I’m telling you, if Sirius doesn’t man up, I’m taking you home instead,” the girl teased. “James will just have to get over it. You look ravishing, my darling.” 
“You know what, even if he doesn’t, I’m going to enjoy tonight,” she stated. “Maybe I’ll even get a snog in or two.” 
“That’s the spirit, my friend,” Lily chuckled. “Now, let’s give everyone something to look at.” 
Arm in arm, the two girls left their dorm, knowing they were the only ones left in their tower. They had taken a few minutes extra to get ready to make sure that their late entry would turn heads. The plan was to draw everyone’s attention, and if they were the last ones there, there was no other choice but to look as the closed doors opened. 
Regulus and James were waiting outside of the common room door, annoyed already by the Fat Lady’s singing. But the second their eyes landed on the girls, they couldn’t help but think that it was worth the wait. 
“(Y/N), you look
” 
“Stunning. I know,” Lily smiled as she joined James’ side. “I do good work.” 
“I can’t believe it’s really you, (Y/N),” James teased. “I had a bet you’d probably show up in a jumper and jeans.” 
“Sorry to say you lost that bet, James,” she grinned. “Might as well live up to the name of Gryffindor princess, right? And you look handsome, Regulus. Very snake-like.” 
The boy wore his black hair slicked back, a snake-print mask tied around his head. His party robes were deep forest green with silver lines that made up scales on the jacket. He was fit to look like the prince of Slytherin, the direct opposite of who she was. 
“Thank you,” he said with a soft smile. “Shall we get to the ball then?” 
“We shall.”  
She took the boy’s outstretched arm, placing her hand on the crook of his elbow, and made the journey toward the Great Hall. There, the music was already in full swing, songs, and chatter filling the air. 
“Are you ready?” Lily asked as she turned toward her friend. “Everyone’s eyes are gonna be on you.” 
“I’m ready,” she smiled. “It’s now or never.” 
James and Lily took hold of the doors and pulled them open. The second they did, everything was just as Lily had anticipated. The music kept playing, but all the attention fell on (Y/N); even a spotlight somehow illuminated her the moment the doors opened. No one danced or moved; all they did was whisper and stare in amazement as Regulus led them toward the center of the dance floor. It was time for the traditional waltz, and what better couple to lead it than the best dressed of the night. 
As they made their way to the center of the room, (Y/N)’s eyes met grey ones looking right at her. Even with a mask that covered almost his entire face, she could make them out anywhere. His gaze never left hers, even as she danced with Regulus across the floor. He was dancing and talking with Theresa, but his eyes never left her. His stare burned into her, capturing every ounce of her attention. She had done all of this to have him look at her just like that, but as the minutes passed, it became too intense. 
Regulus and (Y/N) danced for almost ten songs straight before the boy offered to get them some punch, and Sirius had remained only a few feet away the entire time. Even after Theresa had said she was tired and wanted to sit, he remained close by, going as far as stealing Remus’ date, Sasha Monnet. She wanted to avoid his glare, be in the moment, but she couldn’t. No matter where she looked, there he was. 
“I can’t do this,” (Y/N) said to Lily as she got to their table, anxious and out of breath. “I’ve got to
 I need to
 I’m gonna go.” 
“What happened, darling? What’s wrong?” 
“I can’t keep pretending, Lils. It’s too much. I can’t do it.”
“Head up to our room then,” the girl offered. “I’ll be by in a bit to help you out. I’ll tell Regulus you weren’t feeling well.”
“Thank you, Lil
” (Y/N) was not able to finish her sentence as she noticed Sirius with Theresa out of the corner of her eye. They were talking; she couldn’t quite make out what they were saying, but it seemed intense. One second, they were speaking, and the next, the girl had crashed her lips onto his. The scene broke something inside of her (Y/N) didn’t think could be broken, but she knew she could not bear to keep watching. “I’ll see you later, Lils.” 
“Oh, darling,” was the last thing the girl heard her friend say before she was dashing out of the Hall and finding a place to catch her breath. 
Tears brimmed her eyes as she reached Gregory the Smarmy’s corridor, slipping into the secret passageway for some much-needed privacy. She couldn’t believe that she had deluded herself into thinking that the plan would have worked. Everything was set but for one vital step, and it was that Sirius seemingly did not reciprocate her feelings. That much was clear to her now. All she wanted was to rip the dress from her body, unpin her hair, wash her face, and cry the rest of the night away. She didn’t know why she had been cursed with her feelings, but she would make sure to break them one day. For now, she just wanted to wallow in her pity. 
But she wouldn’t be able to do that for long as the passage opened, revealing an out-of-breath Sirius. “Bloody hell, (Y/N)!” he exclaimed. Did you not hear me yelling out your name?” 
“Oh, sod off, Sirius,” she seethed, biting back the fresh tears that threatened to spill. “Just leave me alone like you have these past weeks. Clearly, you got what you wanted.”
“What are you talking about, (Y/N)?” 
“Please, Sirius, don’t play me for a fool,” the girl scoffed. “Ever since this stupid dance was announced, you have made it your mission to stay away from me. If you didn’t want me around after Theresa agreed to be your date, you could have just told me. Instead, you thought it was best just to push me out. Fine. I get the hint, Sirius. You can go back and enjoy your new girlfriend.” 
“Are you seriously that demented?” 
“Wow,” she interjected. “Really?” 
“You really think this is about Theresa?” Sirius said, his tone full of surprise. “This is about you, (Y/N). It’s always been about you.” 
“What are you talking about, Sirius?” 
“You’re seriously daft, (Y/N),” he chuckled in amazement. “I only asked Theresa to the ball after you said yes to my own brother. To Regulus, (Y/N).” 
“I only did that after Theresa had said you had asked her
 and what does it matter? You were always going to ask her.” 
“That’s not true.” 
“Yes, it is, Sirius!” she exclaimed, tears falling down her cheeks. “She’s the only girl you’ve ever talked about since first year. It’s always Theresa this, Theresa that. You finally got your wish. So, please, don’t fault me in this situation.” 
“You don’t get it, (Y/N),” he sighed, running his hands across his face in frustration. “Theresa has only been a distraction to the truth. She’s never been the girl I’ve wanted, but she was a good distraction.” 
“A distraction from what, Sirius? Just speak clearly for once. No riddles, no beating around the bush. Just tell me.” 
“She was a distraction from you, (Y/N). You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted but could never have,” he confessed. “I couldn’t tell you because I knew you didn’t feel the same way, so it became easier to talk about Theresa when really I was talking about you. When I heard you said yes to Regulus, I went mad. I mean, I’ve seen you with other guys, but my own brother? Now, that was too much to handle. Then you walk in looking so bloody exquisite, and you’re on his arm, and all I wanted was to punch the living daylights out of him–more than usual. And I can’t go on like this, (Y/N). I needed you to at least know that I am crazy about you. I always have been.” 
“You’ve got to be joking, right?” the girl laughed in disbelief. “This is crazy.” 
“What is wrong with you, (Y/N)?” Sirius said, shock evident on his face. “If you don’t feel the same you just had to say that. You didn’t have to make fun of me for it.” 
It took (Y/N) a few seconds for her laughter to die down–it was an unfortunate reaction to a surprising admission. And, if she had to admit, serious situations always made her break out in a laugh. “No, it’s not,” she stammered out the last chuckles. “I wasn’t making fun of you. I couldn’t when I’ve felt the same way the entire time. The only reason I agreed to go with Regulus to the ball was because you had asked Theresa, and, if I’m honest, I wanted to make you jealous. Remus had heard that he was going to ask me after Theresa had told Sasha you had asked her, and he thought I could make you mad by going with him. “Then Lily came up with this whole attire to make you see what you were missing,” she continued as she looked over her gown. “And well, it seemed like the perfect plan until a few minutes ago when you were snogging Theresa. I couldn’t handle watching you two, so I ran away. I was sort of on my way to the dorms to wallow in self-pity, but I took a detour to this place.” 
“Well, it is the place we hide in when the others get too much,” Sirius smiled softly. He crossed the distance between them, pressing the girl against the cold wall. “So, what I’m hearing is that we’ve been skirting around each other for no reason? I mean, James always told me to go for it, but I never really listened to him.” 
“Remus pushed me to do the same, but I didn’t want to ruin what we had,” she admitted before moving her head from the hand that reached for her cheek. “But that doesn’t explain the kiss you just shared with Theresa. If you really liked me, why did you kiss her?”  
“She kissed me,” the boy said. She was angry that I hadn’t really paid attention to her since you came into the Hall. Granted, she was right. And when I was in the middle of telling her that I wasn’t interested in her, she decided to kiss me. But I pushed her away, and that’s when I saw you running away. Lily had some choice words about it, and James gave me the map to find you. I promise you, Theresa is the last person wanted to spend tonight with. I guess I wanted to make you jealous, too, and it all backfired.”
“We’re not good at this whole honesty thing, huh?” (Y/N) chuckled. “Next time, promise me we’ll just talk things out.”
“I hope there won’t be a next time of this,” Sirius whispered as he brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Now that I’ve got you, I’m not planning on letting you go, darling.”  
The atmosphere around them had changed. No longer was there an agonizing tension between them. Instead, a hot air engulfed them in the cold corridor, burning something inside them that had been growing for the past six years. “Is that a threat or a promise, Padfoot?” she teased, running her fingers across the canine mask he wore. “A little on the nose, don’t you think, pup?”  
“Nothing like what you’re wearing, princess,” he smirked. “Never thought I’d ever get this close to royalty.”
“Well, if you play your cards right, you might just shag your first princess,” she teased. “How about we start with a kiss? I’ve only been waiting for six years.”
“Your wish is my command, your highness,” Sirius grinned. “Now come here.”
Sirius placed his hands on either side of her face and crashed their lips together, ignoring the sting of the mask as it dug into his face. All he cared about was the warm feeling of her mouth on his, the plumpness of her lips, and the minty taste of her tongue. It was everything he had dreamed of and more. He had not expected how perfectly their mouths fit together or how soft the skin of her lips would be, and he’d definitely not expected it ever to happen–not with her. 
Their hands explored each other’s bodies through their clothes as their kiss grew more heated, learning every nook and cranny they had devoid themselves from touching for many years. They had always been touchy during their friendship, always finding reasons to hold hands, hug, or simply have a closeness they didn’t share with anyone else. Both of them believed that was as far as they would ever go. Maybe if they had cared for Divination, they would have seen that their futures were meant to intersect as more than just friends. 
“Take off my dress already, Si,” she moaned as Sirius’ mouth traveled down her neck. “I don’t wanna wait.” 
“The dress is actually doing something for me,” he groaned against her skin. “Ain’t nothing like fucking royalty.” 
“Didn’t know you were into costumes, Sirius?” (Y/N) teased as she swallowed another moan. “I’ll keep that in my back pocket.” 
“What can I say? I’m really into the whole Beauty and Beast thing,” he chuckled darkly. “And this beast plans to ride this beauty all night long.” 
In a swift movement, Sirius flipped the girl over, pressing her chest against the cold stone of the passageway. He kissed his way up and down her neck, savoring the taste of her skin before landing on the softness of her ear. He took the lobe between his teeth, tugging it softly, earning a guttural whine from (Y/N).  
“You’re such a tease, Sirius,” she mewled. “Just get on with it.” 
“Needy. Aren’t you, princess?” he chuckled between kisses to her shoulders. “Can’t even wait a bloody second.” 
“I’ve waited six bloody years, Padfoot. So, no. I can’t wait a second more.” 
“How could I ever deny you that?” Sirius grabbed the hem of her dress, pulling it up to her waist, exposing her entire bottom half. “No underwear? How cheeky, my lady.”
“This gown doesn’t forgive undergarment lines,” she panted. “I wasn’t planning on something like this.”
“Is that why you’re absolutely drenched?” he teased as he knelt behind her. “Because you are dripping, princess.”
Before she could say another word, Sirius attached his mouth to her heat, running his tongue through the length of her cunt. He explored her folds and savored her taste, sighing as she coated his mouth. She was an amortentia potion come to life. If someone had told him that’s what he drank, he would not have corrected them. (Y/N) was intoxicating and every bit the woman he most loved. 
He worked her expertly. With the tip of his tongue, he flicked and circled her clit, sending shockwaves through her body. Sirius lapped and sucked, focusing on the tiny bundle of nerves before slipping a finger into her. 
“Oh, fuck,” she keened as she met his thrusts. “That feels so fucking good.”
“And to think
”
“Don’t talk,” she interrupted as she pushed his head back onto her core. “Just make me cum.”
He chuckled against her, getting back to work as she commanded. Sirius pistoned his finger at a quick pace, adding another and curling them at the ends as his mouth continued its assault. He thrust into her until he felt her walls clenching around his digits, and her mouth let out a pleasurable wail. As she came down, he drank her like she was the elixir of life. He had been walking a shell of a man until that very moment.
“I need more, Sirius,” she panted. “I need to feel you inside me, now.”
“You really are needy, princess,” he chuckled as he sucked her essence from his fingers. “But who am I to deny you such a pleasant request?” 
From behind her, she heard Sirius undo the zipper from his trousers, followed by a tight grip on her left hip. The head of his cock pressed against her entrance at first before running the trail his tongue had. It separated her folds and teased her clit, anticipating what was to come.
“Are you ready, my princess?” he whispered, this time without his usual joking tone. “I wanna make sure you really want this. That you want
 me.”
(Y/N) couldn’t help but turn at the sound of Sirius’ voice breaking. Even after what she had allowed him to do to her, he still doubted that she wanted him. “Why would you think that I wouldn’t?” she questioned as she cradled his face tenderly. “I thought you understood just how much you mean to me, Si.”
“I just don’t want you to feel like you’ve made a mistake with me,” he answered meekly. “I may have been jealous, but Regulus might be the best choice for you in the end. I’ve no family, no money, no titles as of now. Your family will be beside themselves if they even hear a whisper that you’re with me.”
“Do you take me for an elitist pure-blood, Sirius? I thought you knew me better than that,” she chastised lovingly. Stray tears had fallen out of the corner of his eyes, which she promptly wiped away with the pad of her thumb. “I could not care any less about status, darling, because I didn’t fall for any of those things. I fell for your intelligence, your charm, your wit, your smile—and, of course, your dazzling good looks. There’s no one on this earth that I want more than I want you, Sirius. And I will prove it.”
She wrapped a hand softly around his length, pumping it slowly as she caressed her slit with the head. “I want you, Sirius,” she moaned. “I want all of you.”
(Y/N) took off her heels to lower her height, sinking into his length. She winced softly at the intrusion, the overwhelming stretch quickly becoming a pleasurable sting. Her arms wrapped around his neck, finding her legs turn to jelly as the feeling overtook her. 
“Oh, Merlin,” Sirius groaned as he threw his head back in pleasure. “You feel so perfect around me, princess. So fucking perfect.”  
“I think
 I think you can move now, Si,” the girl muttered. “I need you to move.”  
“You don’t have to tell me twice, darling.”  
Sirius took back control of the moment, wrapping an arm around her waist and moving his hips to thrust inside her at a slowly increasing pace. He slid into her wetness, slicking his length with her essence and gliding in and out of her as he tasted the skin of her neck. A moan fell out of his throat as (Y/N)’s fingers dug into her hair, pulling at the strands as he continued his attack. 
The boy didn’t want to wake if this was simply another one of his very vivid dreams. And if he had been cursed or drank a potion, he’d beg whoever had done so to never again let him live without it. He had everything he had ever wanted in his hands and did not want to know a world in which he did not have it anymore. 
He could have never imagined that the girl he had been in love with for the better part of his life actually wanted him back. The Black boy didn’t feel like he deserved someone like (Y/N), and he probably never would. But at that moment, they were equals—just a boy and a girl surrendering themselves to the most natural feeling that could ever grow between them. There were no duties to fulfill, no families to answer to, only them and their emotions. 
“I’m close, princess,” he moaned into her ear. “You feel so bloody good.”  
“I’m right behind you, darling,” she muttered. “I don’t think I could hold on for much longer.”  
“Let yourself go, princess,” he told her as he slid a hand between them and circled her clit with his fingers. She clutched onto him tighter as pleasure spiraled through her body, pulling at his hair like it was the only thing keeping her tethered to reality. “Go on, love, cum for me.”  
With a few more strokes and a few more circles, (Y/N) let herself go around Sirius, finding his mouth with her to drown the moaning yell she let out. He tasted of butterbeer and her essence, and she wasn’t sure if the taste was better now or before. But the feeling of warmth that came from him was enough for her not to care. She had spent enough time dreaming of this very moment, and there was nothing that could make that instance less than perfect. 
“Oi, ya’ cheeky buggers!” Except for James’ loud mouth from the other side of the passage. “You can keep shagging later, but I need the bloody map.” 
Before they could answer, Sirius burst inside the girl, his groan drowned out by (Y/N)’s lips. His fingers dug into her skin, his breath hitching in his chest. “That bloody wanker,” Sirius managed to groan out. “He’s truly got spectacular timing.”  
“At least you were able to finish,” she chuckled teasingly. “Looks like Prongs has quite good time estimating powers.”  
“He said I could have the map for the rest of the night,” Sirius grumbled as he slid out of (Y/N) with a low groan, already missing her warmth. “We should be enjoying tonight together, not worrying about getting caught.”  
“Just think how many nights like these we’ll be able to have now,” she grinned, tenderly caressing his cheek. “Now that we don’t have to pretend that we’re drooling for each other.”  
“But how many nights do we get where you’re literally dressed like a princess?” the boy teased. “This is a costume that you won’t recreate again.”  
“Tell you what, I might not use this dress for this again,” she grinned, “but any time you want to shag a princess, just let me know. Promise I’ll get a costume from Hogsmeade the next time we’re out.”  
“We could always get other costumes, too,” he added sheepishly but dripping with hope. “Just to have diversity, you know?” 
“Didn’t take you for liking costume play, darling,” (Y/N) smiled curiously. “I think this might be one of the most interesting things I’ve learned about you. All I ask is that the next costume doesn’t involve masks. I think I’ve lost all feeling in my cheeks from this thing.”  
“Unmasked sex? Don’t see why not,” he chuckled before James yelled out once more. “Guess we should go then.” 
“Well, we do have dates at the ball we must get back to,” she poked. “Regulus must be wondering where I’ve gone to.” 
“Don’t even joke about that.” 
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andreafmn · 15 days
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Girl are you doing okay? We havent heard from you in awhile 😭😳
omg, I'm good! I've just been really busy with my kitty Olivia and basically cleaning and cooking and my health and all that, and have had almost no time to write 😅 but updates are coming soon!
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andreafmn · 15 days
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Speak | Chapter 25
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Word Count: 5.2 K
Summary: Bella Swan was a disaster when Edward had left. Deciding she needed a little help, Charlie Swan receives with open arms his younger daughter (Y/N) Swan. She helps Bella during her depression and becomes inseparable from her long-lost friend Jacob. What she didn’t expect was falling for a hotheaded short-tempered silver wolf.
A/N: okay, y'all, I'm back and very late, I know. I've been dealing with my new baby kitten and have almost no time to write, but here's the long awaited confrontation. Hope y'all like that it's a bit of a long one 💖💖 TAGLIST CLOSED 
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“I’m gonna kill him,” Paul seethed, his hand closing into a tight fist. “I don’t care about being a pack brothers or whatever bullshit. I’m gonna fucking kill him.”
The boy was enraged. His brain had fogged with ire, and his veins ran hot with unrest. But unlike the anger that overtook him before a shift, this one was cold and calculating. It made his senses sharp, pointed. He wanted vengeance. He wanted payback. Most of all, he wanted to fight in (Y/N)’s honor.
But before he had stepped out of the house, he had no idea he would feel that way.
“We gotta talk to you, Paul,” Jared said, his usual joking aura long gone. “It’s, uh, it’s serious.”
“What happened?”
“It’s something to do with Jake,” he grimaced before continuing, “and (Y/N). About last night.”
“Did the vampire come back?” (Y/N) worried, squeezing Paul’s hand tightly as her heart raced. “Did she attack him?”
“Oh no,” Embry said angrily. “But Paul just might.”
“Why don’t we go outside, Paul?” Sam feted. “(Y/N) can stay here for a bit before you take her back home.”
“No, I wanna know. If it has something to do with Jake and me, I have a right to know.”
“She stays,” the boy said. “No more secrets. We’re doing the honesty thing.”
“Right,” she smiled. “The honesty thing.”
“Okay, then,” the alpha sighed. “But this is a very sensitive topic, and I’m gonna need you to stay levelheaded here, Paul. We’ve had enough tragedies happen, one right after the other. I don’t think we could take one more.”
“You’re scaring me, Sam,” (Y/N) said. “What happened?”
“I’ll let veg tell you since he’s the one that witnessed it.”
The younger wolf stepped in front as Sam motioned him to do so, his cheeks growing red as everyone’s eyes turned to him. What he had to say was not easy; everyone knew that. Jacob was his best friend, and speaking I’ll about him was a betrayal like no other. But if had to be done. Something had to be done.
“Okay, so we’ve all seen firsthand how good Jake is at hiding his thoughts when we’re in wolf form,” Embry started, fiddling with his thumbs to avoid looking directly at anyone. “Like, he’s unnaturally good at this whole wolf stuff.”
“We get it, El. Or best friend is the best at this,” Paul complained. “Get to the point,”
“Yes. Okay. Sorry,” he stammered. “Well, we were out on our shift this morning before the funeral, and I could tell something wasn’t quite right with him when we met up. I just thought he was sad about Harry. But a few minutes into our run, he let a memory slip though, about last night, and what went down with (Y/N) and Victoria.
“After he left Bella at her hip use, he ran back to our side of the woods,” he continued. “That’s where he came upon the vampire and you, (Y/N).”
“No, Embry. Jake wasn’t there,” the girl said confused. “I only saw Victoria and Paul.”
“He was there,” Embry restated, shaking his head. “He saw Victoria attack you and stayed hidden behind some trees. He thought
 I shouldn’t.”
“Don’t you dare hold back, Embry,” Paul ordered through gritted teeth. What the hell did Jacob think?”
“Gods, this is horrible,” the younger boy worried. “He thought if (Y/N) got hurt or
 or worse, that Bella would seek comfort in him and finally forget about the vampires.”
“You better not be saying what I think you’re saying, Embry.”
“I’m sorry, Paul. But, yes. Jacob thought that if (Y/N) died, it would send Bella right into his arms. So, he hid and watched as Victoria attacked. He left when you were taking her here,” he admitted sheepishly, as though he had been the one to commit the wrongdoing. His face had grown bright red, and she was sure she could see his chest rising and falling at an unnatural pace. “I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I never thought
 I can’t even believe he would do something so despicable.”
“I’m gonna kill him,” Paul seethed, his hand closing into a tight fist. “I don’t care about being a pack brothers or whatever bullshit. I’m gonna fucking kill him.”
“No, you’re not,” (Y/N)said, her voice wavering slightly as she tried her best to hold her composure. It won’t change what he did—or what I guess he didn’t do.”
“He was going to let you die, (Y/N),” Paul whispered softly. “He wanted you to die without getting his hands dirty. There’s no excuse for that.”
“I’m not excusing his behavior. God knows I’ve done enough of that already,” she sighed as she tightened her grip on the hand that had yet to leave hers. “I’m simply just done with Jacob. I don’t wanna hear more of his excuses and warped reasonings. I’m just done.
I never thought I’d say this, but I almost died yesterday,” she chuckled incredulously. “I could have died I could have died because of that vampire last night if it hadn’t been for you. But I also could have died that morning trying to save Bella. I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive him, but I sure as hell don’t want anything to do with him right now.”
“I’m not gonna really kill him,” Paul said, his voice softening as his gaze fell onto her eyes. “But he can’t get away without at least a beat down. He’ll heal quickly, unfortunately. I just can’t let him think that everything he’s done to you can go unpunished.”
“It’s really not worth it,” she shrugged. “He’s not worth it.”
“Something has to be done,” he restated. “What are you going to do, Sam?”
“I don’t
 this is an unprecedented situation, Paul. He technically hasn’t broken any rules, but I do agree he has to be punished. I’m just not sure what that looks like.”
But though he didn’t say a thing, Sam sent Paul a stare that the boy quickly understood. There was resolution in both of their gazes. Something had to be done, and something would be done. “Keep (Y/N) away,” Paul told his alpha. I’ll be back soon.”
“Wait, where are you going?” (Y/N) questioned as he went to let go of her hand. “Please don’t go pick a fight with him.”
“Just stay here,” he softened. “I’ll be back later to take you home.”
“Paul
”
“I have to go do this, (Y/N),” Paul assured, cradling her face tenderly. I’ve been more than calm when it comes to him. But he’s crossed a line, and I’m not gonna let it stand—not when it means I could have lost you.”
“Fighting with him won’t change anything, Paul,” she continued. “You could get hurt.”
“This is long overdue, (Y/N). And it’s happening.”
Before she could say anything else, Paul kissed her forehead and took off on a run. He sped down the street before anyone could stop him. His limbs took him flying toward the well-known red cabin while he prepared himself for the confrontation of a lifetime.
Paul knew that it was the worst day possible for a reckoning. With Harry Clearwater’s passing, the entire community was down and reeling from a massive loss. Billy Black would definitely be surprised to see him at his house, but not another second could pass where Jacob thought he could get away with what he had done. He would pay for every single action he took against (Y/N). He would pay for even thinking of hurting her. Paul would make sure Jacob regretted the second he had decided to hurt the Swan girl.
Soon enough, the house came into view, and Paul’s blood boiled. Only the living room light was on, and he prayed to the gods that Billy wasn’t home yet. The man had no fault in his son’s wrongdoing, and the last thing he wanted was to cause the chief more heartache. Still, he had to do what needed to be done—what should have been done months before.
Once he reached the front door, his fist pounded on the wood, his voice echoing Jacob’s name loudly and thunderously. Anyone down the street would be able to hear him, but he didn’t care. Nothing mattered more than what he was going to do.
“Paul,” Billy said Ashe opened the door. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“I need to talk to your son, Billy. And I’m sorry, but this has nothing to do with you.”
“If it’s about Jacob, it has everything to do with me,” the man responded. “What has he done now?”
“Why don’t you ask him?” Paul said as he saw Jacob slowly walking toward his father and packmate. “Why don’t you ask Jacob what he was doing last night, Billy?”
The man’s head snapped backward, his eyes falling on the petrified expression on his son’s face. The guilt was plastered on thickly, and it was hard not to notice he had done something bad enough to regret. “What did you do, Jacob?”
“I didn’t do anything,” the boy said. “Why do you think I did something, dad? Shouldn’t you be on my side?”
“I didn’t even know there were dudes to choose from, boy. But your face has done enough to tell me that you have done something. We just have to determine how forgivable it can be. It’s not like you’ve been making the best decisions lately.”
“Should you tell him, or should I?” Paul spat. Either way, everyone’s going to know the truth—even your precious Bella. What do you think she’ll think about you once she knows what you did?”
“Don’t you fucking talk about her.”
“Jacob!” Billy exclaimed. “I demand you tell me right now what Paul is talking about. I’ve had enough heartache today, and I do not want to add to the distaste. You tell me right now, Jacob.”
“It’s not what you think, dad,” Jake groveled. “He’s just blowing things out of proportion. I swear on mom’s grave, I didn’t do anything.”
“Don’t you dare do that, son. Do not tarnish your mother’s resting place in that way.”
“Tell him, Jacob,” Paul pushed. “Tell him what could’ve happened to (Y/N) last night if it had been up to you.”
At the sound of the girl’s name, Billy’s eyes went wide. He understood that the dispute was regarding the girl, but the more Paul pushed, the worse he knew his son had acted. With the confirmation that it involved (Y/N), he was becoming resolute that Jake may have done something unforgivable. “Jacob, if there is any chance for forgiveness, you better come clean now.”
“I don’t
 I didn’t
”
“What? Vamp got your tongue, Jake?”
“Shut up, Paul.”
“Tell him, Jake. Tell your dad what you were gonna let happen last night.”
The second Paul disappeared down the road, (Y/N) went into a frenzy. She begged Sam to stop him and told Jared to go after him, but no one would budge. They all told her it simply had to be done. Whatever went down between the two boys had to happen.
But (Y/N) couldn’t fathom either of them getting hurt because of her. Sure, Jacob deserved a little pain, but she couldn’t help wishing no ill will toward him. Even if he had been an absolute monster the past three months, he had still been her friend for many years before that, and a part of her would always worry for that boy she knew.
As for Paul, worry was laced into every thought of him. She didn’t even want to imagine what harm could come to him at Jacob's hands, especially because of her. Her head was a mess, and her feelings were all jumbled, but she was sure that the last thing she wanted was for Paul to get hurt.
The second she had found Paul’s keys—the purple bracelet giving them away—she snatched them from the table and ran outside, but Sam and Jared were quick to block her way. “Let me through,” she said. “I need to stop this.”
“They need to do this, (Y/N),” Sam said. “The only thing you’re going to do by going there is get hurt. You’ve already had enough of that.”
“I can’t just sit by and let them hurt each other, Sam,” she exclaimed. “They are two of the most stubborn people I have ever met. This could easily end in blood.”
“They’ll heal,” Jared retorted. “It’s like Paul said, (Y/N). This has been a long time coming.”
“I don’t think you really understand what’s happening,” Embry interjected as he joined the other boys. “Jacob was ready to let you die last night, (Y/N). He would have committed one of the betrayals a pack brother can do, and that’s harming an imprint.”
“This is just another stupid mistake that Jacob made,” Sam continued. “This was a calculated decision that could have ended badly.”
“You’re their alpha, Sam. You’re supposed to make sure things like these don’t happen between them.”
“Right now, I have bigger things to deal with than those two,” he sighed. “I can’t tell you what to do, (Y/N). If you wanna go, then go. But I’m telling you, this is gonna happen whether you want it to or not.”
“I have to do what I can,” she responded as she jumped into the driver’s seat of Paul’s truck. “Before they do something they might regret.”
“I’ll go with her,” Embry offered. “If things get too out of hand, I can get in the middle.”
“Fine,” Sam relented, knowing there was nothing he could do to drop (Y/N). “Just make sure she doesn’t get close to them.”
“I will,” Embry assured, slipping into the truck. "She won’t get hurt.”
In a matter of seconds, (Y/N) was speeding down the road and heading toward the red cabin, praying to whatever was out there that the two boys had kept their cool for long enough. She knew everyone was reeling. Not just because of what had happened to her but because Harry Clearwater had passed. It was a moment of high levels of stress and a fight was the last thing anyone needed.
(Y/N) didn’t really understand her need to protect them both. At least not completely. She should have wanted the vindication that came from someone finally putting Jacob in his place, but there was a part of her, a small part, that simply wanted to move on and forget that part of her life. But there was still the part that wanted the boy she had loved to be safe. No amount of retaliation would ever replace everything she had already given him.
At the Black residence, Billy, Jacob, and Paul were engaged in a heated argument. (Y/N) couldn’t hear it, but she knew what it was. Before giving it another thought, she jumped out of the truck and ran toward them, ignoring the searing pain that shot through her ankle and Embry yelling her name.
“Tell him, Jake,” Paul said, his gaze burning a hole in Jake’s head. “Tell your dad what you were gonna let happen last night.”
“Don’t,” (Y/N) blurted before she could stop herself. “It won’t do anyone any good.”
“(Y/N), look at the state of you,” Billy gasped. Her arms were covered in cuts and bruises, and her neck sported a darkening bruise in the shape of a hand. The man took in every visible wound before turning his head toward his son. “Did you do this, Jacob? Did you hurt (Y/N)?”
“No! What the hell, dad?!” he questioned defensively. “How could you think that?”
“But you could have prevented it,” Paul seethed. “But you didn’t want to, did you, Jake?”
“You better tell me the truth this instant, boy,” the older man fumed. “I’ve had just about enough of your excuses. What happened last night, Jacob?”
“I-I-I
”
“Speak up!”
“I almost died,” (Y/N) responded quickly. “Last night, the vampire that’s been hunting Bella found me, and she almost killed me. Left me with some pretty nasty wounds as a reminder.”
“And what about Jacob, (Y/N)? Please just tell me.”
“He didn’t
 I didn’t
”
“He saw her long before we did,” Paul said, anger spewing from every word he spoke. “He saw her with the bloodsucker, and he was going to let her die. All because he wanted Bella to run back to him. Your son was going to let (Y/N) die so that her sister was so heartbroken she would find solace in him.”
“That’s not true, dad!” Jacob defended. “How could you say that?”
“It is true,” Embry sheepishly interjected. “You let the memory slip this morning during our shift. You saw everything that the vampire was doing, and you did nothing. You wanted her to die, Jake.”
“What the fuck, Em? You’re supposed to be my friend.”
“I’m not going to lie for you, Jake,” the boy assured. “Not when it comes to someone’s life.”
Jacob took a step closer to Embry, anger clear on his features, but his father rolled into his path, his face matching in anger. “You were going to let her die, Jacob?” Billy interjected. “Do you have any idea how deplorable that is? And to someone you supposedly loved once upon a time.”
“Dad, it wasn’t like that,” he whined. “They’re blowing things out of proportion. I just
 I froze.” 
“You didn’t, Jake,” Embry corrected. “I heard your thoughts, and they were unforgivable.”
“Shut up, Embry!” Jacob raised his fist, headed straight for his friend’s face, but Paul’s hand stopped it. The older boy pushed him back, making him stumble in his step. “You don’t want to pick another fight with me, Paul. Remember how the last one ended?”
And how could he not remember? He had reeled from the pain for weeks, knowing that not only had he hurt (Y/N) but that she was back in Jacob’s arms. But this time was different. Paul was different, and so was she. He had finally said the truth, and she had heard it. All they needed now was time and maybe a dash of retaliation.
“Don’t push your luck, Jacob,” Paul said through gritted teeth as he squared up with the boy. “The only reason I haven’t bashed your head in is because (Y/N) doesn’t want me to hurt you.” 
“Look at that,” he snickered before whispering so low only Paul could have heard it, “even after all I’ve done, she cares more about my well-being than even her own.”
That did it. Paul’s hand recoiled before colliding with a loud snap with Jacob’s jaw. The hit made the younger boy lose his balance, and he tumbled to the ground with a surprised expression. But it didn’t take long before he was up again and lunging for Paul. There were punches thrown, kicks, drags, and pushes. Every collision of limbs resounded across the yard, thundering into the woods beyond. It was a messily choreographed dance where both boys were fighting for dominance. Well, Paul was fighting for something he knew mattered much more than a measly win. He was fighting for (Y/N) and everything she had lost because of Jake.
But (Y/N) could not handle the scene unfolding before her. Where the boys were focused on besting the other, all the girl could see was the forming red marks, the dripping blood, and the shredded clothes. All she could see was hurt and pain and everything she was tired of experiencing. She begged for them to stop, her voice growing hoarse as they continued to tumble farther away. She tried to run after them, but both Embry and Billy stopped her.
“It’s your son, Billy,” (Y/N) cried. “Aren’t you gonna do something about it?”
“You have too forgiving a soul, dear (Y/N),” he said sternly. “That boy needs a firm punishment that only Paul can impart. This needs to happen. My son has made his choices, however despicable they may be, and he had to face his consequences.”
“But I’m fine. I’m here. I’m alive,” she exclaimed. “They’re just gonna get hurt. You have to stop them, Billy.”
“I cannot, (Y/N). They’ll stop when they need to,” he shrugged as he took the girl’s hand in his. “But this must happen. This is the reckoning he had won for himself. Maybe Paul will finally knock some sense into that boy, and I’ll get back the son I knew.”
“But
”
“Let it go, (Y/N),” Embry said. “This is happening. They’ll fight, get hurt, and heal.”
Before her very eyes, the brawling boys transformed into massive wolves, ripping away their clothes and their skin. They snarled and nipped, trying their best to instill the deepest wound. One second, Jacob was dominating, bashing the other wolf into the ground. He growled and bit his back leg, trying his hardest to end the attack. But the next, it was Paul who was pouncing on the russet-brown wolf, dragging him through the grass by his scruff. Jake thrashed and barked, his limbs thrashing as he tried to break free. Their furs matted together with crimson red stains, signaling every part their teeth had been able to sink into.
But (Y/N) was restless. As she watched the boys hurl each other across the ground, she couldn’t keep still. She could not simply stand there and watch as they continued to hurt each other for her sake.
The girl slipped out of Billy’s grip and ignored his calls as she ran toward the animals. “Stop!” she cried out. “Just stop! It’s enough!”
Paul’s head snapped toward her, worry evident in his wolf’s eyes because of her closeness. He whined toward her, begging her to go back to safety, but she didn’t budge. At that moment, as the silver-furred wolf turned his entire attention to (Y/N), Jacob sprung from the ground and pounced on the boy, sinking his fangs into Paul’s shoulder.
“No!” (Y/N) shrieked as Paul wailed a painful howl. “Let him go!”
Yet all Jacob did was bite down harder, making it impossible for Paul to move. He held the older boy’s leg in his mouth, allowing the red liquid to stain his fur, growling as he stared at the girl. But his victory did not last long as a grey wolf jumped from behind her and crashed his head into Jacob’s ribs, knocking the wind out of him and making him release Paul.
As soon as he was free, the silver canine slowly transitioned back into a human, revealing a curled-up and pained Paul Lahote. (Y/N) quickly ran toward the boy, taking her jacket off and draping it across his legs, tears quickly falling from her eyes. “Oh god, Paul,” she sobbed, pressing a hand on his oozing wound. “What do I do? What can I do?”
Her hand came up red and drenched in blood, making her shudder. “I’m fine,” Paul groaned as he struggled to get up. “Well, I’ll be fine.”
“You’re bleeding, Paul. Because of me,” she said. “This is the last thing I wanted. I didn’t want you to get hurt.”
“It’s not your fault, (Y/N),” he smiled, his eyes softening as they landed on hers. “And it’ll take time, but I’ll heal.”
“I should have listened. I should have stayed away. I
” 
“I knew what I was doing, (Y/N),” he said. His unharmed hand reached up to cradle her cheek, wiping away the tears with his thumb. “And I would have done it a million times again because you deserve someone that would fight for you.”
“I’d rather have you be okay,” she whimpered, leaning into the warmth of his touch. “We gotta get you inside and clean that wound up. Why isn’t it healing fast?”
“Wounds by other supernaturals take a bit longer to heal,” he replied. “And I can’t really go inside right now.”
“You can’t stay here either, Paul,” she argued. “Embry already took Jake away into the woods. The fight is over.”
“Yeah, but I’m also naked under this tiny jacket, and I’m not sure I wanna expose myself just yet.”
Before (Y/N) could say anything else—not that her beet-red cheeks hadn’t said enough—Billy rolled down the pathway, a blanket, and a towel on his lap. “Wrap the towel around his shoulder, (Y/N),” he instructed. “I’ll give you some clothes once we’re inside.”
The girl did as instructed before helping Paul to his feet. The sheet dragged across the ground and barely covered his chest, and pain shot through every part of his body. He could feel every scratch and bite across his limbs stinging as blood rushed to them, his body working overtime to heal. (Y/N) draped his healthy arm across her shoulder, wrapping her arms around his waist, trying her best to keep him steady. She barely reached his chin, but he’d be damned if he didn’t revel in her touch.
Once inside, she didn’t allow him to move another muscle. She fetched the clothes Billy told her to get and got the first aid kit from the bathroom while he dressed. In the kitchen, she got a bowl of warm water and a cloth before carefully washing away the blood from his visible wounds. She worked quickly and quietly, her brow furrowed in concentration, all of her attention focused on the task.
But it was the tears that glimmered in the corners of her eyes that captured Paul’s attention. “Hey, hey, why are you crying, pretty girl?” he cooed softly as he cradled her face. “Those tears better not be because of me.”
“I can’t help it,” she sighed as she finished wrapping his shoulder. “If I hadn’t distracted you, Jake wouldn’t have bit you. I just wanted you guys to stop.”
“Hey, that wasn’t on you, (Y/N),” Paul responded softly. This was a sanctioned fight that I was not going to turn down. I’ve never liked Jacob, but I never really had a motive to beat him up. He got one dirty move in, but I pulled my own with him. He’s going to have some wounds of his own to heal.”
“None of this should’ve happened, Paul,” she sniffled. “If I hadn’t pushed you away, this wouldn’t have happened. If I had just left Jake when I needed to, this wouldn’t have happened. I made so many wrong decisions that ended up here, and if I had made them, this wouldn’t have happened.”
“Don’t do that, (Y/N). Don’t put this on yourself,” he assured. Even through the pain, he raised his other hand to cradle the other side of her face, using his thumbs to wipe away every stream of tears that fell. “I’m the one that could have prevented all of this. I should have told you everything from the very beginning, but I waited until it was too late. If anyone is at fault, it’s me.”
“I don’t think I would have believed you,” she smiled as she closed her eyes to sink into his touch, reveling in the closeness and thankful for their safety. “I barely believed Bella until I saw you guys turn into wolves. And I was too blinded by Jacob to believe anything else.”
“It still doesn’t make any of this your fault. We all made decisions that had consequences, good and bad. Let’s just agree is not one’s fault.”
“But
”
“No one’s at fault, (Y/N),” he smiled. “No one.”
Their eyes met and bore into one another, finding a glimmer they had not seen in a while. There was a sense of déjà vu that floated between them as they were taken back to the moment (Y/N) had been hurt herself and Paul had been the one to clean and wrap her wounds. They had been that close, the moment had been that intense, their feelings had been that undisclosed. But there was one distinct difference. There was no Jacob in the way.
Just as it had happened before, neither of them knew who had leaned in first, but in a matter of seconds, their faces had breached the distance between each other. Their noses were grazing each other, and their breaths caressed each other’s skin, but neither made the final move. All they had to do was get closer. Just one slip and

“I’m sorry, (Y/N),” Billy interrupted. “But could I have a moment with Paul? I just want to talk to him before he takes you home. I think it’s best you finally rest.”
“Oh, of course,” she muttered. “I’ll be in the living room.”
Once she was out of the room, Billy settled beside Paul, a warm smile stretched across his mouth. “I’m sorry for interrupting,” he chuckled softly. “But you must know I am very protective of (Y/N). I may have been lenient and patient with my own son—something I will regret for a long time—but I still care for her quite deeply.”
“I wouldn’t hurt her, Billy,” the boy assured. “I wouldn’t ever hurt her, not willingly.”
“I know that. Don’t worry, kid,” he smiled. "I just wanted to thank you—for today, I mean.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever had a father thank me for beating his son up.”
“Well, normally I wouldn’t, but that boy had long slipped from my hands, and I haven’t been as strict as I should have,” the man sighed. “He needed a reality check, and I know no better person to give it than you. What he did last night is not only unforgivable, it’s immoral and appalling. If his mother could see him now
 let’s just say she’d be quite disappointed. I don’t know where I went wrong with him.”
“Can’t say it’s on you. Jake’s delusion is all him.”
“Still, I apologize for everything he has done,” Billy reaffirmed. “I’ve always been quite protective of (Y/N), and I thought she’d be safe with Jake. Unfortunately, I was wrong. But I certainly wasn’t expecting you to be the one to look out for her. Still, I am grateful. You’ve proven to be quite the exemplary young man, Paul. And I’m glad you are nothing like what people say of you.”
“She deserves someone that isn’t like who I used to be,” the boy confessed. “Ever since the imprint bond, I’ve been trying to become the person I know she deserves. For the longest time, I haven’t been, but I want to—I’m really trying.”
“And she’s alive today because you have. I have not seen her smile like she did just now in a long time, and I have you to thank for.” He placed a comforting hand on Paul’s healthy shoulder, squeezing comfortingly. “You’re a good kid, Paul, and I know you’ll be the man she deserves. But I will say it’ll take time for her to trust and love again. Give time to time, and everything will fall where it may.”
“What about Jake? What do you think will happen to him?”
“Well, I believe he will find himself alone, and he’ll finally understand everything he’s done wrong,” Billy sighed. “Sometimes we must hit our head against a wall to know we’ve been walking down the wrong path, and I think he hit himself against a very strong wall.”
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andreafmn · 27 days
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Collision | Chapter 22
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Word Count: 3.4K
Story Description: (Y/N) Uley is back home after being away for four years. Her life is at its first standstill and she is taking this time to find out who she is without school. But she never thought that coming back to the reservation would turn her whole life around. In the midst of secrets and mystery, a man crashes into (Y/N)’s and her life will never be the same.
A/N:  can't believe how different my characters are in my twilight stories. this Paul is so much different than Speak Paul, and so is Jake, it kinda breaks my brain 😅
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A moment can feel like an eternity when the soul isn’t at ease. Time seems to reverse and turn over on itself, holding the body hostage to its grapples. It twists the mind, numbs all reason, and feeds doubt. Time can sometimes be scarier than death itself.
(Y/N) could have sworn the entire day had passed before the pack finally walked through the doors. But the light coming from the outside told her it was still early. They walked in as though nothing had happened, and they hadn’t just torn a vampire to shreds. The boys laughed and patted each other on the backs, celebrating as though their lives had not been in peril.
As soon as they came into view, the girl ran to her brother and wrapped her arms tightly around him. She wrapped them around his neck as his own caught her by the waist. Once she felt him with her own hands, she finally let out a strangled breath, allowing all the anxiousness to roll off her body.
“Oh, thank the spirits you’re okay,” she breathed shakingly. “I thought something happened to you.”
“You need to give me more credit here, bean,” he chuckled. “We take this job seriously.”
“I was scared.”
“Come on, he was outnumbered,” Sam shrugged. “There was no way we were going to let him go. He was easy meat.”
“So, none of you got hurt? You’re all okay?” 
“Of course we are,” Paul interjected. “That guy had nothing on us.” 
“I told you they would be okay,” Emily said, carrying a plate of fresh biscuits that the boys dug into as quickly as it reached them. “The boys always come home. Especially when they know that there’s food on the table.”
“I knew I could smell chicken,” Jared grinned. “I’m starving, man.”
“When are you not?” Embry teased as he walked past him.
“Oh, the young kid has some bark in him,” Jared chuckled. “You’re finally one of us.”
Laughing, Embry, Jacob, and Paul walked right past (Y/N) and to the dining table. Jacob was about to do the same but stopped next to her. “Bella’s okay,” she said. “She got home a while ago. She’s still a bit shaken up, mostly because of the giant wolves she saw.”
“Okay,” he said as he let out a breath of relief. “Thanks.”
“She’s tougher than she looks, Jake,” (Y/N) smiled. “She’s also smart, and she has a lot of questions.”
“I know,” Jake sighed. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do.”
“Forcing the imprint bond hasn’t worked out?” the girl teased. “I thought it would.”
“Not funny, (Y/N),” he pouted. “But no. I guess everyone was right. It’s just
 she deserves so much better.”
“Don’t we all, Jake? Don’t we all,” she said as she patted him comfortingly on the shoulder. “Now, go eat. You gotta refuel.”
“Yeah. I’ll see you around, (Y/N).”
“Bye, Jake.”
As the boy left her by herself, her gaze found her brother. He was sitting on a bench in the backyard, his shoulders slumped and a hand over his eyes. Sam was tired, that much she could tell. But it wasn’t because of the vampire. No. It was a fatigue she knew very well.
“Hey,” she said softly as she sat next to him. “How’re you doing?”
“I told you we’re all good, Bean,” Sam smiled weakly.
“That’s not what I mean, Sam. How are you?”
“I’m fine,” he breathed. “Just
 tired. I was worried before that. We caught the leech’s scent first, and we were ready for a fight—finally finish up who’s been killing all those hikers. But then your scent was mixed up in it and I got so stressed that I wouldn’t get to you in time. I’ve been worried that a bloodsucker would take you away from me, but I never thought it could’ve happened this way.”
“I’m not going anywhere, Sam,” (Y/N) said as she wrapped her arms around her brother. “Not for a while, at least.”
“It was scary to realize how easy it would have been for that guy to kill you.” His voice trembled as he spoke, the protector mask quickly falling away. “With how things were going with the doctor, I was sure I would have to get used to not having you near again. But today reminded me about how you could have been gone for good. And what would’ve happened if you had no idea who we were? You would have no idea that we were trying to protect you, and you would have been just as terrified as Bella was. You would have been scared of me.”
“Well, I guess that’s one thing you can be grateful about him,” (Y/N) smiled, squeezing her brother’s hand comfortingly. “This is one secret you don’t have to hide from me.”
“It’s a shitty secret.”
“It’s a necessary one, Sam. You taught me that.”
“Yeah, it’s the reason two of the people I love most in the world got hurt,” he grumbled. “It’s a shitty secret.”
“What? You’re saying if it had been a choice, you would have said no?”
Sam sighed and let his head fall back as his eyes closed. “I don’t know, honestly,” he admitted. “It’s an honor to have been chosen to protect our people. But sometimes, I just wish the responsibility fell onto someone else. If it hadn’t been for this, so many lives would have been different. I know I’m meant to be the strong one, but I just can’t help but wonder why me sometimes.”
“Do you remember what you told me before I left for school?” (Y/N) said. “I wasn’t sure why I had been the one chosen for the scholarship and I was so scared that the school had made a mistake that I wanted to stay home. You told me that the only one who didn’t believe in me was myself —that I would always be my harshest critic and that I would never believe how amazing I was no matter how much people told me. Well, now it’s your turn, Sam. You’re doing an amazing job as an alpha. You’re keeping out people safe, you have a beautiful fiancĂ©e that loves you, and you’re the best brother a girl could ask for. If the universe chose this job for you, it was for a reason.”
“Yeah, an alpha that didn’t have a hold on things and managed to not only scar the woman I love, but I couldn’t even stop you from getting hurt,” he exclaimed. “And now all these hikers are dead, and even though we killed this leech, another one with a vendetta is gonna come here for the Swab girl. I just can’t seem to do things right. I have no business caring for all these people.”
“Sam, I can’t think of anyone else that would be perfect for the job. You’ve been taking care of me and mom for a long time. Even when you didn’t have to, you always made sure we were okay. You made me dinner when mom was at work after school, you were there at every science fair, you even taught me how to ride a freaking bike,” she chuckled. “I don’t think you realize how good of a person and a leader you are. How you always step up to the plate when anyone needs you, no matter how trivial the matter is. You’re an amazing brother and an amazing alpha. We are all gonna lose someone sometime, no matter how hard we try to save them. Our job is to save those we can.”
Sam allowed the words of his sister to skin into his head, slowly allowing his body to relax. He settled into the bench comfortably and draped an arm around (Y/N) to bring her in for a side hug. “Since when do I have a little sister that is so smart?” he teased lovingly. “Don’t remember the moment you got old enough to give me advice.”
“Sam, you’re barely older than me.”
“Doesn’t change the fact that I’m older.”
“No. You’re just old.”
The pair of siblings joined the rest of the pack soon after, gathering around the table to enjoy the feast that Emily had prepared. They ate, they laughed, they talked, and finally, they crashed all around the fireplace in the living room. Jared and Embry had taken the sofas, and Emily and Sam had excused themselves to their room while Jacob had said his goodbyes and gone back home. The only people that were left awake were Paul and (Y/N), tension surrounding the air around them.
(Y/N) knew that avoiding Paul couldn’t last much longer, especially not when she could have lost him that afternoon. She had waited for him to come home, breathless and terrified that the last moments she had spent with him had been avoiding him. The survival of their friendship rested on the conversation she did not want to have with him, but she knew it was essential if she ever wanted him to stay her best friend.
“So,” she said, finally breaking the silence. “How’ve you been?”
“Oh, you finally have some time for me in your busy schedule?” Paul teased. “How lucky am I? Maybe I should face vampires more often.”
“Very funny, Paul.”
“Hey, I’m not the one that has been avoiding you for weeks now,” he shrugged as he threw his hands up in defeat. “What’s that about?”
The girl sighed as she restless her head against the wall, staring up at the wooden ceiling than into Paul’s eyes. She could feel his state burning a joke through her skull, seaman ding entrance into her innermost thoughts.  “Paul, you know what it’s about,” she responded. “You were getting too attached, and I didn’t know how to manage that.”
“Are you serious, (Y/N)? I was growing too attached?” Pail spoke in shouted whispers, wanting nothing more than to explode at that. But exhaustion clawed at his body, and the last thing he wanted was to let his wolf out. “And what have you that brilliant idea?”
“Paul, come on. The night Jacob finally turned, I could hear it in your voice,” she recalled. “You said there was something you just had to tell me, and I’m pretty certain I know what it is.”
“Oh yeah, Einstein? And what’s that?”
“That you want more,” she stated. “That you want us to be more.”
Surprise ran through Paula’s face before quickly transforming into an angry scowl. It had been what (Y/N) had wanted to avoid, but it was no use to continue pushing the inevitable. “Come on, (Y/N),” he exclaimed. “You can’t tell me it doesn’t make sense. We work well together, we have chemistry, and we have known each other for so long. Why won’t you just give it a chance?”
“Because I don’t see you that way, Paul, and I never will,” she responded. “You’re my best friend, yes, and we get along well because of it. It doesn’t mean that I want to be with you. I told you from the start that this was not gonna be anything other than just a physical thing—I was very clear on that.”
“So, what? You just use me for my fucking body but won’t even give yourself a chance to see if you might have feelings for me?” Paul spat. “Is it because of the bloodsucker? He broke you so much that you won’t give anyone else a chance?”
“This has nothing to do with him. I simply don’t have feelings for you, Paul.”
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” His voice rose as he jumped to his feet. “He’s not coming back, (Y/N)! He left you. He took his family, and he left you. Why won’t you get over him already?”
“Whether he was here or not, my feelings for you wouldn’t change. I see you as a friend, and I’ll always see you as a friend, Paul,” (Y/N) stated, trying her best to stay calm. She knew that playing into his game would only work to make him angrier, and the result could be catastrophic. “If you can’t handle that, then I think it’s best we just cool things off.”
“Oh my god, you are still in love with him,” he scoffed. “After all that bullshit that you went through for months. He told you he didn’t care about you. He said you were only a moment in his eternal life. He doesn’t love you, and he never fucking did.”
By that point, the pair had gotten an audience, the two teens that were asleep on the couches had woken up and Sam had come out of his room. But none of that seemed to deter Paul from continuing with his rant. He was seeing red and didn’t care if what he said hurt her. “You don’t care that he stomped on your heart and didn’t give it another thought. I bet you’d take him right back if he asked,” he spat. “I guess you both have something in common, though. You take what you want from people and, once you’re done with them, you throw them away.”
“That’s quite enough, Paul.”
“No, Sam, it’s okay,” (Y/N) interjected. “From the beginning, you knew what you were getting into, Paul. I didn’t want a relationship, and I sure as hell have never given you any indication that I wanted one with you. I’m sorry if you are hurt, but I was very clear about what I did and didn’t want. It’s not my fault you believed this could ever go anywhere.”
“You knew exactly what you were doing when you asked me to be your fuck buddy,” the boy seethed. “You knew you’d be leading me on, and you held it over me like a fucking toy.”
“Don’t you dare put this on me, Paul,” she said, her tone rising as frustration overtook her. “I was very clear. I was very honest. Not once did I ever say or even insinuate that I wanted to be with you. I’m sorry that I did use you for your body and the convenience, but it is not my fault that you deluded yourself into believing that we could be together.”
“You are honestly unbelievable, (Y/N). You used me, and now you wanna make it my fault,” Paul pushed. He closed the distance between them, towering over her like a dark cloud. He could see or hear reason; he couldn’t even admit that everything he was saying was a lie. All he could see was red. “No wonder you fell for a bloodsucker. You’re just as heartless and cold as them. I bet you wouldn’t even give betraying us a second thought if it meant you could save one of them. Maybe he left you before you could leave him. After all, it is in your genes.”
The words struck a chord in (Y/N). She gathered all the strength she had, recoiled her hand, and slapped Paul firmly across the face. But where everyone was expecting her hand to shatter at the contact, the hit went through and made the boy’s face snap to the side. The mere surprise had him stumbling a couple of steps back, holding his face as it grew pink from the strike.
After the initial shock, anger bubbled inside him, and he charged toward (Y/N). But he couldn’t even make it a step toward her before Jared and Embry were shielding her. The boys grabbed Paul’s arms and held him back as he fought, yelling at them to let him go.
“That’s enough!” Sam’s voice bounced off the walls, sending shivers even down (Y/N)’s back. “Get out of here, Paul, and cool off. That’s an order. Go with him, Jared.”
The second-in-command pulled Paul out of the house and far from view, leaving Sam and Embry with a tearful (Y/N).
“Hey, Embry, can you give us a second?”
“Uh, yeah, sure,” he mumbled. “You okay, (Y/N)?”
“Yeah, I’m okay,” she sniffled. “Thanks.”
 “I’ll, uh, be in the guest room until my shift starts.”
Once the boy had left, Sam wrapped his arms tightly around his sister, allowing her to crumble in his embrace. “He’s an ass, (Y/N),” he whispered. “And he had no right to say any of those things.”
“But he’s a little bit right,” she cried. “A few months ago, I was ready to leave everyone behind for a man that didn’t even spare me a thought. And then I used Pau to fill a void someone else left, knowing he had feelings for me. I’m just like dad.”
“Hey, absolutely not. You are nothing like him,” Sam affirmed. He cradled her face in his hands, wiping away the tears on her cheeks. “You are by far one of the most amazing human beings I know. You’re intelligent, you’re caring, and so determined. I don’t think you know just how proud I am of you. Paul’s just butthurt that you don’t like him. He doesn’t deal well with rejection.”
“It doesn’t mean he’d no right.”
“What could he possibly be right about? He’s barely passing his classes.”
“I still love him,” she answered meekly, her voice so low and broken she wasn’t sure she had said anything at all. “I miss him every single day, no matter what I do to forget him. I keep waking up thinking he’ll be just a drive away, but then I get to the hospital, and his office is empty. It’s not a bad dream, Sam. It’s my reality.”
“Bean, I didn’t
 why didn’t you tell me you were feeling like this?  I thought things were better.”
“Well, I thought the last thing you wanted to hear about was about my ex-boyfriend, who is literally centuries older than me and is your natural-born enemy,” (Y/N) chuckled through her tears. “And it’s not easy to say that I’m not over the guys that told me I was just a spec of sand in his lifetime.”
“Love is a strange thing, (Y/N). It’s hard to come by, and it takes forever to move on from. It hurts for a really long time, until one day you wake up and it doesn’t anymore,” he said, brushing back strands of her hair. “I don’t care who this guy is, Bean. If you need me, if you need to talk, you just have to tell me. I am here for anything you need. He may have been my enemy, but you are my sister, and that trumps everything.”
“Do you think they’ll ever come back?”
“Maybe not in our lifetime. The last time they left, they didn’t come back for almost seventy years. If they do come back, it’ll be long after we’re dead,” he shrugged. “Do you want them to?”
“Is it selfish if I say I do?”
“I mean, it does make me question how we’re related,” he teased. “But I don’t think you’re selfish for it. Just promise me one thing.”
“What?”
“If by some weird trick of the universe they do decide to come back, that you won’t go back to him, (Y/N). Or at least give him hell for it first.”
“I can promise you I will make him grovel until his knees give out,” she grinned softly. “But I do hope that, if they don’t come back, living without him gets easier soon enough. I hate carrying this black hole inside me.”
“It’ll get better one day, Bean,” he said as he wrapped his arms around her. “But while it isn’t, let me carry this burden with you. And just take things one at a time. Focus on school and work and forget about this whole thing with Paul. He’ll see reason soon enough.”
“I love you, Sam. Thank you fed everything that you’ve done.”
“I love you too, kid.”
“I’m only a year younger than you,” she laughed.
“A year is still a year,” he smiled as he chuckled. “Now, let’s get you home so you can rest and forget this all happened.”
Yet, it was a moment none of them would be able to rid from their minds. (Y/N) should not have been able to slap Paul without hurting herself, and she most definitely should not have hurt him. But, at that moment, no one was thinking about that. All they wanted was comfort and rest, and that’s all they did. Because in their town, there was always something new lurking around the corner.
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andreafmn · 1 month
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Hey everyone, I want to introduce to you all to the reason I have only been able to write on my phone and one handed:
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Meet little Miss Olivia Rosalie Hope. Well, Rosalie is only in my head because no one else wanted that name at home đŸ€­. But since she’s still such a baby, she requires a lot of attention, so writing has been a bit difficult. But hopefully I am able to get some chapters out to y’all. 💖
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andreafmn · 1 month
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I'm Not Afraid | Chapter 17
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Word Count: 3.5K
Story Description: (Y/N) Argent arrived at Beacon Hills to put to rest her father’s sister, Kate Argent. For the first time, her family has decided to settle down and sustain a life in this interesting small town. After 17 years, (Y/N) has the opportunity to establish interpersonal relationships but will she be ready to face the complications that come with relating to her cousin’s, Allison, friends; especially, the infamous Derek Hale. She will face the adventure of being associated with the Derek and McCall pack, as well as being faced with the discovery of certain aspects of her life she never imagined.
A/N: uh oh, things are changing...
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There was a tense air between (Y/N) and Derek as they reached her house. He helped her off the bike and kept his hand on her lower back as they walked to her front porch but did not say a single word. His stare was a million miles away, and she could tell his thoughts had been running rampant in his head.
“Are you okay, Derek?” the girl finally broke the silence as she slid her key into the door. “You feel weird. Like, distant.”
“I’m fine,” he said, his stoic façade still plastered on his face. “I just need to make sure you’re home safe before I get my pack.”
“They’re fine. They’re hiding up in my room.” She pulled out her phone from her pocket and showed him Isaac’s text confirming that they had locked themselves in her house. “But I need to know what you’re hiding right now because I know something’s up.”
“Everything’s fine,” he huffed. “Why are they here?”
“I thought they’d be safe here,” she responded. “Don’t change the topic, Derek. You know you can’t lie to me.”
“I just
 we gotta stay away from each other for a while, okay? Believe me when I say, it’s for the best.”
The answer took (Y/N) aback. She stepped away from his touch, as though suddenly it burned her. His words had seemingly come out of nowhere. They were in a good spot, she thought. They weren’t exactly in a relationship, but they weren’t not in one either. They had been speaking consistently for the past couple of weeks, they had seen each other when they could, and they had kissed. God, did they kiss. “I-I-I don’t understand,” she stammered as she blinked away her confusion. “I thought we were good. I mean, I know our situation isn’t exactly ideal, but I didn’t think it was going bad.”
“It’s just not the time to deal with feelings, (Y/N),” he sighed. “I have to focus on how to get rid of the Kanima and why Scott would betray us. I simply don’t have the bandwidth to focus on you too.”
“Oh, I didn’t know I was such a distraction,” (Y/N) scoffed, putting another step of distance between them. “You know, it was only a few weeks ago that you were saying you wanted this to work. No matter how long it took or what hurdles we had to go through. You said I wouldn’t have to go through life alone, not while you were here. Was that all just bullshit?”
“It wasn’t
 It isn’t
” He ran his hands across his face in frustration, letting out an infuriated groan. “With everything that’s going on, I can’t risk being close to you, (Y/N). The more time that passes with the Kanima here, the more hunters will arrive. Especially now that I have a target on my back, thanks to your cousin. Being with you only makes that target bigger, and it puts it on my pack too. I have to make the right decision for them.”
“So, everything I’ve done to help you guys out means nothing?” she cried, biting down the tears that threatened to spill. “I’ve stuck my neck out for you on more than one occasion. I think I’ve proven to be an asset to you and your pack when it comes to my family.”
“You have and I’m grateful,” he said. Derek took a beat before continuing. It seemed he knew the next words out of his mouth would drive a wedge between them that he wasn’t sure would ever be removed. “I just don’t know if one day you’ll turn on us like Allison has done to Scott, or even like Kate did to me.”
If there was anything he could say that would drive (Y/N) away, it was that. Her fears of one day becoming like her aunt still haunted her to that day. It was a quiet but haunting rumble in the pits of her mind, fed by her insecurities and her fears, and very much alive.
“A-are you serious?” (Y/N) wanted to appear confident and confrontational. But she couldn’t help the way her voice broke. “Do you really think I’d be capable of doing something like that?”
“I can’t be sure, (Y/N). I want to believe that you won’t and that you and your father are truly on our side, but I have to take precautions. It’s not just my life that’s at stake.”
(Y/N) didn’t know if his words stung more than the unchanging expression on his face. There was no care, no compassion. She wasn’t talking to Derek, her sour wolf. She was speaking to Derek, the alpha. “What brought this on, Derek?” she asked. “What made you change your mind all of a sudden?” 
“It wasn’t anything specifically. It’s just
 the situation we’re in is basically unheard of, and I need to make sure that I’m putting a hundred percent of my brain into resolving this,” he said. “And if Scott isn’t going to help, then I have to find a way to end this once and for all. I can’t be worrying about the hunters coming from your side too.”
 Words died in the girl’s mouth as she tried to conceal the hurt that coursed through her veins. It was a betrayal like no other. “Is that really how you feel?” (Y/N) asked, her resolve quickly coming undone. “You once told me that you knew that I would never be like Kate. That there was no way I could be that heartless. Does that mean you lied? Have you always felt this way?”
And with determination like she had never seen from him, he said, “Yes.” By then, she couldn’t hold back the tears, but she wouldn’t let him see her hurt. She couldn’t keep the drops from falling, but she could keep her sobs inside. “(Y/N)
”
“Go,” she said sternly, facing her door and giving him her back.
“(Y/N), I
”
“I said go, Derek,” she restated, raising her voice. “You can call your pack after. But you need to get out of here right now.”
Before he could say another word, (Y/N) slipped into her house and locked the door behind her. Shuddering cries threatened to break through, so she clasped her fist into her mouth and bit down. She did not want him to hear her. He’d been able to shatter her heart with a few words, but he did not deserve to know her pain. Not anymore.
As the tears fell, she remembered the cuts on her face. Every time another drop fell, it sank into the open wound, mixing blood and salty water down her cheeks. The sting was enough to subside the pain in her chest, but not enough to make it go away. And all she wanted was for it to go away.
Suddenly, soft steps on her stairs forced her head to snap forward to see a witness to her despair. Erica wore a sympathetic smile on her face, something that surprised (Y/N) out of her tears. It had been the first time she had even held a kind gaze toward the girl, always throwing sarcastic comments or unnecessary jabs her way. But at that moment, she came to her as a friend.
“Let’s fix up that face,” she said. “Where’s the first aid kit?”
“Uh, um,” (Y/N) cleared her throat. “There’s one under the kitchen sink.”
“Let’s go.”
The blonde helped her up from the ground and followed her quietly into the kitchen. She didn’t throw snarky remarks her way or make fun of the way her face was most likely a disaster. All she did was remain silent and try to help.
Once the first aid bag was on the counter, Erica patted a stool to instruct the girl to sit. Something she very much obliged to before the werewolf set to work. She put on a pair of black gloves and set to clean the wound with cleansing wipes, clearing away any debris or tear that might have mixed with her blood.
“This is gonna sting a bit, okay?” Erica announced as she uncapped the liquid stitch bottle. “Do you need something to bite down on?”
“No,” (Y/N) smiled softly. “Go ahead.”
The girl winced softly as the liquid touched her skin, but it was quickly replaced with the comfort of Erica’s soft hands pinching the slash closed. She repeated the step two more times before cleaning the area once more and covering it with a gauze bandage. “There,” Erica said as she finished bandaging her arm as well. “The wound should breathe during the night to help with the healing. Try to keep it dry or without direct water contact for about five days, and you should be good.” 
“Thanks,” she said. “You’re good at this.”
“I’ve had one too many falls not to be,” the girl chuckled as she put away the kit. “It’s actually the reason I’ve always wanted to become a doctor. I wanted to make sure no one else went through what I did.”
“Why can’t you?”
“At first it was because I was so behind in school, I’d never get the grades to get into a good school,” she shrugged. “Now, with the whole werewolf thing, I don’t think I could.”
“Why not? I think now it’ll be so much easier for you,” (Y/N) offered. “Now, you don’t have to deal with the seizures, and you can focus on your schoolwork. Later on, I’m sure any school would be begging to have you go there.”
“I don’t know,” the blonde sighed. “I guess, after seeing everything I have and going through what we have in such little time, I think med school seems stupid in the grand scheme of things. I would love to live a normal life, but I don’t think I was ever meant to. I mean, at first, it was epilepsy. Now, it’s the fact that I’m part wolf, part human, and I have yet to get that under control.”
Seeing Erica be vulnerable and sweet surprised (Y/N), and it was a welcome distraction to whatever it had been that had gone down with Derek. “You know this is going to end someday,” she tried to comfort her. “We’re gonna beat the Kanima, and the hunters will go back to their own lives. Life won’t always be like this.”
“How can you be so sure? Something tells me there’s always gonna be something in this town,” she chuckled dryly. “The only way to go back to normal is to leave.” 
“Is that what you want? To leave Beacon Hills?”
“I mean, it’s a plan,” she shrugged as she sat beside (Y/N). “I didn’t think it would be like this. The constant looking over my shoulder, the fear that I’ll be caught, the fear that I’ll be killed. I wanted the strength, the power that came with being supernatural. But I didn’t really measure the danger that came with it. Unfortunately, not every hunter can be like you.”
“I think that’s the first time you’ve ever complimented me,” (Y/N) chuckled. “Don’t know how I feel about it.”
“Don’t get used to it,” the girl grinned. “But seriously, you have no reason to protect us like you have. I mean, apparently, even lovesick Allison turned on lover boy.”
“Yeah, grief makes you do unthinkable things,” she sighed. “Especially when you have a monster like Gerard whispering in your ear.”
“And he doesn’t whisper in yours?”
“God no. I don’t think he particularly likes my family. At least my dad and I.”
“Ooh, family drama?”
“None that I know the details of, but I know it has something to do with me and some woman from my dad’s past,” (Y/N) explained, remembering the not-so-hushed words from her parents. “Also, my dad sort of sides with the wolves rather than the hunters. He thinks their methods are too extreme and cause more harm than good. He told me he wants to change the group from the inside out, but it’s hard.”
“And you believe him?” Erica inquired, biting the skin from her fingers. (Y/N) could see she hadn’t noticed yet. It was something she did before turning, a way to calm her senses when everything seemed too much. “Do you really believe he’s on our side?”
“He helped me find Derek tonight, and he covered for me about the rave. I don’t think he would lie to me about that. My mom on the other hand
”
“Can’t stand us?”
“Yup.”
“Well, you can tell her the feeling is mutual.”
“Hey,” (Y/N) exclaimed with a smile. “That’s my mom you’re talking about.”
“No offense,” Erica laughed as she threw her arms up in surrender. “But seriously, I don’t think I’ve ever said this, but thank you, (Y/N). I’ve unnecessarily been a bitch to you, and you don’t deserve that. So, I’m sorry.”
“Am I really getting an apology from Erica Reyes? I think I might be dreaming.”
“Oh, come on,” she chuckled. “I’m trying to be serious here—vulnerable. I am grateful for what you’ve done for me, even when I was horrible to you. You didn’t have to.” 
“Well, you got the bitch part down, I didn’t think I needed it, too,” (Y/N) grinned before she took Erica’s hand and smiled warmly. “But it means a lot that you apologized. Thank you. Maybe from here on out, we could be friends. I honestly need more in this town.”
“I think that would be great,” she beamed. “I’ve been needing a dose of estrogen after so many months surrounded by testosterone.”
As the girls laughed, footsteps came down the stairs and quickly joined them in the kitchen, followed by the pitter-patter of claws against the hardwood floor. “Well, look at these two fraternizing,” Isaac told Boyd. “Never thought I’d see the day.”
“I would be rude not to when it’s her house,” Boyd shrugged. “Which, again, thank you for letting us hide out here. We haven’t really received any other instruction from Derek.”
“Yeah, and I don’t think you will anytime soon.”
“What do you
?” Isaac’s words died in his throat as he noticed (Y/N)’s bandages and the smell of iron in the air. He was quick to rush to her side, inspecting her visible skin for any other wound. “What the hell happened?”
“Ah, just a small run-in with Jackson,” she shrugged as she knelt to pet Brody, scratching him on the spot behind his ears he loved so he wouldn’t worry about her. “I’ll be fine. I just don’t heal as fast as you guys do.”
“How serious was the cut?” Isaac asked Erica, knowing (Y/N) would only wave him off. “Was it deep? I knew I should have gone with you to the station.”
“It wasn’t deep enough to need stitches, Isaac. She’ll be fine.”
“Dude, calm down,” Boyd chuckled. “She’s tougher than she looks.”
“Thank you, Boyd,” she smiled toward the boy. “I really appreciate the vote of confidence. You should learn from him, Lahey.”
“Yeah, it’s all fun and games until you get seriously hurt,” he grumbled, crossing his arms across his chest. “I can’t believe I let you go there by yourself. I should have been there.”
“And risk getting caught by my grandfather? Absolutely not,” she reprimanded. “As a matter of fact, all of you need to lay low because while Jackson is still the Kanima, more hunters will keep flooding into town, and I don’t wanna risk any of you getting caught. If you need a place to stay, I think I can talk to my dad and help you guys out. Maybe tell my mom the basement flooded and keep you guys there?”
“Thanks, (Y/N),” Boyd smiled. “We’ll talk to Derek first. See what the next steps will be.”
“Yeah,” she scoffed lightly. “And if you can find out what the hell is going on with him in the meantime, I’d greatly appreciate it.”
The four of them spent the next hour in her kitchen, talking and laughing like normal teenagers until Erica and Boyd said they were too tired to still be awake and headed to (Y/N)’s room. But not before the girl turned and thanked Argent for giving her a night where she felt normal. After that, only Isaac and her were left downstairs.
They had moved into the living room, where (Y/N) rested her head on his lap, and Brody curled up right beside them. Henry had texted her that he and her mother would be staying over at Chris’ house and that he’d keep her posted on anything that would be going down.
“I don’t understand what happened, Isaac,” she sighed as she felt his hands running through her hair. “Everything was going great until just an hour ago. What made Derek change his mind?”
“Honestly, I wish I could tell you,” he said. “But Derek’s not one to really talk about what’s going on in his head. The only time he’s ever been nice to me is when you’re around. He’s quite a dick when you’re not around.”
“But he’s still your alpha.”
“It’s not like there are many options here,” he chuckled. “And I guess I feel a bit indebted to him. If it hadn’t been for the bite, I’m pretty sure I would have ended up in the hospital, or even worse
”
Isaac couldn’t bring himself to say the words, instead taking in a shuddering deep breath. (Y/N) could see his eyes getting cloudy with tears as fear overtook him. Even if that part of his life was buried, there was no way to repress the memories.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that, Isaac,” she responded quietly, taking his free hand in hers. “And I’m sorry you had to go through it alone. I wish I could have at least been your friend back then.”
“I think you came at the perfect time,” he smiled softly. “Just long enough to get my shy and adorable side and stay to see my resurgence into an amazing and confident werewolf teenager.”
“You know, some people would say cocky and self-absorbed.”
“Well, those people would be wrong,” he chuckled. “But you did come at the right time. Those last couple of months, you actually gave me hope. If we had spent more time together, I think I may have even refused the bite.”
“Would you have, really?” (Y/N) mused. “Would you have given it all up?”
“I think so,” Isaac shrugged. “I mean, people around us don’t seem disturbed by what’s going on in this town. All I would have to worry about is whether or not I could pass my classes, and well, social services I guess.”
“Not funny,” she reprimanded, slapping him softly on the chest. “But the supernatural does suit you.”
“It does, doesn’t it?”
“Oh, calm down, Lahey.”
“I’m just kidding, Argent,” the boy laughed. “As for Derek, all you have to do is give it time. He can be a moody one.”
“Something feels different this time, though,” she sighed. “I don’t know what it is, but something’s just off.”
The last thing Derek had wanted was to make her cry. Hearing her sobs through her door made his heart wrench in his chest, and all he could do was get as far away from her as he could. His legs took off in a soft run at first but quickly turned into a supernatural sprint that had his lungs aching for air. All he could do was run.
Soon enough, the scenery of houses and cars turned into trees and bushes. Leaves crunched under his feet, and branches snapped as he stepped on them. Even when a rock stood in his way and threatened to make him lose his balance, he simply kept running.
He wished (Y/N) knew that what he did had been for her own good. If she wasn’t by his side, there was no way she could be used as a bargaining chip. Especially not with Peter back. He didn’t trust his own life in the hands of his uncle; how could he entrust him with (Y/N)’s?
By the time he had reached his family’s house, his body ached all over. Frustration filled his veins, and his limbs ached with the need for violence. He let out an exasperating scream before his fist went through a wooden board. He didn’t know if he wanted to keep breaking down the house or just sit down and cry. As much as he wanted to be by (Y/N)’s side, he knew that the best thing for her would be for him to stay as far away as possible. He had lived long enough with loneliness, though none as hurtful as this one for a long time. (Y/N) would soon enough move on from him, and he’d be the one to carry the hurt. As long as Peter was in town and her family would punish her for her affiliations, he’d just have to stay away.
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andreafmn · 1 month
Text
Speak | Chapter 24
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Word Count: 4.1K
Summary: Bella Swan was a disaster when Edward had left. Deciding she needed a little help, Charlie Swan receives with open arms his younger daughter (Y/N) Swan. She helps Bella during her depression and becomes inseparable from her long-lost friend Jacob. What she didn’t expect was falling for a hotheaded short-tempered silver wolf.
A/N: sorry the chapter is late, guys. had a party this weekend and had no time to write. but here it is! 💖 TAGLIST CLOSED 
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Morning brought unimaginable pain for (Y/N). As she stirred awake, the soreness that ransacked her body gripped her lungs tightly stopping all air from filling them. She wanted to yell out, but the dead was so intense that the sound died in her throat.
She reached her hands out, trying to make sense of where she was and how she could get help. Her mind was hazy, her memories failing to register inside her head. Until she felt warmth, and she remembered.
“Paul,” she meekly croaked out. “Paul, please.”
In a second, the bot had jumped out of the bed and was by her side. “What’s wrong?” he said, his voice dropping an octave with sleep hanging onto every word. “What do you need?”
“It hurts,” she groaned. “I think
 pills.”
(Y/N) had no energy to form more than a few words, not when pain pain seated into every part of her body. Her eyes followed Paul’s figure as he ripped the door open to go find what she needed. But before he could run, Emily appeared. She wore a warm smile on her face and carried a bottle of pills and a glass of water. Without another word, she handed the glass and two of the pills to (Y/N), who downed them as quickly as she could.
“Don’t try to get up until you feel the pills work,” Emily said as she ticked the girl back into the bed. “I’ve left some clothes for you in the bathroom and a towel. Your own clothes were quite shredded, so I put them in a bag for you—wasn’t sure what you’d want to do with them.”
“Are you on your way out?” Paul asked. “The funeral starts in like half an hour, right?”
“Yes,” the woman smiled softly. “Sam is just finishing getting ready. They came home an hour ago from doing some more rounds in the woods.”
“Oh, Harry,” (Y/N) cried as she remembered parts of the nights before. “My dad
”
The girl tried to get up from the bed, but the pain that shot through her back sent her back down. The wince that left her mouth had Emily and Paul rushing to her side to keep her from getting out of bed.
“Don’t get out of bed, (Y/N). You need rest,” Emily pressed. “You can talk to your dad after. For right now, you need to stay here and take the painkillers every four hours until you feel well enough to get home. I will give condolences to the family on your behalf.”
“But I
”
“No buts, (Y/N). You’re staying here with Paul until you can finally move,” she said sternly. “This is not up for discussion, okay? What happened last night was not something small. You are hurt and you need to rest. You’ve gone through enough.”
“Okay,” (Y/N) gave up. “Thank you, Emily. You’ve been very kind.” 
“Oh, no need to thank me,” she smiled. “As long as you promise that you two will finally talk things out. I cannot live another day with mopey Paul.”
“Emily,” the boy complained.
“Oh, hush, Paul. You know it’s the truth.” 
As he was about to respond, Sam’s head peeked into the room. It was odd to see him dressed up in a black suit and not his usual denim shorts and tank top. “Em, we’ve gotta go,” he said before noticing that (Y/N) was awake. “How are you feeling, kid? You really took a tumble yesterday.” 
“I can’t say I’m not hurting all over, but it could be worse,” she joked trying to lift Sam’s mood. There was a sadness behind his eyes that she could feel deep in her bones. Sam hadn’t just lost a member of the community; he had lost a part of his family. “Safe to say I’m not going into the woods or jumping off cliffs anytime soon.” ‘
“That’s probably a good idea,” he chuckled softly. “But you should listen to Emily and rest up for today. You went through more in the last twenty-four hours than people would in their lifetime.”
“It’s just the Swan way,” she said. “I’d be surprised if I never stumbled into life-threatening situations without meaning to.” 
“Well, I hope you don’t go through any more in a very long time,” Sam smiled. Emily walked to join his side as they prepared to leave for Harry’s funeral, the same solemn look falling over their faces. “We’ll see you when we get back, guys. There’s food in the fridge if you get hungry.”
“I also left some fresh muffins on the kitchen counter,” Emily added. “But you’re welcome to anything here.”
“Thanks,” Paul answered. “Please tell Sue how sorry I am.”
“Of course,” she smiled. “Now, get to talking, you two.”
The couple left the house with Jared and Embry trailing quietly behind them, leaving (Y/N) and Paul to their own devices. It was quiet for a moment. Only the sound of the wind rustling the trees could be heard, not even birds were singing. The air around them was heavy and eerie, mirroring the feeling of many people in the reservation.
But silence wouldn’t fix things. It hadn’t done anything but drive a wedge between the two for a very long time. It had been the one thing that kept (Y/N)’s life stuck in the same pattern for over a decade. Silence had allowed hurt and discomfort to fester in her life for far too long, and there was no space for it anymore.
“I know I said I wanted to last night, but I don’t want to fight,” she said quietly. “I’m tired of fighting, of being on the defensive.”
“I don’t want to fight either,” Paul was quick to respond. He slid down the wall beside her and onto the floor, unsure of how much closeness she was comfortable with at that moment.
“You lied to me, Paul,” she added. “Not just about the whole werewolf thing, but that you weren’t hiding anything else.”
“What do you
?” 
“Jacob told me about the imprint bond,” she interrupted. The words felt like gravel in her throat as they reminded her of every jab Jake had thrown at her. “I don’t understand why you find it so easy to lie to me, Paul. I thought we were always meant to do the honesty thing. But somehow, when I find myself wanting to forgive you, I find out you’ve lied to me about something else. The worst part is I don’t know how to trust you anymore.”
“What did he tell you?” the boy asked, unsure of what his words could be. “A-about the whole imprint thing, what did he say?”
“He told me that every wolf has one, and all it takes is for their eyes to meet for your entire world to change,” (Y/N) said. “He said that you’re meant to become whatever your imprint needs you to be and that there will always be an unnatural pull toward each other. He said that’s the reason we couldn’t seem to stay away from each other
 and that the imprint bond is the only reason someone like you would ever be interested in someone like me.”
Paul’s face contorted at what she said. A mix of anger and sadness forced its way onto his features, unable to hide the sting from her words. Once more, Jacob had beaten him to the punch out of spite twice. He had done it not only to hurt him, but to hurt (Y/N). And he couldn’t let it slide any longer. “That’s not all there is to it,” he said, trying his best to contain his anger—it wasn’t directed at her, and he’d be damned if he let her be the bearer of it again. “The moment you see them, your entire sense of self changes. Your entire reason of being is them—to protect them, to care for them, to be what they need when they need it. They are the force with which your world moves. It’s true that there is an unnatural pull toward them, but it’s so much more. Being away from them is physically painful, like air can’t really reach your lungs or blood doesn’t get to your brain. I don’t know how to explain it better than it feels like you’re walking through life with a hole in the middle of your chest.”
“So, if I’m your imprint, that mean you’ve been feeling that way for a long time?”
“Well, yeah,” he admitted. “But that’s my fault.”
“I still don’t understand why you couldn’t tell me this,” (Y/N) exclaimed. “I was going crazy because after the bonfire I couldn’t get you out of my head. For years, I had wanted Jacob and I had him, but you snuck into every thought, every dream, every moment. Jake asked me from the first time we saw each other to keep my distance from you. And I would have if I hadn’t felt this need to get closer. I believed I was just a bad girlfriend but excused it away by saying that I just wanted to have friends. But it was this desire that consumed me. I wished to be asleep so I could see you in my dreams. The moments we weren’t talking, my hands itched for my phone just to text you. And I thought, maybe this is why Jacob is always mad at me. No matter what he did or how much I thought I loved him, you somehow found your way back into my head. Do you have any idea how bad that made me feel? I had everything I ever wanted and somehow it was not enough. Not when you were around. “And somehow Jacob knew that he wasn’t enough for me anymore. Not since I saw you,” she continued, her eyes brimming with stinging tears. “The more I thought of you, the more he held onto me. He asked me for one thing, and I couldn’t even give him that. So, by the time he exploded over Embry, I couldn’t help but think it had been because I couldn’t do the only thing he had asked. It made me think I deserved all his mistreatment. Because my heart I believed belonged to him, but my mind thought of only you. “At the end of the day, I guess both of you were right,” she chuckled sadly, wiping away the streams that warmed her cheeks. “He only got close to me because of Bella, and you only cared about me because of the imprint link. I bet that makes you happy.”
Paul couldn’t stand the fact that she thought that way, it pained him far more than the distance that had built between them because of his decisions. He knew he’d never been one to make the best choices but keeping the truth from (Y/N) had been the worst one yet. “None of this makes me happy, (Y/N),” he responded softly. All his anger had swiftly dissipated as he saw the pain in the girl’s tears. “When I said that, I had never meant for it to be true. It was merely a thought that I had not been able to keep inside. I had been speaking with anger and spite that day, hurt by the kiss you had shared with Jacob after he had broken things off with you. It was petty and childish, and I wish I could take it all back. “About the pack’s secret, well, you have to know I thought I was doing the right thing,” he explained, taking tentative steps toward her. “This world is not one I wanted you in the middle of. I thought that the less I told you about wolves and vampires, the less danger would follow you. But I forgot who your sister was and how, even without knowing about the supernatural, she attracts danger. The second you stepped foot in Forks you were thrown into the center of this world, long before we ever locked eyes. But I
 in trying to avoid what had been done to your sister, I ended up doing the same to you, and I’m sorry, (Y/N). More than you could ever know.”
“And about the imprinting?”
“That, well, I, uh,” he found himself stammering as he finally brought himself to sit at the end of the bed, clasping his hands tightly on his lap. “I guess I didn’t want you to think that the only reason I wanted to get close to you was because of it. But, again, I gravely miscalculated what other people would do.”
“How can it not be that, Paul?” (Y/N) asked, her eyes already reddened from the tears, but the pain in her body disappeared as the minutes passed. “If it hadn’t been for the bond, you wouldn’t have even looked my way.”
“Is that really what you think? That I would have never been interested in you if it hadn’t been for a mystical tether?”
“Come on, Paul,” she sniffled. “We’re basically from different worlds. If we went to the same high school, you would have walked right past me in the halls.”
“That’s not
”
“Look at you, Paul, and look at me,” (Y/N) exclaimed, her voice breaking as it rose in volume. “I know you were quite popular in school before the whole werewolf thing. You went through your fair share of girls, and you didn’t quite care about what anyone thought of you. Me? Sure, I had some friends and even had a boyfriend, but I’ve always been the person that has been overlooked. The one people want around when there’s a project to be done or something artistic to be made. No one missed me when I left. I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t have wasted a single glance toward me.”
Paul wanted to laugh then. Shake her until she knew how wrong she was. Instead, he spoke. “You don’t remember, do you?” At her dumbfounded stare, he continued. “When we first went out, I told you that wasn’t the first time we had met. Do you remember that?”
“I, uh, I don’t. Not really.”
“Well, I did sort of just mumble it out,” he chuckled. “I came here to La Push when I was only eight. My parents had just gotten divorced, and I had so much anger and confusion inside of me. Pair that with a sudden move four hours away from everything I knew, I was sure it would be the worst summer of my life. One day, I had been walking down my street because my dad had forced me out of the house—said I had spent enough time holed up in my room and I needed to make friends. I never planned to meet anyone but if I stayed in the house, I would most likely just end up fighting with him. “One second I was walking, kicking a rock down the road, and the next I was on my ass because someone had run straight into me,” he said. “I was ready to yell at whatever idiot kid had decided to ram into me, until I heard her laugh. A girl had been the one to hit me and she had landed on the floor as well and, instead of getting angry, she burst out into a beautiful song of laughter that made all the bubbling anger die. “She got up from the ground and offered me her hand,” he smiled. “She said, “Sorry, I wasn’t looking. I’m supposed to be playing hide and seek.” Her pants were covered in red dust from the ground and her hair had been disheveled, but she didn’t care. “My name’s (Y/N).” You were the first person I ever met, and you didn’t even live here. You said I could join you and your friends if I helped you find a good hiding spot. Then we could talk about being friends.”
The memory sprouted clearly in (Y/N)’s mind. It had been a hot summer midday and the Black kids and her didn’t want to stay stuck in Billy’s house. Bella didn’t want to play and stayed back with a book while Rachel, Rebecca, Jake, and her ran through the reservation—the older girls had mostly agreed to keep an eye out for the younger kids. They had enlisted the company of Seth, Embry, and Quil. It was summer, and all they cared about was having fun.
It was Jake’s turn to seek, and he’d always had a knack for finding everyone quickly. So, (Y/N) had set off to find the best hiding spot she could think of. The second Jacob had started counting she had sprinted off in the opposite direction, hoping he didn’t sneak a glance.
That’s when she had run straight into a boy she did not recognize. Her butt had hurt from the impact, but she couldn’t help but let out laugh after laugh. She had worn light colored pants that had turned red from the dust on the ground and her shirt had ripped where it went past her hips. She had always been told that the Swans tended to be clumsy but seeing it in action always made her laugh.
The boy had seemed angry at first, but by the time she had reached her hand toward him, his scowl had turned into a soft smile, and then he had laughed with her too. He had told her his name was Paul after she had given hers and that he had just moved to the reservation with his father.
“You said I could hide in your neighbor’s shed because they were out for the summer,” she recalled. “We stayed there for thirty minutes until I knew I had won that round. And I
”
“You gave me a bracelet you had made with your mom before you had come to Forks,” he continued. “I carried it with me until it got too short to wear around my wrist, so I tied it to my house keys. I still have it. And I
”
“You gave me a braided leather bracelet that you had brought from Tacoma,” she interrupted. “I keep it hanging on my bed because I didn’t want it to break.”
“Every single year I waited for you to come back, and you would,” Paul said. “But you always spent your time with Jake, and I couldn’t stand him, so I kept watching from afar, hoping you’d notice I was there. Until one year, you didn’t come at all, and I thought I had lost my chance to ever talk to you again. I never forgot about the girl I had met that day, the one that had made me laugh at a moment when everything seemed so bleak. I hadn’t forgotten, but I couldn’t quite remember. “Her face wouldn’t be the same and the image I had of her had begun to blur around the edges,” he admitted. “Until that day on the beach when everything rushed back. Not only had I met the person the universe had thought was my greatest match, but it just so happened to be that same girl that had laughed after she had crashed to the ground from running into me. The very girl I had waited for every summer since I had come to La Push. I don’t think we met that day out of pure chance, (Y/N). Sooner or later, we were always meant to meet.”
Every thought and emotion ran through (Y/N)’s head. There was so much uncertainty, but it mixed with hope, and it confused her all that much. “But how can you be sure that what you feel is not just the bond?” she asked meekly. “How do you know it’s real?”
“Because I’ve felt this way since I was eight,” he confessed with a smile. “I didn’t know it back then.  But ever since, I’ve never met anyone that makes me laugh or smile like you did that day. I didn’t need the universe to tell me what I felt that day, and I don’t need it to tell me what I feel now. It can’t tell you what to feel either, (Y/N). Not if you didn’t feel it at some point.”
“But what if
?”
“(Y/N), you don’t have to have all the answers right now,” he said as he took her hands in his in an effort to calm her mind. “But you do have the ones you were waiting for. Just take it one step at a time.”
“Doesn’t the bond mean
?”
“The imprint bond can’t force you to have feeling, (Y/N). It can only expand what you feel. That’s why imprintees don’t just become an imprint’s partner. Because they don’t always want us to be.”
“What would happen if an imprint rejected their wolf?” she inquired. “If distance alone can hurt that much, what would rejection do?”
“Well, it might just be the worst pain we could go through. It would be agony like no other. Do you not
? This might be too much, too fast.”
“No, I was just
 I’m not,” she stammered absentmindedly. “I don’t want to reject you, Paul. I’m not even planning to. I just don’t know what I’m supposed to feel right now. I’ve just been told so many different things that I think my mind is just reeling.”
“There’s no right or wrong feeling right now,” Paul smiled softly. “It’s a lot of information to take in.”
“I think I just
 I don’t know. Maybe I need to talk to someone else. Someone that has gone through all this.”
“Yes, of course,” he exclaimed. “Talk to Emily. If there’s anyone that can tell you about the imprint bond, it’s her.”
“So, werewolves, vampires, soulmates, any other lore I’m missing out on?”
“That might be it for now,” the boy shrugged with a chuckle. “But there might be things out there even I don’t know about.”
After sharing a laugh, the pair left to the kitchen to finally eat some breakfast, fueling their bodies after such a long night. Paul had helped (Y/N) to the table, rushing through the kitchen to serve the plates. He balanced the tower of food that was his dish in one hand and (Y/N)’s request in the other. His steps were slow and calculated until he made it to where she was sitting, placing the muffin basket in the center of the table after the plates were on it.
They ate quietly, (Y/N) pushing around her food before taking a bit, and Paul downing it in the blink of an eye. It would have been a far funnier sight if the girl’s head wasn’t still riddled with thoughts.
“I’m sorry for being angry for so long,” she finally broke the silence. “I just kept hearing things from other people and forgot to actually listen to you. A lot of the things that have happened could have been avoided if I just listened.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about,” he quickly added. “I was the one that kept all of this from you and let Jake tell you whatever he wanted. I had so many moments where I could have been honest with you but decided to keep it hidden. I’m the one that’s sorry, (Y/N). I’m the one who could have avoided all this if I just had the courage to speak.”
“Let’s just agree that we both could have said something at some point,” she smiled. “But I will say, if my back does end up with scars, I’m gonna have a very interesting story to tell.”
“I only know of two humans that have gone through a vampire attack and survived,” Paul laughed. “And they just so happen to be sisters.”
“I don’t think I ever thanked you for that,” she said. “I’m glad you found me, Paul.”
“As long as I’m around, nothing is gonna happen to you,” he promised as he took her hand in his. “Not anymore.”
“I don’t doubt that,” she beamed. “I also have to thank Embry and Sam for chasing the vampire away. Emily told me they got home late because of that.”
“You can do that right now,” he smiled. “They just got home.”
As he said that, Jared walked through the door, a look of concern sprawled on his face. It was the same stare Sam and Embry wore as they walked behind him. “We gotta talk to you, Paul,” the first boy said. “It’s, uh, it’s serious.”
“What happened?”
“It’s something to do with Jake,” he grimaced before continuing, “and (Y/N). About last night.”
“Did the vampire come back?” (Y/N) worried, squeezing Paul’s hand tightly as her heart raced. “Did she attack him?”
“Oh no,” Embry said angrily. “But Paul just might.”
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andreafmn · 2 months
Text
Heartbeat | Chapter 18
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Word Count: 3.3K Warnings: foul language, mature themes
Story Description: (Y/N) Marks had no free time. From studying for med school, working her rounds for clinical, and the occasional babysitting her sisters sprung on her, she was all booked up. But none of that stopped her from aiding her sister and their best friends to rob a grocery store. She could have never guessed those couple of minutes would be enough to change her life forever or that it would lead to her meeting the man that would catalyze that shift.
A/N: I love this story so much, y'all have no idea. But especially the AO3 version đŸ«ŁđŸ«Ł
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Hours later, and with a lighter heart, (Y/N) was back at home. She rehearsed in her head how she would bridge the topic of Beth’s employment to her and, even more, how she’d tell her that the FBI agent had also wanted to speak to her. It was obvious that her sister would have to come clean, but just how far did the girl’s own truth have to extend?
“Thanks for the ride,” she smiled as the car rolled to a spot. “I’ll let you know how everything goes.”
“Just let me know what you gon’ say, a’ight?” Rio said, reaching over the center console to cradle her chin. “Everything’s gonna be fine. I got you.”
“I know,” she smiled. “I’ll call you.”
“A’ight.” He pulled her face close to his and kissed her tenderly, holding onto her as if she belonged to him. “Night, (Y/N).”
“Good night, Chris,” she grinned. “Get home safe.”
She waited at the doorstep until his car had disappeared from the street, wondering just how her life had changed so much. Obviously, she knew when and why it had happened, but not why she remained. Two months before, she would have laughed in anyone’s face if they told her she’d be practicing clandestine medicine for gang members and their families while in a quasi-relationship with a gang boss willingly. It wasn’t the sort of thing she did. (Y/N) was careful, calculated, and a walking ball of anxiety. Everything she was doing negated that, but somehow, she couldn’t stop.
The house was quiet as she walked inside. Given the hour, she knew the kids would be dead asleep, but she hoped Beth at least was still awake. She always kept late hours, and now, knowing what she did, (Y/N) knew she’d most likely be wide awake.
Beth was at the kitchen island nursing a glass of whiskey when she noticed (Y/N) walking in, quickly slipping on her mask. “(Y/N),” she smiled. “What’re you doing here? It’s so late.”
“I’ve gotta talk to you.”
“What is it, (Y/N)? Is everything okay?”
“An FBI agent came by the hospital today to ask me some questions,” she said. Beth stiffened at the statement, avoiding her sister’s eyes at all costs. “He was asking about suspicious activities in the neighborhood and mentioned something about some pictures. He also said he talked to you and Dean. Do you know anything about that?”
“What exactly did he say, (Y/N)?”
“We didn’t get a chance to finish talking. A nurse told me Sarah had been admitted, and he gave me his card. Told me to go by his office soon,” she added. “I know there’s something going on with you and gang friend, Beth. I’m not an idiot.”
“Why would you think that?” Beth laughed awkwardly.
“Because why else would a federal agent be asking about suspicious activity in this area and come to you specifically to question?” (Y/N) retorted. “I need you to tell me everything that is going on and what I have to say when I go there.”
“Okay,” the woman finally relented. She rounded the island and sat down on a stool with a sigh, patting the one next to her for (Y/N) to sit on. “After Canada, I reached out to Rio—that’s his name—and asked him for work. The first task wasn’t exactly what we had in mind. He had us take care of someone that had been shot.”
“The phone call,” the girl recalled.
“Right, the phone call,” Beth grimaced. “That didn’t exactly work out, and I thought we’d be done for. That’s why he came here on Kenny’s birthday. He came to pick his “boy” up, but the guy had disappeared. But as of a few weeks ago, I called him up because I came up with a way to clean his money. Ruby, Annie, and I have been cleaning around 100 thousand dollars and getting a cut of the money. It’s not as much as we expected, but it was keeping us afloat
 for some time. So, I asked for an increase. We have to wash 500k this time.”
“So, not only did you lie to me when I asked why he’d come to the house, but you’re washing half a million dollars for him. I should honestly be more in shock here,” (Y/N) stated. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t any of you tell me about this?”
“That’s all on me, honestly,” Beth sighed. “Annie and Ruby told me you should at least know what was going on, but I wanted you to concentrate on school and not a life of crime. I didn’t think you’d be stuck in the crossfire like this.”
“Beth, you need to understand that I’m no longer a kid. I don’t need you to protect me anymore. Keeping me in the dark makes things worse for me. How do you think it feels to have an FBI agent show up at my work and he starts questioning me about things going on in the street?” 
“About as terrifying as it feels to have him come to my home twice and question me in front of my family,” she chuckled dryly. “But I am sorry we didn’t tell you about it, (Y/N) . I just didn’t want you to be in the middle of things. I wanted to make sure that if things ever got bad, you weren’t involved in it.”
“But I am in the middle of things, Beth. I’m your family. I literally live in your backyard,” she exclaimed. “Everything you do affects me. Whether directly or indirectly. Just like Annie and Ruby. You guys are the only family I have. I can’t protect you from things that I don’t know, and I’m old enough to be able to protect you guys. Or at least help in some way.”
“You are absolutely not helping us wash money,” Beth said sternly.
“I don’t know where I’d even find the time,” she chuckled. “But it’s still good to know just in case things like federal agents start showing up. Dean and the kids don’t have to know shit, but I do.”
“I’m sorry, (Y/N). I honestly just wanted to protect you from all of this. I didn’t think they’d seek you out, too.”
“Have you talked to the agent about Rio already?”
“I came home like an hour ago from doing that,” she sighed. “He had a picture of Rio getting into his car, and it looked like he was coming from the house. I told Agent Turner that I’d had an affair. That I met Rio at a bar-restaurant called Lucky’s. I said it had been a one-night stand and that I never planned on seeing him again.”
“Did he buy it?”
“It seemed like he did,” she shrugged. “He told me to be careful who I brought into my home. What I don’t understand is why he would ask you about it.”
“Well, if the picture is from the day of Kenny’s party, I did go out to talk to him,” (Y/N) said. “What if the same person that took the photo of Rio took a photo of me and him together? What am I supposed to say then? That he has a type?”
“That could work,” Beth mused. “You can stick to the same story somewhat. You’re young. They’ll think you were naïve.”
“Right, I can say

“I met him at a bar. Lucky’s, I think it was called. I’d had a long day at the hospital and needed to unwind,” (Y/N) said, clasping her hands on her lap. “He bought me a drink, and we talked a little, nothing important. After a few drinks, I went to the bathroom, and he followed. We made out on a sink, and he screwed me against the wall. I gave him my number, and he said he’d call, but I never heard from him or saw him again. Until that day when he was leaving Beth’s house, and I confronted him about it. I told him to lose my number and to never show his face there again. I don’t even remember the name he gave me, but I can tell he has a type.”
Jimmy Turner listened to every word (Y/N) said. She played the part of an oblivious girl very well. “So, you didn’t know who he was or what he did beforehand?” he asked. “And nothing about him put you off?”
“Not exactly,” she shrugged softly. “I wasn’t exactly going there to find the love of my life, you know? I just wanted a few drinks, and he just so happened to want an easy hook-up. We each got what we wanted, I guess.”
“And he didn’t give you his phone number back. You didn’t find that odd?”
“Well, he said he’d call. I had no doubts at that moment that he would, and it wasn’t like I was particularly interested in seeing him again,” (Y/N) explained. “Honestly, I was more hurt that he didn’t call because maybe it meant I wasn’t that good of a lay. Just stupid insecurities. Then I see him as I’m walking out to the main house, and there’s no way it can be him. He didn’t even apologize or anything. So, I told him to go.”
“Do you know who this man is?” Turner asked as he pushed the picture across the desk. “This is an inner-city gang banger, with quite a high position in his gang.”
“It’s not like he told me what he did for work. And I didn’t really ask,” she said. “Agent Turner, I didn’t know who he was, nor did I ask, because, frankly, I didn’t really care. He just happened to be there.”
“I’m just telling you because you’re young, and you should be careful about the people you keep in your company,” he said, and it sounded like he meant it. Like he truly cared. “He is not the kind of person that you should ever get involved with. One wrong move and your entire life could be derailed.”
“I understand,” she smiled softly, appearing like she regretted every decision she had made up to that point. “I don’t plan on doing something like that ever again. And I wish I could be of more help. If he ever shows up again, I’ll be sure to give you a call.”
“Just be careful, Ms. Marks,” he said with a kind smile—a real one for the first time. “This is not the kind of person a young lady like you should associate with.”
“I will,” (Y/N) responded as she stood from the chair. “Thank you, Agent Turner.”
“Take care, Ms. Marks.”
“You too.”
The second she was out of the building, (Y/N) finally felt like she could breathe. She walked briskly to her car and took steadying breaths once she was inside and out of view. The meeting had gone quickly and better than she had expected. Was it weird that Rio had slept with two sisters at completely different times? A bit, but it wasn’t impossible. Meeting at the same bar and having two completely different endings... it could happen. It explained how she knew him when he left Beth’s house, and it explained her anger. And, at the end of the day, she was just a dumb young woman who’d had a one-night stand at a bar bathroom after a few drinks. There was no way she could know anything about him. And she hoped her act was enough to derail the agent from her tracks.
As she drove to work, she pulled the burner phone from her bag and dialed Rio’s number, anxious to tell him what she thought. She’d had no real involvement that could tie her to him. Not any that the police could find. But she did worry about Beth, Annie, and Ruby, and how the money laundering could affect them. Yet, after speaking to her older sister, it seemed they had it in control, and the moment they didn’t, Beth had promised she’d speak out. For the first time in a long time, (Y/N) felt at ease and in control. And as long as things remained that way, everything would be okay.
“You good?” she heard him ask through the receiver. “How’d it go?”
“I’m good, and I think it went well,” she smiled. “And you should know, you’re quite the player, Mr. Christopher. Apparently, you bagged two sisters because you have a type.”
“Damn, ma’, you didn’t have to do me like that.”
“Well, at least you’re the dumb young lady who had a one-night stand with a dangerous inner-city gang banger,” she chuckled. “I think you came out like a winner in our stories.”
“I’m that good, huh?” he laughed. “So, he ain’t worried ‘bout you?”
“I don’t think he is,” she said. “He was more concerned about me staying away from people like you.”
“And are you gonna listen to the nice agent? ‘Cause it sounds like he’s looking out for you.”
“When have I ever done as told?” (Y/N) smirked. “But is everything okay on your end? No suspicious people or anything?”
“You ain’t gotta worry ‘bout me, (Y/N). I’ve been doing this for long enough.”
“I can’t not worry. That’s not in my DNA. I just wanna make sure everyone I care about is okay.”
“Hm, so you care ‘bout me?”
“Oh, don’t let it get to your head,” she scoffed jokingly. “I care about a lot of people.”
“Yeah, and I’m one of them.”
“You suck.”
“Not as well as you,” he continued to tease. “Matter of fact, you could be doing some of that right now.”
“You’re gross, and I have to go to the hospital,” (Y/N) said. “But if you’re nice to me, I could be persuaded to see you tonight.”
“Yeah, give me one good reason I should.”
“I’ll give you half a million reasons.”
After a moment of silence, she heard him suck his teeth before saying, “She told you.”
“Yeah. Told me everything that happened between you,” (Y/N) sighed. “Though she probably left out a few threats here and there. What I’m wondering is why you didn’t.”
“I told you most of it.”
“Honesty, Chris. That’s all I’m asking for,” she said. “Look, I’m not gonna ask about their work with you anymore. I just wanted to know details so that in cases like this, when an FBI agent shows up to question me, I know where I have to lie and what truths to bend. I’m not a little girl that needs to be protected from this big bad world.”
“Is it that bad that people wanna keep you safe?”
“Keeping me in the dark is not the same as keeping me safe. I need to know what’s out there before I’m in the center of it,” (Y/N) added. “As long as my sisters are okay, and you’re okay, I’m fine. Just please, if there’s anything I need to know, just tell me.”
“You’re up to date now,” he said. “But, like I said, honesty’s new for me. It’ll take time.”
“I know,” she smiled. “But you’re trying.”
“Yeah, you trynna make me soft.”
“Nah, you’re doing that all on your own,” she laughed. “I gotta go. Just got to the hospital.”
“But you coming over tonight?”
“I’ll let you know.”
“(Y/N).”
“Goodbye, Chris.”
She slipped the phone into her bag as she exited her car, a goofy smile spread across her face. Just the night before, she had been fuming at the lies and the deception, but all that was dead and gone. (Y/N) knew that holding onto the anger would only work against her. It was a new world they were all stepping onto, and mistakes along the way were inevitable. She just hoped they didn’t make the same ones over and over again.
“Mind telling me why the FBI was looking for you yesterday?” Mike’s voice startled her as she fit her things into her locker. “What the hell, (Y/N)?”
“It was nothing,” she shrugged off. “He just had some questions about some strange activity in Beth’s neighborhood.”
“Nothing? I don’t think the FBI follows up over nothing.”
“Mikey, it’s fine. It’s all been settled, okay?” (Y/N) chuckled. “No one’s in trouble. Everything’s fine.”
“(Y/N), seriously. What’s going on? You’ve been weird these past couple of months,” he worried. “Does this have something to do with the guy you were telling me about?”
“Look, Mike, I love you for worrying, but I’m fine. Okay? I’m great,” she smiled. “I’m having fun like you said I should. That’s it.”
“You told me the guy was dangerous, (Y/N). Just how dangerous?”
“Everything’s okay, Mike. Seriously. Nothing for you to worry about. Your kids still have their loving godmother.”
“How can I not worry when there are literal federal agents looking for you, (Y/N)?” he said. “Just promise me if things get bad that you’ll walk away. I need you okay, (Y/N). My kids need you okay.”
“I promise, Mikey,” she said as she hugged him tightly. “I’m not going anywhere.”
How could she tell him that every night she danced with the devil? That she was tempting fate with every phone call, every text, every patient she saw. She risked her life every second she wanted to remain by Rio’s side. But she couldn’t tell him anything about that. Not if she didn’t want him to worry.
“Well, we have about five minutes before rounds,” Michael smiled. “Tell me about your stupid boy.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Is he the reason the FBI wanted to talk to you?’
“Oh my god, no,” she chuckled, hoping her words were convincing enough. “Will you please drop it already? I told you it was about something that might have happened near Beth’s house. They even interviewed Beth and Dean. Just routine stuff.”
“Fine,” he resigned. “Then, just tell me five things about him.”
“Okay, um, well, he has a kid—a son. Marcus. They like to play soccer at the park,” she said. “He’s got tattoos. He likes to eat tacos—even has a friend with an awesome food truck. He’s very hot. And he’d older than me.”
“How much older, (Y/N)?” her friend asked in surprise. “And you’ve already met his kid?”
“I don’t know. Like ten years,” she muttered.
“I’m sorry, I thought I heard you say ten years,” he chuckled dryly. “Which would be crazy since he’s closer in age to both of your older sisters.”
“That’s what I said.”
“(Y/N), ten? Your frontal lobe is just one year old,” Mike exclaimed. “And he has a kid. You’re crazy.”
“It’s not that crazy,” she shrugged as she slipped on her white coat. “I mean, we’re both adults here. It’s not like I’m freshly eighteen or even twenty-one. I’ve got enough experience under my belt.”
“So, you got yourself a DILF?”
“Ew, don’t say it like that, you weirdo.”
“I mean, in your words, he’s hot, and he has a kid,” he recalled. “Ergo, DILF. And, it’s okay, game recognizes game.”
“Mikey, you are definitely not a DILF.”
“Not to you,” he argued. “But there are many people out there that would like to fuck this dad.”
“Michael, no man, woman, or non-binary person would hit it with you,” (Y/N) teased. “You’re lucky that you somehow trapped Olivia into marrying you.”
“Well, at least she saw potential in me,” he scoffed. “And she’d tell me that anyone would be lucky to tap this.”
They broke into laughter as Mike pointed at his body and did the world’s least attractive body roll. It was in moments such as those that (Y/N) truly believed that all was right with the world. The FBI was off her back, her sisters were getting some sort of income—as illegal as it may have been—Sarah was getting better, and Michael seemed to be happier. Everything seemed to be falling into place.
But (Y/N) had forgotten that the waters always calmed before the storm finally struck. She would enjoy every moment of peace she would get without realizing the dark clouds that lingered up ahead.
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andreafmn · 2 months
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Bound | Chapter 5
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Word Count: 2.3K Warnings: queer harassment
Summary: Rosalie always carried the resentment of not being able to fulfill the image of the perfect family she had in her head. But the universe had set out to grant her everything she could’ve hoped for in the most unconventional way and in the form of a witch. Can their love withstand the promise of forever or will Rosalie and (Y/N) succumb to the grapples of time?
A/N: oh, oh, I'm falling in love with a pairing that will not work out... I know I'm the writer, but, damn. I am breaking my own heart here. đŸ« đŸ«  also, two chapters in one day, wow
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There would come a day when (Y/N) didn’t have Beatrice Porter by her side. There would come a day when she wouldn’t be able to roll over in her bed and find the onyx-black strands of her hair splayed over a pillow or kiss her eyelids as they fluttered in sleep. But in 1935, she didn’t know that. 
In 1935, she still believed they had forever. At least as long as forever could be in their human lives. And because she didn’t know, she was able to live in the absolute bliss of being with her best friend. 
As she brushed her hair out of the tight coil of the curlers she wore to bed, (Y/N) smiled at the sleeping figure of Bea on her bed. The sun had barely started to shine through the curtains, basking her pale body in the warm light of its rays. Her shoulders peeked through the white sheets, rising and falling with the evenness of her breaths. She was a vision of beauty that (Y/N) had been lucky enough to witness. 
By the time the witch was putting on her earrings, Bea stirred from her slumber, a lazy smile tugging at her lips. “Good morning,” she croaked. “You look beautiful.” 
“Hm, I was going for smart,” (Y/N) chuckled. “Is it the necklace or the hair?” 
“It’s your face,” the girl smiled. “You could play hooky, you know. Spend the day with me rather than at the university.” 
“A rather tempting offer,” she said as she walked toward the bed, crawling to Bea. “But I’m too close to graduating now. I’ve already had to argue with enough men who believe that higher education is no place for a woman.” 
“Well, in that case, give them hell,” Bea smirked. “I suppose I should do my own studying then. I do have a test this week and have gone to three classes at the most. I just don’t see the point if I’m going to stay here. Magic doesn’t require human schooling.”
“But the coven does need to change with the times. We need to strive for better. For bigger,” (Y/N) explained. “Living in the woods is amazing, but it keeps us secluded. Alienated. We need to find ways to blend in with society. Hide in plain sight. That’s the key to survival.” 
“You’ve always had great plans for the coven. You will make a wonderful High Priestess one day.” 
“One can only hope,” she sighed contentedly. “But for now, I can do my part in gaining more knowledge of how the outside world works. Find a way witches and other supernaturals can live amongst humans undetected. There may not be as many, but you know there are still people out there that hunt our kind. I mean, just last week, we received word of a coven in Louisiana being burnt down by so-called Modern Witch Hunters. We’ve learned to hide, but clearly not well enough.” 
“Cruelty will always be an incurable sickness in humans,” Bea grumbled. “People in high school taught us that early on.” 
The memory made (Y/N) grimace. They hadn’t done anything wrong. Stood by their respective lockers, the two girls had simply been talking and decided to sneak a soft caress. (Y/N) had only brushed a stray ringlet of hair that had fallen over Bea’s eyes. But her fingers had lingered too long, and their stare was a little too intense. A pair of boys had been walking down the hallways at that precise moment and had decided that what the girls were doing was too queer for their liking. 
Deeming (Y/N) as the instigator, they had snatched her and carried her to the nearest dumpster while calling her a slew of slurs and insults. All this while Bea cried and begged them to stop. It took everything in them both not to use their powers, knowing the punishment for using magic with humans was magic binding for an undetermined amount of time. 
As the lid closed above her and the smell of trash engulfed her, (Y/N) promised never to show an ounce of affection to her friend outside of the protective confines of their coven. There, no one questioned or talked in whispers –although some eyes did follow them at times. But it was nothing like the treatment they endured outside. A couple of stares here and there was nothing like finding dead animals stuffed in your locker, or being unable to walk down the street without being accompanied by a big enough group, or having to stay as far away from your best friend as possible because you don’t know who will attack you for what they believe. 
“You know, Annabeth is leaving in July,” Bea said, changing the topic as she saw how it upset (Y/N). “She was accepted to the University of Tennessee. She says there’s something about the state that calls to her, but I don’t understand why she would go so far. There are enough good schools nearby.” 
“Well, she’s setting her own path,” (Y/N) smiled, brushing a strand of hair behind Bea’s ear. “Your sister has always been quite the free spirit.”   
“That she is,” she chuckled. “Momma is going with her to help her settle in and everything. She also wants to make sure she’s comfortable with the coven over there.” 
“Would you go with her if she asked?” 
“And leave you up here all alone?” the girl scoffed. “Wouldn’t even think about it for a second.” 
“All you’d need is a big enough body of water, and you could come here anytime.”
“Are you suggesting that I leave, (Y/N) Carmine? Do you not want me here?”
“Oh please, don’t even say that. But she is your sister, Bea,” (Y/N) laughed. “You could at least pretend to ponder over the idea. Your family has always been so close-knit.”
“She’d understand,” Bea shrugged with a mischievous smile. “I’ve got something special here.” 
“You’re bad,” she grinned before kissing the girl’s temple. “And I’m going to be late.” 
“Fine,” Bea conceded. “I’ll let you go as long as you bring me some doughnuts.” 
“Of course. I wouldn’t dare come home without them.” 
“Good,” she beamed. “Then, I guess you can go.” 
It was simplicities such as those that (Y/N) reveled in. She may not have been allowed to hold Bea’s hand in public or even say how much she loved her, but she had their home. Behind those four walls, they were able to simply exist. No labels to concern themselves with, no judgment, and certainly no harassment. 
As the day trickled by and class after class passed, (Y/N) couldn’t help but have her mind divided between her education and the girl waiting for her at home. Everything reminded her of Bea. The black fabric of the chairs she sat on was the same color as her hair, the blue of the sky matched perfectly with the iciness of her eyes, and the smell of the town’s bakery reminded her of the girl’s favorite treat. 
There was nowhere she could turn that didn’t remind her of Beatrice, and there was no one on Earth she could love more than her
 at least, that’s what she believed at that moment. By then, she had no idea her soul was bound to an immortal, nor that her life would go on after Bea passed one day. At that moment, she knew only of the fleetingness of life and the importance of living in the present. There was no way for her to know how fleeting those moments were when eternity came into play. 
For now, she enjoyed every second she had in the life she believed was passing.
She was coming out of the bakery when she was met with Russell Morgan, a witch from their coven who had always been kind and concerned over her and Bea. She knew he’d always had his eye on Beatrice, leaving flowers and trinkets on their porch for her. Though he understood the relationship the girls shared, he couldn’t help the affinity he held for the young witch. And none of it bothered (Y/N). Bea had made her choice, and it had been her. 
“Hello, Russ,” she smiled as he matched her pace, knowing he was escorting her home without mentioning it. “How was your day today?” 
“Can’t complain,” he chuckled. “Just making it through this last semester. Hoping I hear back from med school any day now. That’s been the most stressful thing.” 
“I’m sure you’ll get in,” she said. “You’re brilliant, Russ. They’d be lucky to have you. And you know New Forest witches seem to do well in medical school.” 
“Well, we do have a certain je ne sais quoi,” he laughed. “And, uh, how’s Bea been recently? I haven’t seen her as much in lessons.” 
“You know her. Most days, she doesn’t even want to get out of bed,” she smiled. “But I’ve already made a deal with her. For every day that she attends lessons, I’ll bring her a new pastry from the bakery.” 
“That will definitely get her there,” Russell chuckled. “And Margaret won’t be angry at her.” 
“Oh, Margaret’s a big softie at heart.” 
“She really is. And uh, are you two still
” 
(Y/N) knew he wouldn’t get the words out. He never did. “Yes. Bea and I are still,” she chuckled softly. “Don’t think that’s changing any time soon.”
“Well, not that I’m not happy for you two, but a man can only hope,” he said as his cheeks grew red in slight embarrassment. She knew he meant nothing by it and also understood the pull Bea held. “I do hope for you years of happiness. Even if the world hasn’t caught up to different kinds of love.”
“I know, Russ. And I am grateful for your wishes and your friendship. I know one day you’ll meet a woman as wonderful as you.” 
“I sure hope so. Mom is on me about giving her grandkids already. Apparently, the two kids my sister has already given her are not enough.” 
“No amount will ever be enough,” she laughed. “But she might be closer than you think, Russ.” 
And neither of them had any idea how true the statement was. 
Back at the house, the smell of fresh bread and beef stew filled the air. The scent alone made (Y/N)’s stomach grumble, knowing the flavor would be even better than the smell. The dinner table was already set, complete with a set of flickering candles. 
“What’s the occasion?” (Y/N) smiled as she kissed Bea’s cheek. “Everything looks so beautiful.” 
“Do we need an occasion to have a candle-lit dinner?” Bea said. “I just felt like it. Especially since you brought me some of my favorite doughnuts.” 
“Maybe I should bring you doughnuts every day.” 
“I wouldn’t be opposed to that,” she grinned. “And if they’re sugar doughnuts, even better.” 
“Do you really think I’d bring you any others?” 
“Better not,” she laughed. “But I just wanted to do something nice for you. Because I love you, and you deserve it.” 
“You’re the best, Bea,” (Y/N) beamed. “I love you more than the moon loves the sun.” 
With a flick of her hand, music filled the kitchen, and their bodies swayed to the rhythm that played through the radio. They swirled through the room, forgetting the stew that bubbled on the stove and the candles that were melting on the table. But they didn’t care. All they cared about was the fact that they were happy, they were healthy, and they were together. They filled a house with love and joy, and that seemed enough. 
“Do you think there will ever be a way we could have kids?” Bea asked absentmindedly. “I know it couldn’t really happen naturally. But maybe adopting.”
“I don’t think that could happen, Bea,” (Y/N) sighed. “At least not us together or even as single women living together. The world isn’t ready for that, darling.” 
“Oh, what a tragedy,” she sighed. “You would be a great mother.” 
“As would you, Beatrice,” the witch smiled sadly. “Is that something you really want? Children, I mean.” 
“Well, it had always been my dream to have a big family. Little ones running around, a home, someone to grow old with,” she admitted. “I just thought it was the normal way life would move toward.” 
“But I can’t give you all of that, Bea,” (Y/N) sniffled. She stopped their swaying and rested her forehead against Bea’s, a thin stream of tears falling down her eyes. “I can’t give you everything you’ve dreamed of.”
“Well, darling, I don’t want any of that if it’s not with you,” she assured. “I am perfectly content with just having you for the rest of my life.” 
“I want you to have everything you’ve ever dreamed of, Beatrice. I don’t want you to settle just for love. What if, one day, you wake up and realize that love isn’t enough for you? That kids and marriage is what you wanted all along.” 
Bea smiled warmly then, cradling (Y/N)’s face and wiping away the tears that stained her cheeks. “And what makes you think that your love is not enough?” she cooed. “I would wait a thousand years if it meant I got to live my life with you. Children are never a sure thing. Even if I married a man, there is no certainty that I could fall pregnant. But, with you, I know there is love. That is certain, and that is what I need.”
She sealed her words with a chaste kiss to (Y/N)’s lips, slipping through her mouth all the love she felt for her best friend. It was a promise of a future together, a promise of forever. But how could they have known that forever would not have been long enough? That the end of their forever was just around the corner. 
“Now, why don’t we sit and eat already?” Beatrice smiled.”I’m starving.” 
“Alright then,” (Y/N) said. “Let’s eat, and cheers to forever then.” 
“Cheers to forever.”
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andreafmn · 2 months
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Running in Circles | Chapter 10
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Word Count: 2.7K Warnings: mentions of death, religious trauma
Summary: (Y/N) Rossi is following in her father’s footsteps by joining the BAU team as a profiler. The girl genius knew almost everything but she could have never predicted falling for Aaron Hotchner, her boss, and her father’s friend. in their world mutual feelings are not enough to push them together. Will all the adversities and obstacles they face pull them together or push them apart forever?
A/N: a few days behind is better than a whole year đŸ«Ł anywho very sentimental chapter ahead
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Winter had come at full force that December, and maybe that was the first sign of all that was to come. But for (Y/N), it only signified the anniversary of her mother’s death.
Just like she had done every year before, she had taken that day off, knowing her mind would be elsewhere, and her body would want to be there. Even if it fell on a weekend, she had to be sure that no calls would disturb the day. The monsters could wait one more day.
She looked herself over in the mirror. The turtleneck she had chosen felt particularly choking, her pants hung too low for comfort, and her mother’s necklace stood out too brightly against the dark clothing. Nothing was right. Nothing would ever be right. She pushed her hair behind her shoulders and sighed. That was as good as it would ever get.
She slipped her coat on before she left her house, and she wondered what her mother would have thought of her home. Would she have wanted her closer to the family home? Would she have liked the décor? Would she have poked fun at how messy the house could sometimes get, or would she not have cared at all?  Those were answers she would never get. At least not from the one person that mattered the most.
Her father’s car was waiting outside for her, his face wearing a similar solemn look to the one she had. It was the same routine every year. He’d come to pick her up, they’d go to the cemetery, and when David would tell stories of Iris, she would listen. Because she had none to share of her own. She had no memories, no stories, nothing to know of her mother that was her own.
“Hey, dad,” she said as she jumped into the SUV. “It’s a cold one today.”
“It really is,” he chuckled softly “I brought you some coffee and a butter croissant. Something tells me you didn’t eat breakfast today.”
“You know me too well, dad,” she snickered, taking the warm cup between her hands to heat her freezing hands. “Did you eat already?”
“Had myself a bowl of oatmeal with berries and bananas like your mom used to like,” he replied. “Washed it all down with some coffee and came here.”
“That’s good,” she croaked, forcing a smile. “Were you able to get the flowers? My local shop was closed when I went by yesterday.”
“Yeah. I’ve got the bouquet back there,” he smiled. “Peonies, irises, roses, lilies, and baby’s breath. All the ones she liked.”
Every time her father said things like that, her heart broke just a little more. He didn’t know it. She would never say it. But the fact that he had lived a life with her mother when she didn’t even know what she sounded like hurt. It pained her to miss a person she never had a chance to remember.
“Do you know it was your mom that would call you little bird?”
“Did she?”
“She said you were always jumping around and fleeting from flower to flower when you were outside, just like a hummingbird would. That’s why she got that necklace made for you,” David chuckled at the memory. “Even when you were just a little baby, you always seemed to calm when you were with her in the garden.”
“Well, her garden has to be the best one in all of Virginia. Even to this day.”
“You have Emile to thank for that,” he laughed. “If it had been up to me, it would have died so many years ago.”
“And I guess I inherited your lack of a green thumb.”
“That you did, little birdie,” he said. “But you did inherit her good taste. For your third birthday, the last one with your mother –may God have her in his glory—you insisted on having a garden fairy party. Iris asked you what flowers you wanted everywhere, and you said peonies. Well, at the time, you called them peenies.”
“I
 I don’t remember that,” she stammered. “I wish I did.”
“That’s okay, little bird. We have the pictures, and I’m sure there’s a VHS somewhere with the video. Just have to check in storage, which might take a bit more than it should.”
“It wouldn’t if you let me organize it, dad. I’ve told you many times that you need to set up a system so things don’t get lost in all the junk you still have from the olden days.”
“Hey! You learned a lot from those olden days,” he pouted. “Those olden days paid for everything we have.”
“Doesn’t mean it’s not disorganized.”
By the time they had reached the cemetery, they were a mix of laughter and sadness, coupled with the most beautiful bouquet they’d brought to date. There was a thin blanket of snow covering the ground, a cold breeze whistling through the air. It was a horrible day to be out, but they wouldn’t miss it for the world.
(Y/N) was expecting the bad weather. And although her coat did nothing to warm her against the wind, she hugged it closer to her body. What she was not expecting was to find Hotchner and Jack waiting on a bench right in front of her mother’s grave.
“Aaron,” David called out with a smile that alerted the father and son to their presence. “Didn’t expect to see you here.”
Once they were near enough, Jack took off on a soft run toward the woman. “(Y/N)!” he called as he reached to hug her. “You said we could come, remember?”
“Of course I do, buddy,” she smiled softly. “I’m happy to see you.”
“This is your mom, right?” The boy led her to her mother’s tombstone by the hand. “Iris Jensen.”
“That’s right,” she said. (Y/N) knelt down and ran her hand across the picture of her mother, tears already building in her eyes. “This is my mom.”
“She’s very pretty.”
“She is, isn’t she?” (Y/N) chuckled as her body betrayed her. Tears fell down her eyes before she could stop them, warming her skin before turning freezing under the weather. Jack quickly reached into his jacket, pulled out a blue handkerchief, and handed it to her. “Thanks, kid.”
“Jack, why don’t you join me on the bench, and I can tell you about her?” David said. “I’ve got some great stories.”
“Is that okay, (Y/N)?”
“Of course, Jack,” she smiled. “Go ahead.”
As the kid ran to her father, Hotchner wrapped his arms around her. Normally, she would have grown flustered at the interaction, but at that moment, she needed the comfort. “You okay?” he asked quietly. “This must be so hard.”
“I don’t know why I’m like this,” she muttered. “It’s been years already. I barely even knew her.”
“She was still your mom, (Y/N). It’s only natural that you feel this way.”
“I don’t even remember what she sounds like,” the woman sniffled. “I don’t even know what kind of mom she would have been growing up.”
“I
 I’m sorry, (Y/N). I don’t know what to say.”
“It’s okay,” she smiled softly as she let him go. She got on her knees and started cleaning the tombstone, removing all specs of snow regardless of how futile it may have been. “There’s not much to say.”
“All I know is that I wish I had met her.”
“Yeah,” she chuckled. “Me too.”
Aaron left her by herself then, allowing her the space to tell her mother about the year that had passed. She told her about her cases, told her about her friends, and even told her about her ever-growing feelings for an unmentionable person. But, most of all, she told her about how much she missed her.
But it didn’t go over her head how she missed someone that much without really knowing who they were. She carried inside an emptiness that wasn’t easily filled, and as hard as her father tried, never would be. And David tried, in his own way. He had his own grief to carry, and she knew that. She knew he hurt and wished Iris was still with them. But he’d found solace in the time he had shared with her while (Y/N) yearned for even just a second more with her mom.
“I wish you were here, mom,” she cried as she stood. “I see videos of you, and I can’t tell if that’s what you really sounded like or if your voice is too distorted by the camera. I wish you’d had more time, mom.”
“You and me both, little birdie,” her father said as he joined her. “But she’s in God’s glory now.”
(Y/N)’s blood boiled at that moment. She had never been religious, much to her father’s dismay. More than just the deity not fitting into her scientific mind, she couldn’t believe in a god like her father did. Normally, she didn’t mind his religious interjections. They were a part of who he was, and she didn’t want to belittle his beliefs. But that day, something inside her couldn’t stand it. Much less when he started to mutter a prayer.
“I’ve asked you to please not pray aloud when we’re here, dad. Do you mind?”
“Honey
”
“No, dad. I really don’t want to listen to you talk about your god or ask to have mom in his infinite mercy. I don’t wanna hear about it!” Her tone came out harsher than she intended, but she couldn’t contain herself. Years and years of bottling up her feelings had her at her limit, and it was that moment that they had chosen to spill over. “Just, keep it in your head.”
“I don’t understand, (Y/N). You never minded before,” David muttered. “There was a time you used to believe in God. You even used to ask me to pray with you.”
“Jesus, dad, I did that for you.” As she exclaimed Hotch told Jack to wait for him in the car, that (Y/N) needed a moment to herself. Hesitantly, the boy followed his father’s instructions and walked the short trail to the van. All he could understand was that (Y/N) was upset. Once Jack was gone, she continued. “How could I ever believe in a god that took my mother away before I could even remember what my name sounded in her voice? I only went along with it because it seemed to make you happy, but I can’t anymore. I can’t listen to another word of how your god is merciful and how it was all his plan. He took my mother from me. How could I believe in a god that would take a mother from a child? All the memories I have of her are from behind a screen or moments lived by other people. I don’t remember anything about her that’s mine only, dad. You always tell me how you would love to have a second chance with my mom, and I didn’t even get one.”
(Y/N) crumbled to the ground once more and suddenly felt arms around her. Instantly, she knew who it was and found herself sinking into Hotch’s embrace. He tried his best to calm her, telling her that everything would be okay and that she wasn’t alone. She was normally the strong one. She was always the one who kept it all inside and helped others. But too many years of that had her shattered on the ground of the cemetery.
It took a few minutes for her sobs to finally subside, Hotch’s soothing circles on her arms working overtime to calm her down. They had ended up sitting on the cold ground, the snow slowly making its way through their clothes, but neither seemed to care. All that mattered was the comfort and the presence. Nothing else.
“You okay?” Hotch whispered as she finally seemed to calm. “Feeling better?”
“I don’t even know,” she chuckled weakly. “Your pants are dirty now. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry, I have a washer,” he joked. “But how are you feeling? I know this must be a very overwhelming situation.”
“I don’t know what I’m feeling, honestly,” she sighed, sinking into the warmth of Hotchner. “It’s the first time I’ve ever blown up like that toward my dad, and I don’t know why I did. It’s been over twenty years that we’ve been coming here, and I’ve never acted like this.”
“I think it’s safe to assume you’ve been bottling up all these feelings for all that time. They were bound to come out one day or another.” 
“Don’t profile me, Hotch,” she pouted. “But you’re right. I mean, he lost the woman he loved, and even though I lost my mom, I felt bad for him because he’s the one who had all the memories with her. I never wanted him to feel bad or guilty for the fact that I had to grow up without her. Still, every time he says something like her death was god’s plan or that he has her in her mercy, it just sets me off.”
“Have you ever thought that religion is the way that he copes with her death? Maybe thinking that she is in heaven or that it was her time is his way to come to terms with the fact that she is gone.”
“I guess a part of me does understand that. But there’s a side that doesn’t want to,” she sighed. “But I guess I have to apologize for the tantrum.”
“Your feelings are valid, (Y/N). It’s just the way you express them that could be hurtful to others. But your dad’s a big boy,” he chuckled softly. “He’s at the car with Jack. You ready to go over there?” 
“As ready as I can be.”
Hotchner got up first, waiting with his hand extended until she needed it. And with another glance at the tombstone, she took the hand and stood up as well. The man walked beside her the entire time, his presence alone was enough to keep her grounded. As much as she wanted to break down and fall apart, she needed to keep it together.
“And she could spend days in her studio just painting, forgetting that hours passed. She would just lose herself painting and painting,” her father smiled as he talked to Jack. “She would have been there the entire day if I had let her.”
“Do you have any of her paintings still?”
“Of course! All over the house,” he chuckled. “Would you like to see them, Jack?”
“Yes! Can we, dad?” Jack asked as he noticed his father’s approaching figure. “I wanna see the paintings.”
“If it’s alright with Dave, then it’s alright with me.”
“Of course!” the man exclaimed. “The more the merrier. We’ll see you there.”
David and (Y/N) walked to the car in silence. Not saying a single word until they were inside. “I’m sorry, dad,” she finally muttered. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you like I did. You don’t deserve that.”
“I’d say it was long overdue, kid,” he smiled softly. “You like to keep the peace and keep everything in. I’m surprised it hasn’t happened before. You have nothing to apologize for, little bird.”
“But I do, dad. I shouldn’t have yelled at you regardless.”
“Your mother used to say that yelling is the way the soul speaks,” he said. “When you can no longer keep anything in, it comes out fast and unmeasured. Words come out with thorns and spikes. And much like a flower, they don’t mean to hurt you, but it is in their nature to protect themselves. It’s okay to let it out once in a while. Doesn’t matter how it hurts. If my beliefs hurt you, mia bella, all you have to do is tell me. I will try my best to keep it to a minimum.”
“And I will try to talk about how I’m feeling instead of yelling it,” she smiled, taking her father’s hand in hers. “I love you, dad. And I’m still sorry.”
“I love you too, little bird,” he beamed. “And you can make it up to me by helping with dessert tonight. We’re making your mom’s favorite.”
“Tiramisu,” they chorused.
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andreafmn · 2 months
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I'm Not Afraid | Chapter 16
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Word Count: 4.3K
Story Description: (Y/N) Argent arrived at Beacon Hills to put to rest her father’s sister, Kate Argent. For the first time, her family has decided to settle down and sustain a life in this interesting small town. After 17 years, (Y/N) has the opportunity to establish interpersonal relationships but will she be ready to face the complications that come with relating to her cousin’s, Allison, friends; especially, the infamous Derek Hale. She will face the adventure of being associated with the Derek and McCall pack, as well as being faced with the discovery of certain aspects of her life she never imagined.
A/N:  my brain broke trying to figure out the Sheriff Station's layout, and I'm still not sure how it works. I swear, continuity and timelines are Jeff Davis' downfall đŸ« đŸ« 
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The drive hadn’t been long, and it had been just what (Y/N) needed. After feeling like she was suffocating in the hospital, telling her uncle and cousin how sorry she was for their loss and if they needed anything just to ask her, she told her father she’d meet him back at the house and all but sprinted out of the building. The fluorescent lights had birthed a pounding headache into her head, the cries only working to see it further into her brain. She needed to get out before her lungs were soon to follow in the malfunction.
She killed the engine and the light of her motorcycle when she saw him waiting for her outside of the building, his arms already outstretched for the hug she desperately needed. “You okay?” he asked as she crashed into his body. “You don’t look so good.”
“I fucked up, Isaac,” she sighed into his chest. “And you don’t look good either.”
“Yeah, well, I just went through a gruesome transformation under the full moon,” he chuckled softly. “What’s your excuse?”
“My aunt just killed herself, and it was, in part, because of me.”
“Well, okay. You win.” He released her from his hold to find sorry strewn across the girl’s face. Dry tears cling to her skin in lines of grey and fresh ones threatened to spill from her reddened eyes. “Tell me what happened. Why do you think it’s your fault, (Y/N)?”
“The night of the rave, when Derek and I left to get Scott, we found my aunt Victoria slowly killing him with a vaporized version of wolfsbane,” she started. “I thought about fighting her for a second. I’ve been trained well enough that I could have possibly come out alive from that fight, but Derek told me to get Scott —make sure he was okay and, most importantly, not dead. They fought for a bit as I got Scott off the floor, and then, all of a sudden, she was gone. After that, when we were in the vet's office, he told me he bit her deep enough that she would turn on the next full moon.”
“Tonight,” Isaac affirmed. “I haven’t heard either of you do anything wrong yet, (Y/N).”
“A hunter being bitten or scratched deep enough to trigger the transformation is essentially receiving a death sentence,” (Y/N) explained, her voice trembling under the force of her worries. “Argent hunters don’t turn into werewolves, Isaac. They kill themselves before it can happen—that’s part of our code. And that’s what my aunt did tonight. My cousin lost her mother because I wasn’t strong enough to fight her.”
“Hey, that’s not your fault, (Y/N).”
“Why does everyone keep saying that?” she exclaimed. “I had the chance to make things different, and I didn’t. How is that not my fault?”
“Let me ask you this, did you bite here?”
“Isaac
”
“Did you?”
“No,” she grumbled.
“Did you force her to go and kill Scott?”
“Of course not.”
“And did you kill her tonight?”
“No, but
”
“There are no buts,” Isaac affirmed, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her out of her head. “You didn’t do anything wrong, (Y/N). You were in the middle of a difficult situation and made a decision. That’s it. Just like Victoria decided to kill Scott, you decided to save him. And have you ever thought what would have happened if you had been the one to fight her? What if your training isn’t as good as you thought, and hers was better? Maybe there would have been two bodies in the morgue rather than one.”
“It’s just
 seeing Allison and my uncle break down in front of me broke me, Isaac.” The breath she took stammered as the weight of the night fell on her shoulders. Guilt and sadness gripped her body, sinking their claws into her skin and digging themselves a home in her body. “And for some reason, Victoria protected me. She didn’t tell anyone that I had been in the room that night.”
“How did you know she didn’t?”
“Well, firstly, I doubt they would have allowed me to still be here,” she sighed. “And, somehow, I just know. Like I can feel it.”
“Then why are you still feeling guilty? You did absolutely nothing wrong.”
“And yet, Ali now doesn’t have a mother.”
“Because your family goes by really fucked up rules. I mean, sure, being a wolf isn’t all it’s chucked up to be, but it’s not enough to Jill yourself over,” Isaac retorted. “Whatever happened tonight was your aunt’s decision and hers alone. You saved someone she was killing. No one’s punishing you for that.”
(Y/N) dropped to the ground and crossed her legs under her, leaning her back against the concrete wall of the abandoned building. “Sometimes I just feel like every decision I make sets off a domino effect that I can’t control,” she said as Isaac sat beside her. “I’ve made some bad choices in my past that rippled into some pretty awful consequences, and it seems that things aren’t much different here. I just don’t want something worse to happen. I don’t want anyone else to get hurt because of me.”
“No one’s gotten hurt because of you, (Y/N). People make decisions. They make their own choices, and consequences follow. Whether good or bad, something will happen. And just because you are somehow involved in their lives doesn’t mean it’s your fault.” Isaac took her hand in his, running his thumb across her knuckles in a soothing manner. “You know, I found an anchor tonight. Something to tether me to my humanity during the full moon. I told Derek I used the thought of my father as my I don’t know anchor—the father he was before he became the thing of nightmares.”
“Why did you lie?”
He chuckled softly as she rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m pretty sure if I told him the truth, he’d probably kill me,” he said. “It was you, (Y/N).”
“Me? Why me?”
“You’re the first person that ever saw me, (Y/N),” he smiled. “I mean, before you, I went through life just existing. I had no friends, I barely played in the team, and well, nothing at home was good. Without knowing me, you offered to help me with Chemistry and Math, and you even gave me some of your lunch—which you kept doing without giving it another thought. And the more time we spent together, the closer we got. I mean, you let me stay at your place, no questions asked, after my dad died. Even after I shifted and started acting like an ass, you still cared about me. I haven’t had that in a while.”
“If it’s any consolation, I haven’t had a friend in a very long time,” she chuckled. “But, honestly, I’m very glad that it’s you. Not that I have anything against anyone else, but there’s something about you, kid.”
“I’m only a year younger than you,” he laughed, bumping her with his shoulder. “But I am glad I met you, (Y/N). Beacon Hills would have never been the same without you.”
“Well, I’m glad my parents chose this to be our forever home,” the girl smiled as she hugged Isaac’s arm. “I don’t know what I would do without an Isaac Lahey in my life.”
“Thankfully, we don’t have to know,” he chuckled. “And not that I’m ungrateful or anything, but why are you here? I thought you’d be with Derek.”
“Well, not to make you feel bad, but he wasn’t picking up his phone,” (Y/N) shrugged. “I honestly thought he’d be here with you.”
“No, he left a little after tying me up. I thought he left to go see you.”
“He hasn’t even returned my calls,” the girl worried. She lifted her legs slightly and pulled out her phone from her pocket, confirming that Derek had not even texted back. With Isaac not knowing where he was either, worry built inside (Y/N). She chewed on her nails as she let the phone ring and ring, screaming out of frustration when he did not answer. “Something’s wrong. It has to be.”
“Don’t go there. Just keep trying his phone.”
She kept calling his number, getting missed call after missed call, until finally, the call went through. “Derek?” she exclaimed. “Are you okay?’
“Oh, this isn’t Derek,” a voice she sort of recognized answered. “He’s sort of unable to get to the phone right now. But the constant ringing was making me very irritated.”
“Matt? Why do you have Derek’s phone?”
“Well, he’s sort of my hostage.”
(Y/N) wanted to gasp, let fear take over her actions as she received information. But she couldn’t. Not if what she believed was true. “You’re the one controlling the Kanima,” she said. “You’re the one that’s been killing people. Why?”
“Ugh, I would hate to have to repeat the story,” he groaned. “Why don’t you come here, to the sheriff's station? We could all have a little chat.”
“Leave her out of this,” she heard Scott grumble through the phone. And if he was there, (Y/N) didn’t want to know who else he had taken hostage. “Don’t come, (Y/N).”
“Come on, Scott. The more the merrier,” Matt taunted. “Maybe you could bring your cousin here. I really need to talk to her. She broke my heart, you know.”
“What game are you playing, Matt? What do you get out of all of this?”
“Come here and find out.” She could see the devilish smile spreading across his face, his eyes roaming over everyone who was in the station. Scott was there, which could only mean that Stiles also was. With Matt came Jackson. And Derek. But she couldn’t help but feel there were more people there. “Say bye, everyone.”
“(Y/N), don
”
Derek’s strained voice was the last thing she heard before the phone went dead, the hang-up tone filling her ear. She scrambled to her feet as she pulled the keys of her bike from her pocket, hurrying toward her motorcycle as she spoke to Isaac. “Okay, you need to stay with Boyd and Erica, make sure you guys are safe and have a way to communicate,” she instructed, her mind running a million miles a minute. “You need to stay far away from the police station, but you need to make sure your phone is still on.”
“You’re not going there by yourself, (Y/N),” Isaac argued. “Erica and Boyd can hide. I’m going with you.” 
“Absolutely not, Isaac. I’m the only one that can go. I’m immune.” 
“But you’re not invincible. You still bleed and hurt like everyone else. You can get hurt.” 
“And you can get paralyzed.” The rest of her words died in her throat as her phone vibrated with a text from her father. The hunters knew who was inside the station and they were going in for the attack with Allison leading the way. “Look,” she said, showing him her screen. “You need to stay hidden, Isaac. If you get in the way, Allison is sure to kill you. She’s on a rampage.”
“And what do you think will happen to you?”
“She doesn’t know I was there.”
“But she will know when you protect Derek. Even your dad told you to stay away.”
“Allison wouldn’t kill me.”
“How do you know?”
His words swam through her head, and, truthfully, she had no way of knowing if Allison would turn on her. She had seen firsthand how her cousin was fine with being passive-aggressive toward her, and she knew the sting of her words. But could she ever go as far as to hurt her? She had just lost her mother, and (Y/N) couldn’t have a single clue what was running through her head.
She could bide the words of Derek, Scott, and her father. They were worried, she knew that. But people’s lives were at stake, and she didn’t think she could just sit idly by. Especially not with Allison having an open season for Derek. If she could at least help him, she had to try.
“Think about it, (Y/N),” Isaac tried to reason one last time. “You have no idea what you’re walking into here. And you shouldn’t be going alone.”
“I have to help, Isaac. And you need to hide,” she restated. “If you guys need a place to lay low where no one will think you would be, lock yourselves in my room. The window is open, and no one would expect you to be there. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“(Y/N)
”
“I promise I’ll be careful, okay? I just need to know that you’ll be safe.”
“Do you at least have a weapon on you? You’re sort of facing a lizard person and a killer, so I don’t think your fists are gonna be enough.”
With a grin on her face, she lifted the back of her shirt, exposing the gun that had been tucked away in the waist of her jeans. Then, she lifted the leg of her pants to show the knife holster on her ankle. “I never leave the house unprepared, Isaac,” she said. “And well, my dad gave me the gun before I left the hospital. Just in case. You do know there’s a lizard man running rampant around town.”
“Just be safe, (Y/N),” Isaac sighed as he wrapped her in a hug. “And let me know as soon as you’re out of the police station.”
“I will,” she assured. “Get to my house. Lock the door to my room. If Brody gets angsty just get him a treat from my bookcase. I’ll knock three times so you know it’s me, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Stay safe, Lahey.”
“You too, Argent.”
(Y/N) sped as fast as she could toward the station, thankful that she had beaten the hunters there. Just not for too long.
As she killed the engine of her bike and hid it from view, black SUVs rolled into the parking lot. Hunters jumped out of the cars, guns strapped to their chests. Two of them rounded the building, probably to kill the power, while two more stood with Gerard, aiming at the station’s windows.
There were only two things (Y/N) could do. She could remain hidden and somehow sneak past the hunters and into the building, or she could pretend that she was meant to meet there with them. For some reason, she chose the latter.
“Ah, (Y/N),” Gerard was the first one to see her as she neared the group. “I’m glad to see you here. I assume Henry has brought you up to date.”
“Yeah. That’s why I’m here.”
“And where were you? I assumed you would meet us at Chris’ home.”
“I was almost back home when dad texted. Figured I’d come here where I was needed.”
“A true Argent at heart,” he smiles. The way the corners of his mouth extended sent shivers down her spine, and she thought that maybe he knew everything that had happened. But there was no chance
 right? Victoria wouldn’t have confided in him
 right? Those were things she could not know. “Well then, you’re with us. I assume you have something other than yourself to protect you.”
“Of course,” she replied, pulling out her gun. “A hunter is always prepared.”
“Very good,” he chuckled proudly. “Now, we are going for Derek Hale. If anyone stands in our way
 well, so be it. That’s Allison’s plan.”
“So be it,” (Y/N) chorused, swallowing the fear that threatened to strangle her. “I’m ready.”
“That’s good to hear.” Suddenly, the sound of electricity being killed filled the air. Gerard turned toward the pair of hunters and instructed them to start shooting the second the power inside turned off. They let their weapons run without caring who or what they were hitting, their one goal was intimidation and fear. "Shakespeare wrote that love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs. Let’s show them some love.”
At his instruction, the same hunters released gas bombs through the shattered windows, making it easier to conceal them as they walked inside. If innocent bystanders got hurt, then so be it. It was war, nothing else mattered.
“(Y/N) and I will walk in through the front first,” Henry said. “You three follow through the back. We have no idea who else is in there right now/”
“Okay,” Allison nodded. “Be careful.”
“Of course.”
“And Derek? He’s mine.”
The words made (Y/N)’s veins burn. Allison wasn’t there to defend anyone, or even coming in to save her own boyfriend and her friend. She was there for blood. (Y/N) could see it in her eyes.
She walked alongside her father as they snuck in through the dark back door, trying their best to keep silent, her hands extended before them as they cleared the area they walked through. Her chest heaved in anticipation, and nerves ran inside her like a rampage. There was no way to know what they were walking into, but she did know who she had to walk out with.
“You go get your friend,” her father whispered. “I’ll keep moving to the back exit to join them.”
“What if they figure you out, dad?”
“I’ve been doing this for far longer than you have,” he chuckled quietly. “You don’t have to worry about me, kid.” 
With a soft smile and a nod, they walked into the fog. As soon as they were out of view, (Y/N) took the front position, blinking away the sting from the smoke. “Derek?” she called out as quietly as she could. “Derek, where are you?”
Doors slammed shut and broke right after, glass and wood bursting through the ground, and all (Y/N) could hope was that none of it was masking the sound of anyone getting hurt. Well
 at least not anyone she cared about.
“Derek,” she continued to call as she cleared the reception area and the front offices, trying her hardest to see through the darkness and the cloudiness. “Please, where are you?”
“Over here,” she finally heard him croak out. “I’m here.”
She followed the sound of his voice until she found him trying to lift his body with a chair. He struggled under his own weight as his limbs came back alive slowly, too slowly. “Oh god, Derek,” she said as she ran to help him up. “Your leg is bleeding.”
“I’m fine,” he groaned slightly. “Do you have a knife?”
“Excuse me?”
“I need you to stab me.”
“Are you crazy?!”
“I already triggered the healing process in my body,” he said. “I just need something to make it work faster.”
Without giving it much thought, (Y/N) slid to her ankle and pulled out her knife. “Where?” she asked before Derek pointed to his leg. “Please don’t hate me.”
She drew her arm back and punched the blade onto his thigh, her cut joining the five smaller ones he had created. A growl left his body as she pulled out the knife, his face transforming and his eyes glowing red. He breathed heavily as he steadied himself, swallowing the pain from the stab as feeling returned to the rest of his body.
“We need to get you out of here,” she said. “My family is here to kill you tonight.”
“I can’t,” he said. “I’ve gotta get to the holding cells. “There’s people that need help.”
“If Allison finds you, she’ll shoot to kill, Derek,” (Y/N) stated. “Her mom killed herself tonight, and she knows it’s because you bit her. Allison blames you for Victoria’s death.”
“I’m not leaving until they’re safe,” he retorted. “And your cousin is the least of my worries.”
“Fine,” the girl relented. She knew there was no fight to be won. The faster they rescued whoever else was in there, the faster they could go. “Lead the way.”
He took off in a fast walk down hallways and doors, keeping an arm behind him to shield (Y/N). “I’ll go for Jackson. You go for Matt,” he whispered. “Maybe we have a chance that way.”
“Jackson can’t paralyze me.”
“But he sure as hell can hurt you. Or
”
“Okay,” she stopped him. “I’ll try and get Matt.”
As they neared the cells, she could hear Scott’s mother begging for her son’s life, and all Matt could do was chastise her for not knowing what her son was. But his words soon died in his throat as Derek growled menacingly.
For a second, she believed she had him. With her gun outstretched in front of her, she walked tentatively toward Matt. His eyes flickered from side to side until, finally, they stopped beside him. Out of the darkness, the Kanima appeared and sank his claws into her arm, sending her flying against the wall. The air got knocked out of her lungs, and pain shot through her entire back.
Derek grabbed Jackson and slammed him on the desk, the distraction allowing Matt to escape. But not without (Y/N) shooting his right shoulder. Or maybe his arm. Her vision had been blurry, but she knew she had at least grazed him. The groan that had left his mouth told her so. But (Y/N) couldn’t dwell on him any longer, by the time she’d be able to work up the strength to run, he’d be long gone. What she could do was help the people in the room she was in.
Wolf and Kanima battled as they each fought for dominance, but Jackson was just too strong and too fast. His body was too close to the cell, and the girl knew she couldn’t risk shooting him. One wrong move, and she’d hit Melissa or the sheriff. All she could do was fight him head-on and hope for the best.
She slipped the knife out of her ankle once more and rushed Jackson from the back, digging the knife just below his ribs and pulling up. But all that did was anger him more. With extended claws, he slapped her across the face, sending her barreling to the ground once more. The sting from her arm didn’t even compare to the sting on her face and the bounce her head did off the ground. It was stupid to fight him hand-to-hand, but she had to at least try.
An angry growl escaped Derek as he got off the floor and saw (Y/N) holding her head. Without thinking, he ran toward Jackson, with all the intent of knocking him like he had done to her. But he used the bars of the cell to lift his body and kick Derek straight to the chest and across the room.
Suddenly, as the Kanima hissed in Melissa’s face, Scott appeared and stuck his claws into the creature's ribs and pulled him off the bars. After being unhanded, Jackson slithered out the door, possibly in search of his fleeing master.
Derek jumped over the desk that kept her from (Y/N) and helped her up before signaling to follow him. They ran through the halls, but if there was any sign of Jackson before, it was gone. “Fuck!” the man grumbled. “He’s gone.”
“I’m sorry,” she croaked. “I shouldn’t have gotten in the way. I
”
“Shh,” he interrupted.
“Derek, I
”
“There’s someone there.”
He pressed them flush against the wall, his arm draping protectively in front of her. They didn’t know who it was, but it wouldn’t take long to find out.
“What are you doing here?” Scott’s voice echoed down the hall. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this.”
“Trust me, I’m aware of that.”
Gerard. A gasp threatened to escape her mouth, and (Y/N) clamped her hands on top of her mouth to muffle any sound. The last thing she would have ever guessed was that Scott was working with her grandfather.
“I’ve done everything you asked for,” Scott continued. “I joined Derek’s pack, I’ve given you all the information that you wanted, I told you Matt was controlling Jackson
”
“And leave him to us,” Gerard interjected. He told Scott everything he wanted to hear but gave away just one crucial thing. He would be the one to handle Matt and Jackson. Not the hunters. Gerard. “Go!”
Scott ran past the pair, unaware they had heard everything. Derek’s face had fallen in shame, his entire demeanor dropping as he realized he’d been betrayed. But the defeat only lasted a second as his attention turned to (Y/N).
“Are you okay?” he asked as he looked her over. Blood dripped down her cheek and her arm, and some stained the hair on the back of her head. “You’re bleeding.”
“I’m fine,” she sighed. “I’m sorry. About all of this. I
”
“Not now, okay,” he said softly. “You need to get home. Clean those wounds up. Do you feel dizzy? Nauseous?”
“No, I feel fine,” (Y/N) grumbled. “Listen, Derek.”
“I need to get you home,” he continued, still interrupting everything she had to say. “You need to go.”
 “What’s going on, Derek? Is it about what Scott said? I mean
”
“No. I just
,” he sighed, but the words seemed to die in his throat as he tried to get them out. “Let’s just get you home. Did you come here on your bike?”
“Yeah.”
“Give me the keys,” Derek said, extending his hand. “I’ll drive you home and come get my car after. Are your parents there?”
“My dad’s here, and my mom’s waiting at my uncle's house.”
“Good. Let’s go.”
(Y/N) followed without much fight. Her body was filled with exhaustion, and she barely had the energy to walk to her bike. But she couldn’t help the dread that slipped into her as she clung to Derek’s waist. He wasn’t just saddened by Scott’s actions. There was a fear inside him that ran deeper than betrayal, and it scared her to think that it had anything to do with her.
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andreafmn · 2 months
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Speak | Chapter 23
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Word Count: 3.1K
Summary: Bella Swan was a disaster when Edward had left. Deciding she needed a little help, Charlie Swan receives with open arms his younger daughter (Y/N) Swan. She helps Bella during her depression and becomes inseparable from her long-lost friend Jacob. What she didn’t expect was falling for a hotheaded short-tempered silver wolf.
A/N: made some much needed changes to this scene from the book, because this Bella stands up for herself (at least a bit). And, don't hate me, but the fight is coming next chapter plus something you all have been waiting for... đŸ€­đŸ€­ TAGLIST CLOSED 
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Across town, and unaware of the danger her sister had been in, Bella was coming face to face with her past. It had blown in through her front door as though it belonged there. Almost like it had never left.
She wasn’t sure what the best way to react was. For the first time since she encountered them, Bella didn’t want to rush headfirst toward them. As happy as she was to see one of them, she didn’t feel the overwhelming need to be by their side. She didn’t feel the ache in her limbs to run toward the visitor and crash into them for a long-awaited hug. Instead, she remained frozen at the door, staring at the figure of Alice Cullen.
“B-Bella?” Alice stammered as her eyes fell on her. “You’re here. I
”
“Well, it is my house,” she chuckled softly as she shortened the distance between them, studying the vampire’s features under the soft glow of the lamp light. “I should be the one asking why you’re here. Especially in the state that you’re in.”
Her tone wasn’t accusatory, nor was it degrading. It was simply an observation. Where Alice’s eyes should have been a bright golden color, onyx dark orbs stared at the human girl. She could see how she struggled to keep herself from taking unnecessary breaths, how she kept her distance from the girl’s irresistible scent.
“I’m sorry. I haven’t hunted in a long time. I shouldn’t let myself get this thirsty, but I simply had to rush here,” Alice explained. “My surprise, though, Bella, wasn’t that you came home. My surprise is that you’re alive.”
Bella’s breath hitched in her throat at the realization. “You saw me fall.”
“No,” she disagreed. “I saw you jump.”
Before Bella could respond, Alice was speaking again. “I told him something like this would happen, but he didn’t believe me. No. ‘Bella promised,’” Alice scoffed. “‘Don’t be looking for her future,’ he told me. But just because I’m not looking doesn’t mean I don’t see,” she continued. “I wasn’t keeping tabs on you, I promise. It’s just that I’m already connected to you. And when I saw you jumping, I didn’t think, I just had to get here as soon as possible. It would be too late by the time I got here, I knew that much. But I couldn’t just do nothing. I came here thinking I could help Charlie with something, anything. And then you drive up,” she rambled on. Her head shook in confusion, her mind trying to connect the dots as to how Bella was standing right in front of her. “I saw you go into that water, and you didn’t come up, Bella. I waited, and I waited, and you never did. What happened? And how could you do that to Charlie? Did you even think about him? And what about my brother? Do you have any idea what Edward
”
It was then that Bella cut her off. “I wasn’t trying to off myself, Alice.”
“So, you didn’t jump off a cliff?”
“For fun, Alice,” she asserted. “I was at the beach. I was bored. So, I jumped. I had seen some of Jacob’s friends do it, and it seemed like something I might want to try. So, I did it. Just like you didn’t think before coming here, I didn’t really think about how the weather would have affected the water before I jumped in.”
As Alice remained quiet, not quite believing her story, Bella had no chance but to continue. The vampire’s perfect eyebrow cocked as she waited for Bella to keep talking, her hip popped to the side, and her arms crossed against her chest. Something fluttered in the girl’s chest that had never been directed toward any of the Cullens. Annoyance. “Look, sure, if my sister hadn’t pulled me out, I would have most likely drowned,” she said. “She trod water for us until her friend Paul pulled us to the shore. But she did. (Y/N) pulled me out. It couldn’t have been more than a minute since I was under that he did. So, if you saw me jump in, how come you didn’t see either of them get me to safety?”
“Sister? Wait, so someone pulled you out?”
“Yes. My sister saved me.”
“But your sister was back in Florida,” Alice mumbled almost to herself. “And I couldn’t see her?”
“She moved here a couple of months back,” Bella said. “She helped me be happy again after you all left. She abandoned her life in Florida to fix something that she did not break.”
“Bella
”
“Yes, and then Jacob brought me back home after everything that went down,” she sighed softly.
A sudden wave of emotions contorted Alice’s face, ranging from surprise to confusion. She stepped closer to Bella, sniffing her jacket softly before stepping back in slight disgust. Her eyebrows furrowed as thoughts ran through her head before a chuckle left her throat. “Come on, Bella,” she smiled. “Who was that outside with you? It sounded like you were arguing.”
“I told you. Jacob. He’s my friend
 or he was
” But Alice didn’t quite buy what she was saying, and Bella could tell. “What?”
“I-I don’t know,” she stammered. “I don’t know what this all means.”
“Well, at least I’m still here.”
“He was a fool to think you could survive alone,” Alice scoffed softly, still speaking in a tone that made her words hard to hear. But the house was quite silent. “I’ve never met someone so prone to life-threatening idiocy.”
“I survived,” Bella defended. “Despite everything, I survived.”
Still, Alice didn’t listen. “But if the current was too strong for you, and then became too strong for your sister, how was her friend able to pull you both out?”
“He’s strong. Like unnaturally so,” she answered, startled at the topic change. She debated for a second about revealing the pack’s secret. She didn’t know if it was something she could divulge, much less to a vampire. But if the wolves knew everything, there couldn’t be much that Alice didn’t already know, or could even find out on her own. “He’s sort of a werewolf. So is Jake. The Quileutes turn into wolves when vampires are around.”
“Well, I guess that explains the smell,” she muttered. “But not why I didn’t see them? A werewolf? Are you sure about that?”
“Yeah, very,” Bella answered. “I guess you weren’t with Carlisle the first time they met.”
“No, I hadn’t found him yet,” Alice responded, her mind seemed to still be floating with ideas. “And your friend is a werewolf?”
“Yes,” she exhaled. “But he hasn’t been one for too long. Just a couple of weeks.”
“A young werewolf? Even worse! Edward was right—you are a magnet for danger. Weren’t you supposed to be staying out of trouble?”
“There’s nothing wrong with them.”
 “Until they lose their tempers,” Alice judged. “Anyone would be safer after vampires left town. But not you, Bella. You find the next monster you can find.”
Alice’s tone stung Bella, reaching a nerve that hadn’t been reached by any of the Cullens yet. Normally, she would have kept quiet. Hell, the Bella from only a week before would have allowed Alice to continue her chastising of her. But not now. Not after everything that had happened. “You know what, that is enough, Alice,” she burst. “You don’t get to come here after you all abandoned me. You don’t get to judge the decisions I’ve made or the people I choose to spend my time with. You don’t get to waltz in here and tell me that I’m clumsy or that I attract danger. And you sure as hell don’t get to guilt me for doing something that might have hurt Edward. He’s the one who abandoned me. It has never been the other way around.”
The vampire seemed at a loss for words. Bella had never been that vocal about her emotions, much less had she ever faced up to the family she had loved so much it had become an addiction. Had it not been for her sister, she was sure she would have allowed them to come back in the blink of an eye, and she would have welcomed them with open arms. “And you may think that I’m the one that attracts danger, but you were the ones who brought that danger to town,” she continued. “You and your family may have left, but that doesn’t mean there are no vampires here. If it hadn’t been for Jacob and the pack, Victoria would have gotten me by now. If it hadn’t been for them, then Laurent would have gotten me first. So, if you thought you were protecting me by leaving, then you’re dead wrong.”
“Victoria? Laurent?” Alice hissed, completely ignoring Bella’s rant. “Tell me everything. From the beginning.”
And with exhaustion and defeat weighing heavy on her already, she did. Bella skimmed through the first months of the ordeal, not needing the extra judgment that was certain to follow. She told her how she had come face-to-face with Laurent, how the pack had been keeping watch over her and Charlie, and how they had chased her through the woods that very morning. She told her what had happened with Harry Clearwater, worry taking over her as she thought of her father. And finally, she told Alice about (Y/N). About how her sister had selflessly moved in with her and Charlie to help dig her out of the hole she had fallen into. How, even if Bella hadn’t made it easy, (Y/N) had stood beside her every step of the way. Like she had said before, mending something she had not broken.
(Y/N) had been the one thing Bella had been missing without even realizing it. She had never thought in her darkest moment, her sister would be the ray of light that she needed to pull through. Sure, heartbreak was embedded into the marrow of her bones and flowed through the red in her veins, and, sure, her heart still was home to Edward and would always be. But her sister had given her something she seemed to have lost almost two years before. She had found the confidence to be herself and the drive to fight for what she wanted.
“So, our leaving didn’t do you any good, huh?”
“I don’t think it was ever meant to,” Bella retorted. “You guys didn’t “leave” because I wanted you to.”
“But none of that explains why I didn’t see your sister,” Alice muttered, somehow avoiding a real response to Bella’s rant. “Is she human, like you?”
“Yeah.”
“Then why couldn’t I see her? I didn’t see her pulling you out of the water, I didn’t see her being helped by the other wolf. Why?”
“How would I know?” Bella asked. “All I can say is that my sister is definitely human.”
“But there has to be more,” she said as she paced the living room. “I don’t see what I don’t know. I have never been a werewolf, so I wouldn’t be able to see their futures. What is she that I can’t see either?”
“Maybe she’s like me. I mean, Edward can’t read my mind. Maybe it’s something like that.”
“But I can see you in my visions, Bella. I definitely can’t see her,” she stated. “Is there anything else you know about the wolves that you haven’t told me?”
“Nothing.”
“Then, I’ll have to ask around. There has to be more.”
Bella couldn’t believe that was all Alice was interested in. She had poured her heart out and finally had stood up for herself, and all the vampire was concerned about was her inability to see her sister in her visions. Emotions battled inside the Swan girl. She wanted to be excited that Alice was back, but she couldn’t get over that she had only come back because she thought Bella was dead. It hadn’t been to apologize or even to check up on her from afar. The only reason she had concerned herself was because she thought she’d be coming back to no one.
“So, I’m guessing since this was such an impromptu visit, no one else came with you,” Bella said. “Does Edward know you’re here?”
“Uh, no.”
“He’s not with Carlisle and Esme?”
“He checks in from time to time,” she muttered. It seemed it was the only thing she had been able to do. Speaking in low tones and uncertain in the words she spoke. “I was in Denali, visiting Tanya and her family. That’s where I flew in from. Jasper told me it wouldn’t be a great idea to come here, but I just had to see
 I have to say I’m sort of agreeing with him now, but I’m glad to see you’re doing okay, Bella.”
“Okay?” the girl scoffed before she broke into a delusional chuckle. “You want to know how I actually was, Alice? I was a shell of a human for months. The week after you left I didn’t eat, I barely slept –and when I did, the nightmares were so vivid that I screamed and thrashed waking Charlie up. At some point, he said he’d have RenĂ©e come here and drag me back to Florida, but I threw such a tantrum that he promised he wouldn’t.” Tears welled in the corners of Bella’s eyes. It was the first time she admitted what had happened all those months before, and she wasn’t sure if she was doing it just to hurt her or because she needed to let it all out for once. “I threw away CDs, I wouldn’t look at the TV, I wouldn’t even read or listen to music. I was
 empty. That’s when (Y/N) left her life in Jacksonville to come here and help Charlie. My little sister, almost two years younger than me, left everything she knew to help me. I don’t think she knows this, but every day, she would come into my room, and she would talk to me about nothing and everything. She made sure I ate, made sure I visited the shower once in a while, and, most of all, she made damn sure I was okay. Even if all I did was respond in one-word answers or even when I said some things that maybe I shouldn’t have, she kept trying her best to help. “I think if it hadn’t been for her and Jacob, I would have never started to get better,” Bella sighed, wiping away the warm tears that stuck to her cheeks. “Well, not better exactly, but not like there was a gaping hole in my chest. Through it all, and even when I pushed them away at times, they stayed and started fixing what others had broken. And yet, there’s this part of me, Alice, a part that wants him as much as the first time I saw him. A part that keeps waiting for him to come back, and we can pick up where we left off and have the life we used to talk about. It’s the part that keeps this love for him and the family brewing; that wants it all back. But there’s this other part. It’s the part that is growing, thanks to my little sister. I see her, and I can’t help but want to be a better person because of her. I want to be the sister that she needs and deserves. And I couldn’t do that if I kept burying myself in the sadness. As much as I wanted you all back, the drive to be a better sister had to take a front seat.”
Alice remained silent as she finally broke out of her head and started really listening to Bella. The tears that glimmered in the girl’s eyes broke a part of the vampire she didn’t know could. In an effort to keep Bella safe, they had broken a part of her humanity that was taking too long to grow back. “I’m so sorry, Bella,” the pixie-like girl finally broke, crashing her arms around her. “I didn’t
 I never thought you would hurt this much because of us. We really thought we were doing the right thing by you.”
“I know you did,” Bella sniffled, a sad smile tugging at her lips. She pulled away from Alice and took her cold hand in hers. “And the worst part of it all is that I would throw it all away in a second if it meant you all came back.”
“Oh, Bella. I can’t
 even if we wanted to, we
”
“It’s fine, Alice,” she sighed, letting her hands go and wiping away any tears that were left on her skin. “Honestly, it’s okay. And as much as I would love to have you stay, I think it’s time for you to go. Charlie will be here any second now, and I don’t know if he’d be too up for visits with everything that happened with Harry today. And, well, you also need to hunt. I don’t think I’ve ever said this, but you look terrible.”
“You don’t look any better yourself,” she chuckled. “But I should find something to eat.”
“How long will you stay in Forks?”
“After all of that, you still want me to stay?”
“Only if you want, Alice. I can’t decide anything for you,” she smiled softly. “But I do want you to meet (Y/N). I know that if Charlie loves you, so will she.”
“Well, I guess I could stick around for a little while,” Alice responded. “I just want to make sure this is something you actually want, Bella. You’ve obviously come a long way, and I don’t want to undo all that work.”
“I promise it’s fine,” she assured. “Will you come over tomorrow?”
“Do you want me to?”
“Yes, Alice. I told you; I want you to meet my sister,” Bella restated. “It really was good to see you. Even if I just unloaded all of this on you, and I was very hurt when you guys left, it’s still a relief to see you.”
“Well, then, I will see you tomorrow,” Alice smiled as she turned toward the door. “You must know we thought we were doing the right thing by you, Bella.”
“I understand,” she said. “We all do things we think are right without knowing how they’ll affect people around us. I can’t say it’s human nature, but it certainly is people nature. See you tomorrow, Alice.”
“See ya, Bella.”
After she disappeared, Bella heated up some food for Charlie before sitting on the couch to wait for him. She felt a lightness within herself that she hadn’t experienced in a while. She had said words she had been terrified to confess, and she had said them without feeling guilty about them. So, she sat and turned on the TV for the first time in a long time and waited, not knowing that halfway across town, her sister had come face to face with death once more.
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andreafmn · 2 months
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12 Days of Ficmas ❅ Day 9
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Word Count: 2.1K Pairing:  George Weasley x Fem!Reader Prompt: Request for @blackloveangel13 Warnings: foul language
Summary: Everyone that lived through the Second Wizarding War lost something. Most, lost people they loved. George? Well, he lost a part of himself. But he still had the only person that stood by him through it all. And, although she lost people too, there's a ray of hope that comes just in time for the holidays.
A/N: Yup, still going, even well after the holidays. Gonna make sure I finish it even if I make it into the summer đŸ€­đŸ€­
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The problem with life is that sometimes it does go on. It doesn’t care if you’ve lost it all. It doesn’t care what you’re feeling or what you’ve been through. It simply goes on. 
But how could it when George had lost a part of who he was?
The Second Wizarding War had taken a lot from almost everyone in the wizarding world. It had taken friends, it had taken enemies, it had taken allies, it had taken families. And it had taken George’s other half. The one person who had known him better than he knew himself, who had shared every second of his life with, who had brought him closer to the one person he had left that could ever be at the same level as Fred had. 
The war had left him the one person he would need just as much as his twin brother. It had provided him with his silver lining. His beautiful (Y/N). 
She had been his saving grace when all he saw was darkness. She walked beside him when he needed someone to hold on to. She held him in her arms when his mind was too heavy with memories. And she promised him love and understanding for every second they lived. 
The pair had moved in together soon after the war, settling into (Y/N)’s childhood home after her own parent’s passing. Though the walls had been painted and the furniture had been changed, the halls were filled with a darkness that no one could mistake. It made the house feel cold and empty. At another time, she would have sold it to buy a place for her and George to start fresh. But after everything that had happened, she couldn’t find it in herself to get rid of the house her parents had raised her in. 
Time passed –as it does— walking hand in hand with life, and somehow, the holidays were fast approaching. Weasley’s Wizard Wheezers had been busier than ever during that time, forcing them both to focus on the store rather than the upcoming festivities. Neither was truly in the celebrating mood. It would be the first Christmas without the most important people in their lives other than each other, and dread was taking over. 
But the week before Christmas (Y/N) received news that turned her entire world upside down. 
On her free day from the shop, she’d decided the house needed some sprucing up and some joy. She enchanted brooms and mops, making sure the entire house was clean and ready to receive Christmas cheer. Cobwebs were removed, dust was swept, curtains were opened, and spaces were cleared. Her one and only goal was to make sure things were done before George got home. 
She wasn’t sure how her boyfriend would take the transformation of their home. Only a week before, they had agreed on the fact that Christmas would be skipped that year. That the only sign of the holidays would be the gifts they would take over to Molly and Arthur’s home for the family and nothing else. 
But things had changed. 
She had changed. 
Somehow, in only a half day, she had gotten the entire house cleaned and had brought in a giant pine tree into the living room. Lights had been hung on the roof, and enchanted ornaments were slowly making their way onto the tree. 
As (Y/N) worked on a special dinner of braised lamb shanks and creamy mashed potatoes, soft music rang across the room. It made her sway as she listened, feeling the beat fill her body with unimaginable joy. After almost a year of sorrow, it was the first time in a long time she’d felt insurmountable happiness and hope. Most of all, she felt hope.
Suddenly, the front door opened, the bells on the wreath ringing as they moved. “Darling,ïżœïżœïżœ she heard George call out. “What is all this?”
“Oh, sweetheart, you’re home,” she smiled as she placed the lid on the simmering pot. “How was your day?” 
“I thought we had agreed not to decorate for the holidays,” he grumbled, disregarding the change in topic. “This looks quite done up, (Y/N).” 
“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “I just thought maybe we could use a bit of holiday cheer. We’ve had a hard year, and
”
“A hard year?! I lost my fucking brother, (Y/N)!” George exclaimed as he slammed his things onto the kitchen counter. “We fought in a fucking war, and we lost so many people. I don’t think holiday decorations will help with forgetting all of that.”
“I’m not trying to make us forget what happened,” the woman flinched. “I lost people too, George. You’re not the only one suffering here.”
“Well, you definitely have a funny way of showing it,” he seethed. “I don’t wanna see all of this bullshit here, (Y/N). It’s not a happy fucking Christmas.” 
“I know, I was just trying to
”
“You know, it’s hard enough that I have to put on a happy face at the store, but I can’t do it at home too! I can’t. I just can’t!” His voice had raised to a volume it had never before when directed toward her, and it made (Y/N) recoil into herself. Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes as she stepped back from George, a visible pained expression on her face. “I’m taking a walk.” 
“George
”
“I said I’m taking a fucking walk!”
The door slammed behind him, making (Y/N) jump at his sudden outburst. She’d never seen anger like that in him, never even heard his voice rise had it not been out of excitement. It scared and pained her to know there was so much ire stored inside him. She could understand it. She could understand why happiness surging after time passed would make him angry. It had made her angry for a long time as well. But she couldn’t contain herself. Not now when, after so much darkness, she had finally been able to see light. 
As warm tears stained her cheeks, she went back to attend the dinner. Even if George was angry, he still had to eat. She mixed the potatoes and let the lamb simmer before she walked to the dining room to set the table. Her fingers traced the design on the plates, the very ones she had grown up eating out of. They had been a gift to her parents from her grandparents when she had been born, and they had used them every single night since. She followed the gold trim of the plate, drinking in the delicate floral adornations. Every trace reminded her of the laughter that filled the room during dinner time; it reminded her of her father’s corny jokes about whatever food her mother had made and the roll of her mother’s eyes as she smiled at her husband. Never again would she see or hear them, not in a real way. They would live in her heart and her memory, but they would not hold her anymore, nor the child she would have in nine months.  
By the time (Y/N) had served George’s plate, he had walked back into the house, his head dropped in shame and defeat. His auburn hair was covered in white specs of snow, and he let them drop to the floor as his hands ruffled the strands. 
“Hey,” he called out sheepishly, walking slowly toward the dining room. “Looks good.”
“Thanks,” she answered dryly as she pushed her food around the plate. “I made one of your favorites.”
“Yeah, I see,” he said. “Smells great, too. Thank you.”
“Of course. I hope you like it.”
The couple ate in silence; the only sound that filled the room was the scraping of utensils on ceramic. The air around them was heavy, a gripping tension holding their breaths in their throats. Neither wanted to say it, but both were thinking of the tantrum George had thrown. 
“You know, it’s not fair,” (Y/N) finally said, slamming her fork in the table. “Everything you said to me was not fair.”
“I
”
“No, George,” she choked as tears welled up in her eyes. “I lost my parents, I lost my best friend, and somewhere along the line, I lost you too. I know the pain you’re in, darling. I lived every second of that war right by your side, and I am living it now to this day. I know that no amount of time or holiday will ever heal the loss that we’ve suffered, but we cannot keep living as though the ones who died were us. I’m not asking you to move on, George. Much less am I asking you to pretend as though Fred didn’t die. All I want for us is to live. To live for ourselves and for them.”
She stretched her hand to grasp his, squeezing it comfortingly as she saw sobs shake his shoulders. “I didn’t do all this to hurt you, sweetheart. I would never want to hurt you,” she said. “But I found something out today that changed my life. Something that will change our life.” 
“What’re you on about, (Y/N)? What did you learn?” 
“I’m pregnant, George,” she smiled softly. “The reason I have been feeling odd these past couple of days is because we’re having a baby. That’s why I wanted to decorate for Christmas. That’s why I wanted the house not to be riddled with shadows and sorrows. I don’t want to start this new journey carrying the sadness of our past. I want to move with the happy moments we shared with them because that’s what our child deserves. And I know that grief is still heavy in our hearts but
” 
Before she could ramble another word out of her mouth, George had rounded the table and crashed his lips onto hers, not minding the way he had to almost completely bend down to reach her. He cradled her face and kissed her fervently, tasting finally the joy she’d had. “Merlin, I’ve been a downright wanker, huh?” he chuckled as he rested his forehead against hers. “I’m sorry for all the bullshit I said, (Y/N). You didn’t deserve it. And, to be honest, it wasn’t actually directed at you.”
“What happened?” (Y/N) asked softly, caressing his reddened cheek as he knelt before her. 
“Someone confused me for Fred at the store, and it sent me on a downward spiral,” he sighed. “Had to keep it together while I was working, but when I saw the lights outside —they’re pretty, kind you— I just snapped. And you didn’t deserve that. That’s not who I am, sweetheart. You know it’s not.”
“I know, George. And I know those words came from a place of pain,” she smiled. “I know the sweet and caring man that you are, that you’ve always been. It did hurt to hear the way you raised your voice at me and the words that spewed from your mouth. But I knew it wasn’t because of me.”
“Merlin, I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I promise I will never, ever raise my voice at you like that again.” George’s eyes bore into hers, searching for the haven he always found in them. “You are the only thing that has kept me together this past year, and I’m so fucking lucky to have you by my side. I know that, darling. You are my reason for being. You and this little bugger.” 
His hands slipped to her stomach, a tearful smile taking over his features. “In this absolute darkness, my darling, you are hope. You two are the light at the end of this tunnel,” he sniffled. “And I promise that there will never come another moment where you ever doubt how desperately in love I am with you.”
“I never doubted it,” (Y/N) grinned, threading her fingers through George’s. “That love you feel, I feel. The grief, the sorrow, the pain. The happiness, the joy, the laughter. All that you feel, I feel. And our child will, too. This is our new chapter, sweetheart. Our chance to start living again.” 
“And what a privilege it is to have my heart beat at the same time as yours,” he smiled wide as he brought her to her feet and wrapped his arms around her waist. “Thank you for this gift, (Y/N). Come to think of it, it might just be a happy Christmas after all.” 
“Well, it ought to be,” she chuckled, bringing him closer by his neck. “This little one is already causing a ruckus.”
“Takes after his father.”
“And how do you know it’s going to be a boy?” (Y/N) chuckled. “It could well be a girl.”
“It could also be twins.”
“Merlin, that would be a real adventure,” she startled. “But I’m up for it if you are.”
“Darling, I’d go through hell if I had you by my side,” he said before he took her lips once more. “But I do hope it’s just one baby.” 
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andreafmn · 2 months
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Heartbeat | Chapter 17
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Word Count: 4.2K Warnings: foul language, mature themes, medical procedures
Story Description: (Y/N) Marks had no free time. From studying for med school, working her rounds for clinical, and the occasional babysitting her sisters sprung on her, she was all booked up. But none of that stopped her from aiding her sister and their best friends to rob a grocery store. She could have never guessed those couple of minutes would be enough to change her life forever or that it would lead to her meeting the man that would catalyze that shift.
A/N: this is a very long, bilingual medical chapter, so beware. All Spanish is in italics and the English translation is right next to it in bold. I hope y'all don't get too lost. Also, wow, translating this almost killed me 😅😅 thankfully, I don't know any other languages to incorporate in my stories
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Rio and (Y/N) sped down the hallway, hot on Twitch’s trail. If it hadn’t been for him, (Y/N) was sure a shouting match would have gone down in his office. She seethed at the thought that Rio had involved her family in his business, but it hurt her more that no one thought she was capable of handling that information. Because of that, her anger was evenly distributed between her sisters and him.
“We’re not done talking, by the way,” she said as she wrapped the stethoscope she had fished from her bag around her neck. “I intend to find out what the fuck you’re doing working with my sisters.”
“Yeah, didn’t think so,” he scoffed. “But I don’t owe you explanations.”
“Well, you’re still gonna give them.”
Twitch stopped at the doors of what had been an empty storage space the last time she had seen it. Worry was seen into the man’s furrowed brows, tears threatening to fall from his eyes. (Y/N) couldn’t help the dread that washed over her as she stared into his eyes. Whatever his uncle had seemed to be serious, and she worried she didn’t have the knowledge or the skills to help him.
“Tell me what’s going on, Twitch,” (Y/N) said as she tied her hair up. “What am I walking into.”
“Uh, my cousin Elena called me like half an hour ago to tell me that my uncle was not feeling well,” the man started, his words trembling with fear. “He had been complaining that he was having some chest discomfort and a bit of shortness of breath for the last couple of days, but it got really bad tonight. She told me she found him on the sofa clutching his chest and almost like he was out of it. And they don’t got health insurance, so I thought maybe you could help.”
“Of course,” she smiled softly. “What’s your uncle’s name?”
“Julián Colon,” Twitch answered. “He don’t really speak English, though.”
“Oh, that’s okay. I
”
“I’ll translate,” Rio interrupted.
Before (Y/N) could talk back, Rio opened the doors to the room, and all words died in her mouth. It wasn’t the patient that left her dumbfounded, it was the way the room had transformed into every emergency doctor’s dream. A well-equipped —even if just with the basic necessities— hybrid operating room. She knew she had been the one to make the wishlist and had spent many hours explaining to Rio the necessity for each machine. But she had never imagined that he had listened, much less that he had been able to get them.
Yet, her astonishment had to wait.
In the center of the room, lying on the exam bed, Julian lay still clutching his chest. His daughter was next to him, trying her best to calm him down, but she was also in a desperate mood. The only way either could feel better was if (Y/N) got to work.
On a wooden perch on her right, a white coat with Dr. (Y/N) Marks embroidered on the left side hung. She slipped it on as she got closer before putting on a pair of gloves, and prepared her mental checklist to ensure she didn’t miss a single thing. 
“Ay, doctora,” ["Oh, doctor,"] Elena started before (Y/N) could say a thing. “Que bueno que estĂĄ usted aquĂ­. Este es mi papĂĄ, JuliĂĄn. Se sentĂ­a mal desde hace unos dĂ­as pero no pensĂĄbamos que era algo tan serio. Pero hoy casi como que se me va y no sabĂ­a que hacer. Entonces le llamĂ© a TomĂĄs y pues Ă©l me dijo que la viniera a ver." ["I'm so glad you're here. This is my father, JuliĂĄn. He's not been feeling well for a few days, but we never thought it was something serious. But today, he seemed out of it and didn't know what to do. Then, I called TomĂĄs, and he told me to come see you."]
“What she said was
”
“No se preocupe, Elena. Voy a hacer todo lo posible para ayudar a su papĂĄ,” ["Don't worry, Elena. I'm gonna do everything possible to help your dad."] (Y/N) smiled, interrupting Rio as he had done before. The look of surprise on his face was one she wished she’d had the time to take a picture of and frame. That would be the last time he ever underestimated her. “Buenas, Señor ColĂłn. Soy la doctora estudiante (Y/N) Marks y le voy a estar atendiendo. Su sobrino me comentĂł que le estĂĄ doliendo mucho el pecho. Antes de poder continuar con cualquier cosa, Âżpuede hablar bien o necesita que su hija hable por usted.” ["Hello, Mr. ColĂłn. I am student doctor (Y/N) Marks, and I'm gonna be seeing you today. Your nephew told me that your chest is hurting. Before anything else, are you able to speak, or do you need your daughter to speak for you?"]
“Puedo hablar,” ["I can speak,"] he said, trying his best to smile, but it came out more like a grimace. “Y por favor, llámeme Julián.” [ "And, please, call me Julián."]
“Muy bien, Julián,” ["Very good, Julián,"] she smiled as she slid her stethoscope from her neck and placed the earpieces in. “Voy a poner esto en su pecho para escuchar su corazón y sus pulmones. Lo va a sentir bien frío, así que mil disculpas. Y voy a necesitar que respire profundo hasta donde pueda cuando le diga. ¿Vale?” ["I'm going to place this on your chest to listen to your heart and your lungs. It's gonna feel really cold, so I'm sorry about that. And I'm gonna need you to breathe as deeply as you can when I tell you. Okay?"]
The man nodded as she slipped the bell through his button-up shirt. He winced at the cold but remained as still as possible as (Y/N) instructed him to breathe in and then out, repeating the words until she had checked every part that she needed to. Then she pulled out her manual blood pressure monitor, chuckling to herself as she used it. The instrument was almost obsolete, but she preferred it. The ability to hear her patient’s pulse that clearly made her feel connected to them. She wasn’t just sticking a machine to them and pushing them aside, she was caring for them every step of the way. Maybe that’s why she had gotten the most accurate readings in her class.
“Vale,” ["Alright,"] she said as she wrote down her notes on the patient practice sheets she always carried. “Me mencionó dolor en el pecho. ¿Cómo del uno al diez, diez siendo lo peor, cuán fuerte es el dolor en el pecho?” ["You mentioned pain in your chest. From one to ten, ten being the worst, how strong is your chest pain?"]
“Pues como un seis o un siete,” ["Well, like a six or a seven,"] he groaned slightly. “Pero me siento como mareado y con falta de aire.” ["But I feel dizzy and out of breath."]
“Y desde hace cuántos días siente este dolor?” ["And how many days ago did you feel this pain?"]
“Pues como desde la semana pasada. Me empezĂł como un dolor en el cuello pero no pensĂ© era algo grave porque me dan a menudo por el trabajo,” ["Well, since the last week. It started as pain in my neck, but I didn't think it was anything serious since it happens a lot because of my job,"] the man explained slowly. His breath wheezed every so often, making everyone but (Y/N) flinch. But she had to keep him awake, and she had to keep him talking. “Pero hace unos dĂ­as como que me empezĂł a faltar el aire. Y yo me dije, pos, es gripa. Hasta que hoy el dolor me cogio todo el pecho, el cuello y el brazo. Y, doctora, siento que me voy.” ["But a couple of days ago, I started feeling shortness of breath. And I told myself, well, it's the flu. Until today when it spread to my chest, my neck, and my arm. And, doctor, I feel like I'm going."]
“Tranquilo, JuliĂĄn. Todo va a estar bien.” ["Keep calm, JuliĂĄn. Everything is gonna be okay."] She placed a comforting hand onto his forearm, wearing the same warm smile she wore at the hospital. “Ahora te voy a hacer unos exĂĄmenes rĂĄpidos para verificar cĂłmo estĂĄ su corazĂłn. No es motivo de alarma, es solamente un examen estĂĄndar que nos ayudarĂĄ a descartar o acertar quĂ© estĂĄ pasando.” ["Now, I'm gonna do some quick tests on you to check the state of your heart. There's no need to be alarmed, it's only a standard test that will help us discard or ascertain what is going on."]
She looked around the room for a second until her eyes fell on the very thing she needed. “Hey, Twitch,” she called. “Can you roll over that machine that looks like a laptop and has a lot of wires to the side? Oh, and the one that looks like it has a TV on top.”
“Uh, sure thing,” he stammered as though he was breaking out of a trance. He brought the EKG and the Echo machine over, gifting (Y/N) a soft smile. “Here you go.”
“JuliĂĄn, le voy a abrir la camisa un poco para poder colocarle estas pegatinas en el pecho. EstĂĄn conectadas a esta mĂĄquina que nos enseñarĂĄ cĂłmo estĂĄ latiendo su corazĂłn. ÂżVale?”["JuliĂĄn, I'm going to open your shirt a bit so I can place these stickers on your chest. They're connected to this machine that will show us how your heart is beating. Alright?"] After the man nodded, (Y/N) did as she had said. She opened his shirt enough she was able to set all of the chest leads where they needed to be before moving on to placing the ones on his arms and legs.
“¿Por quĂ© tantos cables?” ["Why so many cables?"] Elena’s curiosity interjected.
“Es para tener una mejor lectura de su ritmo cardiáco,” ["It's to get a better reading on his cardiac rhythm,"] (Y/N) explained. “Se puede tomar solo del pecho pero de esta forma podemos ver como está el pulso en sus extremidades a la vez.” ["It can be take only on the chest, but this way we can see how the pulse is spreading to his extremities at the same time."]
“Elenita, deja que la doctora trabaje,” ["Elenita, let the doctor work,"] Julián croaked out softly.
“No es ninguna molestia contestar preguntas, Don Julián,” ["It's not trouble to answer questions, Mr. Julián,"] she chuckled. “Entiendo que es un momento estresante.” ["I understand that it's a stressful moment."]
(Y/N) allowed the machine to run for a couple of minutes before she was able to let out a breath of relief. The evidence was small, almost invisible to the normal eye. But she could see it. Right below the normal line, she could see it.
“¿QuĂ© ve, doctora?” ["What do you see, doctor?"] Elena asked. “¿EstĂĄ todo bien?” ["Is everything okay?"]
“Bueno, Âżpuede ver esta pequeña hundidura en el patrĂłn?” ["Well, do you see that small dip in the pattern?"] she said as she pointed at the slight difference in the wave pattern. “Esto nos muestra que el corazĂłn no estĂĄ latiendo como debe. Pero, no es nada alarmante al momento. La diferencia no es substancial. Por lo que puedo ver al momento, Don JuliĂĄn sufriĂł de un pequeño ataque al corazĂłn. Pero no parece que haya sido algo muy grave. Ahora le haĂ© un ecocardiograma que me ayudarĂĄ a determinar como estĂĄ trabajando el corazĂłn ahora mismo.” ["This show us that his heart is not beating as it should. But, it's nothing alarming at the moment. The difference is not substantial. From what I can see at the moment, Mr. JuliĂĄn suffered a small heart attack. But it doesn't appear to be too serious. I'll do an echocardiogram now that will help me determine how the heart is working right now."]
“¿Un ataque, doctora? ¿Cómo no puede ser grave?” ["A heart attack, doctor? How can it not be serious?"]
(Y/N) covered the transducer with a small amount of gel before answering, “Hay veces que el corazón sufre por otros motivos. Por ejemplo, como había mencionado, Julián tenía la presión bastante elevada cuando llegó. Y si los síntomas comenzaron aproximadamente hace una semana, es probable que ha estado con la presión alta desde entonces, lo que cause que el corazón trabaje más fuerte de lo usual y suceda un evento así.” ["There are times the heart suffers for other reasons. For example, as I mentioned, Julián had quite a high blood pressure when he arrived. And, if the symptoms started about a week ago, it's probable that he's had high blood pressure since then, which would cause his heart to overwork more than usual and cause this kind of thing."] She faced the man again and explained the gel would be cold against his skin, but she needed to get an in-depth image of his heart, and that, if he could, to remain as still as possible.
Everyone remained silent as she moved the wand around his chest, the only sound heard was the fast rushing of blood in his body. It was strong and steady, and exactly what she wanted to hear. As each minute passed, black-and-white images of a strong heart appeared, and (Y/N) was grateful it wasn’t a more serious scenario. Since Julián had seemed to start to calm, his heart appeared to be less strained. It showed no signs of blockage or any areas that seemed to be dying or malfunctioning. The muscle was working as intended and beat hard against his chest. It was as healthy as could be in the situation, and it relieved her that not more would happen to the man.
“Bueno,” ["Well,"] (Y/N) sighed contentedly. “Por lo que muestran las imagenes, su corazĂłn esta en buenas condiciones dada las circumstancias. ÂżEn estos dĂ­ĂĄs ha estado en alguna situaciĂłn que le haya provocado un alsa en estrĂ©s or presiĂłn?” [ "From what the images show, your heart is in good condition given the circumstances. Have you gone through any situation that could have provoked speak in anxiety or pressure in these few days?"]
“No. No que yo sepa.” ["No. Not that I know of."]
“Vamos, papá,” ["Come on, dad,"] Elena scolded gently. “Están despidiendo a personas en su trabajo y la carga ha caido sobre los empleados que siguen allí. Es básicamente el doble del trabajo por la misma paga. Es una presión inimaginable pero el nunca lo admitiría.” ["They've been laying people out in his work and the weight had fallen onto the employees that are still there. It's basically double the work for the same pay. It's an unimaginable pressure but he'd never admit it."]
“Son agobios del oficio,” ["It's just cons of the job,"] Julián shrugged. “Y no estamos en una posición donde pueda dejar el trabajo.” ["And we're not in a position where I can leave my job."]
“Le entiendo, Don JuliĂĄn,” ["I understand, Mr. JuliĂĄn,"] (Y/N) smiled softly. “TambiĂ©n le pregunto, Âżusted toma o fuma? Y si la respuesta es sĂ­, Âżcon cuĂĄl frecuencia?” ["I also have to ask, do you smoke or drink? And, if the answer is yes, with what frequency?"]
“Eh, bueno, sĂ­ fumo,” ["Uh, well, I do smoke,"] he admitted sheepishly. “Alrededor de cuatro a cinco cigarillos al dĂ­a. Y pues, bebo dos o tres cervezas en la noche por eso de bajar el estrĂ©s.” ["Around four to five cigarettes a day. And, well, I drink around two or three beers at night to destress."]
“Papá, me dijiste que ibas a dejar el cigarillo. Sabes que no es bueno para ti.” ["Dad, you told me you were gonna quit smoking. You know it's not good for you."]
“Ay, sí, mija, pero es difícil,” ["I know, mija, but it's hard,"] Julián sighed. “Usted entiende, doctora. Es difícil dejarlo.” ["You understand, doctor. It's hard to quit."]
“Entiendo que es difĂ­cil, Don JuliĂĄn, pero este evento complica las cosas. Va a tener que hacer grandes cambios en su vida para evitar un ataque mĂĄs grave. Especificamente, un ataque que deje daños irreparables a su corazĂłn. El corazĂłn no es como los demĂĄs mĂșsculos y Ăłrganos. DespuĂ©s de que se daña aguna parte del, no vuelve a generarse y sananarse. NecesitarĂ­ĂĄ de intervenciĂłn mĂĄs sofisticada,” ["I understand it's difficult, Mr. JuliĂĄn, but this episode complicates things. You are gonna have to make changes in your life to avoid a bigger attack. Specifically, an event that will leave irreparable damages to your heart. The heart isn't like other muscles and organs. Once any part of it is damages, it will not regenerate or heal. You will need more sophisticated intervention,"] (Y/N) explained as gently as possible. It was a situation that warranted big life changes. “Mientras mĂĄs edad, mĂĄs propenso es a tener otro ataque. AsĂ­ que, es necesario tomar ciertas decisions sobre su vida. Por ejemplo, dejar el cigarillo y disminuir el consume del alcohol es un comienzo. TambiĂ©n, comer mĂĄs saludable y llevar una rutina de ejercicio es necesario. Pero sobre todo buscar una forma de manejar el estrĂ©s y mantener su presiĂłn en un estado saludable es esencial.” ["The older you get, the more susceptible you are to have another episode. So, it's necessary to take certain decision regarding your life. For example, quitting cigarettes and diminishing your alcohol intake. Also, eating healthier and having an excercise routine is necessary. But overall it's essential you find a way to manage your stress and keep your blood pressure in a healthy state."]
“Lo mismo que te llevo diciendo, papá,” ["That's what I've been saying, dad,"] Elena reinforced, a look of victory in her eyes. “Vamos a ver si escuchas a la doctora entonces.” ["Let's see if you listen to the doctor then."]
“Don JuliĂĄn, es muy importante que haga cambios en su dĂ­a a dĂ­a para asegurar que otro evento como este no le afecte. O por lo menos que pase despuĂ©s de muchos, muchos años.” ["Mr. JuliĂĄn, it's very important that you make changes in your everyday life to ensure that another episode like this one doesn't affect you. Or, at least, that it happens very, very far in the future."] (Y/N) spoke as she examined a cabinet labeled as medicine, looking for a specific white bottle. “Ahora, le voy a dar esta aspirina como precauciĂłn. Por si acaso hay algun coagulo que escondido por ahĂ­. Luego, quiero que descanse por algunos dĂ­as. Necesita darle un descanso a su corazĂłn y a su mente antes de volver a su trabajo. De necesitar alguna prueba de mĂ©dico, solo me tiene que contactar y buscare una manera de hacerle llegar una. Pero, por el momento, lo que necesita es descansar. En lo prĂłximos dĂ­as podrĂĄ sentirse mareado, fatigado, o hasta con nauseas. Esto es normal, pero si continua o sus sĂ­ntomas empeoran, por favor dĂ©jemelo saber.” ["Now, I'm gonna give you an aspirin as precatution. Just in case there is any blood clot hidden in there. After, I want you to rest for a couple of days. You need to give your heart and your mind a break before returning to work. If you need a doctor's note, all you have to do is contact me and I'll find a way to get one to you. But, for the time being, what you need to do is rest. You might feel dizzy, fatigues or even nauseous in the coming days. That's normal, but if it persists or your symptoms worsen, please let me know."]
“Yo me aseguro que siga sus instrucciones, doctora,” ["I'll make sure he follows your instructions, doctor,"] Elena smiled, placing a gentle hand on her father's shoulder. “Y tan pronto llegue a casa voy a botar todas las cajetillas de cigarrillo que encuentre.” ["And as soon as I get home, I'm throwing away every single cigarette carton I find."]
“Buena idea,” ["Good idea,"] (Y/N) laughed. “Ahora le voy a poner una bolsa de agua salina intravenosa, solo para ayudar al cuerpo en cuestión de hidratación. Tan pronto la bolsa se termine, podrán irse a su casa.” ["Now, I'm gonna give you a saline water IV bag, just to help your body in terms of hydration. As soon as the bag is empty, you can go home."]
“Muchas gracias, doctora,” ["Thank you so much, doctor,"] the man smiled gratefully as (Y/N) walked toward the IV bag storage and rummaged for a sterile needle set. “Gracias a Dios que Tomasito conoció a una joven tan talentosa e inteligente como usted. No tengo con que pagarle pero si le puedo cocinar. Así que un día de estos tendrá que venir a nuestro hogar para una buena cena.” ["Thank God Tomasito knows a young woman as talented and intelligent as you. I don't have anything to pay you with but I can cook for you. So, one of these days, you'll have to come by our home for a good dinner."]
“No hay mejor pago que ese,” ["There's no better reward than that,"] she smiled as she slipped the needle into his arm and hung the bag on an IV pole. “Ahora, descanse en lo que la bolsa se va vaciando. Y de necesitar cualquier cosa, no duden en llamarme. EstarĂ© solamente a unos pasos de aquĂ­.” ["Now, rest until the bag is empty. And if you need anything, don't hesitate to call me. I'll be only a few steps away."]
“No sabe cuanto le agradezco,” ["You have no idea how grateful I am,"] Elena said as she hugged (Y/N) suddenly. “Que Dios bendiga sus manos y se lo pague mil veces.” ["May God bless your hands and repay you a thousand times."]
“No hay de que, Elena. Estamos aquí para ayudar.” ["There's no need, Elena. Here to help."]
“Cuídala, eh, Cristopher,” ["Take care of her, hey, Christopher,"] the woman said as she released (Y/N), her eyes setting in the quiet form of Rio. “Ella es una de las buenas.” ["She's one of the good ones."]
“Eso parece,” ["That's what it seems like,"] he smiled softly. “Los dejamos descansar en lo que. Voy a mandar a pedir comida así que no se preocupen de nada. Si necesitan algo más, no duden en decirlo. ["We'll let you rest in the meantime. I'm gonna send for food, so don't worry about anything."] Twitch, go ahead and take tonight off to be with them. I’ll send Francis out for some food and call Rod in.”
“A’ight, thanks, man,” Twitch said as he clasped Rio’s hand and took him into a hug before turning to (Y/N)and wrapping his arms around her. “Thank you, (Y/N). You have no idea what this means to us.”
“No need to thank me,” she chuckled softly. “But I am gonna need the story behind the name Twitch, Tomasito,” she teased as he released her. “I am sure there is a great story there.”
“I guess I do owe you one,” he laughed. “I’ll tell it to you soon enough.”
“I’ll hold you to it,” (Y/N) grinned. “Now, go be with them.”
Once Twitch was sat with his uncle and his cousin, (Y/N) and Rio turned to leave the room. But where Rio stopped at the closed door, she kept walking toward the back stairs. Even as he called her name over and over, she didn’t stop until she reached the door toward the roof. She pushed the heavy door, wincing as it creaked. And finally, when she was outside did she feel she could breathe.
Julián had been lucky. There was a high chance that the night could have ended differently for him, and the Colón family would’ve lost a member. She had seen patients pass because of heart problems, and she had dealt with harder cases, but there was something about knowing the people who would hurt that filled her with anxious thoughts. Treating Julián and having it be the best-case scenario in that kind of situation only helped to ease her mind. Still, the rush of treatment had died, and her mind was paying the price. All she needed for a second was to breathe.
A minute or two later, the door opened again, and Rio walked toward her. He sat quietly next to her, the cushion sinking under him as he did. “You did good tonight,” he said as he slid an envelope toward her. “Twitch sends that.”
“I don’t want his money,” (Y/N) sighed, her eyes focused on the horizon. “I’m just glad his uncle is okay. It can be terrifying when someone in your family is going through something, and you don’t know about it.”
“Okay, I get the hint,” he sighed. “You need to understand that it ain’t my place to tell you what your sisters and your friend do. Their business is theirs to handle, and if they didn’t tell you ‘bout it, it ain’t on me.”
“But it’s on you that you didn’t tell me. You knew I was worried about them. Especially when you showed up to Beth’s house. But you all lied to me, and I don’t care if it was to protect me or because it was none of my business,” she fumed. “Do you know how terrified I was this morning when the agent showed up? Especially when he mentioned Beth. I was so worried I’d say something wrong or find a way to screw things up for you. It would have taken just a single answer, and I could have sunk everyone. All because I didn’t know anything. Because none of you think I can handle the truth. And I’m tired of people thinking that.”
Rio remained quiet as he heard her words, struggling as his mind fought with his heart. He wanted to tell her everything right then and there, but he didn’t want to dig her deeper into his world. She could not be collateral damage in her sisters’ decision, even less collateral in all of his.
“Let me guess, Beth was the one that reached out first,” she startled him out of his thoughts. “After the whole thing in Canada, right?”
“Yeah.”
“What do they do for you?”
“They clean my money,” he admitted. “100K a week, and they get a cut. That’s it.”
“Yeah, money laundering. That’s it,” she chuckled dryly. “That’s what you’ve all kept so quiet this entire time? I mean, it’s a step down from robbery and being held at gunpoint.”
“It’s business, (Y/N). It ain’t got nothing to do with you,” Rio shrugged. “And I don’t want it to do anything with you.”
“But it does, doesn’t it? I am in this world, Chris. Every single time I take care of one of your men or I spend a night with you, I become more and more a part of this world.” (Y/N) finally looked at him, her eyes finding his in the night. “I understood from the beginning what being here with you meant. I understood it the second you offered me this job. But I can’t do this if there’s not 100% honesty here. I need to know you trust me.”
“I do trust you, (Y/N). I just
 I don’t know how to do this.”
“Do what?”
“The whole honesty shit,” Rio confessed, running his hands across his face in frustration. “I know how to lie. I know how to give out enough without giving anything at all. But I don’t know how to be honest with anyone.”
“Then start with me. Don’t hide shit like this from me. Answer the things I ask you and give away the things that I don’t. It’s all I ask.” Rio sat back on the sofa and extended an arm for (Y/N) to fit into his side. Without any reluctance, she did, resting her head on his arm and placing a hand on his chest. “I’m just tired of other people choosing what they think is best for me without ever asking what I would want.”
“I can try,” he sighed. “But it ain’t gonna come easy to me.”
“You’ll learn,” she smiled, lifting her head slightly to kiss his cheek. “Now, what do I do about this FBI agent?”
“Well, your sister told me he got a picture of me,” he explained. “I bet she’s in his office right now telling him some story about how we fucked or something. So, I suggest you two get your stories straight. Unless you both want to stick to the same story.”
“You’re really suggesting I tell a federal agent that you slept with two sisters in the same house? Are you trying to make us sound crazy or make you look like a player?” As she laughed, he went to answer. But she didn’t want to hear his words. “You know what? I’ll talk to her then.”
"You don't even know what I was gon' say." 
"And I don't want to." 
"Fine," Rio smiled. "But just let me know what you gon' do. You ain't alone in this, (Y/N)." 
"Thanks," she smiled, sinking into the warmth of his body. "I'm just scared Turner might have something more that he's not showing Beth. Something that will discredit anything we say." 
"It's not your job to worry this much." 
"I think you should be worrying more. He's got your picture." 
"That's nothing," he shrugged. "He can add me on Facebook if he wants more." 
"That joke is still not funny," she reiterated. "Just promise if things get too heated that you'll hit the breaks on everything. I don't want anything to happen to you or my sisters." 
“A’ight. All I can promise is I'll try,” he chuckled, kissing the top of her head. “So, why you know how to talk Spanish? I ain’t ever heard someone speak that good of Spanish when it ain’t their first language.”
“I’ve been studying it since middle school,” she said. “When I entered sixth grade, there had been a new boy in school. Adrián. He had just moved to Detroit from Puerto Rico and had no one there. He spoke English, but everyone could tell he wasn’t that good at it, so people avoided him. So, the very next day, I started reading all the Spanish workbooks in the library and even signed up for the Spanish class. The first thing I learned was to say, ‘Hola, mi nombre es (Y/N)’ and ‘¿Quieres ser mi amigo?’ He told me my pronunciation could be better,” she laughed as she recounted the memory. “We promised to help each other that day. I’d teach him English, and he’d teach me Spanish. We became inseparable after that, and people stopped being assholes toward him.”
“Yeah, kids are the worst.”
“Hey, you have a kid.”
“Eh, he’s the exception,” he shrugged with a chuckle. “Seems like he was a good teacher.”
“He was,” (Y/N) smiled. “Everyone around him just expected him to learn English to fit in. No one even considered learning Spanish instead. They spat all kinds of bullshit toward him like his island wasn’t even a part of the US. It honestly pissed me off completely, and once or twice, I got into some altercations with other students about it.”
“(Y/N) Marks, you were a fighter?”
“Don’t get too excited,” she chuckled, slapping his chest softly. “I only ever got into two physical fights. The others, I just made them feel inferior intellectually. But it seemed to do the trick. And then we dated all through middle school and high school. And I also continued studying Spanish in college because I was already good at it. Language brought us together, and it was the thing that helped us become close.”
“And where is this Adrián, now?” Rio questioned, jealousy laced into his words. “Still very close to him?”
“He’s in California, married, and just welcomed a beautiful baby girl,” she grinned at his obvious envy. “We talk often. Every few months or so. But we’re obviously not as close as we used to be. And we’re definitely not interested in each other in the way we used to be. So, you don’t have to be jealous.”
“I ain’t jealous,” he scoffed jokingly.
“Sure,” (Y/N) chuckled. “There are still so many things you don’t know about me, Chris. And many things I don’t know about you. So, please. Let’s not ruin this before it even had a chance to be anything at all.”
“A’ight, fine,” he sighed in defeat as he raised a hand to caress her cheek. “So, we good? We straight?”
“Well, not just yet,” she grinned. “I’ll forgive you if you order food from Guille’s food truck.”
“I think I can manage that,” Rio smiled before kissing her lips. “I’ll even get you a double order for doing such a good job tonight.”
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andreafmn · 2 months
Text
Bound | Chapter 4
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Word Count: 4.9K Warnings: implied/referenced SA, trauma, trauma responses, mentions of death, torture, mentions of DV
Summary: Rosalie always carried the resentment of not being able to fulfill the image of the perfect family she had in her head. But the universe had set out to grant her everything she could've hoped for in the most unconventional way and in the form of a witch. Can their love withstand the promise of forever or will Rosalie and (Y/N) succumb to the grapples of time?
A/N: So, I noticed that the time span of Rosalie's kills take around a year according to Midnight Sun (which I have yet to read) which is why the timeline won't match up very well, but I think it still works... maybe... hopefully. Sorry it took so long to update this story, I honestly did not have time to keep writing it for a bit. This was meant to come out yesterday but I fell asleep đŸ«ŁđŸ«Ł Also, to any and all survivors of SA that you are not alone and what happened to you is not your fault, it never will be. I hope you have healed or are healing. And if you ever just need an ear to listen, I am here. đŸ€
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Three months had passed since the night that changed Rosalie’s life for eternity, and the Hubert brothers had been found dead. Two, since Ulysses Levitt ran out of town with a girl his family would have never approved, and the body of John Harris was found in his hotel room, asphyxiated and with a broken neck. 
Word had spread through the town of a killer that was taking the lives of prominent young figures. They had ransacked through two families already, and it was rumored they had taken the Levitt son hostage, regardless of the letter left. It made families hold their young ones closer to them, hypervigilant of their every move.  No one wanted their child to be next. No one wanted to weep for their child. Not even for them to go missing. 
Because none of them knew that they had nothing to worry about. 
Well, other than the King family. The royal family of Rochester, New York, would suffer a great loss that night at the hands of who would have been their greatest acquisition. She would take his life into her hands the way he had done with hers. He would clamor for mercy, beg for forgiveness, plead for another chance. And she would laugh in his face. 
There weren’t many places Royce could hide in that Rosalie would not have found him. He could have hidden a thousand feet underground, and she would have carved at the ground with her own hands until she got to him. He would not get away from her without paying for what he had done. She was judge, jury, and executioner, and she would make sure his sentence was fulfilled. 
In the Cullen residence, the other three vampires walked on eggshells around Rosalie. The anger that radiated from the girl was hot enough that any closeness could leave them burned. Even if their words and worries came from a place of concern –at least from Carlisle and Esme– she did not want to hear them. All she had time for was her revenge. There was nothing else she had to look forward to. 
She didn’t want to be angry. It was an all-consuming emotion that she did not wish to impart on the family that had “rescued” her.
“Good morning, Rosalie,” Esme called the girl’s attention as she readied herself for the day. “How are you feeling today?”
“As well as I can be while my rapist’s heart still beats,” she shrugged, brushing the golden curls in her hair. “Apart from that, I guess not worse than I felt yesterday.”
“That’s good, I think,” the woman offered a smile. “Hopefully tomorrow is better.” 
“Oh, it will be. Once Royce gets what’s coming for him, the universe will balance itself out. After that
 well, we’ll see when we get there.” 
Esme remained quiet for a moment, weighing whether or not her words were welcomed in the blonde’s space. The last thing the woman wanted was to make something snap inside the girl. She was already fragile as it was, even if she wouldn’t allow herself to be, and Esme didn’t want to be the drop of water that made her cup overflow. “May I offer you some words?” she asked against her better judgment.
“If you’re trying to get me to see how wrong it is to take a life, please save your breath,” she responded, holding in her laughter at the irony of her sentence. “Carlisle and Edward have tried, and I can tell you there is nothing you can say that will make me desist from my plan.” 
“Well,” Esme sighed with a smile on her face. “Then, can I tell you about my story? I can’t say that I lived through the horrors of what you did, but I did have my own monster.” The blonde simply nodded in approval, her attention fully on the woman before her. “I didn’t envision my life turning out this way, much like you. When I was younger, I dreamed of being a school teacher. I wanted to mold the minds of my students and help them navigate this crazy world. But my parents wanted me to be the perfect wife. They wanted me to stay home and marry. And I did. I thought then that my life would be better. That’s what my parents had promised, so that’s what I believed. 
“Yet, the man that I married became the monster in the fairytale my parents had designed. He was abusive. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. He made me feel like I had no escape. And my parents perpetuated that behavior. They told me to keep it quiet. That no one in town would ever believe that he could do anything like that,” the woman continued. Rosalie could tell how difficult it was to tell her story. She could see the fear flashing in her eyes and the tremble in her hands as she felt the ghosts of her past creeping up her neck. And she wondered if that was the way she would look. Regardless of her impenetrable body, anyone would be able to see the pain plastered on her face. “There was some solace when the Great War passed. He was drafted, and I had months of peace. I learned that you don’t know how deep in the chaos you have gotten until you see a way out. Deep down, I hoped he never returned. It was easier to be a widow than to live the rest of my life in fear.
“But, much to my dismay, he came back once the war had ended. I knew my sentence was until death did us part. Until I became pregnant a few months after his return, and there was a new life to fight for,” Esme said. “I ran as far as I could. I needed to protect my baby, and I couldn’t do that if I was dead. He found me the first time, though. So, I ran again. For some time, I even became a teacher. For the first time in so many years, I was happy. I had fulfilled my childhood dream, and I was building my own family. But all of that ended when my baby died only two days after being born. I had changed my entire life for my son, and he had been ripped away from me in just 48 hours. With him gone, I had nothing left to live for. And well, after all that, Carlisle changed me. 
“I will say that I assimilated to this life quickly. It was easy when the alternative had been so horrendous for me. But, the reason I’m telling you this is not because I just wanted you to hear my sorrowful story,” she chuckled softly. “A couple of years after I was changed, Edward grew rebellious. We didn’t have a bad life, much less a bad relationship. But he was only a year younger than you are when he was turned, and he was growing angsty with our way of life, especially our diet. He went on a rampage, finding the worst of the worst among humans using his ability. He only returned to us two years ago. But he told me who his first victim had been. It had been my ex-husband. He told me how he made sure he suffered, that he yelled for mercy, and pleaded to God to save him.
“It should have made me feel better that he was gone. That he couldn’t hurt anyone any longer, for the world had to be a better place without another monster walking in its midst. I did feel relief for a second that he could not get to anyone else, but it didn’t really matter. He had still hurt me, and his being dead didn’t change that. All I could do was try and move past it. Not forgetting what he did to me, but learning to live with it,” she explained. Esme approached Rosalie, taking her hands in hers and staring deeply into the red eyes before her. “Killing Royce won’t stop the hurt from taking over your heart, Rosalie, just as I know that killing those other four men hasn’t satiated the ire inside you.”  
“Even if it won’t fix what they tore inside me, I can make sure it doesn’t happen to any other woman. At least, the ones that would have fallen victim to them if they weren’t dead,” Rosalie said through gritted teeth. There were no tears to hold back, as much as she wanted them. She wanted them to make her eyes burn with anticipation, and she couldn’t almost remember that feeling and trick herself that it was happening. But the stream never came. “I cannot let him walk free on this earth after seeing just how well he can hide the kind of monster he is. If he was going to marry me and he did what he did, I don’t want to imagine what he would do to a woman he doesn’t even know. I’m not doing this to heal anything inside me or because I am seeking inner peace. I am doing this so they can never do this again.”
 Esme knew there was nothing she could say that would deter Rosalie from finishing her plan. Instead of drowning with more words, she simply smiled and told her she understood. Before leaving the girl be, she turned and said, “You should take a stroll through the garden. This summer the nightshade has sprouted beautifully.” 
Rosalie stared at herself in the mirror, and the vision that stared back at her startled her. Dressed in a strikingly white dress that was as close as possible to the one she had picked out with her mother was unsettling. Much more knowing that to that day, she should have been already three months married
 or three months dead. 
But she was neither. 
No. Her blood-red eyes reminded her that she was not married and she was stuck in a land that was not quite living but not quite dead. She was stuck as she was in a world that was no longer hers for the taking. Still, if there was one thing that was still hers, it was the ability to taste Royce’s death already. 
She had found his hideout rather quickly. He had trapped himself in the basement of an abandoned bank building that was still under his family’s possession. Little did he know that in his hiding, he had given her the perfect place to rid the world of the monster he was. His soul would forever be trapped somewhere that perfectly represented him –cold, dark, and made just for money. 
Everything was already going to plan. The crate of whiskey had been delivered on time and sent directly into the vault with food and other necessities. All she needed to do was wait it out for an hour. Sixty minutes to allow the paranoia to set in, for the hallucinations to fester, for all the pain and discomfort to rip its way across his body. She would allow the little plant to set her stage because she would be the main act that day. 
Rosalie waited until she could not wait any longer. Until she knew his mind would have started its descent into madness. She wanted him to be trembling in his skin before she made her grand entrance. 
From the bank's main lobby, she could hear Royce’s racing heart, his breathing heave, and his frantic steps. It would have been the most intoxicating song had her heart not been filled with dark hatred. His suffering meant nothing to her until it was her own hands inflicting the pain. She had to get into that room sooner rather than later. 
Though Royce was her main target, she needed to get past the two men that guarded the vault door. Innocent souls that had to be reaped because of the sins of a monster. Her parents had taught her the just paid for the guilty. And in matters of love and war, all was fair. That afternoon, two souls would join the five that had shredded her own. She would grant them a quick and painless death, and go on with the rest of the plan. 
And so, she snapped the men’s necks and laid them on the floor. She closed their eyes and prayed to whatever higher power that was out there to forgive their trespasses, granting them safe passage into the afterlife. There wasn’t much she believed in anymore, but she needed to believe that at least the innocent made their way to something better. 
With those men out of the way, Rosalie could finally accomplish what she had to do. It’s showtime, she told herself. No turning back now. 
The door wasn’t locked, only put together to give Royce the semblance of security. Not that it would have mattered. Supernatural strength and speed allowed it not to matter. Without even knowing it, Royce had written his death sentence the second he had left her for dead. 
“No. No. No. No,” she heard him mutter. “It’s not my fault. It’s not. I didn’t do it.” 
Delirium. Truly perfect. 
“Honey,” she smiled as she burst through the door, making the entire building tremble under her strength. “I’m home.” 
“No, God, please,” Royce cried as he cowered in a corner, his eyes growing as big as saucers at the vision before him. Locked inside that room, he had felt he had started to go crazy. Hidden in the shadows lived the person that had haunted his friends and was haunting him now. He knew whoever it had been was bidding his time, waiting for the right moment to strike. What he had not expected was to see her. “How are you here? How are you showing her to me?” 
“I am not a mirage, dear Royce,” Rosalie said, smoothing down her gown. It dragged behind her as she walked, the sound of the fabric swishing on the ground mixing beautifully with the sound of his racing heart. “I am actually here. Standing before you as I would have months ago.” 
“But you died
 I mean, you had to have died.” 
“Oh, I did,” Rosalie sighed. She crossed the room elegantly, taking in how it had been transformed. An elegant bed was pressed against one of the walls, the sheets perfectly done as though no one had ever dared sleep on them. Truly, the entire place had been decorated to portray a luxury suite, like the ones in the many hotels the King family frequented. Beautiful and expensive. Much like the armchair she sat on to face the man directly. “You see, I stand before you today completely dead. Well
 technically undead. I’m living, but I’m not alive, Royce. I’m what you might call a vampire now.”
“That’s not
 no. That’s not possible!” Royce exclaimed, trembling. The bottle he held in his hands spilled with every shake of his limbs, soaking his shirt. “You’re a ghost. The same one that’s been haunting me for months.”
“I know you wish that were true, Royce. Because maybe then I wouldn’t be able to hurt you.”
“Hurt me?” he said as he cowered deeper into the corner of the room. “Why would you hurt me?” 
“Oh, Royce. I knew you weren’t the sharpest tool in the shed, but I didn’t think you’d be this cretinous,” she scoffed. “Do you really think I’m here just to say goodbye? Darling, I’m here to do so much worse. I’ve already started, actually.” 
“W-what do you mean?”
“Well, I’m sure you can feel the way your heart is racing, how your skin has gotten clammy, and how your brain is all delirious. That was a little gift from me,” she grinned devilishly, examining the perfection of her cuticles. “I know how you can’t resist a glass of whiskey no matter the time of day, and I knew you had a few scheduled shipments of bottles. So, with the help of a beautiful blue flower and absentminded delivery boys, I was able to slip some deadly nightshade into those bottles. Hence, the reaction from your body and your delusions.” 
“You poisoned me? How could you, Rosalie? I don’t deserve this.” 
  “Oh no, you don’t get to speak my name,” Rosalie spat. In a matter of a second, she had killed any distance between them  “My name is the only thing you will never have possession of. Not anymore. And to think you have the audacity to question what you deserve.”
“But I don’t, R
 I don’t deserve this,” he cried as the girl balled his shirt in her hands. “I made one mistake.” 
“What you and your friends did was no mistake, Royce. It was a deliberate and brutal robbery of my innocence, of my life. It was a testament to your true character and the monster that lay beneath sheep’s clothing,” she seethed. “The worst part of it all is that I would have lived with your sins had you simply given me the life I had dreamed of. I would have let you drink until your belly was full of nothing but liquor and beer. I would have let you cheat as long as you came home to me. I would have let you take everything as long as I had my children to care for. And what a waste of a life that would have been.” 
Fat tears fell from the man’s eyes, connecting with the slobber of boogers that escaped his nose, and it disgusted Rosalie to be so close to him. But it was the dangerously fast pace of his heart that thrilled her. It was the perspiration on his skin that edged her on. It was the unnatural dilation of his pupils that made her want to dance in victory. 
She knew he was in pain. She knew that his body wanted nothing more than to reject the poison of the deadly nightshade, but it would never be able to. Not while she was there, witnessing the demise of the worst kind of monster. 
Royce pleaded under his breath, trying to appeal to the human side of Rosalie without understanding that the part he was begging to had died that night. The humanity left inside her dwindled as she stared at the pitiful man. She couldn’t imagine a world where she had ended up with him. At least, for that, she was grateful. 
“You‘ll never find love,” Royce suddenly spat, a sudden rage boiling inside him, giving him enough energy to yell at her. “Not as the abomination that you are.”
“And what is that, Royce?” She said through gritted teeth. “Because the person I thought I loved was you.”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” he barked.  “Don’t think I don’t know about your inclinations. I saw you with my own eyes.” 
“Whatever you think you might have seen will go with you in death. At least you’ll have that memory then to keep you company.” 
“The title of murderer is less vile than the other name. You’re lucky I took pity on you and showed you what you were missing out on.”
“Pity? You took pity on me?” Rosalie took hold of his shirt, lifting him from the ground as though he weighed no more than a dress. “You destroyed me. You defiled me. You took my life. Whatever it is that you think you may know about me did not give you the right to do any of that.”
“I saved you first from a lifetime of embarrassment,” Royce choked, his voice trembling as fear overtook him. “Your lifestyle would have gotten you killed regardless.”
“The only lifestyle that killed me was the one where I chose you,” she spat. “You did this to me, Royce. And now you have to pay.”
She let him drop to the ground to cower into the corner. One second, the man was back to crying and begging. The next, he was clutching at his chest and groaning in pain. “Please stop this,” he groaned. His heart had started running at a desperate pace, trying its best to pump blood to his body. But his arteries were contracting as the seconds passed, and his body would start shutting down soon after. “I know you can. Just please, I promise I’ll be better. Just give me a chance.”
“You had a chance, Royce. This life. This was your chance, and you wasted it. You decided to use your one chance to be a despicable man —driven by your greediness and your ego. You could have led a long and beautiful life,  but you weren’t satisfied. You wanted more and more until there was nothing left to take. Now, you won’t take anything from anyone else.” 
“Please,” he sobbed, but his words came out slurred as the poison kept rushing through his bloodstream. A rash had started peeking through his clothes, burning it way through his skin. He couldn’t choose between scratching at the patches or clutching at his chest, his entire body quickly starting to betray him. “I don’t wanna die.”
“Funny,” she laughed. “I didn’t either.”
Royce didn’t take long to deteriorate. His body was already weak from a diet of fear and whiskey—and the lethal amount of nightshade that she had injected in the bottles. He had gravitated onto his bed, barely hanging on to the little life that was left in him. His lungs wheezed and his skin reddened, his limbs spasmed and his lips trembled, and his eyes never left hers. 
And she stared back. 
“Soon enough, you will stop breathing,” she sighed. “I’m sure you can barely feel your arms and your legs. Just like I know you’re trying your hardest to take in a single breath. Isn’t it terrifying? To lay there and feel your life slipping through your fingers, all because someone else decided that you weren’t worthy of your own life.” 
“P
 ple
 please,” he managed to croak out. Tears stained his face, mixing with the sweat on his skin. “H-h-help
 m-me.” 
“It’s too late, Royce,” she smiled deviously. “Don’t you get it by now? You are dying today. You will lay there and suffer and beg. And then, you will die. Not because it’s justice for what you did to me. But because no one else in this Earth will ever have to meet a monster like you. And I will stay and watch until you take your last breath.”
And so, he begged. Royce begged until the lack of oxygen forced his eyes shut. 
And Rosalie watched. She watched until he took his last, wheezing breath. 
Once she could not hear his heart beating anymore, she spared him one last close-up glance. She stood over him and looked over his corpse, wondering who it would be that would find his body. What would they think happened? The easiest explanation would be a heart attack, but the bodies in front of the vault would paint a different story. It wasn’t because she was worried she’d be caught –there was no way she ever would be– but rather because she wondered what plot would be spun to glorify Royce’s life and condemn his killer. And she was absolutely certain they would never believe a woman had been the one to kill him, let alone the other six men. 
“Rot in hell, Royce,” Rosalie whispered against his ear. “Say hi to your friends for me.” 
The girl thought she had merely spent an hour or two inside the bank, but as she slipped back into the alley, she noticed that the morning had come and gone, and the moon had started to peek its way out on the horizon. She quickly changed out of the wedding dress, ripping it from her skin as if it was suffocating her. Her lungs ached for a breath they didn’t need as something deep inside her snapped. It seemed that Esme had been right. Killing Royce didn’t make her feel better, but it had satiated her conscience. He could not hurt anyone else. 
Rosalie placed a hat on her head to conceal her face as she walked through the barely crowded streets of her home. Whispers on the street spoke of the demented killer that had taken the lives of four young men. Even if it had been a while since he had killed, everyone knew he was still out there. She had expected that much. The fear of the unknown was enough to rattle an entire town, and after Royce, it would be the only topic on everyone’s tongues for a long time. 
What she had not expected was to come face to face with a picture of herself. 
Taped to a lamp post was her last photograph taken with the words MISSING in bold on top of it. Under, a brief description of who she had been was printed, her family calling for any information regarding the whereabouts of their daughter. But that didn’t strike her as odd. She knew her family would be worried—had been worried for months. 
No. It was the small message posted under her family’s plea that made her stop in her tracks, a sudden wave of sadness numbing her limbs. She ran her pale fingers over the withered paper as though she could hear the voice if she touched the words. 
Please help bring our Rosie home, the message read. There are people here who love her more than sunflowers love the sun. 
There was no need for a signature for Rosalie to know exactly who’d had that message printed. She ripped the message from the page, folding it into the bag she had buried the wedding dress in, careful not to wrinkle the paper. 
Her heart wrenched inside her chest as she remembered the last time she had seen this person. The last time she ever would.
Only a week before her wedding, Vera had told her how much she wished Rosalie a long and happy life. As the blonde carried Henry in her arms, her friend placed a soft hand into hers, squeezing comfortingly as she smiled. 
“You deserve happiness, Rosie,” she had said that afternoon. “I just wish
”
“There’s no point in wishing,” Rosalie sighed, her eyes transfixed by the baby in her arms. She had been afraid to look Vera in the eyes —the beautiful gemstone eyes she had adored. “You have your family. And I’m on track to have mine. It is all we ever dreamed of.” 
“But it was supposed to look like this,” Vera had sighed. “Not quite like how it really is.” 
“We knew from the start that it would end this way, V. This is just the world we live in. At least this way, we can still be in each other’s lives.” 
“Even with all your high-class parties and important people to attend?” she had joked. “You really think you’ll have time for me.” 
“Always,” Rosalie had smiled. “Forever.”
“Really? You mean that?”
“Does a sunflower love the sun?”
Now, she had all the time in the world. So much time it could never run out. But there was not a second more she would be able to spend with Vera or with Henry. She’d never again brush away the little boy’s dark curls as they fell in front of his eyes. She’d never again hear Vera calling her name as she laughed. She’d never have everything she wanted —anyone she wanted. 
After what felt like a lifetime of staring at her own face, Rosalie straightened out her dress and made her way back to the Cullen residence as though nothing had happened. She cleared her mind of all thoughts about her best friend and walked inside, ready to shut herself in her room until it was time to feed. 
“You really did it, huh?” Edward taunted. “You really went through with it.”
“Please spare me the mocking tonight, Edward,” she said as she rolled her eyes. “My patience is wearing quite thin, and there’s no telling if I might snap. I have heard that us newborns have a tendency to be twitchy and rather strong.” 
“You’re such a
”
“That’s quite enough, Edward,” Esme interjected before he could go any further. “Leave your judgment inside your head.”
Edward muttered a complaint as he disappeared into the backyard, acting as a teenager reprimanded by their mother. Which, in a sense, he was. 
“Thank you.”
“You don’t need to thank me, Rosalie,” the woman smiled. “I hope that whatever happened today and all those months before brought you some type of solace. I know it will never be enough, but I hope it’s a start.”
“I hope so, too.”  
But she knew her heart would need much more mending than only a few deaths. 
That night, she had pulled out the message from her bag alongside a picture she had managed to take with her of Vera and her in their class banquet. They had worn beautiful gowns and were smiling from ear to ear as they danced together. It was a memory she would carry for the rest of her life. But, then, she had laid in the bed she did not need, pressing the picture and the message close to her chest, and closed her eyes to pretend she could dream she was back there.
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andreafmn · 2 months
Text
Running in Circles | Chapter 9
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Word Count: 3.6K
Summary: (Y/N) Rossi is following in her father’s footsteps by joining the BAU team as a profiler. The girl genius knew almost everything but she could have never predicted falling for Aaron Hotchner, her boss, and her father’s friend. in their world mutual feelings are not enough to push them together. Will all the adversities and obstacles they face pull them together or push them apart forever?
A/N: can't believe it's been over a year since I updated this story. It was one of the first I ever posted but quickly got disheartened by it as I tried to follow the show's timeline (which is non-existent, honestly). I'm trying to get through season 6 as fast as I can because I've already written chapters for afterward, but I need to tie it into the show. Honestly considered putting the story on hold but I got the chapter done 😊😊 Also need to go back and edit this story, especially regarding the POV
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As if by divine intervention, (Y/N)’s phone started ringing. The vibrations matched the fluttering of her heart as she prayed that Hotch could have been thinking about her at that moment as well. Maybe then she could trick herself into believing that fate was playing its cards right.
“Hey, baby girl.”
“Derek,” she sighed quietly, trying her best not to voice her disappointment. “What’s up? Everything okay?”
“You mind some company for tonight? I got a bottle of whiskey with our names on it.”
“Know what? After the day we just had, sure.” She looked down at the pan of lasagna and decided if she couldn’t enjoy it with Hotch, she’d enjoy it with a friend. “I’ve got some lasagna going in the oven we can eat.”
“Sounds perfect. I’ll see you in about fifteen minutes.”
After the phone clicked, she decided the most prudent thing would be to send Hotchner a text message thanking him for the food and saying she’d update him on everything tomorrow. After everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours, she needed a moment of calm and clarity. A moment with certainty rather than mixed signals and stolen glances. She just needed a moment to breathe.
As any evidence of the day shed from her skin in the shower, a loud knock rang through the house. She quickly stepped out of her bathroom and slipped on a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie before she ran down the stairs to be met with Derek already inside the kitchen, digging a fork into the piping hot lasagna, with Spencer staring at our friend as he ate like a maniac.
“You know, if you let it cool down a bit, you can savor the taste,” Reid chuckled.
“I know,” he spoke with a full mouth. “But I wanna get drunk tonight, and I won’t do it on an empty stomach.”
“There’s some garlic bread in the toaster oven if you need something that will soak up the alcohol,” (Y/N) laughed as her two friends came into view in her kitchen. “And it’s good to see you’re putting those emergency keys to good use.”
“Sorry, (Y/N),” Spencer responded quickly. “Derek said you wouldn’t mind. We waited five minutes outside.”
“It’s fine, Reid. But you could’ve checked who was at the door.”
“Well, I didn’t want to overstep,” he shrugged. “It’s not my house after all.”
“Good to know you have boundaries, Reid,” she chuckled. “Not that they stopped either of you from letting yourselves in.”
Derek only grumbled in response, too focused on serving the plates and stuffing his mouth. (Y/N) headed to the front door, unsure of who else could have decided to drop by. And though a part of her wanted it to be Hotchner, she knew better than to live in that delusion. He was back in his home with his son, while she had a house full of friends and him on her mind.
“‘Em,” the woman smiled as she opened the door. “Derek invite you too?”
“As a matter of fact, he did. But I’m guessing he didn’t tell you I was coming over.”
“I’m just glad you didn’t use your emergency key as freely as those two boys.”
“Well, you did say we should feel at home,” Morgan grinned. “I’m just doing what you told me to.”
“First time you follow the rules, Morgan,” Emily teased. “Although I’d rather you guys break into (Y/N)’s house than mine.”
“Geez, thanks, Em,” she chuckled. “You’re lucky there’s enough food and booze to go around. But don’t go too crazy. We still have work tomorrow.”
“As if you’d ever let us go hungry,” Emily laughed. “Your Italian blood would never let you.”
“All I need to know is if there’s anyone else that will show up out of the blue.”
“Not that I know of,” Derek shrugged. “Now open up that bottle, I’m thirsty.”
By the time midnight rolled around, Emily and Derek had gone back home. They had eaten enough and drank enough the exhaustion was making their eyelids flutter. And all of them knew that the longer they stayed, the harder it would be to make it back to their homes. Only Spencer was left, curled up on the sofa, still nursing the same glass of whiskey from the start of the night. His eyes were squeezed shut, a hand over them blocking the overhead light.
“You okay, Spence?” (Y/N) asked as she sat by his head, resting it gently onto her lap. She ran her fingers through his curls, massaging his scalp softly. “You got a migraine?”
“Something like that,” he sighed. “They’ve been going on for a bit, but lately, they’ve been worse. The pain is unbelievable, and it makes me sensitive to everything around me.”
“Have you gone to a doctor? This could be something serious, Spence,” she worried. “I have a friend that might be able to squeeze you in. She’s a neurologist and
”
“I’ve got it handled, (Y/N),” he chuckled softly. “I made an appointment for later in the week. I just have to power through the remaining days with sunglasses and pills.”
As soon as he mentioned the pain, a question popped into (Y/N)’s head that she did not want to ask. It was composed of words that could only bring back horrors from his past and the mistakes he was still paying for to that day. The last thing she wanted was to resurface that horrible period, but she had to know. For his sake, she just had to.
“I haven’t taken Dilaudid,” he said before she could speak. “It hasn’t even crossed my mind.”
“How did you
?”
“You were thinking too loud,” he responded as he grinned slightly, his eyes still closed. “And you’re the only one that still asks.”
“I’m sorry, Spence. I don’t mean to be so pushy, she sighed as she stared at the way her fingers ran through the brown of his hair. “If you don’t want time to ask, just
”
“No. I’m grateful that you do.” His free hand searched for hers, squeezing it softly as he enjoyed the warmth of her skin. “I sometimes feel that the team goes out of their way to pretend that part of my life didn’t happen or that it could never happen again. But it did, and it could. Still, I know I can always count on you to look after me, (Y/N). Even if I’m a couple of years older than you, you always find a way to take care of me.”
“And I always will, Reid. You’re a part of my family, and I take care of my family,” she responded softly. “Do you wanna stay here tonight? If it’s too bad, I don’t want you driving out there in the dark.”
“Honestly? Yeah,” Spencer breathed. “I don’t think I could make it home right now.”
“Alright, then. Why don’t you head on up and take a shower while I prepare you some tea and get you a cold compress for your head?” (Y/N) instructed. “You can take any of the sweats from the guest room, and I’ll fetch you some migraine pills so you can hopefully get some shut-eye tonight.”
“Thanks, Rossi,” the man smiled, finally allowing his eyes to open, finding that she had dimmed all the lights. “Don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“And you’ll never have to find out,” she smiled. “Now, go on upstairs, and I’ll get started on the tea.”
“Fine,” he jokingly whined. “And can you not tell anyone else? I don’t want them worrying about me.”
“I won’t. Just, please keep me updated.”
“Copy that.”
As he disappeared to the second floor, (Y/N) couldn’t help but worry about her friend. Spencer had gone through things that were unimaginable. And though he came out of them with his life, they had slowly started to eat away at him. She knew firsthand just how debilitating anxiety could be to someone’s body, and it concerned her that he was downplaying his symptoms.
She set her kettle to boil as she searched for her own mixture of sleepy-time tea—chamomile, lemongrass, peppermint, and lavender. From her cupboard, she pulled out the purple and blue mug Spencer had always used since he had claimed it was able to keep his tea warm enough to sip slowly. Because apparently it had always been a big concern of his. After placing the tea infuser into the mug, she drizzled a few circles of honey to the bottom and a sprinkle of cinnamon. And once the kettle beeped, she drowned the leaves and the honey in boiling water.
(Y/N) could hear the shower running upstairs as she let the tea seep into the water, and all she could do was worry. Granted, it was something she did every single day of her life. She worried about her father spending all his time in books and his work and not enough on his personal life. She worried about little Jack having to grow up without his mother and a dad who didn’t quite believe he could do a good job as a father. She worried about Hotch, about what he did or didn’t feel. She worried about the team every time they went out on a case. And most importantly, she worried about herself and how she would ever live up to the people around her. Now, she added Spencer’s migraines to the list. If she ever made it to old age without a heart attack, she would have been very surprised.
Walking up the stairs with the mug and the pills, her phone vibrated in her pocket. She balanced the mug on the flat handrail and pulled out the device to see Hotchner’s name lighting up the screen. Her heart hammered against her chest, making her hands tremble with nerves. It was just a phone call., she told herself. He was probably only calling to thank her again.
“Hotch,” she breathed, her voice croaking more than she intended. “Hey.”
“Sorry. Did I wake you?”
“No!” she answered quickly. “I was just heading up the stairs. Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, you don’t need to worry,” he assured. “It’s just that Jack wanted to say goodnight and thank you.”
“Isn’t it a bit late for him to be up?” (Y/N) smiled. “I mean, it is still a school night.”
“I caved,” Hotch chuckled. She could hear the exhaustion still present in his voice, and all she wanted to do was help him. It was all she could do. To him, she’d always be just a friend, a coworker, his colleague’s daughter. “Please don’t hold it against me.”
“I could never,” the woman laughed. “I would have probably caved too.”
“Well, then, I’ll put you on.”
(Y/N) heard scuffling from the receiver before Jack’s voice came through. “Hi, (Y/N),” he said. “I wanted to say goodnight since we couldn’t say goodbye to you. I had a lot of fun this weekend.”
“Aw, buddy, I’m glad,” she cooed. “I loved having you over. You know you’re welcome any time.”
“Thank you, (Y/N)!” he beamed. “But I gotta go to bed now. I have school tomorrow. So, goodnight!”
“Good night, Jack,” she responded. “Now, why don’t you pass the phone back to your dad.”
“Alright. Bye bye!”
“Bye, Jack,” she chuckled. “I think that kid should be heading off to bed now, Hotch.”
“He is,” Hotchner answered. “I knew he’d want to after saying good night to you. I think my son likes you more than he likes me.”
“Oh, that’s nonsense, Hotch. He only likes that I’m all fun. But he loves you. Don’t ever doubt that.”
“Thanks, (Y/N),” he chuckled softly. “I’ve been saying that a lot lately.”
“Even when you don’t have to,” the woman sighed contentedly. “Now, go on. You have to sleep too. It’s not just Jack that is up past his bedtime.”
“Very funny, (Y/N). Good night.”
“Night, Hotch.”
(Y/N)’s chest wrenched as her heart accelerated, already wishing the days before could repeat themselves so she could wake and know that he was there. But there was no point in deluding herself. The man could not and would not ever see her as anything more than what she already was. Even their job would allow it. Nothing seemed to ever align for something between them to work.
She turned to the left once she reached the top of the stairs and headed to the guest room to leave the steaming mug for Spencer to find after his shower but found him already sitting on the bed drying his hair. “Was that Hotch on the phone?” She nodded in response. “You didn’t tell him about what’s going on with me, right?”
“Of course not, Spence,” she said in a low tone as she set the mug on the nightstand. “It’s not my information to divulge. Unless it becomes life-threatening, I won’t say a thing without your permission.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course,” she smiled, handing him the pills. “Anything.”
“What do you think these migraines could be?” The pain behind his eyes was more than visible, it was almost palpable. “I just
 what if it’s something serious, (Y/N)?”
“Serious like what, Spence?”
“What if I’m starting to lose my mind?” His voice was frail, trembling at the terrifying thought. “You know, my mom
”
“Don’t go there, Spencer. You can’t go there,” the woman insisted. “We won’t speculate until you have an answer from the doctor. So, I’m begging you, don’t go there.”
“I can’t help it, (Y/N). Either there’s something seriously physically wrong with me, or it’s all psychosomatic. Neither is a good option.”
“I know, Spence. I know. But let’s just not jump to conclusions yet. Not until you’ve gone to the doctor, and we get some type of answer. Until then, I don’t want you to think of the worst-case scenario. It’s not gonna do you any good.”
“Fine,” he sighed as his shoulders slumped forward. “Can I ask you something else? Something that is so off-topic you’ll get whiplash.”
“Go ahead, Reid,” she chuckled softly.
“Do you still have feelings for Hotch?”
The question as innocent, no ill-will behind it. But it still made (Y/N)’s breath hitch in her throat. It had been a long time since any of the people they knew mentioned her less-than-secret infatuation with the unit chief, and it made her heart race like the first time he had confronted her about it. “Yeah,” she muttered. “It’s not something that’s going away any time soon.”
“Have you ever thought of dating someone else? It might help you get over him.”
“I might not be ready for that just yet,” she sighed. “I just can’t seem to stop holding onto hope.”
“I understand. Love
 it’s hard, huh?”
“It’s one thing we can’t learn from all the books we read,” she smiled sadly. “But that’s enough talk. The pills should start to work soon, and you need to sleep.”
“Thanks, (Y/N),” he smiled as he got under the covers. “Thank you for caring.”
“You don’t need to thank me for that, Spence. Again, you’re family,” she grinned. “I’ll see you in the morning, alright?”
“Yeah. Good night.”
“Good night, Reid.”
The rest of the night, Spencer’s words floated in her head. She could open her dating pool and allow herself a little venture. Hotch wasn’t waiting for her, nor had he shown a smidge of real interest in her. Holding onto him only hurt her in the long run, making it harder for anyone else who wanted to take the place he did not want. But she couldn’t. Not now. Not just yet.
After a couple of days and a two-night case all the way in Miami, Spencer asked (Y/N) to accompany him to the doctor for the reading of his test results. He was jumpier than usual, his legs bouncing at a rapid speed as they waited for his name to be called. He figured with his fingers, picking at the skin on the corners until she placed her hand on top.
“You won’t have any skin left for our next case,” she chuckled. “Don’t start jumping to conclusions, Mr. Genius.”
“I can’t help it,” he worried. “It’s all I can do. I can’t just shut off my brain.”
“Then, tell me something. Something I might not know.”
“Easier said than done,” he snorted. “You know almost as much as I do.”
“Ah, you said almost as much. So, you believe there are things that you know that I don’t.”
“Okay,” he chuckled. “Did you know that rubber bands last longer if they’re kept in the fridge? The unusual, lightly cross-linked polymer structure of the rubber used to create them react to the cold differently to what people might expect
”
“Right, the chains heat up when stretched, technically shortening them causing the rubber to contract and eventually snapping at the exothermic change,” she mused. “Cooling them would allow for a bigger stretch and life longevity because the release of energy is slower. Nice fact.”
“See, it’s not as fun with you,” he said with a soft chuckle. “The team would have been asking why I would care about rubber bands. You? You go into a simple explanation of thermodynamics.”
“Well, I ask you for a fun fact. I never said I wouldn’t analyze it.”
As Spencer was about to retort, a nurse came out to call his name, telling him the doctor would see him. He got up onto his feet, smoothing down his pants and taking a steadying breath. But he didn’t seem to do more.
“Do you want me to go with you?” (Y/N) quickly offered.
She was met with a soft smile and a gentle nod before they both headed into the office where Spencer’s worst-case scenario unfolded. The doctor told him there was nothing he could see that was physically wrong with him, the scans and the lab work all came back negative. If there was something happening, it was most likely in his head.
Those were the news Spencer did not want. They terrified him, and he let the doctor know. In his own way. “It’s not—I’m not crazy.”
“Crazy? Dr. Reid, I’m not saying
”
“I have headaches. I have intense sensitivity to light. Because there’s something wrong with me,” he asserted, his words spilling out faster than he could hold them. “Physically, not mentally. It’s not that.”
“That?”
“Listen, doctor, my mother’s a paranoid schizophrenic who’s been institutionalized. So I know very well what mental illness looks like,” Spencer continued. “Maybe even better than you, and it’s not that. It’s not.”
“Reid,” (Y/N) called as the man got up from the exam table and left the doctor with a shocked expression on his face. “I am so sorry, doctor. This topic is just
 it’s a little hard for him.”
“There’s not much you can do to help someone who doesn’t want to accept their reality,” the doctor sighed softly. “Can you just see that he finds a way to manage his stress and his emotions? I truly believe this might be one of the biggest reasons for these headaches.”
“I’ll try my best, doctor,” (Y/N) smiled. “Thank you for seeing him.”
“No problem.”
She found Spencer waiting for her in the hall, his sunglasses on his eyes and his arms crossed in front of his chest. They remained in silence until they reached her car, the doctor’s pout evident on his face. She knew he was annoyed she had apologized for his behavior, but she couldn’t leave without at least giving a reason for his outburst.
“It’s not psychosomatic,” he stated. “It just can’t be.”
“Spence, we have one of the most stressful jobs on the planet. Day in and day out we see cases that astound even the most seasoned officers. And we get into the minds of the people that commit these atrocities,” she offered. “Don’t you think there is a possibility that these migraines are your body’s way of telling you that you need to balance yourself out?”
“If it was really the job like you say, all of us would be getting these headaches,” he said angrily. “But I don’t see Morgan or Prentiss doubling over because their brain feels like it wants to escape their skull.”
“Everyone is different, Spence. And I know you don’t need me to tell you this. Stress presents itself differently in everyone. Just because we don’t know how they handle their burdens doesn’t mean they don’t have them,” (Y/N) continued, maintaining the same calm tone as she cooled him down. “All I am saying, Reid, is that it might be psychosomatic, and you need to find new ways to handle your stress because I am certain this is not you going crazy. Or it might be something else, and you’ll need to get a second opinion. But regardless of what the outcome is, you can’t just get angry at your doctor because you don’t like your results, and I’ll be with you every step of the way. We’ll find you a way through this, okay?”
His stance finally softened at her words. His arms fell to his sides, and a soft smile tugged at his lips. “I was kind of an ass back there,” he chuckled. “It’s just frustrating and terrifying all the same time, and I don’t know how to process it all.”
“We take it one day at a time, Reid,” she smiled, taking a hand of his in hers. “You’re not alone in this.”
“It’s sometimes hard to remember that you’re you get than me,” he snickered. “I’m pretty sure you’ve babied everyone on the team at some point.”
“What can I say?” she laughed. “I just wanna make sure every single one of you is okay.”
And that was one thing she knew she would do for as long as they would let her. For now, her main concern was Spencer’s well-being. And she was grateful that it was enough to keep Hotchner out of her head.
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andreafmn · 2 months
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Hellooo!! :) I was wondering if you are still writing your criminal minds fic “Running in Circles”
I absolutely am. Currently halfway done with the next chapter... after more than a year đŸ«ŁđŸ«Ł
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