- be mindful of what kind of cake you buy. ask for no filling, otherwise you might bite into a slice and taste something salty and meaty.
- when being sung to, listen for disturbances in the sound. there’s a chance the voices will get tinny and high-pitched, like children singing from a television. if they do, look around at once to make sure the people with you are the same that you invited.
- on the subject of invitations, leave your door open for guests, but keep the windows tightly shut. the things that come through the windows are often deceiving.
- you might find a guest who seems to float over the threshold and disappear around the corner, face shadowed and smelling lightly of candle wax. don’t talk to them. don’t make eye contact.
- gifts are not always what they seem. if you see a few more boxes in the pile than when you last looked, don’t open any. it’s not worth the risk.
- don’t give your name to uninvited guests. if you must, give them a fake name, and tell them they may call you that. do not tell them outright it is your name.
- keep your eyes on the candles out of respect, but if they grow higher and/or it’s becoming harder to tear your eyes away, shut them.
- never repeat your birthday wishes aloud, even if someone asks you. don’t lie to them either. they’ll know.
- it is entirely possible to forget how old you’re turning by the end of the night, but don’t worry. you’ll remember eventually.
- you will find traces of your childhood in the backyard that may show up more and more. it’s best to keep the back door locked.
- don’t go out if it’s windy; wind indicates a disorienting year. if you must go outside for any reason during gusty hours, listen to what the wind is telling you, but do not for any reason respond.
- if your birthday is in the summertime, it’s better to have the party in the late morning. most hungry creatures with empty bellies full of summer heat are nocturnal. similarly, if it’s in the winter, have a party at night. ice melts quicker in the light hours, and with it comes the thawing of secrets.
- if you feel violently ill, tired or weak, don’t fret. don’t go to the hospital. to die on your birth date is to attain salvation.
- have fun, and blow out the candles before the party ends!