alsogiraffes

[alsogiraffes]

I had a dream I went to the symphony and the conductor also had a cowboy with him on his little conductor platform. The cowboy seemed to be as much part of it as anyone else. He did a boot scoot, a lasso trick. At the end of the symphony the conductor was like “we flew in one of the world’s leading symphonic cowboys for tonight’s performance” and I felt like some uncultured fucking idiot for not knowing that symphonies had cowboys

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the way aragorn runs is so chaotic

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EMMA. (2020) dir. Autumn de Wilde

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like where did it come from i was literally doing a silly little art and craft

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GODWIN, EARL OF WESSEX Portrayed by David Oakes in VIKINGS: VALHALLA — 1x04 (2022)

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Sometimes fanfiction is a love letter to canon, and sometimes fanfiction is pounding on canon's door and yelling for it to get out here so you can kick its ass.

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Borneo: a biologist is working, looking for snakes in a pond. Orangutan thinks the man is stuck, reaches out a hand to help him climb to safety.

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Baloch woman, from Afghanistan, by Avizeh

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ITS MARCH YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

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I actually really like the thing when you're starting to get the hang of a new language, enough to understand and say simple sentences but you gotta get creative to get more complex thoughts across, like a puzzle. I remember a time in the restortation school when a classmate who wasn't natively finnish and did her best anyway dropped something and sighed, telling me "every day is monday this week. I have had four mondays this week." And I understood.

I don't think I speak much of spanish anymore, but in the nursing school training period I did there, I did manage to get by with making weird Tarzan sentences. I got a nosebleed at some point and startled another nurse. Not knowing the words "humidity" or "stress", I managed to string together: "This is ok. It is hot, it is cold, I have a bad day, I am sad, I have blood. This is normal for me." And she understood.

And sometimes you just say things weird, but it's better than not saying it. One time, I was stuck in a narrow hallway behind someone walking really slowly with a walker, and he apologised for being in the way. I was not in any hurry, but didn't know the spanish word for "hurry", but I did know enough words to try to circumvent it by borrowing the english "I have all the time in the world."

The man burst into one of those cackling old man laughters that they do when something in this world still manages to surprise them. He had to be somewhere between 70 and a 100 years old, and I guess if there was one thing he wasn't expecting to hear today, it would be a random blond vaguely baltic-looking fuck casually announce that he is the sole owner and keeper of the very concept of time.

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I've slowly been chipping away at drawing scenes from that imaginary Muppet retelling of the Princess Bride, figured it was about time to share what I've drawn on Tumblr!

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See I read the prompt and thought “okay if it’s a fairy at the door then either a person dressed as a fairy has knocked on my door, or Fairies Are Real in which case yeah why not. On the other hand how the hell is a walrus gonna get to my porch in Oklahoma.” And then I scrolled down and saw the comic 😂

I've asked this question before and been surprised by the results, now I have access to more weirdos it's your problem:

It is the middle of a Sunday afternoon. You have nothing on, and aren't expecting visitors, deliveries or post.

Unexpectedly, there is a knock at the door.

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if a supervillain said "you wont kill me thatd make you just like me" i would simply say "no it wouldnt id be saving millions of people" and the villain would say "but youd be dooming yourself. could you really live knowing youre a killer" and id say "well id certainly have trouble. ill probably be very sad about it. definitely a lot to unpack" and theyd say "so you wont do it" and id say "oh no im still gonna" and theyd say "what" and id say "youre a supervillain responsible for countless deaths and yet here you are desperately trying to bargain for your life. you want to live. which means you can easily live with yourself after being responsible for countless deaths. i, on the other hand, will at the very least have tremendous difficulty with even killing just one person and at worst might just jump out a window right after i do it. the very nature of this whole conversation about whether we are the same has proven to me we are very much not the same and i am certain killing you to save millions is the morally correct decision here" and theyd say "what" and id say "get killed idiot"

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Do you kids know how hard it is to hyper fixate on shit as a goddamn adult?? Sorry boss I know you need those files done but I’m too busy giggling like a goddamn school girl over a fictional man

[alsogiraffes]

THE LORD OF THE RINGS: The Return of the King dir. Peter Jackson

#this is one of my favorite parts in the whole trilogy #like at the beginning of Mulan when the signal fires light up going down the wall #except there it’s a bunch of soldiers paid to do that while working on a wall built for the purpose of doing that #(I mean mostly built for keeping the Huns out but the signal towers were built in this is an Explicit Function of the wall) #and here it’s just isolated platforms built across the mountains #big bonfire on top of the middle of nowhere #all maintained and guarded by separate individual communities with their own lives and problems #they’ve been dealing with the gradual darkening encroachment of Mordor too #they’ve been losing hope too #and all of them go out in the snow and the wind when they see the signal fires #so they can light their own fires and pass the message on #so that someone far away gets the message that someone else far away needs the help they promised #idk idk I get a little emotional every time I see it

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Paolo Sebastian 2018-19 Autumn Winter Couture The Nutcracker Collection