alittlebitofeverything

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“Missing you is complicated, because I’m not even sure it’s really you I’m missing. Maybe I just miss the warmth in the space between our skin, so close for a moment we felt like we were part of each other, but somehow it never felt like I was holding you tight enough. Maybe that’s why it was so easy for you to let go, because you always kept that space, as an insurance policy in case you ever decided to leave, no matter how badly I wanted you to stay.”

“Small Spaces” K.R.

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“If I really care, I'll try like 400 times. But once I'm done, it's over.”

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you will never get what you deserve if you stay with what you tolerate.

— alhwrites

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Losing you wasn’t just painful, it was fucking damaging also. It wasn’t me sitting down on a couch surrounded by my friends as we watched movies and ate food to try and forget you. It was me staying up at four in the morning because the thought of you was so fucking strong I couldn’t even close my eyes without seeing your face. It was me swallowing thickly and blinking back tears every time I was in public, the hole in my chest causing my breaths to come out shaky rather than normal. It was me laughing at things for no reason as my stomach turned because the urge of falling apart was getting stronger. It was me crying at random hours during the day and me not wanting to get up out of bed. It wasn’t just me staring blankly at your number, deciding whether or not if I should call you. It was me throwing my phone at the wall and breaking it, because I was drunk again and the thought of you ever changing your information terrified me. It was me deleting our conversations and regretting it because now I couldn’t know where we had went wrong. It fucking hurt, losing you had hurt and I wasn’t ever able to forget that kind of pain.

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We could have been happy. I know that, and it is perhaps the hardest thing to know.

— Ally Condie, Matched

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“i still love you. you know that right? i always did, probably always will. lord knows i was never good at letting things - or people - go.”

-and other things i’ll never tell you. c.r.

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My heart breaks. I don't love him anymore. But he claims he loves me. He didn't love me when he cheated on me. Left me. Lied to me. I'm trying to move on but he was my best friend. Nothings the same now. I'm lost. And tbh idk how I'm going to come to terms w the fact its officially over between us. I just want my best friend back. But it doesn't work. We're toxic. I'm a toxic person also with or without him. I just want to be happy. My heart breaks. Not because its over. But because I'm scared to find someone who knows everything about me like he did after 7 years of knowing him. My best friend. My boyfriend. Who I could go to with my health issues and not feel judged. My heart isn't breaking. It's broken. And it's my fault. Or so I think it is.

#sad writing #original writing #my writing #bpd mood #venting #ranting #heartbreak #poemsporn

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No because everytime my dad drinks he literally scares me.

#childhood trauma #adult children of alcoholics

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this is my favorite genre of photos anyone got anymore???

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I love a female with masculine energy🥵

#followforlike #followforafollowback #wlw lesbian #lgbtpeople #lesbian writing #lesbian #lesbian yearning #wlw kissing #wlw community #wlw post #wlw pride

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It's crazy isn't it?

How life can change in the space of a year. I don't like change. I never have. I don't even know what to write I just feel numb. I miss old people in my life. I'm alone. I have people here yes. But its not the people I want who no longer wanted me. I'm just sad and idek where to go w my life. I loved someone once. Alot. 2 people actually. I'm scared to do it again. Am I allowed to love new people? I constantly feel bad for everything I do

#followforlike #followforafollowback #aesthetic #bpd mood #bpd problems #bpd splitting #bpd stuff #actually bpd #bpd feels

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another life

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Cute girl: I should come over and watch a movie with you

Me: *gay panics*